I am in the friend zone right now, however i will not give up. But i'm keeping my options open, i'm not an idiot!!
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I am in the friend zone right now, however i will not give up. But i'm keeping my options open, i'm not an idiot!!
Been in the friend zone... for all my life. I don't really care at this point, but I'm keeping an eye open.
I have friend zoned at least two guys, though I don't recall ever being in it myself.
With regards to exiting the friend zone, I tend to agree with Hank Green's opinion. That is to say, back off. Why?
- Because you're probably smothering them by focusing on them so much, scaring them off
- It probably makes you look a little desperate.
- Like @Goodbye Blue Monday; said, if you're just being such a good "friend" to get into their pants, then you're not really being their friend at all, and it probably wouldn't be good for the longevity of any hypothetical relationship anyway.
Those three reasons are why I'm currently friend zoning a guy I know likes me, atm.
Furthermore, I think the friend zone is a direct symptom of wanting what one can't have: The more available one is, the less one is wanted. I also think it may be complicated by the possibility that some people may become such good friends with their crush that said crush couldn't possibly consider a relationship with one for fear of losing that precious friendship.
the ubiquity and just the whole idea of the "friend zone" is beginning to piss me off
e: the other posters have seriously done a better job than i of making long posts, but i was mad when i wrote this and i want to keep it up
you will get "friendzoned" by people and people will "friendzone" you. hell, sometimes it will be a mutual thing. but really, i see things like "i like this girl but i think i've been friendzoned, so i'm just going to sulk and complain about it on a forum" a lot, so if you're one of the people whom i'm talking about: just ask this person out. there are literally one of two outcomes: he or she accepts or rejects. if the person in question accepts, cool. you have a date. you're officially a badass now. if he or she rejects you, oh well. cut your losses (not yourself), hope to remain friends, and move on. it's not always that simple to do that, i know. but you have to accept this fact in order to progress and mature into the lovely human being i'm sure you will become. if your ardent passion for this woman is honestly so strong that you cannot remain friends with her, you will definitely have to move on. tell him or her that you can no longer remain friends. being honest with yourself and with the other party is much better than ignoring them or falling off of the face of the earth.
also, if you're one of those stereotypical "nice guys" (another term for which i have vitriol) who displays sycophantic behavior in hopes of getting some pussay, please reevaluate your friendships. please don't think that this will work in the end. obviously, treat people with respect, especially the people who you're trying to court or woo or fuck or whatever. just don't be obsequious. don't be that guy. i was once that guy and i can tell you that it doesn't get you anywhere.
but yeah. once you ask someone out for the first time, it will become a lot easier... though this is coming from a guy who's never been in a relationship, so take the advice with a grain of salt!
e: no one asked for my advice
I have to agree with that rant^
Just asking them out makes it easier, and then you know where you stand
I've been friend zoned by one of my crushes, who I've known since middle school, because I hesitated on asking her out. Now she has a boyfriend from her university. I really hate friend zone, for they appear to be a lover's fate worse than death, to the point where you feel like you'll be losing your sanity and start hating on women or love in general wish for them to be obliterated.
Just one man?! I'm a nice/shy guy, I constantly end up in the friend zone; and you know what? I end up being the guy that gets asked for advice, most likely by my crushes, and I have no real dating experience/knowledge.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ghetsis-Dennis
On another note, I experienced a similar experience, only my crush ended up with a kid and now I'm afraid my bond with her is gone....my fault though in away, but when there's a family in the picture I think its best to back down, even as a friend, when you are harboring romantic feelings for another.
You people in the friend zone are there because you hide your real intentions for fear of being rejected/hurt. Take a stand, allow yourself to make mistakes and take some chances, be honest about who you are and what you want.
But what if your real intentions are far too dangerous to release and ends up ruining your life and affect the people around you?Quote:
Originally Posted by lvl 5 magikarp
^^^ That's love in a nutshell. Case and point is this entire damn subforum, bro
Actually, I disagree. Usually I'm friendzoned AFTER I ask them out...I've also lost quite a lot of friends because I tried to take a stand.Quote:
Originally Posted by lvl 5 magikarp
I don't see how this is any different than what i said. You asked them out, got rejected, then pretend you are OK being friends, meanwhile you still want to be in a relationship. You are still hiding your feelings. Only it is after you got rejected. Unless you want to punish yourself, it can be better to cut your losesQuote:
Originally Posted by Go-to IconActually, I disagree. Usually I'm friendzoned AFTER I ask them out...I've also lost quite a lot of friends because I tried to take a stand.Quote:
Originally Posted by lvl 5 magikarp
cut losses how? completely remove myself from contact with her?Quote:
Originally Posted by lvl 5 magikarpI don't see how this is any different than what i said. You asked them out, got rejected, then pretend you are OK being friends, meanwhile you still want to be in a relationship. You are still hiding your feelings. Only it is after you got rejected. Unless you want to punish yourself, it can be better to cut your losesQuote:
Originally Posted by Go-to IconActually, I disagree. Usually I'm friendzoned AFTER I ask them out...I've also lost quite a lot of friends because I tried to take a stand.Quote:
Originally Posted by lvl 5 magikarp
Strange, isn't it...even though I like her, I still feel like I wanna remain friends with her..
I think it's still highly possible to remain friends with someone, even if they don't return the same feelings for you.
Not necessarily, you can stay friends, but be friends as equals rather than have her on a pedestal hoping one day she changes her mind about you. Pursue other girls.Quote:
Originally Posted by Go-to Icon
I, er, I've friend zoned a couple times, because the guys who liked me were getting a little too close for comfort, getting too touchy feely, and asking me to hang out with them too often. People need space and especially someone like me, who's pretty quiet and reserved.