Thread: May-December Relationships

This had to be done.

What is your opinion on May-December relationships?

My aunt's ex-husband is 58. Just recently, he got engaged to his 21-year-old girlfriend. The two are 37 years apart - he is one month younger than his girlfriend's father and nearly a decade older than her mother. Personally, I think it's gross. But oh well, that's what he wants.

Do you know any May-December couples personally? (Examples must be at least 10 years apart.)

I figure that after ten years, any gap is bound to seem some measure of weird or creepy. But hey, if they're in love more power to them.

It depends on how big the gap is, really. My mother and father are twelve or so years apart from each other, and I've never really found that creepy or anything. But I suppose if an age gap is as big as twenty or larger years, that may raise questions.

Like the above posters said, it depends.

I don't really judge people who do partake in the relationships, I mean...I have a crush on Stephen Colbert, and he's going to be 50 pretty soon. Like they say, love is blind. Or...maybe it's better to say that "LOVE DOES WHATEVER IT WANTS."

Sometimes, though, people don't look their age. I have a college senior friend who was dating a high school junior, and I could have sworn that they were the same age. The whole thing also depends on the upbringing. Where I live, girls usually go after older men because they have more maturity and connections.

My attitude is that, yeah, on an individual basis, I don't see anything wrong with age-disparate relationships, so long as the younger person isn't so young they can't consent. Sometimes people fall in love and they just happen to be from different generations.

But I do raise both eyebrows toward someone who is specifically seeking out people to date who are much older or younger than they are. Because it seems like they want a relationship where there's a huge power differential.

I've been attracted to older people; I even had a couple professor crushes in undergrad. But I can't say I've ever seriously considered getting into a May-December romance myself. Mostly because I've had friends who have, and in the best case scenario, the older person pretty much just wanted them for sex and they just wanted them for the money/material goods, and there was no compatibility. In the worst case scenarios, they were emotional rollercoasters full of beyond-fucked-up power dynamics. (I had one friend in college who sought these situations out, sleeping with lots of older men, including one who was her former high school teacher. Oftentimes, she was the "other woman" and they were constantly promising they'd leave their wives for her; of course, they never did.)

Now, would I be closed to the idea of having a fling with an older (but not way older) man or woman? I don't know. But a full-fledged relationship, yeah, no interest.

I guess you're right. It depends on the person.

My ex-uncle has the wedding set for the end of June.