Is it OK to be me?

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  1. #1
    Filthy Human Waffles's Avatar
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    Default Is it OK to be me?

    Hey everyone. This has been bothering me for a long time now.I was wondering if you guys could have any advice for me.

    I'm probably the most different person in my family. Not believeing in God, but trying not to insult people's beliefs. Liking Anime and Godzilla, when everyone in my school is obsessed with Sports and gangs. Reading, when everyone is on their Phone.

    Any time I try to talk about something with my Mom( she's a therapist ) that she disagrees with like my decisions or beliefs, she freaks out and starts yelling at me for bringing up those things. My Dad just takes it like I'm being an annoyance and that my opinions shouldn't be expressed in public.

    And ever since I got in trouble at school(A kid wrote some dirty words on one of the notes I dropped accidently) and got suspended, the school thinks I'm a trouble maker even though I'm in the Honors classes.

    I feel kind of Paranoid about people judging me right now. Am I the problem?
    Last edited by Waffles; 26th August 2009 at 06:58 AM. Reason: os

  2. #2
    amazing Meron's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    There is nothing wrong with you. You just seem to have really bad luck :(

    y team

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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    Yeah, it sounds like you just got the raw end of the stick.
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    Does Team Rocket hire? ImJessieTR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    The people around you, even your family, is more interested in irrational conformity than appreciating you for whom you are. My younger brother and I have the same issues (and yet, actually, we tend to be the most rational of everyone except maybe my maternal grandfather). Continue to be who you are. We need people of every stripe. You will be more creative and intellectually ready than those who just want to stop thinking and live their little shallow lives.
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    A cute little robot girl. Satoshi-kun's Avatar Social Media Deputy Coordinator
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    There's nothing wrong with you... although if you have the money (not sure how much it would cost), I'd threaten the school with getting a handwriting analysis done on that note to prove that it was not your handwriting (there is NO FUCKING REASON why you should be considered a troublemaker when you did NOT do something).

    Honestly though, just love yourself, and remember that while life doesn't really get "more sane" after you leave highschool, it does get a bit easier to be yourself after you leave your highschool and head off to college. It's perfectly okay to be you!

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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    Just be yourself.
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    I bite. Covet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    It's most important to be who you are and follow your own path. As Sato said, it gets easier in college. Besides, the older you get, the happier you'll be that you stayed true to yourself.

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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    I see nothing wrong with you, I think it's the people around you that are weird.
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    The enigma. ii kanji's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    It's definitely not you You don't have to change to be the same and to blend into the background. This is probably just a bad patch and things will improve.

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    Goronda Type Vice-Webmaster Evil Figment's Avatar Vice-Webmaster
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    You have a right to be yourself. In an ideal world, people would respect you as that.

    We don't live in an ideal world, and many people have trouble of one sort or another with differences. There are four ways of dealing with it.

    You change who you are to fit in better with them.
    You remain who you are, and accept that they'll (at best) tolerate it.
    You confront them and demand that they accept you.
    You mix and match the above three.

    There's no "right" or "wrong" way here. Changing yourself is not inherently bad, far from it, and it will probably be best at making you a socially acceptable individual. The second path will keep you out of fights, but you're never going to find acceptance that way (until you meet other people like you). The third path will get you in lots of fight, and probably make many people angry at you...but it just might convince a few of them that there's nothing wrong with what you chose to be.

    The fourth path is my favorite - make a few change to yourself to be a little more socially acceptable but retain a lot of what make you yourself; accept that some people are never going to accept you; try to force a few others to take step toward being more acceptant of you.

    In the end, it all depends on what you want.
    Last edited by Evil Figment; 26th August 2009 at 11:14 AM.
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    Filthy Human Waffles's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    Thanks everyone. I really don't know what else to say though... thanks!

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    I shot a god Ryuutakeshi's Avatar Social Media Editor
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    So what if you're different? What's so great about going with the flow? You become part of a mob, instead of a person.

    Be happy with who you are, and don't let anyone tell you that just because you are into different things that you aren't cool.

    Also, did you tell the school that you weren't responsible for what happened? Cause I'd keep harassing them about how you were unjustly treated and that it wasn't your fault.

    Evil Figment (7:59:44 PM): Ryuu, however shakily you started, I've got to hand it to you that you earned my respect the hard way.

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    is watching you Lil Brother's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    Quote Originally Posted by Waffles View Post
    Liking Anime and Godzilla, when everyone in my school is obsessed with Sports and gangs.
    Question: Do you mean "gangsta" stereotypes or honest-to-God gangs? If you're talking about the latter, then you're in no way in the wrong for wanting to stay away from that mess.

    Any time I try to talk about something with my Mom( she's a therapist ) that she disagrees with like my decisions or beliefs, she freaks out and starts yelling at me for bringing up those things. My Dad just takes it like I'm being an annoyance and that my opinions shouldn't be expressed in public.
    First off, what the hell kind of therapist would act like that? Jeez. Secondly, yeah, unfortunately, not all (or even the majority, it seems like) of parents seem able to be understanding of their teenagers and don't take them the least bit seriously, at least from what I've experienced and heard of. But that's their issue, not your's. You're certainly not the first to be brushed off.

    And ever since I got in trouble at school(A kid wrote some dirty words on one of the notes I dropped accidently) and got suspended, the school thinks I'm a trouble maker
    Agreed with Satoshi-kun.
    even though I'm in the Honors classes.
    Foooor the record, honors classes doesn't automatically make somebody not a troublemaker. Just saying.

    I feel kind of Paranoid about people judging me right now. Am I the problem?
    I'm not trying to belittle your problems, but you ever heard of the spotlight effect? Everyone thinks everybody else notices everything about them, when in reality most people couldn't care less.

    But yeah, what everyone else has said: Unless you're being terrible to people, never doubt yourself as a person or fear you're unacceptable, especially not over simple things like interests and personal beliefs. Unless you're a jackass or something like a rapist or murderer (which I doubt ya are), it's totally fine to be yourself.

    Also, keep in mind you're posting on a Pokémon forum primarily used by older teens and adults. Clearly, you're not the only one with interests which are a little less than mainstream. :P
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    Registered User Kamikarasu's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    Yeah, it's everyone else in your life that's wrong. If almost everyone in your school is into sports and are in gangs, then you're in a school full of idiotic shmucks who conform to everything around them. The things that they conform to around them aren't just idiotic and shmucky (I don't think that's a word) because they conform to everything around them; they're also idiotic and shmuck-y because the things that they conform to are stupid in the first place, yet, if I know anything about the modern-day idiotic teenage shmuck, they almost certainly conform because they themselves are genuinely interested in being the kind of high schooler who uses intolerant words like "f*ggot", who actually think that only tough sports and being in gangs are cool, and who are very unaccepting, anti-intellectual, and shallow.

    I used to think that high school would be like middle school, (with those kind of idiots everywhere) but, in my high school are people who not only don't conform, but that recognize that the arts kick ass, (as well as there being many Pokemon fans) and wouldn't even care about the stupid things that people care about in your school in the first place. Oh, and that doesn't make them nerdy, either. So let me give you a suggestion: GET OUT OF THAT HIGH SCHOOL IF POSSIBLE. If possible, it is essential that you go to an arts school, somewhere where people will actually be accepting and creative.

    As for your parents... That's hard, because not having your own parents even accept your individuality is something that must be impossible to live with. But all I can say is, if, no matter how much you try, they won't accept you simply for being an individual, then, all I can say is... Fuck them. I hope this doesn't offend you, but I'm saying that if they are actually incapable of accepting individuality, even if you've made good arguments to them, then what can you do? If it's in ANY way possible, you really must go to an arts school, go somewhere that you know people will accept you. If you can do that, you'll have about 90% more support and friendship than you do now. Because you'll be somewhere where common sense is not seen as "f*ggy".

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    A cute little robot girl. Satoshi-kun's Avatar Social Media Deputy Coordinator
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    Default Re: Is it OK to be me?

    Quote Originally Posted by Covet View Post
    Besides, the older you get, the happier you'll be that you stayed true to yourself.
    What Covet said here is the truth. While you might not understand this in highschool, or maybe even college... if you stay true to yourself, you will be thanking yourself later in life, and will have something to feel proud of.

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