Thread: TheMissingno's Music Revisited

Hey guys. I'm getting serious about songwriting now. I need actual criticism. I'm actually writing songs with words in them these days. I hope you enjoy.

I'll post the ones with words here, but there are about 10 others right now on my page that don't have words.

My youtube page

Lords

Trust and Defeat

Note: All songs posted here will be originals. Please don't message me asking to give credit to any other artist.

I think you definitely have talent (I didn't expect your voice to sound like that) but it was hard to hear some of your singing over the instrumental. Also,I was thinking, maybe you should type up the lyrics and post them here, just so it's easier to follow along. It will be more helpful when studying the lyrics and how they work with the instrument. Keep up the good work!

With No Goodbye

I'm leaving home this morning
There's a world for exploring
But there's still a task at hand
of the utmost importance
It's too late I'm headed for the sand

After twenty long years of hiding
I'm back but with no idea
The beast must be having some fun
In this world she has overrun
Am I the only one left with sense?
Am I the only one left with hope?


Thanks for watching.

Hey, nice music! You have a nice voice and your guitar playing's great, but maybe you could work on the lyrics? They don't always seem to make sense.

Originally Posted by ii kanji

Hey, nice music! You have a nice voice and your guitar playing's great, but maybe you could work on the lyrics? They don't always seem to make sense.

Yes, that's because they don't actually make sense. Thanks for noticing!

Words

Don't be afraid come speak your mind
And I'll be here to see what you find
They're just words I know it's true
But you don't know what words can do
I'd like to see what happens here
When it all comes out in the air

I see your picture on my wall
An image that won't break my fall
I live my life but you're not there
The shadow of an empty chair
Why could you not speak to me
Happiness does not come for free

I don't know why you lied to me
But your lies have set me free
I know now that I was wrong
I see your face but I've moved on
And in your travels far and wide
I hope you find out what's inside

Your memory haunts my dreams at night
I lie awake wondering what's right
There is nothing I can do
There's nothing I can do for you
Now we've said our last goodbye
All I wanted was for you to try


Thanks for watching.

@ii kanji : I tried to make the lyrics make a little bit more sense this time =)

This is my favorite song of yours so far, just because I really like the lyrics (It make more sense than your other songs). I think music/songs work best when you can relate to it, and can understand what the composer of the song is talking about. The instrumental still drowns out your voice a bit. I think your singing is good, but you need to try to put more emotion into it.

Originally Posted by Paperhorse

This is my favorite song of yours so far, just because I really like the lyrics (It make more sense than your other songs). I think music/songs work best when you can relate to it, and can understand what the composer of the song is talking about. The instrumental still drowns out your voice a bit. I think your singing is good, but you need to try to put more emotion into it.

Actually if I can tell you a secret here, the first three were lyrics that I wrote in high school and just stumbled upon and decided to put to music. The latest one is the first of a batch that I actually sat down and wrote.

Originally Posted by TheMissingno.

Actually if I can tell you a secret here, the first three were lyrics that I wrote in high school and just stumbled upon and decided to put to music. The latest one is the first of a batch that I actually sat down and wrote.

LOL, well, it's nice to see you improved your writing from HS ^^ I hope you write more songs soon!

The Legend of Snowville

Running to the top of a half built bridge
I can see the size of what we did
We've created the best, no we did not rest
Until the blood of our labor had reached its crest

As I look down on this conquered land
Before our people had a place to stand
Yes the ruins are gone, a new world has spawned
I don't see a way to reconcile this loss

Are the cities getting built
Are the ruins getting filled
Do you have any guilt

Through progress and labor we have bought our crown
But on our minions we do not look down
We don't want you to fly, we do not want to die
We can see the fear out of the corner of your eye

People will come and people will go
But that is all that I have ever had to know
Can I have this dance, you've caught me in a trance
All I ever wanted was just one more chance

I cannot contend
Is this really the end
Is this really the end

It's time to leave yes it's time to go
They know all that they have ever wanted to know
Now we must turn around, leaving all we have found
We've done all we can in this one horse town

Now I never thought it would feel so bad
But looking at the ruins just made me so mad
I had your trust, I guess it wasn't enough
I just refuse to believe that this was all a bluff

It's not over yet
It can't be done
But then again maybe it is


Thanks for watching.

Things That She Knows

They've known each other for so long
without a passing glance
He never said a word
She never noticed him
But that all changed one day
And it was alright
alright

She likes to talk about
things that she thinks
people don't know
it is not so hard to see
why he agrees
He likes to do some things
that he knows that
she does not like
but he does not speak so much
and she loved him

Things were going so damn great
he never realized
how it could feel so right
the days were always bright
but did she feel the same
He did not know
Had no idea

She kept all of her thoughts
bottled up so
deep inside her
It would take much more than that
to let them out
When he realized that
things were not as
good as they seemed
It was already way too late
to save, yeah

She had quite enough of him
as the sun went down
She couldn't help but frown
And count the days down
That she had wasted with him
But she could not say it
could not say it

With quiet coldness she
pushed him away
out the doorway
Closing the door locking it as she
threw away the key
He could not forget all the
time they were
both together
knowing that it was all a lie
made him want to die


I worked really hard on this one, sorry I still don't have a decent mic. Thanks for watching.

Awesome job, dude! You have a distinctive voice good for singing, and it's very pleasant to my ears. You're pitch is off sometimes, but I think that can be fixed with some practice. Make sure that when you sing your jaw isn't tense or anything; keep it as loose as possible. Also, make sure you sing with tall vowels; your mouth doesn't have to be super wide, but the wider it goes, the more flat your sound will be. Most importantly, make sure that what you're doing is comfortable - singing is supposed to feel as natural as possible. If a note is too high or too low, you can try putting more air behind your voice, but don't push yourself too hard.

Your guitar playing is excellent, as well. I don't play myself so I can't offer critique in that regard, but keep it up! I liked that you tried to be diverse in what styles you played; I heard rock, country, and some jazz. Find what suits you best and excel at it!

I also enjoy reading along using your lyrics; it's nice seeing you express yourself this way. Keep up the great work! :)

@The Puppetmaster: Thanks for the advice, but what exactly do you mean by "tall vowels?" I'm not familiar with this expression.

I'm glad you liked my music!

@TheMissingno. :Lords, my only criticism is the, yes the dreaded vocals. You seem to always be waiting for an opening between the guitar chords/melodies but if you could just have a constant flow of vocals with a matching backing track, it would sound pretty damn professional.

Trust and Defeat, very good, only criticism is ..... No awesome guitar solo? ._.

@Mr. Suncake: You're absolutely right about the vocals in my earlier songs. I'm still trying to get better at putting vocals to songs. The vocal melodies in my later songs are a bit more complex.