Thread: Starting a Pokemon story series, but need some advice

Gah! I forgot one other thing, as well. Jake's Pokemon. Since he's very Paul-like (although more physically abusive than Paul), I want him to seek out only the most powerful Pokemon in the region. I'm trying to decided on what Pokemon he would be best with. I've already got half of his team down, but I'm still stuck on some. I'm also making him a veteran Trainer, so Pokemon from other Regions are allowed. So far, I've got Torterra (starter), Chimchar (later released), Mamoswine, and Honchkrow. I need a few recommendations though. I was thinking of Electivire, Scizor, Drapion, Houndoom, Gyarados, and Rhyperior as either main team or reserves, but I'm still thinking. Any other ideas? Again, outside regional Pokemon are allowed, but I'm not sure what Pokemon would be "brutal" and "powerful" enough for him.

EDIT: Sorry to keep asking, but I've never been good as assembling a Pokemon team outside of the games (sometimes even in the games), especially for such a callous character. Not to mention this is my first Pokemon story, so I'm still learning some of the rules and styles of it. Thanks again.

How about a Sharpedo? I don't know what's more brutal and powerful looking than a shark. On that note, Garchomp is also a good candidate. Garchomp is straight-up scary. Also perhaps Cacturne, Aggron, Krookodile or Zangoose?

I have to say that I like the idea of this story. I see so many "we have to save the world!/take down team X!/Form a rebellion!/Survive in a dystopian world!" stories in the pokemon fandom, but what I really like is just the kid going through his pokemon journey, like the original anime and games. My only thought is to try not to make it too hardcore/violent/dramatic. People seem to think it adds levity and interest to their story, and to a point is does, but I tend to find such stories to be so depressing that I honestly stop caring about what happens and stop reading altogether. It definitely doesn't make a story unique, either.

Also it might be better to have your main character and his first pokemon have to struggle with something for a bit instead of becoming instant friends. Makes things more realistic/interesting, and it is also more like the anime, since that's what you seem to be going for. Perhaps the ralts has trouble trusting people since it was a test subject, so it takes the first episode/chapter for the ralts to trust the trainer and from then on they are besties? Its a thought. In slice-of-life type stories its really the character interaction that becomes the focal point, rather than coming up with more bad things to happen to your character.

Sharpedo, Aggron, and Cacturne are all good ideas. I had thought of Aggron, but thought I was going too far down Paul's choices. I can't give him Garchomp, though. While it is outright scary (yet so cool), I already had a Garchomp planned for Geo (plus I don't like the idea of a such a cool Mon in the hands of such a person, since Jake can be very cruel). While giving Jake a pseudo-legendary is a good idea, I would probably go more for a Tyrannitar, due to its more aggressive nature (plus I can envision him more with Tyrannitar, since they'd fit better, IMO). But your ideas are top-notch, especially since I'm still ironing out some details.

As for violence and such, it's not gonna be that brutal. Again, the story will probably be more or less rated Teen. The only real "mature" scene will be much, much later (sex, basically), and it'll barely be a chapter long, but it will be labeled appropriately. As for Jake, even though he's cruel, and many of his Pokemon will reflect this, he's not outright evil. Kinda more like a mcuh darker anti-hero. He's only really cruel to his Chimchar, and to other "weak" or "useless" Pokemon he catches (though out of all of them, Chimchar lasts the longest), though his Honchkrow and Scizor will get some lip as well. Basically, like Paul was Ash's polar opposite, Jake is Geo's polar opposite (although to a higher degree). Even Cynthia, who will appear regularly after a certain point, dubs him as "cruel", and she's hardly a judgmental person. But I appreciate your ideas and your opinions, as they do help in guiding me down the right path. So I will keep in mind your ideas and what you said about hardcore violence and stuff. I don't have much of a stomach for that, either. But thanks again for your help. Now I have an even better idea on how to pave this story out. ^_^

Okay, I finally got a motto for Team Galactic's Vivi, Victor, and Weavile. Tell me what you guys think of it. They haven't been introduced yet to the story, so it gives me a bit of time to tweak anything I need first. Here it is... at least as a first draft.

Vivi: From the depths of space we arrive.
Victor: Crushing all of you Earthlings so that we may thrive.
Weavile: Trust me, you can't survive!
Vivi: Soaring the cosmos day and night.
Victor: Banishing the goodness of justice and right.
Vivi: The shining beauty Vivi!
Victor: The radiant warrior Victor!
Weavile: Weavile is the clincher!
Vivi: Team Galactic rockets into the future with a blinding light!
Victor: If you don't believe us, then come face our might!
All: So time to surrender or be ready to fight!

EDIT: I updated the motto. Now it reads and flows better.

Can the Weavile talk?

Also I think the lines "We will extend out power to the stars above/Conquering everything from Pluto to Mars," are unneeded. Team Rockets motto doesn't have the extra couplet, and those lines don't rhyme like the other lines do. Really good though! Way better than I could do.

Originally Posted by NoirGrimoir

Can the Weavile talk?

Weavile is the story's version of TR's Meowth, so he has the ability to talk. Unlike Meowth, however, it didn't cost him his battling ability (at least, not to the same degree). He's still rather incompetent in battle, as he can be easily beaten in later chapters, but proves to be a bigger threat initially. However, as I said before, he, like Vivi and Victor's names, symbolizes irony. He appears powerful (a fully-evolved Pokemon), but is in fact not as strong as he seems, thereby his only real "strength" (other than talking) it to seem impressive, but once you get past that, he's easy. He does have some decent moves under his belt, like Shadow Ball, making him a moderate threat, but as Geo and the others soon discover, his only real threat when you first me him. He is, however, smart and cunning, and is pretty much the brains of the trio, but still isn't good at adapting to surprise situations (i.e. Lora evolving for the first time and using her soon-to-be-patented signature combo attack). But he's basically Meowth reincarnated, but a smarter and stronger, but still no less incompetent than his feline inspiration.

Anyway, thanks for the feedback on the motto. Since I haven't introduced them yet, I still have time to fine-tune everything (like in the games, Team Galactic will be introduced in Jubilife City, still a chapter or two away). Yeah, I agree with you. After reading it over again, those lines did seem out of place. They'll most likely be removed in the final version. But I appreciate the feedback, as doing a motto is new for me (even though I've been listening to TR's mottoes for years, I'm not very good at rhyming creatively like this). But I'm glad the motto is (mostly) a success. Hopefully, like with TR, I can re-adapt the motto a bit to various situations in the story series, but we'll see how that turns out. Thanks again.

Okay, I've gotten the first four chapters finished, though I'm still proof-reading the fourth. I need to know... would any of you want me to post it here on the forums? If so, would you be interested in it? This will be the first time I've posted a story like this on the internet since my days on fanfiction.net many years ago, so I'm a bit nervous. Let me know if you'd like to see what I've been working on and we'll see from there. Thanks in advance.

Originally Posted by CynthiaLover

Okay, I've gotten the first four chapters finished, though I'm still proof-reading the fourth. I need to know... would any of you want me to post it here on the forums? If so, would you be interested in it? This will be the first time I've posted a story like this on the internet since my days on fanfiction.net many years ago, so I'm a bit nervous. Let me know if you'd like to see what I've been working on and we'll see from there. Thanks in advance.

It seems like the story formula will be nearly directly the same to the anime.

......................................................... Thank you for shooting down all my confidence I had gathered in 10 years with one fell swoop. Blunt and to the point. Thank you... you've been a big help.

Originally Posted by CynthiaLover

......................................................... Thank you for shooting down all my confidence I had gathered in 10 years with one fell swoop. Blunt and to the point. Thank you... you've been a big help.

Hey, don't be like that. I'm just saying, and please don't take this to the heart, but there are many many fics. out there that are basically game play throughs in fic. form and many that are directly similar to the anime. The thing is, a lot of people don't really want cliche plots. You're including TR stand-ins, a Meowth stand-in, a Paul stand-in, and person very similar to Ash. People will liken your fic. to the anime at some points and the thing is people usually want something original and different from the norm. Take for example Legacy's fic, Pocket Monsters, it's really a break from the usual game formula. Do not take this the wrong way, you should still go for it.

Still, a bit late. If you had explained it this way earlier, then my confidence wouldn't be shot. And just so you know, I take everything to heart, as it's the way I've become after 10+ years of physical and mental abuse I've received from others. Is it any wonder I tend to keep to myself?

But... I'll think about it if more people are willing to give me feedback. Just not the same way it was dealt today. Constructive is fine, flat-out blunt is not, as I don't take it well.

"There's nothing new under the sun" is a saying for a reason. I wouldn't worry about being cliche or original. People try way to hard to be 'original' and in doing so usually wind up unoriginal or with something that's all style and no substance. What's important in a story is what you put into it. Even if a story has been told before, it hasn't been told by you before, so I say write it anyway. Besides, people like the anime and the games. I think it makes sense to write something that is similar to the source material. Just try to make sure your characters have their own lessons to learn from the story, and there's no way it can be a re-tread. Personally, I find it really annoying that people always try to insert 'their own' interpretation of pokemon into their stories. Just a regular trainer doing regular trainer things is what I like to read about. Why does the world always have to be in danger and whatnot? Personally that's much more difficult to buy into than something more normal happening to a given character. Character emotions and relationships are what i like to see in a story, not a 'cool new spin on pokemon'. Pokemon is cool as it is, it doesn't need re-interpretation.

Yeah, it's like all the people who bash The Hunger Games for being so similar to Battle Royale...

I'm not really speaking for the quality of THG, because I don't really want to start anything here, but while the two may be similar in plot, they both say different things and deal with different (though occasionally overlapping) issues. So I really don't have a problem with the plots.

Originally Posted by Prof. Lugion

Yeah, it's like all the people who bash The Hunger Games for being so similar to Battle Royale...

I've never heard of that, but I have heard that it was similar due to the whole "fight to the death" part. While I don't bash it, I don't understand why people gush over it. I tried to read through the first five chapters and my brain just bricked. I barely managed to skim through it before putting it back in its position at the bookstore. But I suppose it's just people's preferences.

Originally Posted by CynthiaLover

Still, a bit late. If you had explained it this way earlier, then my confidence wouldn't be shot. And just so you know, I take everything to heart, as it's the way I've become after 10+ years of physical and mental abuse I've received from others. Is it any wonder I tend to keep to myself?

But... I'll think about it if more people are willing to give me feedback. Just not the same way it was dealt today. Constructive is fine, flat-out blunt is not, as I don't take it well.

People enjoy the anime, and if you do too and want to write something similar in fic form, go for it! Like NoirGrimoir said, no need to worry about trying too hard to be original. Just write and do your best. I would rather read an anime fic with a less than original format but is well written than something that tries to reinvent the wheel but isn't compelling.

Do what you enjoy! Keep it up :)