Originally posted by Mew2Too Yes, it is generally frowned upon to get under-descriptive. However, there is such a thing as being over-descriptive. Try, if you can, to describe the character as briefly as possible. After all, if you say, "[Character] had blonde, spikey hair," there is not much room for debate on what kind of hair said character has. Yet, I'd suggest not being underdescriptive.
Agreed. Underdescriptive = bad AND the same can be said of overdescriptive, especially when you halt the action for an uninterupted page of description. Don't say stupid things like, "The trainer wore a shirt." Unless the character wasn't wearing a shirt in the last scene, and you're denoting he put one on in this scene, then try to get more descriptive. Is it a sweater? Is it a polo shirt? Is it a T-shirt, and is there anything unusual about it? What color is it? Once again, is the character wearing any shirt at all? Is the said character a girl not wearing a shirt, going topless because this is a lemon? What color panties are being worn by said character...
LoL at the last two lines. Generally speaking, you can even skip mentioning the clothes, except for unusual features about them (say, if a character wears a dramatic-looking, flowing black cloak, you *should* point that out. On the other hand ,that the character is wearing a shirt should be unremarkalbe.,
Unless, of course, there is something remarkable about the shirt - say, a crimson R on a white or black background. Don't shy away from the classic "he said, she said," format. Use it when it is appropriate, but don't use it in place of such old classics as "he/she asked, he/she croaked, he/she bellowed..." For God's sake, don't use, "He ejaculated," or "He jerked out." Trying to come up with too fancy a way to say, "he said/she said," can get as ugly as being repetitive with the phrase.
DO shy away from the constant he/she use, though. And sometime, when it's obvious who said what, there's no need for the "he said" to be backed in.
"Kasumi turned toward Satoshi, fear in her eyes.
'We're lost, aren't we?'
'No, we aren't. I'm just not quite sure of our current location.'"
In there it's obviously who says what, adding the he/she said et al would only make for some burdensome reading. Only use the he/she said when it'S neded to clear up who's talking.
Also, one way to get around using he/she said is to have the character does something else as they speak..
"'We're lost, aren't we?' Kasumi turned toward Satoshi, eyes wide with fear.
'Uh, no...' Satoshi fidgeted. 'I'm just not quit esure of our current location.'"
" That doesn't mean you should leave out legendary starters entirely. I would leave out Mewtwo, if I were you. Try to avoid Mew, as well. But, what is so wrong with a trainer starting off with a baby version of a Lugia or Raikou? Nothing, really. We saw in the Lugia saga in Master Quest that the Lugia baby was definitely not as strong as an adult Lugia. The Celebi are another example of Pokemon that clearly aren't all-powerful in their younger stages. If you want to make it really good, don't forget to play on a baby legendary's weaknesses. For example, what would a Houndoom do to a baby Celebi? I think we both know the answer. What would an Electabuzz do to a baby Lugia? Do I even have to tell you?
Not agreed on basic advice. As murg noted, once you know the rules, break them, but be careful about it. But I think "no legendary" is a good basic rule to get people to understand the principle of no overpowered pokemon. Anyway, I would suggest avoiding the whole "Professor" thing. That old-fashioned "Professor gave me a Pokie" thing is old.
But as it is the basic of the pokemon fandom, I'd say it'S perfectly legitimate. Of course, the professor might have certain reasons to give you a pokemon other than you being an aspiring trainer (remember, in both the first three games he has a reason to give you a pokemon : in RBY, because you are about to venture outside without one and there are wild pokemon out there ; in GSC, because he wants you to have the protection while you run an errand for him, and in RS because he needs you to save him)
Remember, thus, that professors do *NOT* give out pokemon to new trainers on a regular basis game-wise (also Murg, side note on the starter : easy availability doesn't seem to be the point, at least not in the game : Oak clearly state the three pokemon he offers are the three he has left from his training career, for example (and he only gives two ; one to you for the reasons mentioned before, and one to his own grandson. Similarly, Elm only gives one (the other is stolen) and Odamaki gives one to you to save him and one to his daughter/son ; that's all). In JTC, my first Pokemon was Vulpix. My grandfather, a Pokemon prof, didn't give him to me. My character lives in New Bark Town, but Vulpix wasn't given to me by Professor Elm. I went to Pallet after, and Oak helped Vulpix recover from a battle, but he did not give me Vulpix. Where did Vulpix come from? He was an orphaned cub in a patch of woods. I found him, helped him defeat some rabid Golbat, and so he came with me.
That'S one way to do it, but not necessarily better nor worse than the professor one. Though I would probably have a "veteran trainer" (as the game imply) instead of a professor (anime-style) giving it out. If you're going to have a legendary following you around - say, Mewtwo - try to avoid match battles with him. Do really think Mewtwo is going to jump in and help you fight trainer X like a good wittle Pikachu would? Doubtful. Mewtwo is more likely to fight human beings than other Pokemon. If you say, "Mewtwo, get in there and fight Pornstar Jenna's Jynx with a Psychic attack," do you know what Mewtwo would say? Well, I'll let Mewtwo tell you.
: What? Humiliate myself by supplicating to your selfish desires? You may kiss my...
Okay, Mewtwo, that's enough! Now, if you were helping Mewtwo fend off intruders in Paradise Canyon...
You: Mewtwo, I think you should kick this guy's @$$!
: Yes, human! You are correct. This slime has come against me, and now he shall fall!
Agreed generally. Unless the pokemon has extreme loyalty toward its trainer for some reason (*coughLatiasandAshexamplefromabovecough*), a legendary isn't going to go around fighting random fights for his trainer. I have been told that it is a bad idea to use yourself as a main character. This may be true, but not always. Sometimes, it is better to put yourself into a character than writing an empty character that you have no attachment to.
It'S a great risk to take. We tend to portray ourselves as too perfect when we are set as characters, so... Try to keep yourself in check when writing a character based on yourself, though. The anti-autoficcers would tell you this is just as big a sin, but I see nothing wrong with making a character who is you - but more like what you aspire to be.
That'S the whole problem. We ASPIRE to have qualities we don'T have. So what you actually write isn't how you would react in a situation, it'S how you would WANT to react in the situation.
Which is the danger of "autofic" as youc all them : they make for too-perfect main characters. I hereby refuse to use "self-insertion," to describe a fic with one's self as the main char. I care to use "self-insertion" to describe said fiction as much as I would care to use "cockgobbler" to describe a dish of chicken and turkey.
SI applies more to story where you insert yourself in the main contunuity (IE : Random trainer Bob and his friends meets and join with Ash and co for no real good reason other than the author want to be part of Ash's adventure. Subsequently Bob becomes the great hero replacing Ash who *should* be the focus point) Also, it is taboo, in Pokemon fiction, to refer to real human history unless the story takes place in this world. I have been told to change names and places to avoid this. That doesn't exactly work for me, but maybe it would for you. Try to change real events slightly - give them a twist - if you're going to use them as a template.
*shrugs* There are lots of way there. It's obvious that if, in your mind, the pokemon world is another totaly unrelated to ours, they won't know about our history, for example. Also, be a little more discerning about the names you change. Don't just change them, change them well. Don't write a Pokemon military story where Surge and crew have been dispatched by "President Mush" to fight "Musama min Madden" and "Guddam Gussein." ( That is, unless it's a comedy. )
Obviously. Better yet, don't just change the name, change the events somewhat too. It's boring to have just changed names around. Try not to incorporate direct relgious ideas into a story. Don't have Jesus Christ training an Espeon, in other words. ( Once again, unless it's a comedy. )
Not quite agreed, but I will stay silent as to the why... (Well, of course Jesus training an Espeon is a bit out of the whack, but...well, as I said, you'll eventually see why my caveat about incorporating religious ideas is there) Instead, incorporate some basic religious ideas into your story. Feel free to mix and match. Does your character remind you of a religious figure? Is he a little bit like him? Believe me, I could go on for hours about fictitious characters that I believe are based on Jesus alone. (Vash the Stampede, Aragorn the Strider, etc.)
Heh. Well, of course that's an obvious on, and I know at least one character I'm writing about who's very much based on Jesus, at least on some points. Some people will tell you not to use Satoshi/Ash and gang in your stories. I would advise the same. This goes especially if you're writing about the Japanese show, know what the hell you're talking about, and write a story about. I mean, if you write a story, say, about Kasumi returning and training Haruka, and then start having all the characters talk very unlike what dub-grubbers are used to, then...
Ah! Never mind! Just trust me from personal experience. Peeps, unless your writing a shippy fic, don't write Satoshi-tachi stories. You won't get many reads if you do.
Remind me what'S just about the most legendary, mythical fic of the pokemon fandom?
That'S right. Pokemon Master. An Ash-tachi story.
And remind me what's FAR AND WIDE the most popular "long" fic on this board?
The Greater Evil, with 231 posts more than its closest rival (your own JTC). Another Ash story.
In the history of TPM, there were both non-Ash and Ash stories among the very popular one ; the older version of The Greater Evil and Twistes Paths, Forgotten Pasts by Timarelay would be example of the later.
I rest my case. Of course, does that matter? You should be writing, not for the approval of the masses, but for your own satisfaction. Once it starts becoming only about compromising the flavor of your vision to please the taste-buds of the readers, then you're through. You must understand, these are just guidelines that we lay out. If you think you have a better idea that could attract more readers, than for God's sake - do it! Remember, though, you should be telling a story - one that you like!
Just think of it this way - you have to keep the story alive in your heart before it becomes interesting. It helps to think, "Wow! This story really happened somewhere! I'm just typing it out for everyone to enjoy!"
Yep, thinking it Tolkien-style is nice. [/B]