Thread: Corrupt a Wish v2

Granted, you are then killed by a rival ninja clan.

I wish I was baka.

Granted. You are so baka, you can't get a job because no matter how someone explains it, you don't know how to do anything useful. It's a miracle you know how to breathe. Or don't you?

It seems you haven't made a wish. Oh well! Less work for me! *evil laugh*

I wish I could read minds.

Granted but you see everything and die from shock
I wish Pokemon was real

Granted. You never wake up 'cause of Darkrai.

I wish I were omniscient.

Granted. Your human brain cannot hold all that knowledge, and so it shuts itself down.

I wish Jeremy Kyle was cancelled.

Granted, but then is long lost twin takes on the role
I wish Fox news was actually news

Granted it goes it off air
I wish I was fat.

Granted, you're so fat you can't move anywhere or act independently, bed-bound for the rest of your life.

I wish pigs could fly.

Granted, and one flies right into your face, and it causes brain damage.

I wish my plan would work.

Granted. However, due to your vile plan, you would be charged with a dozen or so crimes.

I wish the TV show Wipeout was discontinued. (The show is so facepalm-worthy!)

Granted, but an even worse show replaces it.

I wish that... wait, what was I gonna wish for?

Granted! Since you left room for me to improvise, your wish is now "I wish I had the power to turn everything I touch into gold"! Enjoy that.

I wish for a glass of water.

Granted, but its saltwater.

I wish I had lots of money.

Granted, you have lots of Monopoly money.

I wish I had my own planet.