Twins of Fate: On The Run (Book 1) - Page 9

View Poll Results: What are your thoughts about this story?

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  • Great

    9 42.86%
  • Good

    6 28.57%
  • Okay

    4 19.05%
  • Bad needs work

    2 9.52%
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Thread: Twins of Fate: On The Run (Book 1)

  1. #121
    Woof Thabet's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Does it matter?
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    Default Re: Twins of Fate: On The Run (Book 1)

    I'm pretty high up there aren't I?
    Thank you Zekurom! I really do value your opinion.

  2. #122
    ◓Gypsy Vanner Horse Kyuuketsuki's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    The Old World.
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    Default Re: Twins of Fate: On The Run (Book 1)

    Alright, I just finished this story.

    It had an interesting but slow start, and you improved a lot from the first to the last chapter. A few things I found bad were the lack of description in some scenes, and the scattered grammar and spelling mistakes. You also seemed to jump from one scene to the other too quickly, and it was a little better towards the end.

    The characters were not that interesting, to me. Thabet seemed too generic for me, while Guillotine came across as overly-sadastic. They both followed some generic routes in terms of characters and roles.

    But regarding the story overall, the premise is good. The writing could have been better. But what really matters is how much you improved throughout the chapters. I might go and check out the sequel someday. Keep it up.

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