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  1. #661
    Let's get funky! Gama's Avatar Former Head Administrator
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Alright, I'm finally back home so I'm gonna reply to all the messages I ignored while I was away now. I'll post the new chapter later today, so watch this space!

    Quote Originally Posted by Legacy View Post
    Wow. Agatha's character and the persona you created is simply amazing. Seriously, a joy to read. I follow this fic, but don't often post, but I just had to say something after this chapter. Masterful.
    Wow. Thank you very much, that's great to hear!

    Quote Originally Posted by Yumega View Post
    Simply great. I'm a person who useually goes with the bad guys and now I love Agatha, what a witch she is. You have made Blue and Agatha alike in many ways and it's awesome. XD you should have a chapter for each of Red's Pokémon...
    You think they're similar? Interesting. Perhaps one day, Blue (like Koga) will be promoted from Gym Leader to Elite Four and will actually be in the same position as Agatha. We'll never know though, will we?


    Quote Originally Posted by Marik Ishtar View Post
    I like the idea of Lance being creepy, and hope that there's some sort of backstory as to his and Professor Oak's relationship. All in all, a great chapter! Something tells me it's going to end up Charizard vs. Charizard.
    I suggest you check out Lance's team in RBYFRLG because I think you're getting it confused with GSCHGSS =P

    Quote Originally Posted by BlueNostalgia View Post
    i'm just reading through the whole fic now, I've jumped on the wagon rather late it would appear :S

    loving it though, it's amazing

    just read chapter 63, I laughed so hard a the Wombles reference
    I'm glad you like it and thanks for catching up! (In reply to your later comment)

    Quote Originally Posted by The_Noob View Post
    Sweet chapter, G-Mama. Something tells me, since Blue only has two Pokemon left to fight, that there will be no Champion, just an empty room waiting for him to claim. Just guessing.
    Huh, I like G-Mama, it works. And that guess sounds like a good one.

    Quote Originally Posted by AceTrainer14 View Post
    I am continuing to like your portrayal of Lance. He seems very mischevious and villianous, and there is definitley something dark there in his past with Oak, so I am going to be interested to see it. Also, I loved the video game remark, I laughed out loud at that :P
    Good to hear it! Sadly, Lance's backstory that is hinted at during his battle with Blue won't be fully explained until Dragon Days, my next fic, comes out. That's right - they're in the same world (props to Instrutilus for that idea)



    Anyway, as I said, I just need to finish writing today's chapter and I'll post it later.

  2. #662
    BF Author alster08's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    So are we reaching the final twelve chapters?

  3. #663
    Epic Sea Otter ftw Yumega's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Gastly's Mama View Post

    You think they're similar? Interesting. Perhaps one day, Blue (like Koga) will be promoted from Gym Leader to Elite Four and will actually be in the same position as Agatha. We'll never know though, will we?
    You mean you don't? Both of them are really stuborn. Using Toxic like that was exsactly what I would imagine Blue doing; plus, both preform most actions because of their pride.



    ^Credit for thumbnails goes to Instrutilus!^

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    Let's Player Derier44's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Yes! Can't wait, I wana see how blue pwns Lance!

    Winner of: Inazuma Eleven Mafia, FALCONWING 3 MAFIA, War Room Mafia 2,
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  5. #665
    Moderator AceTrainer14's Avatar Forum Head
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Interesting how you are setting the stories in the same world. Practically every single one of my Pokemon stories are set in the same world as each other. Is Roots in this world as well?

  6. #666
    Let's get funky! Gama's Avatar Former Head Administrator
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Quote Originally Posted by alster08 View Post
    So are we reaching the final twelve chapters?
    I think I can end Rival's Story in an even 100 chapters, so, yes, we are.

    Quote Originally Posted by Yumega View Post
    You mean you don't? Both of them are really stuborn. Using Toxic like that was exsactly what I would imagine Blue doing; plus, both preform most actions because of their pride.
    Oh, I wasn't disagreeing, I just hadn't noticed until you pointed it out. I think you're exactly right thinking over it!

    Quote Originally Posted by AceTrainer14 View Post
    Interesting how you are setting the stories in the same world. Practically every single one of my Pokemon stories are set in the same world as each other. Is Roots in this world as well?
    No, none of my stories are set in the same world except for Rival's Story and Dragon Days - I like to work with a blank canvas. I don't consider the characters of Oak to be at all similar in RS/DD (dubbed the 'Rivalsverse' by Instrutilus) and Roots.

    Anyway, as promised, here is the next chapter! I hope you enjoy it!

    Chapter 89

    If there was one thing Blue had learnt in his journey so far it was that when you’re up against someone who you appear to have an advantage against, you probably don’t. In fact, they probably have an advantage of their own that you don’t know about and the fact that you don’t know about their advantage but they know about yours makes theirs that much better – so basically, they have the advantage. Right now, Blue was in one of those positions. Blue knew that Aerodactyl was dual type Rock and Flying and that Flying types were weak against Rock typed moves and Rock types had no particular resistance. That meant that Rhydon’s Rock Blast would be super effective against Aerodactyl while Aerodactyl’s moves would probably mostly be Flying and Rock type and therefore ineffective against Rhydon. It just seemed too good to be true.

    Still, Blue decided to use Rhydon – it seemed like it would be Blue’s best chance against Aerodactyl, so he retreated Charizard to its Poké Ball and sent out the stone rhinoceros. In fact, if all of his Pokémon had still been conscious, Rhydon would probably still have been the one that Blue would have chosen to face off against Aerodactyl. Lance smiled at Blue’s resilience.

    “This should be a good battle,” commented the leader of the Elite Four, “Aerodactyl, Scary Face!”

    Blue had never heard of the move Scary Face before – it sounded completely useless. Why on earth would the best trainer in Kanto get his Pokémon to try and scare its opponent? Very few Pokémon manage to knock out their opponents using sheer terror. Although Blue had anticipated Aerodactyl to have some sort of unexpected advantage against Rhydon, he decided to use his head and just order the most logical move anyway – he was sure the one time he tried to anticipate the unexpected would be the one time his opponent moved in a completely predictable way.

    “Rock Blast!” commanded Blue fiercely.

    Rhydon fired three large rocks at its opponent which seemed to do a large amount of damage. In fact, they probably took away more than half of Aerodactyl’s full health, meaning that one more hit like that would be enough to completely take Aerodactyl out. There was still plenty of scope for something to go wrong though – Rhydon was on little more than half of its maximum health itself and, thanks to Blue’s grandmother’s pathetic spite, was also poisoned. If Aerodactyl somehow managed to avoid another Rock Blast from Rhydon for any amount of time, it was wholly possible that Aerodactyl would win this face off. In fact, if Rhydon’s next Rock Blast happened to only consist of two hits, even that might not be enough for Rhydon to come out on top and if Rhydon didn’t come out on top, Blue doubted that Charizard, his last remaining Pokémon would be able to take out Lance’s Aerodactyl, Dragonair and his last mystery Pokémon all by itself. Rhydon absolutely had to win.

    Aerodactyl glared at Rhydon threateningly, evidently carrying out the requested Scary Face manoeuvre and Blue smiled confidently – he was sure that a look as simple as that wouldn’t do anything to his mighty Rhydon. But as Blue looked at Rhydon, he saw a tinge of fear enter into its eyes and it began to move with a bit of hesitation. Could that really have been the whole purpose of the move? To make Rhydon doubt itself?

    “Rock Blast!” cried Blue, trying to get these worries out of his head.

    “Out of the way and hit back with a Wing Attack, Aerodactyl!” commanded Lance.

    Blue highly doubted that Aerodactyl would be able to both avoid Rhydon’s attack and hit it with a Wing Attack – it may have been able to do one or the other, but there was no way it was fast enough to do both. The speed it would’ve had to move at to be able to dodge Rhydon’s attack while accurately executing its own would’ve been impossibly fast.

    Blue stood open mouthed as he saw Lance’s fantastical orders realised, without Aerodactyl defying the laws of physics. Rhydon’s fear carried through into its execution of the attacks Blue had ordered of it and in the end, Aerodactyl had been able to dodge it and land a Wing Attack with relative ease.

    “Scary Face reduces speed,” explained Lance with a smirk.

    The Dragon Master had a huge smile on his face, he looked as if he was enjoying this battle to a bizarre degree, Blue couldn’t help but wonder how he knew Oak and why his grandfather would’ve given this strange man an Aerodactyl. Blue shook his head, determined to stay focused on the battle and thought about what to do next. Aerodactyl’s Wing Attack hadn’t done much damage because Rhydon resisted it but it had done some damage and along with the poison from Agatha’s Golbat and the other damage Rhydon had already taken, the rock behemoth was starting to get down to very low health indeed. Blue thought about his options, but in the end he realised all he could do was hope for the best.

    “Rock Blast again, Rhydon!” yelled Blue, “I know you can do it!”

    “Same again, Aerodactyl!” snapped Lance.

    Blue looked Lance in the eye and recognised an insatiable hunger behind them, the man was desperate to win this battle – it was as if the one thing he cared about was battling, it was obvious it was everything to him. Blue then looked to Aerodactyl, expecting to see a maltreated Pokémon but it didn’t have the look of one – it didn’t look anything like Red’s Eevee, it reminded him more of Maxwell’s Wartortle – complete and utter devotion to its trainer. Blue admired Lance’s combination of complete obsession over battling and care for his Pokémon, he didn’t think such a mix was possible.

    Rhydon’s health was waning, Blue was sure that if it did not manage to knock Aerodactyl out this time – all was lost. Between another Wing Attack and the lingering poison from before, Rhydon would never be able to survive this turn – it absolutely had to not only hit Aerodactyl, but hit Aerodactyl at least three times. There was no way Charizard could finish this battle off by itself.

    Perhaps it was Rhydon’s desperation not to be knocked out, perhaps it was Blue’s sheer force of will filtering through to his Pokémon or perhaps it was just dumb luck but something was different this time in spite of the fact that the same trainers gave the same Pokémon the same commands. Rhydon launched its first rock at a slightly elevated angle, resulting in it moving in a less predictable way than it had before and, against all the odds, Rhydon managed to land a hit on Aerodactyl, even though it was moving much, much slower. Aerodactyl was so shocked by the fact that Rhydon had managed to land a hit that it was barely able to stay in the air – let alone dodge the second rock Rhydon blasted at it.

    Blue knew that now there was nothing he could do that could possibly affect the outcome of the battle between Aerodactyl and Rhydon. He had also noticed that although he and Lance were both excellent trainers, they were also both very different trainers. Blue doubted he had ever met someone so in the moment as Lance whereas Blue was quite calculated and thought deeply about every move that he made. Blue knew that he could use this to his advantage – while Lance was focusing intently on what was going on in the present, Blue shifted his focus to the future, to what was coming next. It wasn’t going to be easy, it was still going to be an uphill struggle after this, but if Blue concocted a plan now, he could still win.

    Blue looked back to the battle to see Lance yelling in frustration at Aerodactyl to be ready to dodge a potential third attack. Rock Blast launched two to five rocks, if Rhydon managed to launch any more than two, it’d be able to take Aerodactyl out but it was wholly possible that the attack would stop here. Blue stopped plotting and Lance stopped yelling in the moment that Rhydon braced itself to try and fire out one last Rock Blast – could it do it?

    Both trainers immediately returned to their respective tasks as a third rock whistled across the arena and knocked Aerodactyl out of the air. Blue knew that this was the time for action, he’d come up with a vague plan but he wasn’t certain it would work. Rhydon fell to the ground, overcome by the intensity of its last face off, but not quite knocked out. Blue withdrew it to its Poké Ball and instead grabbed Charizard’s.

    “You’re not done yet,” whispered Blue to Rhydon as he returned its Poké Ball to his belt.

    Blue tossed Charizard’s Poké Ball out into the arena as Lance did the same for Dragonair’s. Blue’s hands did not come off of Charizard and Rhydon’s Poké Balls.

    “Hyper Beam!” yelled Lance at the top of his voice, knowing that Blue’s semi-battered Charizard would not be able to recover from a Hyper Beam.

    Then Blue’s hands moved at an incredible speed, withdrawing Charizard back to its Poké Ball and sending out Rhydon instead. Dragonair’s intensely powerful Hyper Beam attack was wasted on knocking out Rhydon, who could’ve been knocked out by a Tackle from a Rattata. Blue continued to move as fast as he possibly could, now withdrawing Rhydon to its Poké Ball and sending Charizard back out.

    “Dragon Breath!” hissed Blue.

    Charizard hesitated for a moment, bewildered by being sent out, withdrawn and sent out again all within ten seconds and Blue’s heart sank. That second of hesitation had lost him the battle – Lance would withdraw Dragonair again, sending out his final Pokémon instead, leaving Charizard with no one to switch out to so it could avoid a second Hyper Beam.

    Strangely, Lance did not switch his Pokémon, even though he had plenty of opportunity to. Blue didn’t waste time wondering why, he just revelled in Charizard’s successful execution of the Dragon Breath technique.

    “Again!” yelled Blue, desperate not to waste precious seconds on unnecessary syllables.

    Before Dragonair had a chance to do anything about it, Charizard fired its second Dragon Breath, which was too much for the Dragon type to take and it tumbled to the ground in exhaustion. Lance withdrew it to its Poké Ball and grabbed the final Ball from his belt, sending out his last, mystery Pokémon.

    The Poké Ball exploded to reveal a Pokémon Blue didn’t know was real – the mighty Dragonite.

    “Of course,” said Lance with a maniacal grin, seeing the two fierce, draconian Pokémon squaring up to each other, “How could it not end this way?”

    Blue's Team: Charizard, Pidgeot, Exeggcute, Alakazam, Gyarados, Rhydon
    Blue’s Box: Metapod, Beedrill, Meowth, Bellsprout, Grimer, Aerodactyl
    Blue's Pokédex: 26 Caught, 98 Seen
    Blue’s Badges: 8

  7. #667
    Rocking the Lucario Thundagere's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Oh my gosh! You've heated up the tension to an amazing degree, GM! Any other words would simply be redundant, but if I had a hat, I'd tip it off to you!

    Made by Blue Dragon!

  8. #668
    Registered User RobMysterio's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Man this is really awesome & Intense... Really, really good job

  9. #669
    Soaring high Rev's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Gastly's Mama View Post
    “Of course,” said Lance with a maniacal grin, seeing the two fierce, draconian Pokémon squaring up to each other, “How could it not end this way?”
    I broke out into a massive grin when I read this.. I love the character you've given Lance, along with all of the other characters you've put a twist on - I think Bertha stands out as well on that list :).

    Great work, and I look forward to the coming chapters.
    White~1248 9177 2603~White
    Platinum~0604 5276 0111~Platinum


    ~My RNG babies and captures~

  10. #670
    Stray Dog Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    That was exciting, I mean the difference between Blue's and Lance, the suspense of Rhydon being able to knock out Aerodactyl and of course Blue's last moment switching plan was well done. Really, I'm a bit jealous even though your fic doesn't have a lot of dialogue your description makes it so great, it's enough to make a person jealous of wanting to have as much description.

  11. #671
    Moderator AceTrainer14's Avatar Forum Head
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Another brilliant battle, which had a brilliant cliffhanger! I am interested to see what our hero does next, but I have a feeling Charizard will learn a new move simply to defeat Dragonite

  12. #672
    Pinnacle of Life Kars's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    i dont normally like fan stuff but this is truly amazing

  13. #673
    BF Author alster08's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Ill do the count down
    11 Chapters to go!

  14. #674
    追放されたバカ
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    Daaang that was epic!

  15. #675
    Epic Sea Otter ftw Yumega's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rival's Story

    That... was fabulous.
    I can't believe Blue cheated though :O Sneaky Boy, that's exactly like him though...
    Take Dragonite out, Blue.



    ^Credit for thumbnails goes to Instrutilus!^

    -Pokémon Rescue Team Series-
    Eternal Flame: Coming Soon!

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