Pokemon New Generation: New Beginnings (Finished) - Page 10

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  1. #136
    Reader and Writer Legacy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Another good chapter GH! It's not a big deal but you're forgetting to punctuate after the quotations, but I'm only nitpicking...it's awesome besides that.

  2. #137
    The Dimension Wizard Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Thanks, also I came up with a theme song for the fic and a theme song for Ashian himself

  3. #138
    Finalize! Black Ace! LightShadow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    A good chapter, I have nothing to correct you on, except the punctuation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Legacy View Post
    It's not a big deal but you're forgetting to punctuate after the quotations.
    I wouldn't say that it's not a big deal, but it's not a little deal either. Punctuation is a part of good grammar.

    ------------------------------

    And there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. The great dragon was hurled down―that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.
    Revelation 12:7-9

  4. #139
    The Dimension Wizard Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    I never really did the punctutation after quotations, I just don't get why that should be done. But thanks

  5. #140
    Finalize! Black Ace! LightShadow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Quote Originally Posted by Golden Hero View Post
    I never really did the punctutation after quotations, I just don't get why that should be done. But thanks
    The punctuation shows where the person who is talking finished a sentence.

    ------------------------------

    And there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. The great dragon was hurled down―that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.
    Revelation 12:7-9

  6. #141
    The Dimension Wizard Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Oh...thanks for telling me

  7. #142
    Reader and Writer Legacy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    when is the next chapter?

  8. #143
    The Dimension Wizard Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Probably tommorow if I'm lucky, I'm still trying to figure out the battles for the next one, since it's mostly about battles I'm still figuring strategies out and I wanna have some chapters saved up so I'm also doing the chapter that comes after this one

  9. #144
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Nice!

  10. #145
    The Dimension Wizard Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Here it is, two weeks after the last chapter which ended up in a dramatic ending, it's time for the new arc the Dancing with My Friends Arc (Dancing with the Stars was going on when I thought of this name so don't blame me)this arc will have more character development, especilly for Alexa as she has to decide wether to do what her mom tells her too or take her own path whcih will also affect a certain Ashian.



    The stars were twinkling over the lights of the now approaching Celadon City. After travelling for three straight days, Ashian and his friends are on the Outskirts of Celadon City waiting for morning to appear in the sky. Ashian was sitting over a rock; it was his turn to keep watch while his friends slept in the cave.

    He felt his head tilt back but immediately got himself back up; even if he let himself fall sleep he would wake up as soon as he fell. Actually he hadn’t gotten any sleep in the last three days, after Alexa told him that she would be leaving after they cross Celadon.

    “It’s just not fair” Ashian gritted his teeth as he stared at the stars, whatever was about to happen, sure wasn’t something good. “Tomorrow’s my gymbattle, I still haven’t thought what combination I should use, Charmeleon’s the perfect choice, but if it loses what else can I use?” Ashian asked himself scratching his chin.

    He looked down at his red vest. Brandon sent them a set of new cloth, mostly to show they were his apprentices. Ashian got a copy of his best, except it had the Brave Symbol on the left side and on the back of the vest. Henry got an exact copy of Brandon’s jacket; except his decided to wear it open, the jacket also had the symbol as buttons. And Alexa got a new hat with the same symbol, and a pair of fingerless gloves.

    “I just hope Brandon’s training helped me out” Ashian looked down and sighed; ever since he left Vermilion he has been on a losing streak and he hoped Brandon’s training would change that.

    He felt his eyes closing again and rested his head on the rock wall. Henry walked out, already wearing his jacket. “Hey wake up.” He shook Ashian and woke him up a few seconds after.

    “Thanks dude,” Ashian patted his head; even thought he was comfortable the pain of crashing his head with the wall still hurt. “I can keep going.” Ashian got up and slapped himself on the face twice.

    “No you can’t,” Henry shook his head letting Ashian go inside the cave. “I’ll take your shift, don’t worry about waking them up, those two girls are really heavy sleepers” Henry laughed. “Plus, you have to get ready for tomorrow; you need to have a goodnight sleep.” With that, Ashian left for his slumber.


    The next morning Ashian finished passing his hand through his hair and started walking out of the cave, Moana, Alexa and Henry were already out finishing their breakfast; since Henry slept he didn’t fell sleep during his shift, and Moana and Alexa slept through the whole night.

    “Morning,” he said in a lazy tone, since he was still tired from the night before. Alexa and Moana were eating the leftover stew they had for dinner, and apparently Henry had already eaten his. “You guys couldn’t leave me anything!” he shouted and ran over to the big bowl of stew that was almost empty; Ashian pouted on the bowl, really wishing he would’ve woken up earlier.

    “Oh come on Ashian, you’re always eating everything anyways,” Moana grabbed another spoonful of stew and ate it. “Plus, with what you had for dinner last night, why would you want breakfast?”

    “Cause, today I’ll have my fifth gymbattle, I’ll need all the energy I can get, so in other words I NEED THAT STEW!!” Ashian screamed; almost waking the Pokémon that were sleeping down on the forest.

    “Calm down Ashian, we’ll buy something when we get to Celadon, so calm down,” Henry waved his hand trying to calm his friend down; Ashian took a deep breath and then nodded.

    “Well, now that Ashian has finished his daily whining session, let’s go.” Alexa got up and started walking down the mountain. Ashian couldn’t believe how much she was trying to make things normal; even though she knew she wouldn’t be there for long, but Ashian had to sympathize, he would be doing the same thing if it was him.

    As they kept walking down Moana started to talk about the gymleader. Her name was Greena and she specialized in grass type, just like her mother Erika. “So you saying it’s like a tradition?” Ashian asked.

    “Pretty much,” Alexa answered before Moana could speak, she used to reside in Celadon after all, so it’s obvious that she knew what the gymleader specialized on.

    “Well, who cares, I’m still going to get my next badge!” Ashian yelled as he was walking backwards; too bad he crashed with a tree branch while walking. “OW!” he shouted patting his head while everyone else laugh and walked over to make sure he was okay.

    “Look at the bright side, your head’s so hard, it didn’t hurt you much,” Moana said while laughing.

    “Whatever fish girl,” Ashian frowned and turned around giving Moana the cold shoulder. “Shouldn’t you get to the water before you choke?” he narrowed his eye at her.

    “Let’s just get down okay guys,” Henry sighed and the four trainers started walking down again; although Ashian was still frowning at how little attention he got; but it’s not like they ever do pay attention.


    “Wow.” Ashian kept his mouth open as he stared at the gate of Celadon; or actually the city itself. It was really big, actually bigger than any of the cities he has been seeing since he got out of Pallet. There were buildings all around the city, and people really seemed to be getting around, well mostly cars.

    There were stores at every corner, mostly perfume stores or plant shops. Which lead to another thing, the city was focused on both a modern, and a natural environment, which really made the city a peaceful place. Moana took in a deep breath and let it out with relieve. “It may be a city, but, it has a lot of fresh air,” she turned around to look at her friends.

    Henry was mostly looking around; Celadon was probably the biggest city he had been in since he started travelling with Ashian. Ashian was doing the same, that and checking out the restaurants that were around; he still remembered the fact that he didn’t have any breakfast. And Alexa, well she was just doing her best to hide; actually, she was already wearing a pair of sunglasses, and one of those big hats.

    “So where’s the gym?” Ashian turned to Alexa, he had a piece of bread hanging from his mouth. Alexa looked at him, signaling him to get the bread off.

    “It’s on the other side of the city, and can you please not talk with your mouth full!” she screamed making Ashian fall off.

    “Wow, someone is pi-ss-ed.” Ashian got up and dusted himself up. “Okay, then, let’s go people!” he yelled throwing his hand up in the air. Henry and Moana nodded, Alexa just grunted.

    “I’m not pissed ‘cause of you being a dumbass, I’m pissed cause we’re moving too slow!” She yelled, not really caring if anyone could hear her ear piercing screams. “Now, lets go, I want to get my badge before noon.” She started walking again; being followed by the others.

    “Oh come on Alexa, this place is so beautiful, why are you in such a hurry?” Moana whined as she walked next to Alexa. “Unless, you live here?” she narrowed her eyes; Ashian and Henry jumped in fear, since Ashian told Henry about Alexa being from Celadon City the night before; Moana was the only one that didn’t know.

    “You freakin tattletale,” Alexa frowned taking off her glasses to reveal her cold stare. A shiver ran down Ashian’s spine as he laughed nervously. “But, yeah, I live here and I don’t want anybody to see me, since I have my own family feud,” she looked at the other three confused trainers and turned around again. “Now, if we’re done chattering, let’s move those butts,” she started walking again; practically stomping on the ground.

    “Why do I think we’re going to have a lot of fun here,” Ash sighed with boredom; he really wanted to enjoy the visit, but with Alexa acting like a total drama queen, they couldn’t really do it.


    They were in front of the gym. It was surrounded by patches of grass and flowers, the gym looked like a giant dome; although the dome was transparent, meaning you could see the plants that they gym was decorated with. Ashian looked around, the flowers were still blossoming since they were in the middle of spring.

    “There sure are a lot of flowers here,” Ashian kept turning around as he kneeled down and smelled the flowers; it was a sweet scent actually, like if the flower were sprayed with candy or something. “Cool, this things smell great!” he yelled and was about to grab a flower, but when his hand got close something came out from the dome and flew towards him; knocking him to the floor.

    “What’s that?” Henry scratched his eyes to make sure he could see well. There was a huge plant on tope of Ashian. It looked like a Venus flytrap, it had a big green round head with spots around its face; two big eyes, it had a circular body and roots for legs, it had two long leaf like arms and long teeth that came out of its mouth.

    “What the hell is this thing!?” Ashian yelled, trying to get the Pokémon off. Alexa saw Ashian’s Pokéde-X drop to the floor and grabbed it.

    “Carnivine-the bug catcher Pokémon, this Pokémon resembles a flytrap, which helps it a lot while hunting for food since other Pokémon can normally fall for its disguise,” Alexa turned the machine off and stared as Carnivine got off Ashian.

    “Okay, now that it’s off, we just have to figure out, who’s its trainer?” Moana looked at the entrance of the gym, there was someone coming out.

    She looked at the group, she had a long blue hair, she had a pale white skin and a pair of black eyes, and she was wearing a purple sleeveless shirt, with a pair of green mini shorts. She also had a pair of sandals; which didn’t really seemed to go with the rest of the clothe. “That’s what happens when you try to grab the flowers,” she looked at Ashian sternly, like if he had just touched something sacred that would break with just a slight tap.

    “Sorry, but what’s so important about them anyways?” Ashian asked dusting himself up. The others look at him with serious faces, since they didn’t want to make the girl angrier than what she already was; Ashian wasn’t really assisting the cause.

    “This flowers bloom around this area, they’re very rare and it’s hard to get them to bloom, the flowers you just tried to touch have been taken care of for seven years now,” she walked over to the flower and got a small water sprayer, she sprayed some of the crystalline water on the flowers and got up.

    “Talk about taking care of nature” Henry said as he walked over to the flowers to get a better look at the blushing red roses that were next to the other flowers. “Do you have any orchids, I would love to see one,” he smiled and took out a manual about the most famous flowers in the world; he started flipping through pages till he got to the orchid. “They’re kinda rare, but since Celadon has a variety of flowers, they may have one, right?” he looked at her.

    She shook her head and returned her Carnivine. “My name’s Greena, and I assume that at least one of you is here for a challenge right?” she asked motioning the ones that were going to challenge her to take a step forward, Ashian and Alexa both looked at each other and stepped up. “Very well,” she smiled and looked at Alexa. “Do I know you by any chance?” she asked, walking in front of Alexa and started scratching her chin in thought.

    “It doesn’t occur to me that you have,” Alexa tried to be as calm as she could; but if Greena found out who she was, then they were busted. Ashian saw how tensed she was so he walked over, patted her back and smiled.

    “We’ve been travelling for a long time, and Alexa won the S.S. Anne Two Tournament, so maybe that’s where you’ve seen her from,” he grinned, it may have been a rushed excuse, but it was the truth.

    “I guess you’re right,” she nodded and smiled. “Okay, follow me.” She turned around and started walking crushing the soil that was on the floor; Ashian and the others followed shortly.

    The gym was really translucent, it was very well lit, probably cause of the fact they had to keep the plants alive with the light from both the sun, and the lights of the gym. “Damn it dude, I’m blind!” Ashian yelled covering his eyes from the powerful lights. “Moana is that you?” he said and started touching something; but he knew it was someone’s face.

    “Uh…Ashian that’s me,” Henry said with a serious tone, Ashian flinched and stop touching his face. “Can you see Greena anywhere?”

    “Over here guys!” they turned around after hearing Moana’s voice; thanks to her voice they managed to find their way. The next room was darker, but still full with plants; it was also well lit, but that was because of the sun.

    “Wow, is every room full of plants?” Ashian started looking around and stepped on a leaf, which was actually a Bellossom’s skirt, the Bellossom fumed and sent him flying into the field with a Razor Leaf. “Ouch,” Ashian patted his head.

    “Bellossom are very calm creatures, but if you step on their skirt, or anything for that matter, they won’t think twice before acting fierce,” she walked over to the still fumed Bellossom and petted its head. “And that’s something you must realize.”

    “Well thanks for helping anyways,” Ashian said in a sarcastic tone as he got up, not really happy that he was the one to blame for an accident.

    “Now, if we’re done with all this bickering,” Alexa pushed Ashian out of the field and walked into the right side. “Since I’m the girl, I’ll go first, so En Garde!” she took out a pokéball from her belt and assumed her battle stand. “Go Skarmory!” she yelled with all her might as her Skarmory took place in the battle.

    “Okay then, I choose you Bellossom,” the Bellossom that Ashian stepped on a few moments ago took its place in the arena; it stared at Skarmory and started throwing punches at the air. “Go, use Razor Leaf!” Bellossom danced around and started firing sharp green leafs towards Skarmory.

    “Skarmory, use Drill Peck,” Alexa threw her fist in the air as Skarmory flew up high; out of Bellossom’s reach. It started spinning around, letting out a shrieking metal sound and dove towards Bellossom.

    “Bellossom, use Magical Leaf,” Bellossom’s skirt started glowing green as it fired the leafs, Skarmory drilled through them, and managed to crash against Bellossom, sending it flying off. Skarmory flew back to its side of the field and stared at Bellossom; waiting for what it was going to do next.

    “Okay, go for a Steel Wing!” Skarmory spread its wings and they started glowing; but just when he was about to start flying towards Bellossom, it stopped in mid tracks. “Why isn’t it moving?” Alexa asked alarmed, and then she noticed that Skarmory’s body was covered with glowing yellow sparkles. “Stun Spore.”

    “That’s right; Bellossom used Stun Spore against your Skarmory when it used Drill Peck,” Greena grinned and threw her finger forward pointing at Skarmory. “Bellossom use Leaf Blade!” Greena crossed her arms as Bellossom jumped at Skarmory, its leaf skirt started glowing green, it slashed Skarmory’s metallic armor making the loud shriek of pain the only thing Skarmory could do.

    “That had to hurt,” Moana closed one eyes, trying to relate on how much Skarmory was hurting at the time. “But there’s really nothing she can do, Skarmory is paralyzed, and it looks like it’s going to be that way for a long time,” she started thinking when Henry patted her shoulder.

    “She’ll get out of there, she still has one more attack up her sleeve, well actually two more attacks up her sleeve.” He grinned and stared into the field again.

    “Go Giga Impact Bellossom!” Bellossom’s body surrounded itself with purple spinning energy, it ran at Skarmory once more and crashed against the vulture; this sent Skarmory crashing into the trees outside of the field’s range.

    Alexa couldn’t help but grin at this. “Go Skarmory, use Gyro Ball!” Skarmory flew out of the trees and bushes, it fired a ball made out of metallic energy and led its way towards Bellossom. Bellossom fired a Solar Beam that it had been charging in secrecy, both attacks crashed and the Solar Beam overcame the Gyro Ball.

    “Skarmory, now use Metal Crash!” Alexa took her chance and Skarmory’s body got covered with metallic energy. Skarmory started diving, cutting the air with a metallic sound.

    “Bellossom, use Leaf Storm,” Bellossom fired a current of wind and glowing leafs that started pushing Skarmory back. But Alexa’s determination didn’t stop; she clenched her fist and prepared to give Skarmory’s victory command.

    “Air Slash!” Skarmory increased its speed as it headed back towards Bellossom; breaking the current of the Leaf Storm. The beak sunk right into Bellossom’s skin sending the little plant girl in a turmoil of pain. Bellossom let out one last shriek as it fell to the floor.

    “Return,” Greena was still keeping her cool as she returned Bellossom into its pokéball. “I gotta say, that last combo was great.” She smiled and grabbed another pokéball. “Last round.”

    “Wait; there are only two rounds, why?” Alexa asked a little confused.

    “Simple, I’ll have to battle Ashian after this, and I only have four healthy Pokémon with me, so I’ll have to give two rounds only.” Greena threw the pokéball into the field and her Tangrowth came out, moving its tentacles around in a fighting matter.

    “Return Skarmory.” Alexa grabbed Skarmory’s pokéball and returned it. She grabbed another pokéball and enlarged it. “I choose you Togetic!” Alexa threw the red and white ball, it popped and Togetic came out; flapping its wings happily.

    “Tangrowth, use Vine Whip,” Tangrowth threw its vines forward and slapped Togetic hard all around its body; keeping the fairy Pokémon on the defensive. “Now, take your time to use Double Edge.”

    “You too Togetic!” Togetic started speeding towards Tangrowth, its body surrounded by light; both Pokémon collided and started fighting fiercely to send each other off. Tangrowth trapped Togetic on its vines and started crashing it with the floor. But thanks to its great sense of intelligence, Togetic used Metronome and hit Tangrowth with a jet of flames.

    “It copied a Flamethrower,” Ashian; who was still on the floor, got up and stared at the battle, his eye widened. “Keep going like that Lex!” he yelled putting both of his hands next to both sides of his mouth.

    “Lex,” Greena whispered to herself, she shook it off and raised her hand in confidence. “Tangrowth, use Poison Jab!” Tangrowth’s arm started letting a purple glow, it jumped and thrust the arm forward like if it was a whip, the jab connected with Togetic. Tangrowth took its chance to wrap its arm around Togetic.

    “Use Strangle!” she commanded (note: Strangle is another made up attack, although it’s practically the same a Wrap, just stronger) Tangrowth increased the pressure it had on Togetic; making it so hard you could even hear Togetic’s skin cracking. “Now, use Power Whip!” Tangrowth’s left arm glowed green as it raised it into the air, and then it slammed it down on Togetic sending the poor fairy into unconsciousness.

    “Return, you did good Togetic,” Alexa returned her little Pokémon and stared at Greena. “Time to go back in there Skarmory!” she threw her pokéball and her Skarmory came out, it still looked a little paralyzed, but it could fight better now.

    “She’s back to Skarmory, even if the paralysis has passed, it’s still going to be hard to fight it all off,” Henry assumed a thinking stand as he looked at the battle, on one hand Skarmory knew a lot of flying attacks, and even though neither of Tangrowth’s attacks would work hard on it, the paralysis was still keeping it trapped.

    “Go Skarmory, use Air Cutter!” Alexa screamed as Skarmory flew towards Tangrowth, its wings started gathering air as it crashed against Tangrowth. The vine like Pokémon got pushed back as it roared in pain.

    “Nice attack, but not nice enough, Tangrowth, go for a Brick Break!” Tangrowth jumped around the field as its vine like arm glowed white, it thrust the arm forward and crashed it against Skarmory’s right wing; the metal on the wing practically chattered.

    Skarmory was basically limping, since its wing was totally broken. “Flash Cannon!” Skarmory fired a beam of steel; Tangela took its chance to fire its Solar Beam as both beams crashed. It created a huge explosion sending currents of wind all around.

    “You’re not bad Alexa, I have to say that you’ve actually managed to become a strong trainer,” Greena look at a now terrified Alexa; her identity was out and so was her chance. “You know, your mom comes here every day to check when you’re going to challenge me, in fact she’s late today.” She looked at her watch and then turned back to Alexa. “So you want to keep fighting, because your mom could come in at any moment.”

    “Oh no she won’t!” Ashian yelled, he was on the door that led from the entrance room to the field. “Look better.” He turned sideways. Loudred, Treecko and Charmeleon were helping to hold the door. “If anyone tries to come in, they’ll have to get through me!” he pointed at himself, but instantly turned back to holding the door.

    *Thanks Ashian,* Alexa nodded and raised her finger pointing at Greena. “Now, where were we, or right Skarmory use Brave Bird?” Skarmory flew up as it surrounded itself with flames, that later turned into blue energy. “This attack is learned through hatching, and since I got Skarmory from an egg I found in Pewter, then, I get an attack that can kick ass!” she yelled and Skarmory finally dove towards Tangrowth.

    “Tangrowth, we’re not done either, go for an Ancient Power attack!” Tangrowth got surrounded with rocks that came from the field. It jumped and crashed with Skarmory. Energy was spilled all around as each Pokémon tried to push the other; Tangrowth wrapped its vines around Skarmory and started strangling it again.

    Alexa looked down, letting her hat fall off to reveal her few black hairs she had dyed back at the S.S. Anne Two so that Ashian wouldn’t feel back about dying his hair brown. “Air Slash,” Greena’s face turned to shock as she noticed; Tangrowth still had Skarmory wrapped around, Skarmory lifted its legs and struck Tangrowth with its beak. The vines were cut as the beak sank in. Tangrowth didn’t even scream, it just toppled down and fainted on the spot.

    “You win.” Greena walked over to Alexa, holding the Rainbow Badge in her hands. “I’m really proud, I’ve known you since you were a little girl, and I’m proud to present the Rainbow Badge to you.” She opened Alexa’s hand and put the badge in, and then she closed the hand. “Also, don’t let your mom see you, especially with those hairs, she’ll freak.” Greena laughed eventually leading to everyone else laughing.

    “So….can I leave the door alone now?” Ashian was desperate, since it was tired of holding the door back.

    “Should we let him?” Moana asked as the four turned around.

    “There’s another exit over there,” Greena said as the four started walking to the second exit, leaving Ashian to hold the door.

    “Oh come on guys…I haven’t have battle yet!” Ashian yelled leaving the door and running towards the exit.

    “No let me go!” Alexa shrieked, alarming Ashian as he ran faster. Once he got out, he was in time to see Alexa being grabbed by two purple dressed men, one with a long brown hair and the other with a long black hair. “What’s happening?”

    “What’s happening, is that this is my daughter and now that she’s home I have to take her back.” A lady walked forward, she had a long blond hair that was tied up, she had a pair of sunglasses, she had a long skirt with one short left sleeve and a long right sleeve.

    “Your daughter?” Ashian raised his eyebrow as he turned to look at the scared Alexa. Her mom grabbed the dyed black hairs and grunted in disgusts.

    “Don’t tell me this…trash made you do this to your hair, I knew I should’ve kept you in Coordination school.” She grunted again and turned to Ashian and the others. “Now, if you’ll excuse me.” She and the bodyguards turned around.

    “Wait, give her back!” Ashian ran towards the bodyguards holding his fist up. One of them turned around and kicked Ashian on the ribs throwing him to the floor. Ashian growled as blood started to come out from his mouth. He clenched his fist as the ring he had on his ring finger started glowing blue. “GIVE HER BACK!” he screamed with fury and jumped.

    He sprint forward and threw the punch, punching the bodyguard with the black hair sending him flying with a tree. Last thing Ashian could decipher was that he was panting as he drifted into unconsciousness. ”……Alexa….” He whispered before falling.

    TO BE CONTINUED….

    END OF CHAPTER 34
    NEXT CHAPTER: MIDDLE AGAINST FINAL, ALEXA’S RITUAL
    Last edited by Flaze; 3rd June 2009 at 11:11 PM.

  11. #146
    Henshin! Kamen_Fanatic's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    The sons of bitches! That is cheap, coming in with henchmen....

  12. #147
    Finalize! Black Ace! LightShadow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Very good. Your punctuation is perfect, except for the first few sentences. I've spotted no spelling errors.

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    And there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. The great dragon was hurled down―that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.
    Revelation 12:7-9

  13. #148
    Registered User Drew_A_Blank's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Good job. There are still some punctuation errors, especially some which have created some run-on sentences. I wouldn't think that many bodyguards could justify beating up a little kid. But I suppose that's what you're getting at, right?

  14. #149
    The Dimension Wizard Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Devil Hunter 3000: Thanks well her mom knew that she could become a good Trainer so she didn't want it to fail

    Shadowcomics: Thanks, the first sentences kinda came out before I decided to use punctuation inside quotes

    Drew A Blank: Yeah, I got a little carried away with that but I guess two eleven year olds and two twelve year olds could at least take out....one of them.

  15. #150
    Registered User woops's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon New Generation: a New Beginning (Now On Season 2) (Rated PG to PG-14)

    Another good chapter. Your gym battle was really good, and I really wonder whats gonna happen to Alexa. Good luck on newer chapters.

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