8th November 2004, 06:57 AM #1
The legendary ... BROCK'S FUTURE!
Ha heh, legendary. Who am I kidding. But the two or so places I posted it at long ago seemed to think it was mildly amusing at least. And it's way easier than writing a whole new one!
1 year after the end of the anime: Brock struggles with finding a new job now that his former occupation of being Ash's lackey is gone.
4 years: Brock divorces his third wife and loses all of his Pokemon in the legal disputes.
6 years: Brock manages to gain some minor fame after landing a role in a porno movie titled, "Unregistered Nurse Joys" it was a smashing success.
8 years: Brock is out of work again after his latest adult film "Officer Jenny: Padded Handcuffs, Starring Brock 'The Rock' " bombed at the box office. Brock moves to Celadon City to do some hard drinking, but is assaulted by a bicycle gang; his beloved green vest is stolen. Brock suffers a mental breakdown.
10 years: Brock overdoses on Fine Neon City Crack Cocaine, because he thought it was merely Fine Pewter City Crack Cocaine. Brock is sent to the E.R..
11 years: Brock signs the papers to his sixth divorce, and his angry ex wife breaks into his apartment in Viridian City and tries to kill him with a broken beer bottle.
16 years: Brock moves to Lavendar Town and finds work at Burger
Nidoking; he is fired a month later after hitting on the burger flipper, the customers, AND the manager.
20 years: Brock moves to Pallet Town in an attempt to get some peace and quiet, until he returns home one day from a bar and discovers that his eighth ex wife burned his house down.
25 years: Brock is found passed out behind a dumpster in a back alley in Viridian City clutching a half empty whiskey bottle by his old friends Ash and Misty. They awaken him, and Brock finds out that Ash has become a wealthy Pokemon Master, and he and Misty live in a huge house on Cinnibar Island. They offer to take him in until he can get back on his feet and the alcohol is out of his system.
30 years: Ash has to deal with his status of being a washed up Pokemon Master, and tells Brock he can't afford to house him anymore; Brock leaves for Vermillion City once again, and loses a chance at a high paying corporate job after the job requirements read, "must have eyes". Brock gets a job at Pokedonalds.
33 years: Gary raises a huge army of Pokemon and gets ready to take over the world; seeing Ash as being a possible obstacle in his goal, he hires a group of ninjas to kidnap Ash and force Misty to be Gary's wife. Ash is cast out alone into the desert.
37 years: Ash returns to civilization; after four years of wandering through the desert, he has become super strong and skilled, and asks Brock to help him overthrow Gary who has become the ruler of the world, and rescue Misty. When Brock asks how much booze is in it for him, Ash offers one bottle. Brock refuses and Ash is left to fight Gary and his army of Pokemon by himself.
39 years: Ash and Gary's fight has reached a deciding point, and Gary sends his army of undead flesh eating Pokemon to finish off Ash just as Brock happens to pass by while coming home from a strip club. Brock tries to save Ash, but isn't much help on account of his being hammered from all that booze he drank back at the club. Ash and Brock are cornered, and one of the undead flesh eating Pokemon says, "The fat, squinty eyed one will feed us for several days" to which Brock responds, "Screw that I'm not cooking for no one you can go screw yourselves".
40 years: Ash manages to defeat the Pokemon and beat the shit out of Gary, but when he tries to rescue Misty she says that Gary is more man than Ash ever was and she slaps the taste out of his mouth for beating up her new husband Gary. With Ash stunned, Gary takes the opportunity to send his Pokemon out to tear Ash a new arsehole and keep his position as ruler of the world.
43 years: Brock snaps and travels to his old gym at Pewter City, only to find out that Tracey has taken it over! Brock beats the holy crap out of him and boots him out of the gym saying who the hell do you think you are fatty stealing my friends in the Orange League and then taking over my gym. Brock assembles the largest army of rock Pokemon ever and takes out Gary.
65 years: Brock dies of liver disease after finding out that his past career as Saviour Of The World didn't come with a health insurance plan. He was buried with his beloved green vest which was recovered from a local Pallet Town pawn shop.
22nd November 2004, 02:03 AM #2
Like the Memory of a Kiss
I remember this! I laughed more this time than I did the last time I read it. I think it's 'cause I understand more now. XD;;
"Offered one bottle [of booze], Brock refuses [to help], and Ash is left to fight Gary and his army of flesh-eating Pokémon on his own." XD!!
22nd November 2004, 05:30 AM #3
That's not a fic. That's just stupid. But I suppose the "must have eyes" thing was kind of amusing.