5th June 2005, 08:37 PM #1
A Trainer Fic Parody
Deep in the heart of a small town called Kanto three small houses all perfectly in a line with one another stood housing the three trainers who today would start their unbelievably amazing adventures with pokemon. The first house belonged to a small ten-year-old girl named Mary Sue. Mary Sue was extremely beautiful. Mary Sue was a bright cheery girl with a pair of sparkling sapphire eyes and light blue anime like hair that reached the small of her back. Her beautiful pale china doll like skin covered her shapely figure. Mary Sue was indeed the perfect child in everyway; she helped old ladies across the street, ate her vegetables and always minded her manners.
The second house belonged to another ten-year-old named Gary Stu. Gary Stu was very clumsy and was always late. Although Gary Stu was extremely adamant about pokemon he was a useless child even though he could be the champion with some training and most likely would be. Gary Stu was Mary Sue’s best friend and the two predictably had respected crushes on one another. Yes Gary Stu was indeed a clone of Ash Ketchum. Gary Stu had short light brown hair that was always a mess and a pair of equally brown eyes. His body was slightly tanned and of course was in great shape.
The third and final house belonged to the final young soon to be trainer, ten-year-old Anti Hero. Anti was the grandson of Professor Oak and hated Mary and Gary. In fact Anti hated everything. Anti had short green hair that was stylishly done and a pair of equally coloured eyes. Anti lived with his grandfather and twin sister. Anti’s favourite past times included being cocky, poking fun of Mary and Gary, punching things and not smiling. Anti possessed natural training abilities however he was to mean to ever open up to his pokemon.
Each of the three soon to be trainers slept a goodnight sleep knowing come morning their adventures would begin.
Alright i'm aware the prologue is short and therefore i'll post my completed chapter 1 as well
5th June 2005, 08:37 PM #2
Chapter 1: Waking up
Mary Sue awoke bright and early at seven a.m. She happily sat up in her bright pink bed and pushed back her adorable bright pink blanket covered in various cute pokemon pictures. Mary hugged her favourite beautiful Skitty plushie and rolled out of bed. Mary removed her delightful bright pink pyjamas and proceeded across her large hot pink rug to her personal shower. After she had showered Mary Sue got dressed into the clothes she had laid out the previous night, a light white t-shirt and short skirt covered by a pink rain jacket. Mary realised she still had one hour before she had to go to see the professor so she tidied her room and checked over her bags.
Realising she hadn’t brushed her teeth Mary headed for the bathroom and thoroughly scrubbed her perfect white teeth until they sparkled so brightly that they would have blinded anyone with her cute smile. Mary was suddenly hit with a shock when she realised she had not said her prayers yet. So she sat down and said a short prayer to the lord. Suddenly Mary’s equally perky mother walked into the room.
“Oh hello perfect daughter who I am exceedingly proud of. I see you are already to go. Come down and have breakfast once you have finished with your prayers.” Her mother answered. Mary finished her prayer quickly and raced down stairs. Her mother had made a wide range of food for her to choose from. Of course Mary Sue only ate a light breakfast because she had to watch her perfect shape.
“I have to go now mother.” She said clearing her plate and grabbing her things
“Oh dear, you’re father who was murdered by a heard of Tauros would be so proud if he could see you.” Her mother said. The two shared a short hug and then parted ways. Mary left her house and began the short walk to the professor’s lab. Of course on her walk Mary greeted every villager by name as she passed them because everybody knew of Mary and her perfect life. As she approached the lab she could see her neighbour Anti was already waiting outside.
“Good morning Anti, isn’t it a lovely day?” She said flicking her perfect hair as she spoke. Anti rolled his eyes and turned to Mary.
“Please don’t talk to me, you piss me off” He said. Mary giggled and tapped her male rival on the shoulder.
“Your such a kidder Anti” She said. Anti turned away and with sighed deeply.
“No Mary, the bizarre way your disgusting hair never looses it’s shaping no matter what terrifies me. Once I get my starter hopefully a powerful fire type I plan on burning your hair.” He replied. Mary sighed and turned away.
“Anti would you like to be my travelling companion? Although I am unbelievably perfect and everybody would love to travel with me I was hoping you me and Gary could travel together.” She said Mary had obviously been planning the three of them travelling together for a while.
“No you dishwasher commercial reject I don’t want to.” He yelled. Before Mary could reply Professor Oak opened the door and smiled at the two trainers.
“Hello Anti and Mary. Where is Gary?” He asked Anti scoffed.
“Probably overslept.” The professor rolled his eyes and beckoned the two trainers in after him.
“Mary, Anti I caught you two pokemon I think truly suit your personalities.” The professor grabbed two pokeballs from a table and handed one to each trainer. Mary’s pokeball was a beautiful premier ball that shone like a jewel. Anti’s pokeball was a plain pokeball covered in dirt. Both trainers stared excitedly at their pokeballs. Eventually Mary Sue released her pokemon. After a blinding white light the form of her favourite pokemon, Skitty sat before her.
“Wow, I love it professor. But aren’t these really rare and from Hoenn?” Mary asked. The professor smiled and turned to Mary.
“Yes Mary but because of your cuteness I went all that way to get it for you. It suits you perfectly.” Mary gave the professor a lovely hug then turned to Anti.
“What did you get Anti?” She asked. Anti threw forward his raggy looking pokeball. As the smudged old sphere collided with the ground it broke into tiny pieces. Inside was a Ratatta.
“Hey what’s the deal?” He asked. The professor turned away from admiring Mary and said.
“Oh yeah, well I don’t care about you because your our perfect trainers rival. I found it outside and thought what the hey.” Anti was furious and showed this by kicking the small rat right at Mary Sue. The terrified little rat squealed as it flew towards Mary’s head however it shouldn’t have been worried. As the beast drew closer Mary Sue’s aura of perfect ness surrounded her and shielded her from the tiny rat pokemon’s oncoming attack. The terrified purple fluff ball was captured in the aura and gently placed on the ground in front of Mary, who in turn bent down and patted it.
“Now Anti, that wasn’t a very nice thing to do. I assume it was an accident.” Mary then returned to cooing at her little Skitty. “I shall nickname you Kowaeye.” She said dreadfully pronouncing the Japanese word wrong. Mary turned to Anti and gave him an Oscar winning smile; which he returned with the finger. “What will you nickname yours Anti?” She asked Anti smacked his Ratatta over the head and replied.
“Useless.” Mary giggled, which of course enraged Anti.
“That’s it lets battle!” He commanded kicking Ratatta in front of him. Mary Sue was taken back by the request but agreed to battle anyway.
“Alright then, Kowaeye use your thunderbolt!” Mary commanded Skitty skipped forward and released a thunderbolt from the end of her tail directly at Useless. Anti however was the one to let out a cry in pain.
“Anti, did the thunderbolt hit you?” The professor asked Anti shook his head.
“No but Mary fucking Sue can’t pronounce the word Kawaii and its killing me! It’s pronounced Car-Wa-E not Ko-Wa-Eye!” He screamed Mary ignored the comment and continued the battle.
“Kowaeye use your blizzard!” She commanded while Anti let out another high pitch cry while the concentrated snow attack bombarded the poor weak rat.
“Hold on a moment. Blizzard, thunderbolt, why does her starter have all these cool moves?” He yelled the professor scoffed at Anti and replied.
“Because we love her so much that I went and bought some tms for her.” Anti let out another scream and suddenly realised Ratatta had fainted.
“Fine, ragh I am evil and hate you Mary Sue. I will train harder and come back and beat you RAGH! Now to use a horribly original line, Smell ya later” He said storming off kicking his defeated slave in front of him. Mary bent and gave her Skitty a disgustingly huge hug that made everybody smile.
“Goodbye professor, goodbye fine workers.” She said turning to leave.
Meanwhile on the other side of town back at the perfectly lined houses that formerly hospitalised our three trainers our final hero rose from his deep slumber. He looked over at his Poliwag wall clock and was shocked (although no one else was) to find that he had overslept yet again! He hastfully through back his brown blanket and raced for the door tripping over all his pokemon shaped toys scattered all over his messy floor. He stumbled down the stairs where his parents both sat eating a quiet breakfast.
“Hello Gary, I see you overslept again we didn’t want to disturb you.” His father said.
“You’d better go before you miss out.” Gary nodded and yelled a rushed goodbye to his parents before racing towards the lab. Gary was running as fast as he could. It wasn’t until he was almost halfway to the lab that he realised he was still wearing his stripy blue pyjamas. While Gary contemplated this situation he suddenly ran smack bang into someone. Gary looked up and realised he had just ran into his rival Anti Hero.
“I’m sorry Anti.” He said rushing to his feet and bowing. Anti snickered at him.
“Your late again you dimwit. You’ll miss out and what a shame that’d be.” He said picking up Ratatta into his arms. Before Gary could reply Anti swung Useless around and whacked Gary over the head with the small rat pokemon. Anti dropped Ratatta onto the ground and snickered again.
“Again with the horrible line. Smell ya later!” He said. Gary quickly recovered and rose to his feet rushing to his feet he had finally arrived at the professor’s lab.
“Gary you are late.” The professor said opening the door allowing Mary Sue to exit.
“Oh hi Gary would you like to travel with me?” She asked Gary smiled and said.
“I am sorry I’m late professor and I would love to travel with you Mary.” He said bowing to them both.
“There is only one pokemon left Gary here.” He said tossing him a pokeball.
“Thankyou professor.” He said opening the pokeball. The pokemon was one no one had suspected it was the great and powerful Eevee. “Wow that’s so cool I will name him vee how original. Nobody ever has an Eevee for a starter. Thankyou professor.” The professor smiled and ushered the two out.
“Get going now. The world of pokemon awaits you.” He said. Mary and Gary nodded and raced towards route 1.
“This’ll be so great Gary.” She said holding Kowaeye tight to her chest.
“It sure will Mary.” He replied
5th June 2005, 08:52 PM #3
A black and white world
I'm oddly reminded of that episode of Daria where she babysits for the 'perfect' kids.
7th June 2005, 02:06 AM #4
You know, for kids!
RAGH! Some amusing stuff here. A bit like my own spoof, excpet I kinda did the characters different. But whatever.
7th June 2005, 08:40 AM #5
um... i dunno, I don't really know what to think of it right now...
I don't think there's anything I dislike about it exactly. It's too early to comment on the characters. I know it's a parody but they are really really one dimensional. Which most characters are in parodies and such, but I think some of your humor falls a little flat at times.
Other than saying there's a few spelling mistakes, I can't really comment at the moment since there's not much up.
9th June 2005, 10:16 PM #6
It's pretty decent for a parody.
9th June 2005, 10:38 PM #7
So it is. I like Anti. *cheers Anti*
"It is said that the federal government, if it was in charge of the Sahara, would run out of sand in five years. Private enterprise, being more efficient, would do it in half the time - and they'd make money off the bridges." - me.
Originally Posted by Mintaka and Hurristat
"My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world." - Jack Layton's last letter. Rest in peace, Jack.