MATURE: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World - Page 3

Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast
Results 31 to 45 of 62
Like Tree5Likes

Thread: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

  1. #31
    It wasn't much! Flaze's Avatar Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Why do you care
    Blog Entries
    Add Flaze on Facebook
    Follow Flaze on Tumblr Visit Flaze's Youtube Channel

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Well I wasn't expecting the group to have a total beat down, honestly my prediction was that at least Reika would win but you surprised me. While Josef and Tatcher's battle went as expected I really liked what you did with Ina; you wouldn't expect her to be a competent enough battler, funny thing is that she isn't but rather she just uses a lot of TMs but that still gives her a boost. I'm kind of interested in knowing about her past with Reika now especially after the tantrum that the latter threw.

    The battle between Fritz and Aporon was good but it got a little bit stale around the middle, that doesn't mean it got bad but rather the level of action kind of dropped around that part. It got better at the end though and I had honestly thought that Fritz would actually win but he ended up getting curb stomped by Aporon in the end.

    You used a few words that I had to look up xD so that's good cause you're variating

  2. #32
    Poet Laureate AiedailEclipsed's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    In my own realm...
    Blog Entries
    Follow AiedailEclipsed On Twitter Add AiedailEclipsed on Facebook

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    I'm not gonna beat around the bush too much with this one. Battle scenes aren't really something I'm gonna comment on. But, I will say that they were nicely done.

    Anywho. First, I'll mention that you need to update the Atlas with new information!!! :D I will also note that the battle scenes had wonderful imagery and description. Left nothing to the imagination -- in a good way. You could really visualize what you were going for. Also, Josef is a little his and Thatcher is getting an Aie-hug. Hm. Ina. Still not pissing me off. But her Glaceon was certainly interesting... Disgrace to the name Glaceon really. Perhaps... Nah. (*wink wink*) AND THE BIG REVEAL! HUNTAIL!!! My life has meaning now. I'm not floundering about trying to figure out what that thing was anymore! YAY! In any case, I wasn't expecting it. XD Last real comment: my thoughts at the very end, "Pox Strike? Da shit is this??" Oh, and someone was getting a little cranky there at the end. Finally, the "They managed to piss Aie off Award" goes to... Eh. We'll just let Cronus stay incumbent for the moment.
    "Be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it."
    -- Narrator, Pokemon: Jirachi Wish Maker
    "You can't change the world without getting your hands dirty."
    -- Lelouch Lamperouge, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion
    "Do I have a stamp on my forehead that says, 'The National Spokesperson for the Plight of Black People'? How the hell should I know the black perspective on The Color Purple? That's it, if I don't change classes, I'm gonna hurt this fool. Teachers treat me like I'm some kind of Rosetta stone for African-Americans. What? Black people learn how to read, and we all miraculously come to the same conclusion?"
    -- Victoria, Freedom Writers
    "N's heart is pure and innocent. But there is nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence."
    -- Concordia, Pokémon Black/White 2

  3. #33
    THE CULT OF PERSONALITY System Error's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Blog Entries

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World



    Chapter 2-3: In Seek of Sanctum

    Despite it livening our day, and in fact, managing to get us into continuous motion, the mood of the three of us had fallen to its lowest point this week. None of us were expecting to be beaten as badly as we were. I mean, Reika's Wigglytuff - which she's had for a while - being beat by a Pokémon someone's owned for only two weeks? Thatcher may have been iffy to begin with, but Aporon...

    ...if it wasn't clear. Pox Strike is not a "common" move, and by that, I mean not in the vein of Zap Cannon, Octazooka, or Sacred Fire. There's many moves that are usually practiced and used by Pokémon naturally, there's generic attacks and actions like clawing or kicking, but a few true moves out there that were innovated by humanity. Some fall into frequent usage, others become effective signatures. It's pretty messed up. Most of those who manage to pull it off are creative and open-minded; the last thing I was expecting was for someone institutionalized to do so. I don't know how he did it...or whether it's the type of innovation where one combines two or more moves into something else or another thing altogether. What I can tell you is the effects: it left a nasty mark on the target, and injected venom into the wound. Speaking of which.

    "And the poison is out." I declared. It'd taken me a while to do it, but my Huntail was looking better. It was thankfully nothing too serious. The eel still has a few battle scars, as well as some bandaging, but it had regained its hearty demeanor. I know full well its body would've purged it eventually, but that's not the point.

    My announcement was the first even remotely upbeat action the three of us had made since the battles. It instantly garnered the attention of my friends. Reika and Thatcher had been holding sparse, listless conversation for the last 10-15 minutes, although I hadn't really been following any of it. Thatcher was bewildered, Reika was not impressed. Even on one leg, her posture was jaded. She made her feelings on the matter clear, "Why didn't you just go to the Pokémon Center?"

    I defended my actions. "It's like twelve blocks from the park!" I pointed this out, gesturing to roughly where I believed it to be. "Hell if I'm walking all the way over there."

    Reika just snorted. "It would've been quicker and easier than taking an hour trying to heal the poison yourself!"

    "I did it, didn't I?" Really half-assed, shown especially in how it took me a few tries to get at the poison, and how Tangela acting like a makeshift pressure bandage probably helped more, but I did it. "Besides, I wouldn't have had to do either if you'd just let me take Ina's Antidote."

    "We don't need her charity!"

    "Well," Thatcher stuttered, in attempt to mediate, "You could've...gotten your own Antidote." Well, I wasn't expecting not being around the school for an extended period of time, so I didn't bother to bring any traditional trainer supplies with me. Between an available place for treatment on-campus, my own first-aid kit, and time/rest healing most wounds to an acceptable level, I didn't see the point. And despite a shop likely being closer than the Pokémon Center, there was still a problem.

    "I would've," I replied in mock tone, "But Reika has a broken leg." She'd used the same excuse a couple of times in the past few days as to why we shouldn't go to any places further than a few blocks. In fact, the furthest we travelled - disregarding food - was to a little place across the street, and only because it was raining too hard. Truth be told, it was beginning to get on my nerves.

    "Don't blame me for this!" was her vicious reply. "It's not my fault! I didn't ask for this!"

    "You're the one who vetoed going anywhere."

    "Because you weren't considering me at all!"

    I paused, not wanting to turn this into another large argument between the two of us. Reika is being the selfish one here, but pointing that out won't help matters. "Look, it's okay. I don't mind limiting what I can do." I apologized. She simply miserably turned to the side. "I mean, it's not like there's anything better to do." Which is also the reason why I decided to attempt some highly underqualified medical practices.

    "I disagree."

    Reika and I turned to look at Thatcher, whose eyes were gleaming in excitement. A total 180 from his attitude all the past week, he has a peculiar air about him that just does not seem Thatcher-ish.

    "Remember how I said there's a bunch of Pokémon Contests happening in-town?" He just can't contain his excitement. He bounced in glee. Reika and I both know where it was going, but he proceeded as if we did not. "We should go see one! The hall's not far from here, either!"

    "Sorry, Thatcher. Not right now." Reika's words were apologetic, in contrast to the last time our friend had suggested this. Well, okay. It was apologetic that time too, but she didn't follow it up with scorn here.

    "Yeah." I concurred. "I don't think it would help my mood any." I kept to myself the muse that with how dull things had been, I'd be tempted to actually join in on one out of impulse should we go. Which might stand contrary to what I claimed. It might well pick my mood up.

    "If you say so," Thatcher said. "See ya in a while!" And with that, he skipped away?

    Well. Reika and I exchanged awkward glances after Thatcher rounded a corner out of sight. Words weren't necessary to dictate that neither of us had expected him just to run off like that. I blinked. She whirled her ponytail. We were silent for a few moments.

    "Well, I have to go too." Reika quickly said with a roll of her shoulder. "I have to check in with the doctors and see how my leg's doing."

    Wait, that's right. Shortly after the announcement of the school's closure, Reika was approached by someone - presumably on the medical staff - who told her to visit a specific clinic in-town. I'd forgotten about that until now, and I'm guessing they booked an appointment for her there, just in case.

    "Want me to come with you?" I offered.

    "I don't want to burden you. Go do something YOU want to do." She was angrily adamant. Ignoring the fact that I wanted to come support my friend in time of her injury, and otherwise had nothing to do.

    "Oh." I remembered just as she turned around. She span back with a befuddled expression. Something had been bugging me for a little while. "Can I ask you a question, real quick?"



    "Ugh." Reika tilted her head up irritably and into the light of the sun, briefly shielding her face from the glare. In the rays, her eyes now looked more green than brown. Hazel coloration? She lowered her gaze to meet mine, losing the luster and returning to the tint I was used to. "You mean you didn't notice before?"

    "Well, I never really looked at your eyes."

    My response seemed to catch her off-guard. Her face had an expressionless surprise on it, and I swear she mouthed the word "what."

    "Anyway, I'll be back in a while." she stated, hobbling off almost completely unburdened by her injury. It makes me wonder if she was just too lazy to go anywhere, but oh well.


    I sat on a bench by myself for around ten minutes after this, allowing Eevee and Mareep to get a little exercise. Ultimately, I got tired of the solitary wait. Well, I was tired of waiting in general, actually. Three-quarters of the past week consisted of us biding our time. And with time moving at a snail's pace, those ten minutes I thought could very well have only been two or three. Recalling both Pokémon, I resolved to go check out the school, in a bid to find out why it was taking so long to reopen. Not confident, but here's hoping.

    Moldeau Town had been a different place over the past week. It wasn't necessarily due to the fact that a fire sparked by a still unknown culprit had occurred at the school, but more how the 2000+ students from said place were sharing the town as a consequence.

    The third years and fourth years live in town, and even over the past week have been congregating around their lodges north and northeast of Rukh's. The townsfolk had been adjusting to the outpouring, but were still unused to the omnipresence and 1200 extra people. It was most apparent in the morning; during the evening, a semblance of normalcy - at least by contrast - drew over the municipality.

    I traced the same path my friends and I had taken a week prior to find my way back to Rukh's. It wasn't too long until the unmistakable tall barricade that surrounded the University came into view. It stands about a meter higher than most of the buildings on Minami Street, with the corner decor towering a storey above. At least from the outside, it's quite clear that these walls belong to a school and not a prison.

    Opposite the gate is a block with six stores facing the school. The most relevant of these is a small corner store; it doesn't have as big a selection for trainers as the dedicated shop a couple blocks north, but it's got a modest selection for Pokémon in addition to what it offers for humans. It's apparently a popular spot for students wishing to purchase food they can prepare themselves. The only other establishment of note serves the opposite purpose - a homely café that receives a respectable amount of business from school and citizens. A few other restaurants are in the area, but this is the nearest. Personally though, I would go with quality over convenience.

    A dirt lot is stationed on the east corner of Rukh's boundary. The size leaves a lot to be desired, but this is the only place the school offers its faculty and student drivers a place to park. It is well-maintained, at least as far as makeshift parking lots go. It gives a decent view of the lake, the fence notwithstanding. Nothing similar is on the west side; the woods stretch all the way down, acting as a natural, if thin barrier, with another fence set up so people can't just wander in.

    As I suspected it would be, the shiny steel gate is shut tight. What luck though! I can hear a conversation in-progress on the other side of the wall. It's what I was crossing my fingers on. I couldn't see who was present, so I walked up to the left wall to listen in better, mindless of any odd looks it might draw on.

    "I don't care," came the unmistakable voice of Dean Howard Finkerton, "We have kept the school closed for longer than practical. Students in town are beginning to become restless, and I've received around a dozen phone calls. Every day this place is not open, I'm losing money."

    Another voice, a middle-aged man that I did not recognize. "With all due respect sir, Wendell's class as well as my own class are out of commission. Perhaps you should-"

    He was cut off. "For the last time, there is nothing any of us can do about Breeding class, Zygon. As for Rangerism, I have already allotted space in the fields for it to be held. Worus has already prepared an alternative, and I suggest you do the same. Spend less time worrying about my business, and more time worrying about your responsibilities. Otherwise, I'll have to let you go."

    Mr. Zygon groaned. There was a break in the discussion that lasted about eight seconds, before he let out a more depressed groan.

    "Well now, since our investigation here has concluded, you're free to run the place as you choose." The next person to speak was Moldeau Town's Chief of Police. I met with Burt Garfunkel about two days after the fire, to give my account as sole witness to the events. He seemed to be a decent enough guy. The archetype of a good cop, if you will. "Although, I am curious what you plan on doing. If you don't mind, that is."

    The Dean was confident in his reply, "The immediate plan is to cancel all school-wide assemblies until further notice. Fortunately, those are few in number. I've been thinking on what to do with the old store. If there is enough area, I may demolish it and place the new auditorium there. If not, we'll use it as a temporary auditorium for the remainder of the year, and demolish the present one."

    "Dean Finkerton." A fourth voice? This one belonging to a young woman. Her voice had little emotion, yet was becalmed. "There is already a lot of construction at the University. I understand you have goals of expansion, but-"

    She was cut off. "You're still not helping, you know. We've talked about your concerns numerous times before, and especially in the state we are in now, they are the least of my worries."

    "Dean Finkerton." she repeated. This was succeeded by whispers. I pressed my ear against the granite in attempt to hear better. It was to no avail. I think it would be faint even to Mr. Zygon and Chief Garfunkel.

    "Understood." the girl replied as the conversation become audible again. "I will go tell the faculty of your decision."

    The exchange between the three remaining individuals pressed onward at a low volume. I could hear their mumbles with as much clarity as the whispers. It was shortly thereafter drowned out by sound of the gate sliding open. I checked to the right to see who would emerge.

    I was stunned momentarily at sight of this unusual person. Let's get the first thing out of the way: she's dyed her hair a forest green, which is adorned with a branch-like ornament. Her eyes are also green. And no, I'm not kidding. Her hair was somehow dyed green. She has a slim figure, shown off by her two-piece violet robe, and is about 5'5''-5'6''. Or wait...maybe she used indigo or something. But wait, that would make her hair blue. What the fuck? Why would she even do this?

    As I regained my composure, I noticed the girl was expressionlessly staring at me. She closed her eyes. The sun was mercilessly beating down on the back of my head. Unable to think of cordial words to say, I tensely waited to see what she would do. Her mouth soon opened. The words lagged behind.

    "You are the one who was in the forest a week ago."

    "You're talking about the fire, aren't you?" My voice trailed off. It wasn't a distressing incident to discuss, but I didn't feel like speaking about it willy-nilly.

    "Yes." She replied with a nod of her head. The strange girl was in contemplation, hands folded, as if she were carefully considering what to say. It felt like forever, but she eventually asked a question, "When you were standing before the stables that night, what were you holding in your heart?"

    I have no idea what to make of that. "You mean, what I felt?" What kind of a question is that? It was by sheer forbearance that my reply, "I don't quite follow you," was inert and not querulous.

    "I apologize for the suddenness." she responded, detecting my uneasiness regardless. "The school will be reopening in two days. When you have the time, could you come to the small building near the eastern side of the forest?"

    "I...guess I could do that?"

    "Thank you." she said with a smile. She subsequently crossed the road and began heading for parts unknown.

    The eastern side of the forest. There's little directly to the east, so what I'm speculating she's referring to is a tiny, almost-insignificant shack near the offices. A wooden hut that's not quite a shed, yet not quite a cabin either. I wonder what she could want. But more importantly: hallelujah, we're going back to school! Six words no one should ever have to say!

    I accomplished what I set out to do. May as well head over and tell Reika the good news.


    The specific clinic that Reika had been sent to was hardly special. It's only about two blocks east of the park, part of a group of facilities contained in one long building. About the norm for this part of town - a gaze in either direction saw only rows of the same along the narrow (at least for Moldeau) streets. One could easily walk by the Waribiki Walk-In, not noticing the modest facility squeezed between a laundromat and a butcher's shop.

    I initially thought to enter, but resolved to wait on a bench outside instead. A small plaque dedicated to one Miles Yanguchishio is on the center of it. I think it says he was cut down in his youth. Kind of odd to see a bench dedicated to a person, though. And why a bench of all things?

    After about 10-15 minutes of waiting, Reika came out of the clinic. Instead of the beige wrap around her right leg, she sported a sturdier shell of white plaster. She had her cutoffs on this morning, but had removed the lower section sometime between then and now. They were distinctly stuffed into her pockets. Her eyes immediately drew over to me.

    "That looks way better." I greeted as I stood and stretched.

    She fired a quizzical glare my way. "What are you talking about?"

    "Your cast, I mean." Reika just sighed and shook her head, apathetic to or disinterested in this subject. I followed along as she began to head up the sidewalk. "Anyway, I went to the school while you were gone. I couldn't get in, but I heard that it'll be reopening in two days."

    "Good to know." she said, turning back with a slightly more positive demeanor. "God, I am sick and tired of sleeping out in the STUPID outdoors. The town's doctors said it's not good for my leg, either."


    The two of us continued to walk a straight path, just taking in the span of midtown. Traffic density was light, a surprise given that lunch hour had to be nigh, but a welcome one. The clean streets are quite impressive. Given what I've seen on the grounds and the fact that the students of Rukh's are now in-town, it may even ordinarily be even tidier. More than likely, another attribute of this carefully planned community. Who could blame them, though? The only ones who could be upset about it are scavengers.

    After we had gone a block and a half north, we stopped at a streetlight. "It's nice to have a change of scenery, isn't it?" I asked, attempting to make casual conversation as we waited for the crosswalk signal.

    "It is!" she sighed exasperatedly. We'd been in a complete rut the past week, and she most of all was stressed about it. It was in-part due to her unwillingness to go anywhere, which is making me smile a little to myself over how she's handling this like it's nothing. "It's better here than in that park. I never want to go back to that place again!"

    "Don't act like it's my fault." The way she was saying it and how she looked at me, that was the impression I was getting from her.

    "You're the one who suggested we sleep there!"

    "It was better than the alternatives!" I emphasized. "Even you agreed at the time!"

    She grumbled in response.

    "But, yeah." I conceded, again attempting to avoid conflict as the light changed to green and the digitalized beeping reverberated. "I really don't want to back there either."

    I thought about Reika's invocation as we strolled between the cleanly paint lines. I tried to think of a way so that we would never have to sleep in that park another two days. Something came to me about a third up the next block, and I slowed my pace. "Well, what we could do," I began, causing Reika to halt as well. "We could go meet Thatcher at the stadium." I gestured to the rounded structure, just visible ahead and to the right. "Then if we pool together our money, we might be able to rent a room for a day or two, cheap."

    My friend offered unveiled distaste towards my proposal. "And you think we'd be able to find a place like that in this kind of city? Are you retarded?"

    "Hm. I guess you have a point." I sighed. It wouldn't be easy to find a place with passable short-term lodging at an affordable price in this town, especially by ourselves. "But still, it wouldn't hurt to try. I mean, who knows?"

    In response, Reika turned away, and VERY sarcastically said to herself, "I'm glad you're optimistic."

    Before long, the stadium came into full view. The gaudy locale where contests are held in the Moldeau Town has surroundings hyping it up closer to a battling or even a sporting stadium - although I don't know how popular the latter are in Japan. As part of the efforts to reduce skyglow, no doubt, there are no flashy neon lights to be seen on or around the open-air structure. They seemed to be compensating by making it as colorful as possible, painting the place in pinks, yellows, blues, and white. It's also possessing a rim that reminds me of an old bathtub..In fact, given four pillars jutting from the sides of this oval-shaped building, that may have been the look they were going for.

    Reika and I would not have to wait even a minute before Thatcher came uncharacteristically skipping out of the front entrance. His joy shifted into overdrive when he spotted us. He came barreling in so fast, I involuntarily took a step to the side. My fears of being bowled over as he screamed, "YOU GUYS!!!" were for naught, thankfully. When he was about eight feet away, he made a twirling leap...landing a little awkwardly.

    Even that couldn't kill his mood. He adjusted his glasses (which had to have been a millimeter from flying off his nose) and picked himself right back up, a big grin fixed onto his face.

    "What is it, Thatcher?" Reika asked with honest concern. "I usually don't see you like this."

    "Because I won!" Thatcher shouted whilst performing a jumping jack. A few people were staring at him, but he didn't notice or didn't care. "I won, you guys! I won! I won four tickets to the big contest!"

    "Big contest?" I thought aloud. Again, I haven't the faintest idea about Pokémon coordinating, so...

    "Maribel Capdevila is going to be competing! My idol is going to be competing!"

    Reika groaned and shook her head sadly.

    "Slow down, Thatcher! Slow down." I raised my palms and outstretched my arms. Thatcher stopped bounding and took a deep breath to compose himself, but still couldn't help but smile. I nodded. "All right. Start from the beginning."

    "Well, okay." He took another deep breath. "I went to the contest hall today, because I knew they were having a giveaway for tickets today. And, well, I won. I won! We can go see this big contest!" He started off good, but his excitement was a beast that could not be tamed. He wore the purity of a young child as he asked, "You guys will come see it, right?"

    Reika remained silent. I cocked my head. "Yeah," I agreed while nodding. "I'd be fine with that. But you said there's a bunch of them being held over two weeks. What's so special about this one?"

    "Oh, those were just, you know, mini and unofficial ones." I had no time to tell him I had no clue what that meant before he jabbered, "I'm talking about is the first real contest being held here. It's an exclusive invitational contest by Ward Whalz, and Maribel Capdevila is one of the participants!"

    I laughed a little. "You really want to see her perform, don't you?"

    "Yup," he stated with mirth. "And I know she's going to win!"

    "The true victor shall be Augustus Gabriel."

    That voice. "Wait, is that-"

    "What the hell are YOU doing here?" Reika clamored as someone approached us. Her eyes were crested like blades, but it failed to delay the speaker's advance. I swear, that red outfit with matching ribbon has to be a reference with something. But like I said before, I don't keep up with the latest Sinnoh fashion trends, so this could very well just be the norm.

    "A question better asked by me to you, former roommate." Liane scrutinized. Reika was briefly surprised at the mention of the last two words, though quickly went back on-guard. We should have seen it coming, though. You don't just go back to the customary after failing to frame someone for theft, let alone when the allegedly stolen object really does end up being pilfered. "Not once did you express an interest in contests, unlike myself."

    Reika grumbled loudly, but didn't retort. "Now then!" the trendy girl dictated, "What I approached you, or rather, this fellow for."

    "M-me?!" So there is something that could spoil his mood.

    "You were the winner of the door prize, didn't you?" Liane I think was trying to be casual, much like she did when she first approached me. The presence of Reika may have been making it difficult for her. Her head was pointed at Thatcher, but her eyes were constantly shifting to her. "Since you attended alone, I presume you have an excess of tickets."

    "They're all taken." Reika's response was immediate. Liane took a step back, her body language full of ambiguity.


    "I'm going because my friend is going!"

    "Hmph." Liane snorted at Reika's bold proclamation. She turned to address me, and unlike our last two conversations, I found venom flying into my face. "So what stake do you have in this? From what I heard, you are in the University's Tactics class. Why would you want to see this event?"

    "You don't have to be an aspiring coordinator to enjoy contests, do you?" I calmly replied with a shrug. "Some people watch contests because they like to watch contests, not because they want to be in contests. Besides, Thatcher wants us to go with him."

    She looked us over, and it almost seemed like a look of recognition washed over her - if only momentarily. Ultimately, Liane shook her head and narrowed her eyes. "I think you are lying. And even given that is the truth, there are three of you present, and four tickets." She turned back, and with more focus this time, made an appeal to Thatcher. "I only wanted to ask if you'd spare me the one. Not as charity, mind you. I'd be willing to-"

    "We have a fourth!" Reika again made a bold proclamation.

    "Oh, really?" Liane had been expressing skepticism prior, but the tone she took here showed complete nonbelief. Her question, "Who is this fourth person?" had to have been asked with some sadism in-mind.

    And indeed, Reika couldn't give her an answer. I stepped in with an ambiguous, "If we told you, you wouldn't believe us."

    "I have difficulty believing you even now."

    "Piss off, already!" Reika flipped the bird and screamed loud enough to send one perched on a lamppost flying. "If you want to see that contest, find another way!"

    Liane just shrugged and sighed, as if this just wasn't worth her time. She sauntered off without a further word or action directed at us.

    "Th-thanks, you two." Thatcher stammered. Back to his usual timidness. Well, almost. He saw my expression and with concern asked, " something wrong?"

    "Oh." I plainly stated. "Well, here's the thing." I went on to explain the plan to rent a room that I had discussed with Reika. He nodded as I did so.

    "I-I understand."

    "Fritz, you still haven't answered my question!" Reika stepped between us. Some of her frustrations from the unexpected appearance of Liane Weiks were still being let off. "Where are we going to find a place like that here?"

    "Hm." I'm sure there's something, but I don't know what it could be. But maybe someone else would have an idea, "Maybe Mr. Gruff would know?"

    "Th-that're right, Fritz. It could...he would know, if anyone."

    I smiled and stretched. Reika contemplated this solution for a moment, but eventually fell on the same page as Thatcher and I. "Well, let's go find that guy, then."
    Don't know what to put here.

  4. #34
    Poet Laureate AiedailEclipsed's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    In my own realm...
    Blog Entries
    Follow AiedailEclipsed On Twitter Add AiedailEclipsed on Facebook

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    So, as per the usual, my review!

    Nice way to explain Pox Strike. Although, I do have to agree; "creative and open-minded" is definitely not what comes to mind when I think of Cronus. And Reika is back on my smack-silly list. Lord have mercy, we have such a tolerate-hate relationship. And oh Lord, I could just see Fritz participating in contest. Priceless. And on that note, I love how Thatcher is just like "I'm not even gonna deal with you bitches today. Peace." Too good. Reika's eye thing is... kinda a letdown. I was expecting them to like pop out of the socket and tap dance. Not being a different color in the right light. I mean, my hair does that. And no one is like "FREAK-HAIR!!!" Nice description of the town and the university though. And here with go with Mr. Finkerton, oh Lawd. Interesting interaction. I'm curious what the whispering was about. And MYSTERIOUS GIRL OHMAHGAWSH. I bet its the one from the fire the other nigth were she was all "'Twas not him." Anywho, that interaction will be interesting to say the least. And we're back to Reika complaining and general being bitchy. Happy, happy, joy, joy. Oh gosh. Thatcher is just so damn adorable. I wanna just pinch his cheeks. That cute little fart. Gosh. Overall, nice chapter.
    "Be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it."
    -- Narrator, Pokemon: Jirachi Wish Maker
    "You can't change the world without getting your hands dirty."
    -- Lelouch Lamperouge, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion
    "Do I have a stamp on my forehead that says, 'The National Spokesperson for the Plight of Black People'? How the hell should I know the black perspective on The Color Purple? That's it, if I don't change classes, I'm gonna hurt this fool. Teachers treat me like I'm some kind of Rosetta stone for African-Americans. What? Black people learn how to read, and we all miraculously come to the same conclusion?"
    -- Victoria, Freedom Writers
    "N's heart is pure and innocent. But there is nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence."
    -- Concordia, Pokémon Black/White 2

  5. #35
    It wasn't much! Flaze's Avatar Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Why do you care
    Blog Entries
    Add Flaze on Facebook
    Follow Flaze on Tumblr Visit Flaze's Youtube Channel

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Let's do some Contests! or at least in the next chapter xD

    The chapter was uneventful but I believe it worked as a set up fro the next one, plus we also got some foreshadowing regarding Rukh academy. I do wonder who the girl with green hair was though, it was really sudden for her to just appear like that but I assume she'll be important later on. One thing I would've liked though if is if we had gotten at least one scene focusing on Thatcher and the contest but I understand that you've wanted to find away to do things without dragging the plot too much.

  6. #36
    Christmas Bubble Frog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Blog Entries

    Follow Bubble Frog on Tumblr

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    One week late, derp. Well I finally managed to tear myself from my lethargy to finally review this mama. It was a really enjoyable chapter on the initial read through I gave it like a week or two ago. Mainly because I'm a fan of well-done battles and battle scenes. Did not expect Aporon, Ina, and Josef to manage a clean 3-0 sweep of them. I think it's good though since it builds up a little more animosity and turmoil within the group, Thatcher for example and his being bullied by Josef and Aporon's superiority complex over Fritz. The chapter once again did a nice job highlighting Thatcher's wimpy/meek demeanor. Ina and Reika's interactions are a special case, Ina came off as completely friendly and harmless while Reika came off as more of an antagonist so you got me curious on what type of past these two have. Glad to see the Eevee motif wasn't dropped but at the same time isn't "in your face" all the time, needless to say I wonder if the constant use of TMs and Ina's Eevee's speedy evolution say something about her character. Still don't see how Reika could hate someone so ditzy. Maybe she's wealthy or something? Dunno. Wigglytuff really came off as bumbling and klutzy in the battle, guess its balloon-like body gave off that effect with the constant jumping everywhere. Reika's temper tantrum at the end was golden. Really starting to wonder if Thatcher is an inexperienced trainer, compared to Reika and Fritz he has no evolved Pokemon and is going for Contest. Plus he seems to have a sense of up-and-coming about him with his flaws like his stage fright and softness. Interactions between Fritz and Aporon were funny with the "no coaching" stuff.

    Moving on to the Aporon battle, it felt a bit dragged out near the end with the constant attack exchanging with no one falling. The thing I loved about this was, drum roll please, the mystery member of Fritz's team was revealed to be a Huntail. Your previous descriptions of it have been so cryptic and welly placed it was a genuine surprise to find out what it was. Knew it couldn't be a Gyarados, too small so I was thinking Dratini and then tried to remember if Dratini can learn any water-expelling attacks so didn't have a clue what it was. I really was surprised at the Pox Strike scenes, OC move perhaps? Apparently a very lethal one given the way Huntail was rocked. I also noticed how when threatened Aporon's calm and mature demeanor gradually began to chip away and he faltered into an arrogant, screaming wreck who wouldn't let Fritz get one word out. It was a really entertaining chapter, subtle character development, and a few twist.

    Just some commentary I had during class.

  7. #37
    THE CULT OF PERSONALITY System Error's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Blog Entries

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World


    A note on this next chapter:


    Chapter 2-4: Chaos Theorem

    As April gave way to the month of May, normalcy was able to return to Moldeau Town. Just hours removed from my hearing it, the relief washing over the citizens of the town and students of Rukh's University alike was palpable. It was set in stone. The school was set to reopen on the Tuesday. The day when the calendar would be turned to the next page.

    The day that page turned started smoothly. My friends wanted to go check up on a few things at the dorms, so I went to class ahead of them. Dr. Spfogckdl was already in the room, despite it being about twenty minutes to 10AM. There was really nothing to do besides chat with a few people with the same idea as me in the meantime. Everyone was glad classes were back, even through erratic enthusiasm and frantic rush. One couple - and I only remember their names because they introduced themselves as Teiko and Teikō - said they went back home during the break, and were barely able to arrange a trip back in time. One guy mentioned that his friend would be outright late.

    Reika and Thatcher arrived about three minutes before the bell. The former plunked down on her seat with an annoyed groan. "Why did it have to be Biology we come back to?"

    "Well, it was going to be what we would've had on the Monday," I pointed out, "If the fire hadn't happened." Two days before, it was Art in the morning and Sciences in the afternoon. The former never occurred due of the assembly in the late stables - starring Theodore Louis, spokesman of the Heritage Delegates - but it didn't disrupt the order. The day after, it was Socials/a battle class. So then it would've been Sciences/Art. Like we have now.

    "Why couldn't they have just kept to schedule?" Reika demanded to no one in particular. "Why couldn't we have what was going to be today, today?"

    "Dunno." Actually, that's a damn good question. The teachers have these calendars with the block schedules on them. Printing the new ones would mean using printer ink, which costs money. So it's something Dean Finkerton would try to avoid if possible. Just thinking about it is making my brain hurt.

    "Maybe...they know, they wanted to keep..." Thatcher spoke as if he were trying to find the words to explain, but he paused halfway through. "No...never mind."

    "Thatcher?" Reika leaned in with concern.

    ", never mind."

    The bell hummed, and the first class back was underway. "Welcome back to ze Univerzity, students." The doctor was totally composed, putting at least some of the tensions at ease. As he addressed us, he casually shuffled some papers in the meantime. "I tink ze feuer is now ein memory to most of you. Ze grief should have passed, ja?"

    He briefly paused to clean his lens. "Let us get to eet." Dr. Spfogckdl stated after, getting right down to business. "To start zis day proper, we shall virst be reviewing what we were going over before ze termination of ze classes."

    Thatcher turned to me. "Do you remember any of it?"

    "No," I replied, "A refresher after that break is like, a given."


    After the class. we somehow ended up agreeing to eat indoors. Reika and Thatcher went to go get the food, whereas I chose to go up to the Art floor in advance.

    To describe it a bit further than before. There's three hallways on the long side, all that lead into two on the short side. The first of these is along one of the building's walls, sporting large windows overlooking the outdoor battlegrounds and forest. It seems popular for the view, or at least the prospect of natural light without having to be outdoors. The opposing barricade is squarely concave, with several cafeteria (?) tables set up along the wide cranny.

    As for the other two, they're the ones you end up after coming onto the floor from either set of stairs. The middle of the bunch is the one with the display case on one end and entrance to Art class on the other. The lower one has two classrooms on it - Entertainment being one, and the other marked for an elective - and leads to two additional hangout spots on the floor. The one on Art class' end is small and nothing spectacular. But the one where I was waiting for my friends in caught the eye immediately. It's sort of this really deformed U-shape around a stage - a larger and higher platform than that on the first floor - where students from the Contest class behind it were practicing their skills.

    It was a little inane, but strangely engrossing. Particularly when an impromptu fight broke out. It was so much that I failed to notice the person approaching.


    "What?!" I snapped.

    "I'm just here to tell you that the tournament won't be affected." I repeated the word I said, in a confused tone. Aporon was here, and for once, he was being pleasant? He went on to clarify, "I went and asked Mr. Baiaz just now. He told me that the tournament schedule won't be affected by the situation. Come May 18th, it'll begin."

    I raised an eyebrow. "And that's it? That's all you wanted?"

    "That's it," he plainly said. Mild foreboding was spliced into his next two words, "For now." With this, he turned down the hall and went down the stairs.


    Lunch passed uneventfully, and then it was time for Art class. The students were silent as it officially began. Ms. Odell was silent as it officially began. She's got on incongruous attire and an apocryphal smile. Her face did not change as she rose. Something's up.

    "Um! Um! Um!"

    Um? Don't tell me, for the love of god.

    "Hey, William!" she called out after a few moments of whirling her head back and forth. She sleeked over to him. The eyes of the two young men sitting with him stretched comically wide. And they weren't the ones being addressed. "William," she sucked up. Now she was beginning to get to him. He slid his chair back a little. "Would you mind teaching the class for me, please?"


    That was all he said in response. Ms. Odell hastily moved on to another table. "How about you? Oji? Can you teach the class?"

    I couldn't see this fellow's expression, but his body language spoke for itself. A priceless combination of coyness and pusillanimity. He meekly shook his head.

    "Toby!!" This time, she entrancingly marched over in rhythm to each syllable, "Woncha be...the teacher for me?"

    This time, the response was a plain and simple, "No."

    "Why don't you have Fritz teach us?"

    "Hey," I responded to the random male student putting a random suggestion forth, "I don't know enough about Art to do that."

    "You're not asking Teikō?" Teiko inquired after. I still can't get over that, Teiko and Teikō. That's just hilarious. "You know he's good at it."

    "I could do that!" he confirmed.

    "Oh," Ms. Odell replied, ignoring what he said, "I couldn't ask him. Even if you're fine with it. But I could ask...Keiji!"

    Reika leaned over to me as Ms. Odell made yet another attempt to get someone to do her job. With eye contact on the delirious woman, she whispered, "This is pathetic. Is she honestly so incompetent that she didn't prepare for this?" With a snort of derision, Reika said, "Is that why she's going around trying to charm all the boys into teaching for her?"

    "You noticed too?" How she's only asking boys, I mean. That aside, this teacher clearly has no idea what to do, after having missed a week's lessons and not having taught this grouping a single proper one thanks to her day of introductions coupled with the assembly. I'm not sure what to think of this.


    Ultimately, not much happened in Art, even when someone finally volunteered herself to do so. The same could be said for the rest of Tuesday.

    The mood of the second day back was like that of the first, only upped by a factor of three. As Aporon had proclaimed, Tactics class proceeded as nothing had happened. In fact, not once did Mr. Baiaz even bring up the forest fire; I only heard mention of it from conversations my classmates were having. I didn't see much of Aporon or the jackasses there, which was a plus. And to make sure I didn't see much of them after, I left with the crowd.

    After a lunch in Thatcher's dorm, it was off to Socials class. The foreboding could instantly detected by even the densest individuals. The silence was deafening as the bell hummed out, and we waited for Mr. Yamaguchi to speak.

    "The circumstances of the past week have been disruptive to all of us." He methodically started with folded hands. "We all are coping in our own ways. This includes we on the staff." Faint antipathy came out as he indirectly mentioned his colleagues. "It has proven damaging to our various schedules. But fact is, we all must move forward as it was written, regardless of the actions of others."

    "Oh, god damn it..." were the words I rasped as soon as he said those words. I wasn't the only one who could tell right away where this was headed, but my friends were a little slower on the draw.

    "What do you mean-" Reika started to ask, as our teacher began to elaborate.

    "Today, on May 2nd, you will be learning of what I had planned for you to learn on May 2nd. The reading and work from the week missed will be for you to do this week on your own time."

    "...oh, god DAMN it!" Reika cursed, and for once, her complaints are among the quieter. A week's worth of assignments PLUS the stuff being assigned. Not a popular concept. Pleas, logical debate, and even verbal abuse was being thrown at the teacher, but he was having none of it.

    "Enough!" he sharply asserted with a raised palm. Mr. Yamaguchi was sticking to his carefully crafted plan, and there was nothing anyone could do to change his mind. "There is much to learn in my class." He calmly stood to his feet and unfurled a map, preemptively preparing as he continued to prattle. "Little is doable now. This could be avoided only by actions of Mr. Westmyn, which were not taken."

    Oh, god damn it again. He's against me. The way he glared over his shoulder at me told the whole story. I don't know if he honestly believes that's the case or not, but what matters is he is casting a blame on me regardless. And from a few dirty looks I may be working.


    "This is garbage."

    The three of us had been loitering in the Student Square for about an hour after class. Reika had been doing enough venting for the three of us, this quote being the latest and briefest. We'd been trying to get at least started, but the stress was just too high. Even Thatcher was feeling it.

    "Y-yeah. I...I don't know if I...if anyone he really expecting. It is...garbage."

    Reika shook her head. She stamped her good leg with such fervor, I momentarily feared she would break it too. "No. It's fucking bullshit is what it is!"

    "Hey..." My friends turned to me. They hadn't noticed my uncharacteristic silence this time. I've been thinking. If one teacher took such an action, I'm certain that others did too. Whether they all stood united with me as a scapegoat, I don't know. But the air feels so different now than it did before, and I need to know one thing. "You guys don't blame me for this, do you?"

    "Of course we don't!" Reika's snapping did little to comfort me, even though it should've.

    "It's...yes," Thatched meekly agreed. "You did all you could. That's...that's what you said...that counts. Right?"

    "Right. He may as well have blamed us for not helping! We did nothing wrong!"

    "You did do something wrong, Ms. Easton."

    "Oh-" Shit. My cursing forgetting all about that was enough to make me speak half a thought aloud.

    Thatcher flipped at sight of who approached. She may not be the most intimidating person on the outside, the hair-bun notwithstanding. The issue is, she is on the inside, and that simply leaks out of her. My friend hid behind me from this stern presence, squeaking, " are..."

    "Mrs. Shugiri, long-time faculty member, librarian, and disciplinarian." I should've seen this looming and warned them beforehand. But I forgot. "Students are not allowed to travel to Abet's Bluff, barring special circumstances."

    "What kind of a rule is that?" Reika protested.

    "It exists for your own protection."

    "No," she said, with a guise that danced on the boundary between wrathful and psychotic, "I mean, what the FUCK kind of rule is that?"

    "There's no rule against cursing on grounds, Ms. Easton, and only implied expectancy to show respect." Mrs. Shugiri didn't so much as flinch. Which raises the question of what it does take. I want to know. "However, respecting the rules is expected."

    "Mrs. Shugiri, why punish them more?" Maybe I couldn't give them advance notice, maybe I couldn't help them then, but I can try to help them now! "They've already suffered emotional and physical trauma from the incident. It seems redundant at this point."

    A nod. "You raise a fair point, Fritz Westmyn. But I do things by the book. And the book says a punishment must be administrated to students in violation of code."

    "So you're going to kick us all when we're down? Is that what you're doing?"

    There was a pause.

    "...all three of you went?"

    Wait, they didn't know I was there? Well, thank you Aporon and friends for not ratting me out, but DAMN IT REIKA!!

    "I..." Thatcher shuffled to my left. He didn't want to stand in front, but the marginal increase in bravery was apparent. "We...forced him to come along. He...he was tired, and we...forced him."

    "Thatcher," Reika sharply said, before hesitating, "Is telling the truth."

    "And you knew it was against the rules to go to the bluff?"


    No mens rea. Am I in the clear? Mrs. Shugiri plainly went on to say, "With that being the case-"


    "What was that?" It came from the school.

    The librarian/disciplinarian was unmoved even by...whatever that was. Not loud, but sharp and sudden. "If you'll excuse me. Ms. Easton. Mr. Li. You will report to the library every day after classes for two hours, and for three hours on weekends." With that, she coolly went off to investigate. She was the only one heading towards the building. Everyone else was heading out of or away from it.

    "The building's being evacuated..." That might not be a big matter, but still. That aside, my friends both have downcast eyes, and are in a sort of thought. I asked, "Why'd you guys cover for me?"

    "It' it true..."

    "Ugh," That had been enough for Reika, who was now completely spent, "I can't believe this. Detention? What are we, nine again? A broken leg is bad enough, and now all this?!"

    We stood in silence, trying to make sense out of what had happened in the school. At least, I was. I'm not so sure if Reika or Thatcher care about it right now. Among the people funneling out of the school were two semi-familiar to me. They're headed in our direction by incidence. Maybe they know? They've told me a little bit of another side before.

    I approached to meet them and asked, "What's going on?"

    "An explosion!" Teikō said, "In the Technology class!"

    Reika and I were on the same page, but it was her that inquired, "Technology?"

    "It's...that class,, metalwork and..."

    "It's for trades stuff."

    Teikō gave affirmation. Almost excited about it, he explained, "Teiko and me were just in the inside square, then we hear a big BOOM, then we're told we need to get out right away!"

    Well, that helps a little, but not by enough. They don't seem concerned, and Reika and Thatcher aren't either. Damn it. Am I the only one wondering why it happened? What's going on?


    Whatever it was, it wasn't enough to delay class further. I didn't even get to find out. Thursday passed much like Tuesday. The only difference was, Art class went better, and everyone was more on-edge. Friday started with Socials, where the hostility was at its practical maximum, and the week finally ended for me with Tactics. It was shortly after that class, when I was hanging around outside on my own due to my friends being held against their will, that the expected happened.


    I just turned and gave a stare of death.


    "No. No. No. No. No. I'm not going to train right now. No! No! No!" I made no attempt whatsoever to conceal the fact that I am not in the mood. I do not have time for this. "No! And you wanna know why? Two reasons. Number one: up yours. Number two: I got a ton of homework from that ass of a Socials teacher. I'm not even a third done, and it's due next week."

    "I'll take care of it."

    "Oh, and did I mention the third reason? Wait." Wait. What's he saying? "You're saying...what?"

    "I'll take care of the homework for you. For now, we need to do some training."

    "You can..." He can get me out of it? Seriously? He wouldn't be saying it if he couldn't, let alone so nonchalant. I'm not even a quarter of a way through this, and I was hoping something could come along to stop it. My prayers answered. Do I want to, though? This could invoke a lot of jealousy from others. But on the other hand, I guess working with Aporon is the lesser of two demons. Because seriously, to hell with that homework and Mr. Yamaguchi. Even if getting out of it will make some people hate me. Okay, more people. God damn it. "Fine, let's go."

    I don't like this. But with that being said, Aporon nodded affirmatively. He wore a smile on his face; it wasn't one of joy, but it wasn't smug either. Without a further word, he led us to our destination.


    ...good lord, there are a lot of people here at the outdoor battlegrounds. Remember when I said that it could possibly be set up in a way so that - as opposed to six small ones, it was one large battlefield? I was right. That's how it's set up. People were sitting on the bleachers and standing on the sides for the presumable spectacle about to unfold.

    "Frizzly! Hiiiii!"

    Ina came skipping up to me with a huge arm wave and huge grin. She had on the same apparel as last time I saw her, the only difference being a different colored skirt (a navy blue instead of a sky blue). She hopped with excitement in front of me.

    "All right, start talking." I said to Aporon. What in the world could he possibly have in mind this time, I mean, "What's this all about?"

    "Simple," Aporon replied with a nod. "I want you to help her win a one-on-one battle. You'll be coaching her on what to do."

    I opened my mouth to protest. But wait. I guess it could be worse than this. "Okay."

    Ina let out a squeal and led the way into the fenced partition. With a shake of my head, I followed behind with not even a fraction of the enthusiasm. I gazed across the field at our opponent. Well, two people are there. Maybe Ina's opponent is getting coached too? Well, the first is a girl in somewhat revealing attire - namely short jean shorts and a grayish-white tank top - with light blonde hair cut short. Irene Faris. And the second is a girl in pure white clothing, with braided hair pulled over her shoulder. Even from this distance and only having seen it once before, the visage belonging to Elyna Dragomir was unmistakable.

    "How did this-" I began to ask. Then I thought. Do I really want to know this? "Well, I guess that doesn't matter."

    "So where's Reirei?" Ina asked curiously.

    "She and Thatcher got detention for sneaking off to Abet's Bluff a week ago."

    "Oh, that's terrible!" Ina ditzily said. "I hope she gets through it!" Well, I guess detention could be debated as a killer. She looked over, pointing to what I'm hoping is her opponent. "That Irene girl doesn't like her at all. Oh! I forgot to ask her. How'd she break her leg?"

    "Because," I vaguely elaborated. "She snuck off to Abet's Bluff a week ago."


    "She fell."


    "From a cliff."

    "From a cliff?!"

    All right, lesson learned. Don't vaguely elaborate with this girl. "Let's just focus, okay?"


    At least she's a good listener. Picks up my mood a bit. "What Pokémon do you have? We should figure out what we're going to use."

    "Well, you already met Snowy! Hee hee!" Ina retrieved two plain - though marked - Poké Balls from her holster, and proudly showed them off to me. By which I mean shoved them right into my face, making me flinch a little. "It's just her and my longtime friend, Reedy!"

    Reedy's a Bellossom, right? And if he's her longtime friend, as she has dubbed, he should be the more experienced one, and thus, the safer bet. "Yeah, go with that."


    After replacing the one, Ina tossed (and I mean hurled) the Poké Ball into the air. This girl has one hell of a throwing arm. Out came her Bellossom, nicknamed Reedy. It stands at a little over a meter tall, with skin like a pear in tone and texture. It has two stubby little arms lacking hands, but I think I see a few thorns on the ends. The lower half of its body has been overtaken by leaves upon leaves, yellows, greens, reds, browns, and even pinks among their hues. Two large red, five-petaled flowers lie on its head. Their stigma is wide, deep, and juts out a little further than expected. Hm.

    Then there's our opponent, which was already out and I guess I somehow missed. Emphasis on somehow. The first thing about this bright-blue (and pale cream) tub they call Lapras to catch the eye would be the slate shell on its backside. Spikier than what I've seen, and believe me - I know about these friggin' things.

    I'd better refresh my memory here. I'll try to be discreet...

    Water/Ice Type

    A Pokémon with physiological traits identical to those of the ancient Sauropterygia. They strongly prefer colder waters, being native to the Arctic and Northern Pacific Oceans. However, they will migrate as far south as Taiwan during the winter months. They are among the few Pokémon to be classified as endangered by the IUCN due to poaching and oil drilling disrupting their habitat. Although a marine mammal, they have capabilities ordinarily seen in dragons.

    The horn on a Lapras' forehead develops through age, eventually becoming sharp enough to bore through ice. A longer, sharper horn is a sign of status in the pod. The thick shells on their backside have a consistency of stone. They protect from assault, but Zooarchaeology has discovered the species did not always have these. Remains dating back 50000 years have been found showing that they once used large stones as a substitute. This behavior is occasionally seen in modern Lapras, who will use anything from ice to sunken ship hulls to cover themselves.

    Lapras are peaceful, but hardy creatures. Adults are capable of going months without nourishment. They commune with smaller Pokémon, animals, and even humans to ferry them across treacherous waters. Occasionally, the biological interaction is mutualistic. Wolves in particular have been known to lash out at a Lapras' attacker, and occasionally bring scraps to younger members of the pod. Lapras themselves hunt for smaller fish and Cephalopods, but otherwise rarely engage in combat if it can be avoided.
    "So it's good for us, right?" Ina said. I jumped a little, not realizing she'd been looking over my shoulder. I hastily put my device away, thankful for her being scatterbrained. "If it doesn't wanna fight-"

    "That's in reference to wild Lapras." I pointed out. I was hoping this would have just a little more info, or more time to sift through the detailed sections, even though 'capabilities ordinarily seen in dragons' pretty much speaks for itself. "Trainer-owned ones won't show that sort of hesitation."

    "So what to do? What to do?"

    "First question. Does your Bellossom know Solarbeam?"

    "Sorry! He doesn't!" She apologized with a half-bow, half-nod. "I've been meaning to get a TM for it, though!"

    "Hm." So much for the direct route. Solarbeam is one of those attacks, if you weren't aware. You know what happens to ice in the sun, right? Well, yeah. It's a Grass move, but it's good both offensively on Ice types (highly effective), and defensely against them (as it can shield them from the cold). With that in mind, "We'll beat'em with speed. Lapras is big and really immobile on land. Bellossom is small and fast." Probably. "Er, right?"


    Then we're set. "Just make sure Bellossom doesn't get hit. Bewilder it, and outpace it, and run circles around it, and stuff like that. It might take a while, they don't go down easy, but it should work."

    "So gotta go fast?" Ina asked with a giggle. "Got it! Yay!"

    I looked over, and saw that Elyna had just finished giving words to Irene. Aporon nodded. "So if you're both ready, we can begin."

    Irene smiled confidently. "I'll follow your word to the letter, Elyna. And with your masterful advice," She flipped her hair back, summarily pointing as coldly as she declared, "This ditzy bitch is going down!"

    Either for density or jauntiness, Ina wasn't affected. She struck a flashy pose. "We can do this, Reedy! The three of us are an unstoppable team!" With this, Ina did an eager leap, shouting "Woohoo!"

    "Take it easy, you haven't won," I pointed out, with a positive, but not excessively so attitude. She cocked her head. A smile crept across my face as I whispered, "Yet." She giggled at this. We probably looked like a couple of schoolgirls gossiping. Which we actually sort of are, except for the part where I'm a guy.

    Not having heard the final word of my sentence, Elyna's posture became hostile. It was a take no prisoners attitude. "And you never will against me, Fritz." My reaction was largely the same as Ina's; that is to say, it didn't dampen my spirits in the slightest. We'll just see about that.

    Seeing the opening exchange out of the way, Aporon nodded. He gave the word, "All right, go."

    Lapras wasted no time as the signal to start the battle came. A jagged Ice Beam came out of its mouth towards, no, over the field?

    "Ina! Get them now!"

    "Energy Ball!"

    Reedy held his hands together, pulling them apart as a luminous emerald orb formed between. Like a baseball player, he drove it down the middle at a high velocity. Lapras let out a primal squeal, halting its own move as the Bellossom's made impact.

    "Hey, now," Ina asked, having acted without question, "Why'd we have to do that?"

    "They're trying to let Lapras slide around on a frozen field. If that happens, it'll be trouble."

    "Oh, I see! So what now?"

    Elyna and Irene were conversing, and the result was Lapras winding back for another Ice Beam. "You'll probably want to evade."

    "Yup!" she agreed. She flashed a wink and thumbs up to Reedy, who went on the move. He was easily able to stay ahead of the Ice Beam that was chasing him to our right, although this was placing some (but not as much as before) ice on the field. Ina once again yelled, "Energy Ball!" Bellossom performed a diving toss for no particular reason.

    Elyna said something, and Irene yelled, "Shoot it down, Lapras!" It was one thing to give the order. It was another to actually carry it out. Lapras couldn't adjust its aim in time to hit the already-in-motion attack, and took another impact.

    "Another! Woo! Another Energy Ball, Reedy!" From where it stood, Bellossom again tossed out a sphere of photosynthetic power. This time, Lapras was able to blast the attack away. Third time unlucky. And as before, an Ice Beam was on Bellossom's tail, who began running the other direction to escape. "Acid!" Reedy tensed up, slowing down for just a moment. The pursing beam started to catch up as he thrashed out his head, sending a glob of corrosive liquid from his flowers.

    "Avoid!" Irene shouted. Lapras, who had not moved an inch since the battle's start, was suddenly asked to go into motion. The subsequent bound forth with its flippers was very clumsy, but was performed in just enough time so the attack (coming in from its right) just sailed over its shell. "Now, Ice Shard!"

    Ina giggled. "Energy Ball!" A fourth dose of the move did to its opponent's attack what its opponent's attack did to the third use, only both were destroyed. "Goodsies, Reedy! Magical Leaf next!"

    Bellossom did a twirling leap, quickly spreading leaves shining in the colors of the rainbow. Lapras once again attempted to take evasive action, but found itself too slow and too large to escape the homing potshot. The move got repeated a second time, and then a third time - on this attempt, Irene shouted an order, and Lapras spewed Frost Breath at the leaves. This stopped most of them, but Reedy had been making his way around its target. On the next use, Lapras was physically unable to turn its head far enough to counter.

    Irene looked to Liane. She mouthed, "Now?" Elyna gave a firm nod of approval. Preluded by a twitch of the curly tufts on its head, Lapras exhaled a blast of frigid air around itself, enveloping its entire body in the thick Mist. Reedy halted its attacks, uncertain how to approach this. Ina also didn't know what do to.

    "Now, Lapras!"

    Suddenly, numerous Ice Shards came rocketing out from the fog. All of them impacted Bellossom roughly. Luckily, Grass are a bit weird in their weakness to ice. It's more the cold that hurts them...which is precisely what got pulled when Irene gave the command, "Frost Breath!"

    "Reedy, move in to avoid it!"

    Interesting. Moving in, I mean. Let's see where it takes her.

    "Cut, Reedy!"

    "Rock Smash, now!"

    The two attacks struck one after another. Reedy's leaf cloak rigidly came out, hacking into Lapras almost as well as a claw could. As it struck, Lapras raised its right front flipper. Despite being sliced on the chest, it went through the motion of bringing it down upon the frail form of Bellossom. A small crater was formed from the impact, which Ina's Pokémon is now stunned in.

    Irene flipped her hair and smiled. "Let's end this with Body Slam."

    Ina looked to me. Hm, "Cut again?"

    "Try Cut again!"

    Fingers crossed. Lapras bounded up as it did to dodge prior, though this time to crush its adversary. Reedy tensed up, but I managed to see him ready the attack just before he disappeared beneath the gargantuan beast. The effects were instantaneous. Lapras shrieked in pain, tipping over onto its side with a thunderous crash.

    "Ewwwwwwwww!!" Ina winced at the sight of blood oozing from her foe's sensitive underside? Ow. I guess that's what happens when you fall onto a sharp object. "I didn't mean to do that, sorry!" Ina was begging forgiveness. It's uncommon to see a laceration go that deep in a battle, let alone by accident or by a non-violent Pokémon.

    A moment after, Bellossom managed to crawl out. No doubt, that tiny crater was what kept it in this. Though woozy, he's still standing. Unfortunately, Lapras still has more left in it too. It managed to pull itself up, sort of. It's kinda hunched over right now, as if it's trying to catch its breath. Elyna and Irene huddled together to converse.

    "So...what now? Healsies?" Ina was still feeling a little down over hurting it, afraid to make eye contact with me.

    "A good start, yeah." If it can heal its wounds, that's definitely the place to begin. As to where to go from there, "It might be better to stay back at this point, even though you limit its options up close."

    "Hey! Hey!" She lit up, becoming positive again. "Could we get up on the Lapras' back?!"

    "Maybe." Holy shit that is so obvious and such a dick move and why didn't I think of that? "It's risky, though." For a Bellossom yes, but for more agile Pokémon...

    "Okays!" squealed Ina. "Mega Drain, Reedy!"

    The other trainer and her coach had to snap back to the action for the impulsive command. Elyna continued to speak as Bellossom went in near enough to perform the move. Several clear orbs got sent at Lapras. Glowing spheres returned along and around an invisible track into Reedy's body, and with each one that burst into light on contact, he stood up a little taller. His cloak even looked a little healthier at the end.

    "If they're staying up close," Irene started as Elyna stopped talking, "Then Rock Smash again!" This time, Reedy was faster, fluidly dodging to the right of the hefty appendage.

    "Stun Spore, Reedy!" Ina giggled, stressing the final syllable. A plume of orange dust shot out from his flowers. It spread over Lapras' lower body. Which had no effect. And everyone just stood there awkwardly.

    Powder-based attacks need to be breathed in to be effective, or at least scattered onto an open wound. And Ina...I guess didn't know that.

    "You're kidding me, right?" Irene said, stifling a laugh. "You said you've had this for how long now? And you-"

    An idea flashed over Ina's face as she was being talked down. She kept motioning while whispering "go", prompting her Pokémon to subtly try to sneak around its foe. One of its arms began to glow a brownish hue, and it looked prepped to climb. They're going for it!

    "Pay attention!" Elyna scolded, having noticed. Damn it. Irene was taken aback a bit.

    "Oh. Rock Smash it away!"

    Well, it was more of a bitchslap than what was seen before, but this knocked Reedy far back. Lapras got right back to creating more ice. On Ina's word and her Bellossom's decent recovery, the plant pitched another Energy Ball his foe's way. This time, though, Lapras was able to slide away on what it created. Once it hit a larger patch of ice, it breathed out some more Mist, that enveloped it entirely.

    "Now, start attacking as planned, Lapras!"

    And that's about the time crap started flying everywhere. Pale gas - both snow-like Frost Breath, and slightly yellow Dragonbreath were being spat out at random intervals and in random places. Bellossom was dodging in a panic, an emotion also seen in his trainer.

    "How is it attacking so accurately?!" she cried. I couldn't open my mouth before she said, "I can't see it! How can it see us?! It shouldn't be able to see us!"


    "But maybe it can hear us! Yay!" She did a jumping jack. "Round, Reedy, Round!"

    Well, I was going to say that it's still there and able to be hit, and judging by the erratic way it's attacking it probably couldn't see Reedy either, but that works too! Bellossom stood still in a prayer-like stance. An odd, yet pleasant sound flowed softly from his vocal chords. I'm supposing he's focusing it onto Lapras, but regardless, the exhales stopped coming. Lucky.

    "That's a TM move, isn't it?" I remarked aloud. "It seems better at using it than how Glaceon used TMs."

    "What do you mean?" Ina overheard, querying me with a goofy smile that only become goofier. "Hee hee! Reedy loves to sing and dance! He loved to dance, so he should love to sing! Sing and dance!" Lapras came crawling out of its shroud, visibly shaken. "And speaking of dance- hey, what was that?"

    For a split second, Lapras' eyes flashed crimson. And it looked...I dunno how to describe it. Different, in a word?

    "What'd it do just there just now?"

    "Probably nothing." At least, I hope it was nothing. The spectators didn't seem to see it, though.

    "Anyways, like I was saying. Speaking of dance, Teeter Dance!"

    Reedy was moving awkwardly after the initial hit by Body Slam, but these exaggerated motions were like that to a factor of ten. With added spinning. And luminescence. Lapras' attention was drawn to the dazzling technique. Irene will probably want it to go back into its hiding spot, if she can get it to.

    "Say," I asked slyly, "Is that the only dance move your Bellossom knows?" Ina simply giggled in confirmation. This'll be good. "Try telling it to use both at the same time!"

    "All right, Frizzly! Reedy, use Teeter Dance and Petal Dance both at the same time!"

    Reedy showed a bit of hesitance in his step for a moment, but within seconds managed to surround himself with a tornado-like barricade of blossoms. He then went on the move, taking a chaotic course towards his helplessly entranced foe.

    "Water Pulse! Water Pulse! Water Pulse! Water Pulse! Water Pulse!" shouted Irene repeatedly, in a determined, desperate, and...damn it, a successful attempt to get through. The ringed orb freaking homed right in on Reedy, splashing harshly and halting his motion on the spot. It just had to be homing.

    "Lapras, BLIZZARD!!!"

    Well, that's that. The Bellossom was blasted by the snowstorm expelled from its foe's gaping maw. The final order that Irene proceeded to give, a Body Slam, was just insult to injury.

    "Aww," Ina recalled her Pokémon disappointedly, "That sucked." Her mild response to her loss didn't stop Irene and Lapras from celebrating with bravado. But then there was her coach.

    Elyna just stared at me in an odd way. She turned it onto Ina, and then did a sort of half turn. "You did okay," she admitted, any sort of positive notion fading when she continued, "But it's a insult that idiots like you should be allowed to use such majestic Ice-type Pokémon." With that, she walked away.

    "Majestic Ice-type Pokémon?" Ina cocked her head. "Hee hee! That's a silly way of putting it!"

    "Maybe she really likes them or something?" A thought occurs though. How did she know Ina had a Glaceon?

    "Oh, you didn't know?" Irene bragged with a smug grin. It mutated into a wicked one as she gave the 411, "Elyna Dragomir was taught from a young age by the late, great Lorelei. Master Ice trainer and former member of the Kanto Elite Four. She is well along the path to following in the footsteps of her mentor!" Aporon gave affirmation that this was not made-up. "Even when she lived in her and my native Orange Islands, she had earned her nickname - The Ice Princess."

    The Kanto Elite Four. That's not good. At least it's not one in the flesh I'm dealing with. But if she was trained of them, then why is she here? Intriguing.

    "Wow! That's so cool! No wonder you won!"

    I take back anything good I said about Ina. I have some choice words, but Aporon is motioning for me again. This wasn't too bad at least, but it could very well just be the calm before the storm.


    Later on in the evening, I was brought back to the second-year dorms. Aporon politely knocked and waited. The door opened after a few seconds, and the prep greeted us. He nodded, and calmly returned to sit on a bed in the room. After Aporon went in, I followed behind. And a spectacle awaited me.

    "What the hell is this?"

    Lawrence and Edgar are towering over a girl. I'd say she's about an inch over five feet, that is to say, still taller than Lawrence. She has long, black hair wrapped by a laurel headband in tune with the rest of her apparal. They have her dressed like how a maid would be clothed. A French maid, anyway. Tears are streaming from her emerald eyes, running down her rose-tinted face and onto the cold floor. She's desperately scrubbing with a simple brush, the kind you'd use to wash your hands.

    "If you are concerned about these circumstances, Fritz Westmyn," the prep addressed, as if he'd been expecting and preparing for this very question, "Do not be. They have not been doing anything illegal."

    "Yeah, just fuckim' enbarrassing." Edgar snorted emotionlessly. He took a swig from the soda can he held in his hand. He peered down, a devilish smirk on his mug. Edgar belched loudly and splashed the remainder onto the floor and into the girl's face. "Clean it up, bitch."

    "Yeah, heh heh. Clean it up. Clean yourself up. Dirty girl, heh heh."

    "What. The hell. Is this." The prep tried to get words out, but I continued in utter awe, "No, I wanna know. What the hell does this have to do with...anything?" This is Phoebe Palmoni, my partner for the tournament, isn't it...? I thought I had it bad, but she has it worse. She helplessly peeked up at me as she cleaned, as if to plead for a savior.

    "Yes," agreed Aporon. It feels so wrong to be on the same page as him, even if our motivations are different. "What's your angle for this training?"

    "To experience humility is an inevitability of a battle. Such emotion would be expected to come forth from a crushing loss." The prep's confidence was simply overflowing. Aporon nodded in approval. "Ergo, we have placed her in a humiliating position, so that she may learn to cope sooner, rather than later." Those were his words, yet the well-dressed young man then provided full transparency. He leaned over to his two partners in crime, whispering loud enough to heard, "You two owe me for that."

    "That's right. And now you, shithead." Edgar's eyes were like bullets, and his voice a dagger. "Time for you to clean, too."

    "Oh, sure. Fine." I didn't think myself capable of sarcasm that dramatic. But that's the tone I used as I cracked my knuckles. I moved towards my aggressor. "I'll start by cleaning your clock."

    "Relax, Westmyn." Aporon calmly interposed between us, sparing his associate from being served a knuckle sandwich. "You don't have to clean anything."

    "So what do you want me to do? Huh?"

    "Nothing, I think you've both had enough training for one day." He stroked his tiny beard in thought. "Help her turn it in."


    "That is to say," the prep said to me, apparently picking up on it, "Escort her back to her room."

    "That's it?"

    "That is it."

    Really, what the hell is this? All eyes are on me. I haven't the faintest idea where they could be going with this, assuming it's not simply what it is at face value. Phoebe stood to her feet, about as uneasy as I am about this. We surveyed the four, and then one another. No one was saying anything, no one was doing anything.

    With strained posture, Phoebe quietly gathered a few possessions, including a modest blue duffel bag. Lawrence stifled a giggle when she got near. He motioned for Edgar to trip her as she passed by, but Aporon shook his head. A good call. Phoebe didn't notice these proceedings, appearing lost in her own world. She paid me no heed, until she stood before the door. She stopped and lowered her head, twisting back as if to ask if I was coming.

    With a look to the other four in the room, I accepted perforce. As I was about to exit, I turned and gave a final glare to them. Yet discretion is the better part of I decided to keep my mouth shut, lest I aggravate things.

    The two of us shared an awkward silence as we left Lawrence's room. It's reasonably late, so some students are in their dorms. I hesitate to call it noisy, but it's clearly not quiet. A few loitered in the halls; as we passed them by, they gave stares that unnerved even myself. Only slightly.

    When we had made it up two floors, Phoebe stopped. She ran back to the stairwell; checking if we were being followed? She seemed relieved, and with that began to talk. "They were making me do that for hours!" she cried. "And before that..."

    Silence. I'm not sure what I could say to respond to that. Do I give false hope? Do I be brutally honest? Maybe I should try to help her relate. Yeah. "At least they didn't make you drink from the lake or force you to run laps."

    She composed herself long enough to say, "They did make me run laps."

    More silence. Again, I was uncertain of how to reply. I decided to share my experiences today. "Today, I first had to coach someone intolerable in a battle," I said with a sigh. It was a mild exaggeration, but I'm looking at the intents. Not necessarily how it turned out. "And if I talked about all the other little stuff after, I'd be going over it all night."

    A third bout. This time, Phoebe didn't know how to proceed. I only noticed now our speed had slowed to a crawl. Eventually, she rasped, "Why are they doing this to us?"

    "I don't know..." I honestly don't know. Maybe I was confident before, but at this point, I'm not. "Maybe they honestly believe what they're saying. But they may just as well just be seeking justification for this torture."

    "Torture," she mused. "That's a good word to describe it."

    "But why? Why are they doing this?" Phoebe's lament is beginning to rub off on me. I consider myself a positive person, yet at this point in time, I can't help but feel crestfallen about these circumstances myself. It was essentially with a weep that she beseeched, "I know my sister isn't the best person in the world...but why do they hate me too?"

    "Some people just do, unfortunately..." I maintained my composure, for her sake. "It's not right."

    The next flight of steps felt like scaling a mountain. My legs were simply did not want to obey my command, and on my forcing, were not going quietly. This situation bothered me before. But now, having seen another side of the picture...I just don't know what to do about it. I just don't see Phoebe as the type of person who could do anything to invoke their wrath. So that has to be the reason they're treating her as they are. It just has to be.

    "Well, we're here." Phoebe said, the moment we stood before her room. Like me, she had chosen a dorm on the quiet top floor. She fumbled around her outfit, patting herself down to find her key. Accidentally dropping the chain after locating it made her turn red in embarrassment. She hastily picked it up, unlocked, and opened the door. Phoebe abruptly paused, holding it wide open, then turned to look at me.

    "We'll probably see each other tomorrow...won't we?"

    "Knowing them, more than likely."

    She sighed. "I hope it's not as bad as today."

    "We can only hope."

    Being honest with myself, those are high hopes. That fact is not lost on Phoebe, either. She shut her eyes tight and shuddered. Dread was rightfully in her outlook. Those four could be planning anything. We've made it so far, though. I know we'll make it through this, too!

    When my partner in this tournament noticed my poise, it seemed to put her at ease. "Well..." Phoebe said as her frown dissipated, "Good night."


    She waved meekly as I went on my way. This has been one hell of a week. Things are happening so fast and so erratically. Sometimes it's felt like it's been moving at a high velocity, at other moments things have slowed down. So much information to process all at once. And there's still Saturday left.

    It's the weekend though. That has to be better. I hope.
    Don't know what to put here.

  8. #38
    It wasn't much! Flaze's Avatar Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Why do you care
    Blog Entries
    Add Flaze on Facebook
    Follow Flaze on Tumblr Visit Flaze's Youtube Channel

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Well I'm done for one.

    So like I said in VMs there were some parts where I felt a bit thrown off by the pace, but everyone has their own feelings about these things so it's not like I can assume. However, I do admit that the chapter in itself wasn't too bad, the lowest point was the battle though, it just felt kind of slow to me for some reason though maybe I'm just too picky with battles so don't pay too much attention.

    Teiko and Teiko with the thing that I can't type in a laptop. Interesting joke if I do say so myself. Then there's the teachers, it was nice seeing them, but their classes felt a bit rushed to say the least, I can understand that you wanted to show the first day back again and it was good to see the characters back to class but there were some things that felt a little bit pointless even if they were pretty funny xD such as the art class, yes it brought a lot of humor to the chapter and showed how their teacher wasn't actually capable of being one but overall I felt that it was a part that could've been skipped or summarized in one paragraph.

    It was nice to see Fritz and Ina get along with each other, which is why I felt bad when he went back to his usual attitude cause I acually like Ina a lot cause of how different she is from the rest of the characters, yes she's dumb as a brick but that's a nice change of pace. I do notice that a lot of your characters seem be...kind of bitter xD or maybe too serious but that's actually a funny thing cause most of my characters are quirky and light-hearted.

    It was nice to finally see Phoebe and I have to admit her introduction was a good moment in the chapter, I honestly wanted Fritz to just punch the lights out of Aporon's lackeys for what they did even if it was just embarrassing her and that's really really bad in and on itself.

    I can't wait for the next chapter especially that now I'm curious as to what's going to happen with the competition, though we're still far off from then xD

  9. #39
    Christmas Bubble Frog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Blog Entries

    Follow Bubble Frog on Tumblr

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Chapter 2-3: In Seek of Sanctum
    I mean, Reika's Wigglytuff - which she's had for a while - being beat by a Pokémon someone's owned for only two weeks? Thatcher may have been iffy to begin with, but Aporon...
    This isn't huge, but being less vague in moments like this would really help make a better impression. Saying that Reika had Wigglytuff for six months give more of an impression of Ina's Glaceon's power than saying she had it for six weeks for example.

    Anyway, this was a nice little aftermath chapter. There's is a massive amount in general to comment on so I'll keep things short, Thatcher's Contest shenanigans and winning those ticket and something I'm wondering whether or not will have an impact on anything in the future and, of course, what of the fourth ticket? Also the scene with the Dean, I get the feeling this is all mounting up to something that's right under my nose that I'm not catching. It does seem to be foreshadowing something important though, well aside from the usual antagonist spiel. Liane reappears, well that was unexpected I wonder how things will continue to change from this point on...gotta a theory or two I think.

    Onward to the next chapter, it was quite weird to see Ina and Fritz working together considering Reika despises the former for some reason. Aporon's "training" certainly is quite particular, it doesn't seem like Fritz's Pokemon themselves are training to become stronger and Aporon still doesn't come off as a massive jerk-face. He's a bit vain and overbearing at times but doesn't seem to do many fundamentally wrong things, his cronies however are pretty villain-ish and obnoxious. The ending with Phoebe was quite, quite dunno weird. Aporon literally had her as a maid and cleaning things up for them, his philosophy on why he did that seems warped. For a second I thought there might have been some perverted tendencies behind the maid thing but didn't expect to see her going through all that. The battle was entertaining as was seeing the results of Fritz's little vacation from school and the fire.

    They protect from assault, but Zooarchaeology has discovered the species did not always have these.
    Zoo archaeology

    "So it's good for us, right?" Ina said. I jumped a little, not realizing she'd been looking over my shoulder. I hastily put my device away, thankful for her being scatterbrained. "If it doesn't wanna fight-"
    Really cute moment for Ina. :P
    "Yeah, just fuckim' enbarrassing." Edgar snorted emotionlessly.
    Just some spelling errors, "embarrassing" and should just be "emotionless."

    That's it for now, a pair of solid chapters.

  10. #40
    Poet Laureate AiedailEclipsed's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    In my own realm...
    Blog Entries
    Follow AiedailEclipsed On Twitter Add AiedailEclipsed on Facebook

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Oooh, thank you for that tidbit. It's nice to get those! ;) Anywho, onto the chappie! Starts off nice and slow, which is good, I think. You can't have them all going a mile a minute. And Thatcher is adorable as per the usual; though, I wonder what he was trying to say at that first bit of biology. Oh, hey it's the random question mark! Oh, you. Gotta love when those pop out of no where. And hey, it's Cronus being a creeper and popping out of holes in the wall! Gotta love it when he does that.

    "She sleeked over to him." Sleeked over to him. Sleeked. Dear God. It's like innuendo incarnated into a word. And lol. She be trying to seduce dem single boys. Scandalous. And the whole "MISTER MEAN TEACHER MAAAAAN" is hilarious (I'm sorry, I'm just a bundle of jokes today). Well, it's hilarious for me, but not for Fritz and co. And it gets better! Gotta love Shugiri either way though. She's my bro. Yay random explosions.

    Oh hey, Fritz has to tutor someone in ba- OH MY GOD. ITS ELYNA! Yay! And dear sweet Lord, bless that child. She is just so clueless (Ina, btw). "She fell." "Huh?" "From a cliff." [/deadpan]

    ON TO THE BATTLE! Bellossom vs Lapras. I do love it when you customize Pokémons' appearances just slightly. It really gives a certain... charm? To your story. Enough of me being crazy! Not even gonna bother with recapping most of the battle (tl;dr much?) Although, the Stun Spore moment. Priceless. I literally couldn't stop laughing. And a Lapras bitchsmacking Bellossom is now forever imprinted into my mind. Thank you. My life is complete.

    Hokay. So, I'm calling it. Ina is officially crazy. I can literally hear the hysterical, demented note in her voice when she talks to Fritz about Round. AND HEY LAPRAS BEING A CREEPER ALL RED EYED AND SHIT. Yay for awkward moments. And woo. Homing orbs of an aquatic nature. But yeah. Irene won, so by proxy Elyna won. Go girly! *waves pompoms* Anywho. I still definitely think this was not my best work. Although, if you do that thing that we talked about with her and him then it'll all come together in the end and I won't feel quite so incompetent. SO DO THE THING YOU WHORE.

    Oooh, hey Elyna backstory tidbits. Moving on. I'm just gonna gloss over this last bit which just rings a bit too close to like rape, for my taste. I SENSE A ROMANTIC LOVE INTEREST THOUGH! *gleeful cackle*

    Anywho. I loved this chapter. It was great. A nice(ish) battle. Lots of information, character appearances. I'm not sure if I caught any grammatical errors, but I wasn't going over it with a fine tooth comb. On that note, @Gotpika ; The "fuckim' enbarrassing" bit is intentional as it is a play on Edgar's dyslexia. I do look forward to the next chapter though. Isn't this one coming up where we get to see more of the mysterious girl (dear Lord, I need a name for this bitch)? SO TILL NEXT TIME MY DARLING! So probably till tonight, you say?
    "Be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it."
    -- Narrator, Pokemon: Jirachi Wish Maker
    "You can't change the world without getting your hands dirty."
    -- Lelouch Lamperouge, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion
    "Do I have a stamp on my forehead that says, 'The National Spokesperson for the Plight of Black People'? How the hell should I know the black perspective on The Color Purple? That's it, if I don't change classes, I'm gonna hurt this fool. Teachers treat me like I'm some kind of Rosetta stone for African-Americans. What? Black people learn how to read, and we all miraculously come to the same conclusion?"
    -- Victoria, Freedom Writers
    "N's heart is pure and innocent. But there is nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence."
    -- Concordia, Pokémon Black/White 2

  11. #41
    THE CULT OF PERSONALITY System Error's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Blog Entries

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World



    Chapter 2-5: Showoff Showdown

    The heralding of the weekend did nothing to soothe the nerves of the student body, and there's no better example than Phoebe and I. We're currently sitting in Lawrence's room before our mentor in the tournament, the room's co-owner (the other and his possible lover isn't present), and their two pals.

    I'm alert and prepared, in contrast to Phoebe's resigned sorrow. She's wearing ordinary clothes today; namely, a black T-shirt with a circular design of sort in the middle, and dark gray sweatpants. A patchwork red and white headwrap neatly shields her raven hair. Her face states that she wishes it could cover her whole body.

    "So," Aporon was the first to address us, "This is the first time we've got you two together. This is a Multi Battle tournament. You're going to have to train together as well as on your own."

    Edgar was relaxed, at least for his standards. He was more wily than vehement while asking the question that was on all six of ours' minds, "So what should we make them do?"

    The four began to think about this. Phoebe and I could only tensely await their decision. Aporon stroked his beard. The prep crossed his arms and looked up the the ceiling, while the nerd placed his on his knees as he gazed at the floor. Edgar remained where he was. That is to say, leaning against a wall, staring at us wickedly. Then, Lawrence snapped up, cackling.

    "Heheh...make out."

    The four friends laughed hard. "Not a bad idea!" the prep stated, "You two should make out."

    Phoebe's face went flush red. She looked at me, then scooted about a foot away, putting up her arms in protest. "No! I...I'm not going to do THAT!"

    "Okay," My reaction also involved the aforementioned color, though it was concentrated in my retinas. "What does THIS have to do with training?" Aporon mumbled something to himself under his breath. He seems to know where they're going, but is allowing them to explain. The norm for him.

    "It's like, er, hey!"

    "The most effective teams in Double Battles have been shown to be the ones who know one another well."

    "Yeah, so you two should like...heh heh...REALLY get to know each other!"

    "But," Phoebe protested. Squinting tightly, she turned her even redder face away from me. "!

    "Not that I'm adverse to kissing her," I began, far more composed about this scenario than my partner could hope to be, "But I think you two just made that up. So why don't you test your theory?



    That was a lie. I'm not composed. I can't stop laughing to myself. "Lawrence, why don't YOU make out with your preppy friend? And make out like you mean it, too." Trying so hard to keep a straight face. I don't know how I'm succeeding in tone, but my expression has to look retarded right now. "Then me and Phoebe will battle you guys. If you win, she and I do whatever you want together. But if we win, you guys need to lay off. Do we have a deal?"

    "I-um...don't want to..."

    "My name is David. And the answer is no."

    That shut them up. Let's keep piling it on! "Not your type? That's cool, that's cool. We could always get Edgar in on it instead."

    "Fuck you."

    "Westmyn," Aporon scolded.

    "Fine, fine!" I said with a roll of my eyes. "I'll play ball."

    Before Phoebe could react, I leaned over and gave her a peck on the cheek. It was more polite, or even gentlemanly than anything else. The prep, David, scoffed at this.

    "You call that making out?"

    "It's a start!" Walked right into it. "Besides, how would you know what making out is? I haven't seen any one of you jackasses hanging out with a girl. So why don't you shut the fuck up?"

    "Westmyn. There's simply no need for that." When Aporon is calming me down, however marginal the effect, things are just bad. "Now, I had a couple things lined up for the two of you today, but I like your idea better!"

    His goons responded with shock and revulsion that forced him to clarify, "I meant the battling. Not the kissing." They breathed a sigh of relief. I fully mean it though when I say that if he did make them do that, I'd take back everything I said about him. Aporon stood to his feet and stretched. "Now, it won't be any of them you'll be up against. So I have to go arrange something. Your Pokémon do need some training themselves, anyway. Just choose one each and try to coordinate something. I'll be back in ten."


    "That could've gone better." I remarked with a rub of my hair after we had gotten through a battle. We'd faced and defeated two teams thus far, but the second was closer than it should have been. Nidorina just didn't mesh with Phoebe's Floatzel at all, unlike Huntail. Though, both duels were more simultaneous one-on-ones than possessing anything resembling teamwork.

    "I'm just glad they haven't done anything horrible so far," Phoebe said. "But the really bad stuff has to be coming, right?" The battles had been a pleasant alternative for me, but she just wasn't feeling it. Without a doubt, that's directly linked to her pessimism.

    "So," I replied with a confident smile, "Why don't we leave before they get the chance?" Aporon and company had scattered about, not keeping watch on us. Edgar left for food, Lawrence had gone off somewhere, the prep and Aporon had gone to get our next opponents. We were told to wait for them, but what's there stopping us? Certainly not any random person.

    Confusion washed over her as I moved towards the main building. "Come on!" I urged and motioned. "Let's hurry!"

    Wasting no time, I speedwalked towards our destination on the second floor of the school. Fast enough to make good time, but not so fast as to draw unwanted attention. The only delay to my pace was the door, but it was a trite obstacle in the grand scheme of things. Before I knew it, I was before a room just two to the right of the library. My timing was impeccable.

    "Thatcher, are we ready to go?" I asked, still on the approach the moment he stepped out of the doorway. We had it all planned out.

    "Y-yes..." Today's the day of the big contest. His nerves are inert, which frankly, shocks the hell out of me. Neither is he overtly enthusiastic, though. Probably, the two are balancing each other out. He stood on his toes, peering over my shoulder. "Um, but where's Phoebe?"

    Oh. I guess I lost her somewhere along the way, or she didn't follow? My idea was to take her as our fourth, so I could help her escape from Aporon as well. Also because Teiko and Teikō are a pair, and we couldn't just take one. "I dunno. Where's Reika?"

    "She...she said she would...with her crutch...take too long. She felt really bad." That may have been the case, but Thatcher seemed to be feeling worse about it. "And she has a headache...and, you know-"

    "All right, where are you shithead?!"

    I instinctively ducked into the doorway. Thatcher froze up, and I didn't need to peek out to know that a more incensed than ever before Edgar was there. I used my friend's going slack as a sign to emerge. He must've ran the other direction.

    "He...he looks...real mad, Fritz."

    Today's been moving at breakneck pace. It's fluid though, and I'm riding the waves. Yeah! "He'll be even madder when he can't find me anywhere here! Let's go!"

    Thatcher got it right away, and we bolted down the stairs. His mood picked right up. It took just over a minute to get out of the gate. There's no stopping us! We let out a cheer as we left the ground, and kept our pace as we charged forth!


    It's finally time. Thatcher and I are but two drops in this tub filled to the brim with contest enthusiasts. Their raised hands and thunderous plaudits made it akin to being in a raging ocean. And they're just in anticipation at present!

    When a figure emerged from the gorilla position at 1PM on the dot, that sent them into overdrive. A man almost as wide as he is tall, in blue work overalls and trucker's hat, with a white shirt beneath made the crowd go berserk. I can't say for certain from these nosebleed seats, but does he shave much? I can't really tell. But...

    "Man," I couldn't help but remark to my friend, "I never expected a coordinator to look like that."

    "Looks can be deceiving, Fritz!" Thatcher was confident, more than happy to explain to me. And stating a credo I know all too well. "That's Ward Whalz, second-generation pupil of the legendary Juan de Maréaux!" Believe it or not, I recognize the name. I forgot from what, but I know of the guy. "Just like him and Wallace, he's a former Gym Leader of Sootopolis City, a Top Coordinator, and a Water Pokémon master. His personal thing is his line of Pokémon health-care and grooming products!"

    The crowd simmered down a little as the host approached the stage. His voice is as elegant as his clothing, demonstrated when he said, "Welcome to the first official Whalz Cup. This contest today is dedicated to my mentor. Get well soon." He took off his hat in respect, displaying his almost-bald head. That was enough to silence most of the crowd. For a brief moment, anyway. "Never been keen on introductions as you all know. So let's get to it and introduce the eight that'll be competing here today."

    A man in his late 20s emerged from backstage. "First, from Zurich, Switzerland. Introductions aren't necessary for the one called Gavin Seaforth." The crowd gave a mix of cheers and jeers towards this tall fellow, with a dress that clearly came from society's upper echelon. "Second, we got someone from this region here. Once a thug in a street gang, now the muscle of the hustle. From Hearthome City, Sinnoh. Stuart the Kidd." And muscle he had. In fact, he still donned his colors as a fashion statement, too. But the crowd showered the regional coordinator (who looks to be in his early-30s) with praise all the same.

    "Next. From Gattai Memoire, Korea, we got a girl who gave up her life to chase a dream. Her name is Chiyun Kwon." Now that first guy was high class, but this young lady didn't need fanciful clothes to tell you that (they were actually teetering on casual). She just had that air about her; even if Whalz had said nothing about it, one'd still be able to sense her origins. She received a reasonably warm welcome.

    "A veteran of the dome. Entertaining people for over 35 years. He's been Top Coordinator three times, but has vowed to win the title of Grand Master before he retires. From the Badlands of Orre, The Poffin Man himself...Randy Hulette!" The loudest pop yet. His technicolor outfit is so outlandish, it'd be stupid to even begin describing it. He's got to be in his 50s or even 60s, but age has treated him well. Unlike certain 66-year-old douchebags.

    "From Saffron City, Kanto. The hardest working effort coordinator, and runner-up in last year's Johto Grand Festival. Celeste Faris!" Well, that answers my question from a couple weeks back, but I still don't see the resemblance to her cousin, Irene. Maybe she's too far removed, maybe she takes after the other side of the family. Who knows? The crowd likes her, that's all I can tell you.

    "Another guy from this region." As before, the crowd lit up at this. "Love'em or hate'em, he knows how to get a response. Some call him the face of the future. Some call him a threat to our sanctity. He just calls himself a coordinator. A fourth-generation star of appeals from Floaroma, Augustus Gabriel!" Thatcher nearly sprang high out of his seat, startled by the sudden increase in volume. To me, the almost unanimously positive reaction isn't that big a surprise. Floaroma's the next township over. With such a close proximity, of course he'd be hailed as a hometown hero. And he was basking in the electricity in his frilled white and green robe. It was almost visible when he cast it off, revealing a similarly-toned suit that could befit a figure skater or even a superhero.

    "One of the country's biggest foreign stars. Grew up on the rough streets of the great dividing line. Some said he'd be a Pokémon Champion some day, but he went this path. One-time Top Coordinator. From Krasnoyarsk, East Russia...Igor Wylde!" People didn't respond too well to this guy, who was not looking at all like I was expecting when I thought of Russians. Maybe they're hating him for who he is, because East Russia follows Japan's way of thought.

    "Finally..." The crowd, including Thatcher, prepared themselves for what was to come. "This young woman has been called the finest coordinator to never to get near the top. Been seeking glory for six years now all across the country. A tale of success in the face of adversity. She hails from Petalburg City, Hoenn, and's been voted most enthralling celebrity of Japan two years running. Everyone. Maribel...Capdevila!"

    Thatcher sprang high, this time with intent. The exuberance provided was almost equal to that of Augustus Gabriel. I'd say it just falls short, but I couldn't hear a single boo to compensate.

    From the halls marched a young woman with an outfit that could make my cousin Estelle jealous. Seemingly simple, yet practically not. Like...where do I begin here? Most of her apparel is a strawberry tint. A vest over a black undershirt with long sleeves, matching shoulder cloth, and what looks like the lower half of a dress or a huge skirt. Her hair flows like a river of scarlet, but it's not the only fluid thing on her person - a dark cloak or cape ripples behind her as well. Black heels, long white socks that extend who knows how far into the aforementioned dress, and a big blue bow tie.

    "YEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Thatcher has to be a serious contender for most delighted person in the arena at the moment, if not the world. It's really nice seeing him happy like this.

    The eight participants lined up before Whalz. "All right, so you all entered your six Pokémon. Now let's get right down to talkin' about how this'll work. First round. Eight enter, four leave. You all use one Pokémon apiece. Simple. Second round. Two Pokémon to a side, two coordinators who advance. Last round. The best of three performances. Winner gets the Whalz Ribbon. Worth eight points for any region. The catch here is, you can only use a Pokémon once."

    "Neat concept," I whispered to Thatcher, "I've never heard of anything like this before."

    "Yeah," he said, "These kinds of contests are really unique!"

    "You'd have to think about which Pokémon to use and when."

    "Maribel would want to save her best Pokémon for the fights she'd really need them on!"

    I smiled to myself. I wasn't expecting him to pick up on that. "And on the other hand, she doesn't want to be too conservative, or she might lose early. Depending on how well she knows her opponents too, she might have to consider all potential possibilities."

    Whalz began to speak once more. "The matchups will proceed according to seeding. First up. Number two against number seven. Higher seed gets the benefit of choosing second this round."

    The East Russian - and again, I'd like to stress the fact that I would not believe he was from that country if I was not told so - marched over to onto one side of the battlefield. As the other six made their way back, The Kidd strided into position opposite Wylde, sending out his Pokémon first. A tree-like demon, face and back covered by silky white fur. It's got a sharp nose, goblin ears, a solid body of redwood, and fanblade-like leaves for hands.

    It was put up against a vaguely humanoid blob with hair just as long and pale, but being frozen being the cause for the tone instead. A dark form shrouding itself in a vermillion and citrine robe. Pouty lips and twisted arms jut out from its body.

    "So who do you think's gonna win this one?" I asked Thatcher. He'd know better than me.

    "Huh?" he started, "I dunno, I never really...paid attention to either of them. Too much. But..." He seemed to be musing something.

    "Ice is normally good on Grass," I pointed out, placing an educated guess on their typings forward.

    "But Dark is good on Psychic, isn't it?" Thatcher asked. When I nodded to confirm that is the general case, he told me, "Shiftry is Grass and Dark, but Jynx is Ice and Psychic. A normal battle, I guess it'd be about even...but in a contest, and with these two, I dunno."

    Little by little, I think I'm starting to get it. I have to admit, I was a little skeptical going in. But this is pretty enjoyable so far. It's not often I get to spend time with my friends either, with the situation being how it is, so that's a plus as well. With the two Pokémon out, Ward Whalz took a seat at a table on the sidelines, alongside four other individuals.

    "Get ready for contests, all! Begin the matchup!"


    As the tournament played out, Igor Wylde had a good back and forth with Stuart the Kidd, before kicking it up and trouncing him soundly. The Poffin Man with Magmar and Celeste Faris with Solrock went to the judge's panel. They gave the nod to the former, which the crowd wasn't too happy about.

    Next came the match involving Thatcher's idol. This one ended pretty uniquely. Seaforth's Manectric pulled out a Wild Charge, but Capdevila's Mawile caught it in its jaw, tossed it, then fired the conducted electricity out for the KO. In Augustus Gabriel vs. Chiyun Kwon, the latter's Venomoth attempted a powder display, which was foiled by a simple blast of water from the former's Wartortle. It wasn't affected directly by the stream, but the good news ended there for the Korean performer. Her Pokémon ultimately fell by virtue of a Rapid Spinning Hydro Pump.

    He then found himself being confronted by Capdevila. The two glared at each other from about three feet away. Words were exchanged. No one could hear them, the content of the trash talk being left to the imagination. Gabriel eventually moved and retrieved a microphone.

    "Say what you want. You're on my turf now, Maribel. Here in Moldeau Town, Sinnoh!" Though many of these people had to be from across the nation, they still ate right out of his hand. He had a deterministic twinkle in his eye. Or maybe it was a tear. "I'm not going to lose to you. I can't lose to you! Not today!"

    The crisp reply was audible. "You've nerve, but nerve only goes so far."

    Thatcher nudged me. "This is really personal," he whispered, "I know they've had a heated rivalry, but this know, it's...something new."

    "Must be the setting," I suggested. "Or maybe the stakes." Either or both would be a factor for these changes.

    That little incident was followed by a thirty-minute break. The second round of the contest began in the precise manner the first round ended. Two hated rivals, staring each other down.

    Capdevila grasped two capsules between fingers. She threw them with style and grace, which garnered a cheer before they even emerged.

    The first one. It's...a shrub? Not exactly the most intimidating of Pokémon, but that's contests, I guess. Even though a creature as black as the night is cloaked within - with a pointy nose and four crested horns - it's actually more cute than anything else. Its grassy body is top-shaped, and I guess it gets around with either tiny little legs or by hopping. Maybe spinning. I'll find out soon, I suppose.

    Her other is a mustached tub of lard, that briefly reminded me of Lapras. Its glossy body is primarily a sky blue, with a sunny patch on its belly and some cloudy white spots. This thing is sort of an eggplant shape. A deformed eggplant, anyway.

    "Wow!" exclaimed Thatcher. "I was expecting her to use her Wormadam on Augustus, but I never knew she had a Sealeo!"

    "It's something you haven't seen before?"

    "Well, not from Maribel!" he replied, "I was expecting her Absol, not that!"

    "If that's the case, then that might be why she's using it." I've seen this sort of tactics before, and actually, "It's like when I used Huntail against Aporon. Um, except she probably was raising it on the side just to pull it out as a surprise here. And I was kinda, well."

    "I see what you mean. She thought Augustus was th-thinking she would use Absol, but so she...umm..."

    "She used something different."

    "Yes! Awesome! Let's see what the little sealion can do!"

    It may be a sealion, but the first of Augustus Gabriel's Pokémon is a true, vicious feline. It could probably go toe-to-toe with the king of the jungle and hold its own. The creature's fur - which is largely standing on end - is mostly black with a little bit of blue. You can only make out so much from far away, but I can see its long tail is adorned with a golden, cross-shaped object.

    And I don't know how to describe that massive bell-like object. Ancient markings line it, but where they come from is another question. On one hand, its upper part are these two curved pieces come together, sort of looking like the outline of a nun's habit, or perhaps a chapel, or I dunno. It just looks Holy, heavenly, or something. Then again, you probably wouldn't associate glowing red eyes with anything except something from Hell. Gravity doesn't seem to be a problem for it, wherever it originated.

    "His Luxray is dangerous," Thatcher remarked, "Bronzong isn't a slouch either! But I know Maribel can do this!"

    The signal to start came from the ref. Capdevila's Pokémon jumped into action right away on her command. Wormadam hopped up on top of Sealeo's nose and span about, spewing Bullet Seeds as its ally balanced it on top. Not wanting to be left out, Gabriel made his Luxray run beneath its own partner and fire electricity, which conducted out in the upper piece of Bronzong while illuminating itself in the glow.

    Sealeo tossed up Wormadam and went into an awkward but functional Defense Curl. The plant landed upside-down while firing String Shot. After a moment, it grew to a larger size and flipped over so it was the one doing the balancing. Luxray permeated a brilliant Flash from its whole body, followed up by Bronzong tilting and using Flash Cannon at a course that had to have been intentionally off for the sake of being more luminous.

    "Looks like they're just testing the waters now."

    "Yeah," Thatcher agreed, "They're be-being careful."

    A standoff. Even I'm on the edge of my seat in anticipation. The Pokémon took initiative. Luxray took up a threatening stance, attempting to stare its foes down. Sealeo couldn't see it, and Wormadam wasn't impressed. The latter fired a couple Bullet Seeds at Bronzong in reply, but they just glanced off. The Pokémon remained still after this.

    The coordinators' orders were in-sync with one another. Luxray loosed a powerful Thunderbolt from its fur, just as Wormadam shot Sealeo out at a high speed. The bagworm shrugged off the electrical attack, but Bronzong was knocked to the ground by the fast-moving seal. It proceeded to uncurl and turn to face Luxray just as Luxray turned to face it. But that gave Wormadam a chance to charge and shoot it with an Energy Ball.

    "Woohoo! Go, Maribel!!"

    When Luxray turned again, it got hit with a Water Gun that sent it between its two foes. Capdevila took up a deterministic stance as she gave a command, and her Pokémon used Seed Bomb and Water Pulse respectively.

    Whatever she was up to with that, Bronzong intervened. A simple Psywave repulsed the attacks without issue. Luxray recovered and ran behind the bell. After a bit of focusing, it fired Shock Wave after Shock Wave The two Pokémon were forced to flee to the line before Bronzong - the only accessible space safe from the barrage. With a point from its trainer, the ancient construct began to repeatedly use Gyro Ball. Wormadam and Sealeo were having extreme difficulty consistently dodging this assault in the limited space available.

    "This is bad!" Thatcher panicked. "What'll she do? Fritz, what do you think Maribel should do?!"

    "I don't know her Pokémon's attacks..." I pointed out. Thatcher frowned and began to chew on his nails. I've actually seen something like this a few times before. One or two Pokémon stopping the foes' lateral movement, and one on-point to attack straight forward. It looks overwhelming, but actually isn't too horrible to deal with.

    Capdevila seemed to think of something, though. Sealeo sat up and began to clap. Bronzong perked up at this applause...falling for that Encore.

    Thatcher was left scratching his head. "Why'd she do that?"

    "It looks like she's locking Gabriel's Bronzong into that move, so it can't react to whatever she has planned next."

    I could barely hear his thoughts spoken aloud, "What could she be planning next?" Thatcher focused hard. And then snapped up. "Of course! Her Wormadam's Secret Power!"

    The ground around Luxray began to tremble. Before it could respond, the ground burst out from beneath it. The black and blue Pokémon was launched about a meter into the air. With the Shock Waves out of the picture, Capdevila's Pokémon split off from each other, circling around their two foes from different directions.

    Gabriel's cursing could be heard from up here, "Sabotage me, will you?! Luxray, backup plan!"

    Luxray picked itself up and began launching precision Thunderbolts at the Gyro Balls - being aimed for Wormadam. The electrified rotor blades looked impressive, but were quite easy for the plant to evade. Meanwhile, a quicker Sealeo had already bounded into position. It strained hard...but the effort paid off when the pieces of shattered earth came together as a Rock Tomb! Wormadam started to coat it in String Shot, but Augustus Gabriel was having none of that.

    His Luxray charged forward, trembling violently. It crashed into the stone that was being set up, shattering it into hundreds, if not thousands of tiny fragments. Doing this took a lot out of it; the feline-like Pokémon nearly collapsed trying to recover from the powerful move.


    "B-but...but why would he Giga Impact the rock?!"

    "I don't know," I told him, "But now's Maribel's chance!"

    And indeed, she was already giving orders to Wormadam and Sealeo to put something together...but Bronzong never let them capitalize on the opportunity. A deafening tone, half clanging and half scraping, rang out. The two Pokémon were halted by the Metal Sound.

    A recovering Luxray bared its...Sealeo emitted a...Wormadam The battle is breaking down. It's not on the Pokémon's ends, either - at least, I'm guessing it's not from how the two opponents stand. The pure hatred each has for the other is just...

    "This is not what I expected from a top level contest."

    "It's....wh-what...why are"

    The crowd already baffled as the Pokémon were brawling, the end came so suddenly that it took like fifteen seconds to register. Luxray's tail became as hard as steel, smashing Sealeo across the arena with a thunderous CRACK that made me wonder if it was electrified as well. Bronzong was ready as the mustached blue Pokémon rolled over to it. A vicious Solarbeam shot out of its inside, wasting the sealion. Wormadam's response was swift and as brutal. Luxray got assaulted by a vicious Leaf Storm, opening up numerous cuts on its body, only being spared when Bronzong made the save. It enveloped Wormadam; the only clue to the Flash Cannons it was doing being the strobing light they gave off. When bell came up, the plant Pokémon was down.


    Whalz stood and made the announcement, "Winner of this matchup by defeat, Augustus Gabriel."

    Thatcher's eyes went wide. The kind of expression that says one can't believe this is happening. "! No!"

    Hey, what the?

    "Thatcher, where are you going?!" He launched himself from his seat and took off. And I was hyped to see whoever won between Wylde and The Poffin Man beat this guy into the ground. After a pause of shock, I scrambled my feet in pursuit.


    My efforts to follow my friend were in vain. I lost sight of him right as I left the Contest Hall.

    In fact, only way later was I able to meet back up with him. After several hours of attempting to find him on my own, I thought to take a different approach. To go somewhere helpful, rather than aimlessly wandering. But even with the aid of the Traveling Hobos, the sun had all but completely set by the time I saw results. At this point, I'm just thankful they found something.

    "Are you sure it's him?" I asked en route, somewhat pointlessly. I don't know what I was thinking with that question. Maybe I underestimate the effect this had on me.

    "Indeed it is," Mr. Gruff said. "He is among the distraught individuals I have seen, and that is counting the highest sorrows from Boozer! I believe it would be best if you spoke to him yourself."

    I don't know what part of town this is. It's not one I recognize. The darkened state of the city isn't helping affairs - I've mentioned its energy conservation to reduce skyglow before, and though being in-town after nightfall isn't something I'm foreign to, I've never been in the heart of downtown at that time before. It's surreal, really. Eventually, we hung a left into an alleyway, where I spotted my friend.

    Thatcher sits on an old zaffer couch. It's seen worse days, in spite of numerous tears along the sides. I can tell that must have been patched up at some point. Similar places to sit or lie down are in this alley as well, including a couple of mattresses and a rocking chair - the only damage to the latter appearing to have come from weather. Oddly enough, they all look just a little better maintained than the pavement.

    The only source of lighting here are the lights on the two buildings with back exits, as well as one with inactive vents. At full-on night, they'd likely be barely adequate. In the former two instances, a wheeled dumpster is near the door. The assorted litter in the alley probably came from there given the proximity, cast out by the wind and not by a human.

    "Thanks, Mr. Gruff. You too, Biggie."

    I had to tilt my head way back to acknowledge the latter individual, who has to be at least seven feet tall. A couple other individuals in the alley joined them, likely watching over Thatcher before we arrived. Biggie's nod was the only response any of the men gave, before leaving us.

    "Where did you go? What happened?" I asked once they left. I hoped that two questions at once would not be overwhelming as I walked over.

    Thatcher turned away in shame. A bowl of soup sits in his lap; he took a small sip from it before speaking. "I...didn't...I couldn't...didn't want to stay to see the rest. I-I wanted to go back the school. But...I-I got...I didn't know how...where to go." He forced himself, turning his head with his hands, to face me. "Fritz...I'm s-sorry."

    "You all right?" I asked as I sat down. That's the only thing on my mind at the moment. His reaction back there or having to search for him didn't really bother me.

    "N-not...I don't...I just don't know. It's just that..." Thatcher's voice trailed off. He took an incredibly deep breath, "I mean, I know it's just a c-contest, but..." With that, he let out the excess all at once. My eyes spotted a splash of liquid in his soup. I peered up and held out my hand. Is it raining? No, there's no drops of rain falling onto me. Thatcher crying? What could be bothering him? It can't be just that, can it?

    There was no need to chance asking, as he began to elaborate on his own. "I...I've been watching Maribel from the day she started out..." he lamented, trembling in sorrow. "She...her dream...I really like how she was able to follow it. But...if you look at someone...I mean, I don't mean any offense, but..."

    When he went silent, I queried, "But?"

    He sighed. "Augustus Gabriel was born...well, his dad...grandma and great-grandpa...they were all coordinators. But Maribel...her parents weren't. She wanted to be one, and she did. I...I really like that. She followed her own dream. And she's...i-it's just..."


    "Maribel...I've never seen her get...seen her win something big. It''s not that she lost. It's just..." Thatcher abruptly placed his bowl down with a sigh. He stood, legs managing to not falter beneath him. He admitted quietly, "I was sure she was going to win this time."

    My friend walked forth in anguish. I only watched as he moved over to one of the mattresses in the alley and lied back. The words he said...the ones that put his reaction in perspective. They were spoken as a faint, quivering whisper.

    "If Maribel can't do it, what chance do I have?"

    And so the pieces fall into place. Sort of. Well, there's something I can say about that, so I may as well say it.

    "Thatcher, there's lots of people out there who have trouble with that. It's just something that can't really be explained." I paused. Thinking. Maybe. "You can still go for it. And's just one contest. It's not over for her yet, is it?"

    "You''re right. You're right!" He perked right up, grinning from ear to ear. "There's always the Grand Festival! Maribel's got to be able to win that!" He had a smile and deterministic look in his eye as his clenched a fist. "No, I know she's going to win!"

    His attitude having done a complete 180, Thatcher turned to me with a more relaxed demeanor. "Thanks, Fritz," he said, "I really needed that."

    He cheered up...a little too quickly there. I don't want to jump to any conclusons just yet, but he might not want to dwell on this at all. I mean, it could have been a simple overreaction. But my words may very well just be a temporary fix for an ongoing problem. I guess we'll see what happens. But for now...

    "Let's head back. I imagine Reika must be worried sick."

    A nod. "We should. And hopefully the school will be...will..."

    "The gates should still be open. It's dark, but it's not too late." Actually just making an educated guess there. I really don't know the schedule, or whether the fire incident would have affected it. "But if not, we've slept in the outdoors and in-town before." I looked outward. "Come on, let's get the hobos to lead us back."

    Well...the day started off nice at least. That has to count for something, right? doesn't really. By the look on Thatcher's face, even he's starting to have the stress get to him. All we can do is cross our fingers, and pray for a better tomorrow. I know I said something like that yesterday...but the upswing has to be looming. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when. How long is it going to be, though?
    Don't know what to put here.

  12. #42
    Christmas Bubble Frog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Blog Entries

    Follow Bubble Frog on Tumblr

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Two of the "old" chapter reviews: :P

    1-6 - 1-7

    Sorry that I can do my usual nitpicking, since this is a hefty amount of chapters and I don't want these reviews to be too long for ya. :P


    So, Reika had a very adventurous idea this chapter. Looking back, I'm actually somewhat surprised to see that out of her given she usually has a somewhat unnerved and bothered demeanor about everything in the recent chapters. Of course that could be due to her leg being broken and who wouldn't get antsy and pissed over a broken bone? It just feels like a subtle, yet sharp contrast to her future actions to want to get into such a shenanigan. I almost forgot this chapter debuted Reika and Thatcher's Wigglytuff and Sandshrew and that reminds me that Thatcher and Reika have a bit of history with each other. Fritz has a bit of a brain fart and sends out his non-confidence-having Eevee.(I wonder when this is gonna be addressed further.)

    For the most part the battle scene was well done and kept me entertained. I gotta say that Reika certainly did come off as a tad too critical of Fritz, she's at fault as well for her actions when it came to use Wigglytuff's Sing and going all gung-ho on Fritz for his using Mareep was definitely harsh. I think it's a good think I felt strongly about that scene because it managed to elicit emotion from me, it's proof that I've grown to care about your characters which is a job well done by any fanfic writer. The arguing scene was my favorite because it added some spark. The jabs Reika made at him kept me engrossed in the spat from start to finish. You excel at character interactions and also the scene with Reika calling for Thatcher to help instead of him was a nice way of highlighting how she and Thatcher might be better friends in a way. Maybe Fritz feels like a 3rd wheel?

    "It's dark." Thatcher whispered.
    Just something technical here, when you have a dialogue tag(said, whispered, screamed) you use a comma at the end of a line of dialogue.


    The "beast" turning out to be a Stantler was surprising, again this has to do with your description being so enigmatic at times it's hard to figure out what Pokemon you're referring too. This is good in a sense because it gets the reader wondering just what the beast is, I was taken off-guard by Stantler. Stantler can distort reality and create illusions but you expanding on that and adding Psychic traits to it was unexpected. Didn't expect Nidoran to get taken out, it seems to be Fritz's strongest Pokemon at this point. I also was surprised to see the creature resisted Tangela's powder moves, I can't help but think this is going back to the main plot of the fic. somehow. It's an off-limits areas after all. Still couldn't believe Fritz had gotten out and hadn't seen Reika or Thatcher after the fact. Irene and Aporon making appearances this chapter was unexpected though they added some nice fire to the scenes they were in.(Again, this goes back to your character interactions crafting skills.) None of your characters come off as empty, they all seem to have some personality to them makes me care about them. Whether it be a like-like, like-dislike, or dislike-dislike type deal. The training was entertaining as well, especially with Nidoran showing some animosity toward it.

  13. #43
    It wasn't much! Flaze's Avatar Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Why do you care
    Blog Entries
    Add Flaze on Facebook
    Follow Flaze on Tumblr Visit Flaze's Youtube Channel

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Well this was a really really really nice chapter that I liked :3 for one I really liked the battle between Maribel and...that other guy, sorry for not remembering xD The battle in this chapter was really well described and the action flowed very well. I liked how you introduced all these big coordinators from different countries as well to give us a bigger view about the world of your fic.

    Though what I think is the biggest highlight is the fact that this chapter expands more on Thatcher's personality than it did before. Another thing, is that I hadn't noticed Thatcher's stutter much in previous chapters xD I just caught up on that. But it was nice to see a different side of him this time around and to learn a bit more about his aspirations and his fears, Thatcher doesn't get much attention sadly. I wanted to see more Phoebe so shame on you :p

    On that note, I can't wait for this tournament to finally start!

  14. #44
    THE CULT OF PERSONALITY System Error's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Blog Entries

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World



    Chapter 2-6: Heart of Nature

    It's just another day where I have to deal with Aporon and company's special brand of training.

    What are we doing today? Only my favorite thing to do! Being led through the forest without knowing where I'm headed to! It's the third time! No, wait...fourth time. For the assembly, when going to Abet's Bluff, and chasing the arsonist through the woods.

    Okay. Let's back up a bit here. I was ambushed as soon as I walked out of the dorms this morning. I didn't even get a chance for breakfast before I was whisked off by the jackasses. Expect the unexpected. That's what they said. Also, about your running off the other day, it is not going to happen again. Yet considering Thatcher and I couldn't even find sanctuary in something supposed to be pleasant engrossment, this is just par for the course. Still, to hell with these jackasses.

    "So," I asked in an attempted calm fashion, "What's your ingenious plan for today?"

    Aporon, leading the way, didn't even turn slightly to say, "You'll find out."

    "Yeah." Edgar, on the other hand, couldn't pass up the chance to turn and give a glare that burned with the intensity of a Class O star. "So keep your asses moving."

    Phoebe whimpered. Her motions are torpid, perhaps more under the strain of what is physically holding us down. Oh, I should ask about those too. "And another thing. What's with the heavy bags?"

    "I told you," Aporon firmly repeated, "You'll find out."

    Argh. Well, being in the woods during a cloudy day gives a different vibe from being in it when the sun is flying freely in the sky or at night. Though possible to see well, with rays not shining in through the canopy, the grove feels serene. A light rainshower could make it even better, but those types of clouds aren't in the sky.

    My partner and I had been matching the other's stride throughout the trip, though we hadn't talked to one another yet. Phoebe was keeping her eyes on her feet, perhaps for fear of a misstep. "What do you think they're going to do to us?" she suddenly whispered about a minute after Aporon had evaded my question. A dreadful shudder followed.

    "With them, who knows?" I really didn't want to think about that. The extended possibilities of a secluded spot compared to being out in public are bad enough, but in the thick of the wilderness, there's just endless potential.

    Five minutes of further walking took us to a clearing. The roughly round assart wasn't all that, being about eight to ten meters in diameter. At the very least, it could be a sigh of relief for those who are claustrophobic.

    Aporon and his goons stopped roughly in the middle. "All right. We're here."

    "Finally." I cast the bag onto the dirt before me, prompting the prep to come running over as it clattered.

    "Hey! Be careful with that!" He scolded me as he retrieved the leather sack. He untied the rope sealing the sack up, opened it, and pulled out one of the contents. It's a piece of...a table? The prep carefully examined the equipment, checking if my mistreatment had caused any damage.

    "You're real lucky you didn't break that, shithead..." Edgar threatened as he took Phoebe's bag. She was speechless at the development, finding no relief in the weight taken off her back. The girl robotically straightened her posture. My response was even less positive.

    "What the hell is this?" I demanded.

    "This," the prep explained without a shred of irony, "Is what you would call a picnic."

    Phoebe put up her hands halfway. Even as the empty bags were thrust onto her, ending up suspended as a towel, she remained in position. "But...but..." She was trying her hardest to protest, yet couldn't bring herself to do so.

    "All right. You got us good." I could, though, in a way. So we're pack mules now? May as well try to suck the enjoyment out of this for them out of spite. I inquired, "You want us to get this ready for you?"

    "Not yet we ain't ready."

    I didn't verbally reply. I stared back at the four with apathy, waiting for them to speak. They may have been expecting me to do so first, as this standoff went on for a good twenty seconds. Phoebe took a step back over its course, standing behind me. I tapped my foot a couple times.

    "Hee. Hehe." Lawrence had angled his appendages, dangerously close to being doubled over in a futile attempt to contain his disgusting laughter. He pointed at me with two fingers, "Westmyn! Climb that tree there!" obscenely gesturing to the one in question with his other hand.

    Climb the tree. With the low, but not low enough branches. I crossed my arms and continued to stare at them, but with a more distant look than prior. It's hard for even I to ascertain whether this is a dramatic facade or true inhibitions. I have awareness that this is removed from the norm for myself. An approach I wouldn't ordinarily take. It is tiredness, but is it from lack of sleep, or being fed up of their nonsense?

    "Do it! Hehe! Climb the tree!"

    My retinas went to each of them, one after another. Aporon was standing coolly in his typical attire, arms slack at his sides. His usual stance for such scenarios. The prep, dressed casually by his standards, had a hand on his hip, and an expression near to my own. Lawrence was fully animate, each major joint tilted at a unique angle. There's no symmetry to this guy's posture. At all. Not even incidentally, however brief, as he writhed. It was little surprise that Edgar was in a white shirt and jeans, the former of which had been stained with sweat since we entered.

    "Climb the fucking tree," the fratboy demanded with a threatening tone and pose, "Or we'll stick you up there ourselves."

    I said nothing. I did not move. I didn't even flinch. I just continued to stare at him with soulless eyes as he made an empty threat.

    "And how do you plan on doing that?"

    Lawrence reached into his pants. He whipped out a Poké Ball and cackled insanely as he unleashed the beast over the ground. A strange one to be certain, about halfway between amphibian and reptile. Standing on trunk-like legs with webbed toes, its wide turquoise body is half-covered in malformed warts. A massive burgundy rafflesia sits on its back, with a coronet in the center. It's tilted forward a little. Beneath these five petals are five ferns, one of which droops over its forehead in front of its autumn-tinted irises. It roared as it emerged, continuing to bar its fangs even as its mouth was closed.

    I turned my glare on the fat sauropod. I don't know how well this is trained, but it must have a commendable level of experience given the trainer. That takes Eevee and Mareep out of the picture. Huntail is a Water type, so I really don't want to mess around with that. Tangela is the strongest Pokémon I have on-hand. The only problem is, this is a large, obese Pokémon with a low center of gravity I'm dealing with here. That limits the usefulness of using its vines directly. Despite a battlefield designed for indirect use, other damaging options are also quite limited. That would leave Nidorina to crack its face open, which she's more than capable of doing. But it's a coinflip. I wish I had some of my reserves.

    "I'm going to kill them when this is over..." I quietly grumbled to no one in particular. Phoebe heard my statement, appearing to be a little shaken by it. I stomped up to my destination, one of the larger trees here. This is a big first step. I grasped the highest branch I could reach, using a combination of jumping, pulling, and sort of walking up the side as a mountain climber might to reach a slightly lower branch to the right of it.

    With my footing secure, the rest of the climb wasn't too bad. I repeated my technique, holding onto a limb above with my hands as I placed my feet on one beneath. About fifteen to twenty feet's enough, I figure. Moreso considering it looks like this is about as high as I can safely get. "All right. Now what?"

    Their attention turned to Phoebe. "Your turn now, bitch," Edgar ordered. "Climb the tree."

    "What?" Phoebe gasped. Her fear was palpable, but one intense stare from that smelly fratboy was enough to convince her to start moving. She nervously sauntered up to the base. She looked up for a moment, briefly meeting my eyes. What I first thought was a light breeze was a gentle whisper. After more hesitation, Phoebe attempted to follow my lead, reaching for the same branch I did. For me, it was comfortably within my range, but she was just a few inches too short. She compensated by springing off the ground, wrapping her arms tightly around the limb as her legs momentarily flailed. When my partner calmed down, she tried to walk up the side like I did. Getting should be easy for her once she gets by-

    "Hehe. Enough. Venu!"

    "Wait!" she protested, but they weren't listening. With a dirty gesture to his Pokémon, two vines came out from beneath the massive flower consuming its backside. Phoebe yelped as the appendages wrapped around her. She at first desperately tried to break free, then she looked down. Waiver. When she was deposited beside me, her first action was to cling to the trunk for dear life.

    "HEHEHEHEHAHAHA! Look! Fritz and Phoebe sittin' in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

    "Cut it out." Aporon ordered, putting a stop to the lecherous nerd's antics. And maybe sparing him from being ousted in a snarky response ('Kissing a girl is nice, you should try it sometime!'). "All right. We got everything we need to have lunch here, except berries. So you'll be gathering them today."

    Phoebe was crying in unbridled terror. "But what if we fall?!"

    She didn't get an answer to that.

    Somehow I didn't notice the berries dangling above us initially. But there they are. Preemptively, Phoebe took one of the bags stuffed into her pocket and held it out. So that's why they gave her them to hang onto. And, her acrophobia may be rubbing off on me a little. I kept at least three of my limbs grafted to the trees' own as I made my way over to retrieve a container.

    Let's examine the circumstances. Berries...are some freaky shit, to quote a friend of mine back home. They're like fruit, and sometimes they are called fruit, except they're not actually fruit. Some are even closer to vegetables. Whatever the case might be, they have a definitive link to Pokémon, and a certain mineral or amino acid in common in their DNA. The fickle conditions for healthy growth made Fructology (occasionally Creaturafructology) a study all its own. And I'm not one of those, so my speculation that these are ones that only grow at a certain height of a tree is simply an educated guess.

    "Why here?" I inquired, out of the blue. "And did you have to make this difficult?"

    "The four of us sometimes come here if we need privacy. And do you know why it's difficult?" Aporon was in preaching mode, with a touch of distaste. "Besides you being difficult and being better coordinated, it'd be much easier if you followed the four Ps."

    "Why the hell do you keep saying that? The four Ps."

    He counted them off. "Prudence. Planning. Passion. And perspiration. That's what it takes to succeed."

    I thought to save my breath this time, not even sighing as I wanted to. As I finished up on one branch and went in to move to another, I passed by Phoebe, who hadn't budged.

    "What if we fall..." she repeated, this time as though it were an inevitability.

    "Phoebe, it's okay. Just hang in there." Wait, that was horrible. "Oh, sorry." She chuckled softly, breathing easily for a pithy moment. "Just do what you can. I'll handle it."


    I lost track of the time, but achieved the result I was looking for - my bag was a little over three-quarters full. Phoebe had gathered only what was around her. "There, that's everything that was up here." Lawrence snapped his fingers, prompting his Venu to retrieve the bags from us. I checked to my left. "You want us to go to the next one?"

    "Hehe!" What? "Not exactly." He snapped his fingers and wrist forward, prompting his Pokémon to make a charge forward. What the hell?

    "What are you doing!?" Phoebe cried, hugging the tree tighter as the Take Down struck. Holy shit, that hit hard. Lawrence cackled sadistically as his Pokémon drove its gargantuan body forward again and again. The others only looked on, neither in support or opposition of their ally. Each collision wobbled the tree violently. Phoebe's body's having an internal earthquake of an even higher magnitude. The branches are trembling most of all, not good for me. Trying to make my way over to the middle...and wow, Phoebe got out of there fast.

    A great idea. I'd better start moving too. If that fat thing keeps slamming into the trunk, it's going to fall over. Or...GAH!! Or I could fall, too!


    Son of a...ow. That's it.

    "Oh, very funny, assholes. You know, you could've said 'oh hey, Fritz and Phoebe! We want you to gather berries in this tree because maybe it'll help you when you're out in the wild! Pokémon always have to eat berries! And they make a great snack for yourself! Then when you're done, we'll rattle the tree because, hey, you never know! The knowledge might come in handy someday! The four of us get free berries, and you two get to battle a swarm of Beedrill while we eat! If you get it done before we finish, maybe you'll get to eat too!' Well, fuck you!"

    ", where'd you go?"

    "This is bad. Run!"


    Wait, there's a swarm of Beedrill here.

    "Fuck it. You're going down!"

    I'm pissed off. I don't even care about the mild pain from that landing now. It's just a bunch of bugs. Yellow bugs with only four legs two of which are spiked, with dark red eyes that look like they come from a horror movie, but bugs all the same! Let's see, Eevee is out, because duh. Mareep may or may not be able to go in and nuke them all on its own, but it might not be such a good idea. Huntail should be effective - soaking their wings should make it difficult to fly. That should allow Nidorina to pounce on them and go to town. And I know in a similar situation before I said it wasn't a good idea, but with those two working together, Tangela should be fit to play a defensive role. We got this!

    I sent out the three Pokémon and quickly explained the plan to them. Huntail didn't even wait for me to finish. The bees were taken aback by its impulsive blast of water. The fight's on!!

    Let's do this! Anything in the air that's approaching near Huntail is meeting with the same consequence - getting completely drenched. Each one that got shot plummeted to the ground, ended up blasted several feet back, or both. In the rare instances where one manages to get through and start swatting, typically when multiple go for it at once from opposite directions, Huntail is swinging its head at the attacker. Whether they back off or get smacked, the eel drives them away from itself.

    That's only so uncommon due to what Tangela is doing. It's swinging, cracking, and twirling about the four vines retracted from its body. It's guarding Huntail with two, me with one, and the extra it's using for the mobile Nidorina and itself. The bees don't seem coordinated enough to get the DNA mishmash, though. Remember how back at Abet's Bluff, Thatcher's Sandshrew jumped on any Zubat that fell to the ground and tore into them with Fury Swipes? That's more or less what Nidorina is doing right down to the same attack, only her slashing is far more vigorous. Though unlike Sandshrew, her typical response to an opponent too close for comfort is not to curl up, but to lash out at them.

    And...I just got knocked to the ground by something slamming into me! Whatever Beedrill did this is going to pay.


    This...isn't a Beedrill. It's bigger and fatter. Instead of a stinger, it's got a rigid, lumpy pod of some sort. Instead of needles for hands, it's got two nasty-looking crooks. Instead of blood-red eyes...okay, still got those, but now it's wearing a headpiece with a ruby in the center that makes me think it broke free after ten thousand years of imprisonment. Also...shit, here it comes!

    I kicked out my foot as the queen bee charged, catching it in the side and getting to my feet as it was stunned. Hm, in the jackass' haste, they've forgotten the equipment. The Pokémon are occupied...but there's still this butcher knife here!

    "You want a piece of me, bitch?!!"

    The blade glistened, reflecting the clouds above. It, and my gutsy threat, I guess wasn't necessary, because the sort of regal Pokémon (that goes by Vespiquen, if I remember correctly), just got taken to the ground by one of my Pokémon. I guess they're not preoccupied.

    No, hold on, they are. Tangela is defending Huntail, Nidorina is dueling with a group of three.

    Wait, Eevee?

    I checked my pockets. Only four balls. Eevee's clattered out when I was hit just now. Logic is the only way I'm sure of that, and even now I doubt it's my own. What I saw in weeks past was an adorable, nervous Pokémon, eyes shining with innocence. All I see now in its eyes is DEATH.

    As the Vespiquen got up, Eevee jumped for it again, jaw open. The fox clamped around the bee's thorax. The response to this deathly threat was immediate - it tried to thrash in order to get rid of its attacker. But it didn't work! The bee had to literally pry Eevee from its throat before it could tear it out, tossing it to the ground. That didn't slow the fox down. It was right back on the bee, going for the lower body and chomping into the side. Unlike last time, the Vespiquen's shaking was effective. Eevee once again recovered hastily, and violently tackled it to the ground. It's completely dismantling this thing, good lord. The Vespiquen resigned itself to its fate, not resisting as the fox stomped on both its arms. Finally, Eevee finished with a mighty spinning leap, coming down hard on its head. A bit of the guts inside leaked out from the impact.

    Holy shit.

    I didn't think it could get any creepier, but it just did. After mauling a Pokémon half to death, if not outright killing it, Eevee went right back to normal. It smiled brightly with a wagging tail, blissfully ignorant to the dark green blood oozing from its mouth.

    The fallen adversary twitched.

    Don't know whether it's fear of it or Eevee going ballistic again, but I searched my pockets for a spare ball and hurled it. The Vespiquen vanished into the confines of the sphere. And the red light instantly went out. That's not good...

    I located and retrieved Eevee's ball, gave my Pokémon a pat on the head, and recalled it, just to be extra sure.

    Well, the others have been doing great so far. Some have retreated, others are unconscious on the ground.

    Then, the Beedrill all fell to the ground at the same time, and...wait, what? It's like an invisible force is being exerted upon them. Huntail and Tangela halted their attack in confusion. Nidorina was caught up in the moment and continued to assault a few hapless foes, When she finally took notice, she remained vigilante. True to her instinct, the Beedrill clamored up. She snarled viciously. The swarm seemed to be thinking of how to handle it, but eventually decided that discretion is the better part of valor.

    That was...what the hell was that?

    Well, whatever. I have a sixth Pokémon, I guess? Okay, technically eleventh. And if you want to count those back, well. I guess I should focus on the fact that it's not in good shape. Hm.


    This is my first time stepping into this section of campus, and hopefully the last. It's brightly lit, made even more dazzling by the large amount of shiny and/or white objects in the room. From what I have surmised, it's the only multi-tiered room in the main building, stationed in the west wing of the first and second floors. As such, there's a wide elevator and a set of floating stairs - the latter of which, ironically, don't look as safe as they should for a place like this. It may just be my imagination. But they just look so strange without the risers.

    "Is this the infirmary?" I called out to anyone with ears. "I need someone to check on my Pokémon."

    "Fritz? Fritz, what are you doing here?!"

    The speaker came over to me, slumped yet surprised. I felt the latter emotion, myself. "You're not in detention, Reika?"

    "I went early!" she snapped. My friend thought a little, before continuing on more calmly, "I just got out. And I need to get my leg checked back up on!"

    Wait. "They let you choose when you go?" That's...the weirdest thing. Or is it in the morning on the weekends? I never bothered to ask them about that, but it might be. Or maybe more time passed than I thought in the woods.

    "What's the problem?"

    A stout man had answered my call. His name tag gave me his name as Doctor Enso S. Thole. He's a little more grizzled than I was expecting for a doctor, let alone the head doctor of a university.

    "Well," I nervously said. I'd thought carefully about what I was going to say on my way here, but Reika's appearance threw me off. I continued as best I could, "I ran into a Vespiquen in the woods, and I had to battle it, and my Pokémon got a little carried away." Phew. Wait. "And can you take a look at it for me?" I hastily added.

    The doctor nodded and accepted its ball. "Consider her taken care of."

    "Fritz." Just when I thought I could breathe a sigh of relief, Reika stepped in front of me. It was clear she wanted to look more stern, but her crutch and pain was preventing her from doing so. "What did you let your Pokémon do?"

    "Relax. He'll take care of it. It's nothing to be worried about."

    "Fritz, that's not a good way of thinking."

    I could only sigh in response. She's right. That did seem a little detached. I could admittedly and/or arguably stand to be a little closer to Pokémon, but it doesn't mean anything. It's not wrong to be where I am. And I'm nowhere near the level that some people are at. Let's look on the bright side. With Aporon and company having flown the coop, and the homework looked after, I now have some time. Which means.

    "Reika, do you want to help me out?"

    "What?" She completely accepted my changing of the subject. Was worried that she wouldn't. This just made my job a whole lot easier.

    "Remember last week when I found out about when the school would reopen?"

    "Yes," she said. "But what does that have to do with anything?"

    I recalled the strange green-haired girl from before. "Well, the person who told me asked me to go to the small building next to the offices when I had the time." Her request had come out of nowhere, and even after a week, I'm still not sure how to approach it. I had thought of at least one thing, and that's what I put forth, "I'd feel a little more comfortable if someone was with me."

    "That place?" So she knows what I'm talking about. Reika sighed, as if she didn't have anything better to do. "Fine."

    For the first time in a while, my mood is more positive than negative. With thanks and a thumbs up of approval, Reika and I set off for our destination.


    The sky had cleared up a bit since this morning. The sun was still obstructed by clouds, but patches of blue now lay on the horizon. Yet the serenity remained, and I was able to enjoy it now. Though, we were making such decent time, that I let out a "heh."

    "What's so funny?" Reika asked, correctly inferring I was thinking of her, but believing it was something that was unfavorable.

    "You're moving almost as fast as you did before you broke your leg."

    "Well, duh. I'm used to it." I'm unsure whether to call that modesty or indifference. Her next statement was a clear complaint: "Stairs are still a goddamn PAIN, though. I won't get used to that."

    Hm. I hadn't actually been with her too many times on the stairwells since her injury. I should've figured she'd have problems though. Actually, I feel a little bad for not realizing it sooner. The fact that only one of her classes is on the main floor no doubt caused her grief. Even considering the possibility of using the elevator in the Medical class, she would still need to go to Art the hard way. I wish there was something I could do to help her.

    Before long, we were in front of the meeting place. I hope this is a good day. I raised my hand and loudly knocked on the door with a closed fist. It's sturdier than it looks...actually hurt myself a bit. Noticed it more than falling from a tree...but then again, adrenaline was making me ignore that.

    "So," Reika impatiently asked as we waited. "Do you know who this person is, and why they wanted you to meet them at a random shack?"

    "Nope to both."

    Reika rolled her eyes. "God. This looks like someone decided to build their house here." That's actually a fairly accurate description. It's like this modest cottage with an Eastern European flair to it. It's wooden, but has been painted shades of brown - sepia for the walls, khaki for the roof, a bright burnt umber for the door and window frames.

    A chunky fellow with braided chestnut hair answered. He had a green and white vest on over a white shirt and navy jeans. "Oh hey, it's you!" he cheerfully greeted. "Come on in!" He held the door for us, beckoning us to step inside Nerves suddenly plagued me, but only for half a second. Here we go...



    This is nothing like I've witnessed at Rukh's. It's minimalistic, yet has a distinct aesthetic theme rooted in the traditionalist and natural. Potted plants stand tall in each of the four corners. A modest number of abstractions and panoramas further make it feel as a jungle. Not a single piece of upholstered furniture graces this setting, and only a few wicker chairs. Cushions provide aid for the sitting, those with and without both on the moss-esque rug. Two hallways straight ahead divide the far wall into thirds, with another passage in the center of the right one. All lead to a ninety-degree crossroads.

    Around a dozen people are present. Hailing from different walks of life, united under one roof. The diversity is illimitable. A few adorn rags that make Reika and I look high-class. Others impute us as the ones in shabby clothing! Both genders are represented about equally, as are varying degrees of health, fortitude, and self-regard. And yet, outward show and background is where the differences meet their end. Somehow...

    The individual who had requested my presence stood hindmost. Initially turned, she faced us upon the door's shutting reaching her ears. A soft smile washed over her on catching sight of me. Hands folded, she took two steps forward. "Frisco," she offered salutations, "I'm glad you came."

    Reika's befuddled response I caught out of the corner of my eye. She briefly went into postulation, glancing at me after. "Frisco?" she queried.

    "That's my given name," I construed. "I go by Fritz, because...well, long story. Never mind." That may be on my friend's mind, but what's on mine is how did this girl become aware of that?

    "Was beginning to wonder if you'd forgotten!" remarked the young man who had let us in with a laugh.

    Reika rolled her eyes. She glared at the guy. An explanation exists for my delayed arrival, and she had no qualms about stating it in her own words. "Well, it HAS been really busy lately. If you didn't know."

    "Well, that is true," a girl interjected, looking to be a senior student, "Though it was only Fritz invited, so I don't think someone that came in unannounced should talk so rudely."

    "He asked me to come! And you didn't tell him anything! That's what's rude!"

    "Reika," I calmed, taking a half-step closer. I leaned in and murmured, "Let's hear them out first. Then, you can yell at them if you want."

    She clearly wanted to say more, but relented with a sigh and nod. I really don't blame her for her reaction. I've been on-edge lately too. Though it's weird. As soon as I stepped inside, I wasn't feeling it as much. I don't know if Reika is as well; I'm leaning towards nugatory results. A skewed faith lies in her countenance.

    "Sorry about that," I apologized, just to ascertain favorable terms. I know it's more prudent than I need to be, but making more enemies is the last thing on my mind right now. Reika had asked a couple of reasonable questions during her speech, but I thought to journey in a different direction. "I see you know who I am already, but I don't know anything about you."

    Preluded by a gesture of affirmation, the green-haired girl divulged, "My name is Premala Amani Yuhawlah."

    What a curious name. Premala went into deep thought, before speaking once more. "I asked you last week what you held in your heart when you were before the stables. To tell you the truth, I always had a feeling. Since the moment I saw you that night." The moment she saw me that night. I wonder. Could this girl be my second opinion? Could Premala be the same one who cleared my name? No...I'm sure she is. A strange coincidence. The mysterious girl continued, "There are many people in the world who act only for themselves, be their decisions active or passive. This is an issue more widespread than some would want to believe. Even at this very university, it is a problem."

    She closed her eyes, hands folded with a lowered head. "It is a choice they've made. We can only do what we can." Premala's voice trailed off, and she sighed resignedly. Her expression remained becalmed throughout, including as she rose to lock eyes with me. "Frisco. With all respect to my peers, you made a decision that many would be afraid to make. Thank you."

    Reika had been observing with patience as requested thus far, yet I suppose even with she has her limits. Her question, "What are you trying to get at?" was not as brusque, but remained a bit uncouth.

    She was subsequently scolded by the girl from earlier, in a far more strident tone of voice, "I told you before, not to be rude in front of Lady Premala!"

    The girl in the violet robe shook her head. "No. You have a point..." she conceded. "I apologize for being ambiguous."

    Again, Premala went into thought before explaining, "This is the Activism Club of the University. We, the students present, run and organize this group. For all the matters in the world that go acknowledged, only a few are addressed. Countless others receive disregard. All of us here have a cause, a wish to aid people, Pokémon, and their environment however we can."

    "This is an activist's club?" I thought aloud. Everything is now in perspective, yet delicate handling is a necessity for this scenario. "I don't mean to disappoint. But if you want me to join you, I've never been into that sort of thing. Sorry."

    "It is fine," Premala replied with a nod. "It is not what I was to ask, anyway."

    "It's not?"

    The robed girl took a few steps closer and bowed respectfully. "Frisco." A soft beam formed on her lips. "Your actions that night truly are commendable."

    She placed her hands in cupped prayer, lowering her face into them momentarily as she drew ever nearer. "A number of our professors harbor resentment against you for failing to stop the fire. I want you to know, we...and I, don't think of it that way."

    "Premala, what is it that you-"

    She moved in and pressed her lips against mine?!?!!! She grabbed hold of me. Premala is lightly holding me at the side, not in a full-on embrace. The points of contact we share, and her mind...are tranquil, not turbulent. Yet-

    "Frisco, can you hear me?"

    What the? Her voice is echoing through my head...but how?


    It only hit me that my reply was verbal when the sound of laughter surrounded me. I looked around. Everyone in the clubhouse, save for a stunned Reika and the smiling young woman before me, couldn't help but giggle at my unintentionally awkward words. I want to say something to correct it...but what? And that was sudden. Everything, I mean.

    "I hope to see you around."


    Reika and I left the Activist's Club in silence. It's rare for me to be flustered. Having it happen is making me uneasy, and perhaps it was the same, or perhaps it was something else making my friend uneasy. It's far from quiet around the grounds at this hour...yet to my ears, it is. Am I going deaf? No, that's just crazy.

    "Fritz," Reika finally spoke, turning to face me. We came to a full stop about halfway between the battlegrounds and the shack. "You know what, I'm just going to say it. I think she's just trying to use you."

    "I know."

    "THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE-" Reika screamed, until she realized what I had said. A bit of gibberish escaped, a full three seconds before she said the comprehendible, "Wait, what?"

    "It's like you said," I explained, thankful that she accompanied me. I might not have thought of this had Reika not been here, and at least even if I had, it's good to get another's take on matters. "She never exactly said why she wanted me to go there. Then she goes and does that out of nowhere, without really explaining much of anything else."

    Reika gave sound advice, "Then tell her you're not interested!"

    "It's not that straightforward!" It was my turn to snap in response to her. She looks surprised. "What would people think of me if I were to turn down someone like her?" What am I saying? Does it matter that much to me? It shouldn't. But I'm saying it. Reika observed confusedly. This is insane. "I'm just not sure. I don't know. I'll have to handle this carefully."

    This is just such a strange situation. I couldn't make eye contact with Reika, unsure of how to explain it. I mean, I can't even explain it to myself. "But, well..." Deep breath. "There is one thing I can tell you."

    "What?" Reika was showing a bit of the concern she usually reserves for someone else. It wasn't much, and hard to notice through her typical tone, but it was present.

    There is one thing I'm sure about here. There is one certainty among this. "You know when you kiss someone you really really like, and you feel a special spark inside?"

    Reika took one look to the right, grumbled, "No," and stormed off towards the main building looking unfulfilled.

    I could only sigh at that. That feeling though. I don't know how to really describe it. It's just something that you have to experience for yourself to fully understand. The one thing I am sure about about that I didn't feel it with Premala kissed me. I didn't feel the faintest hint. I didn't even feel the probability of its presence. I mean, it wasn't a particularly passionate kiss. But I didn't feel a thing. Was that my instincts speaking to me? Is it a bad sign?

    Could it be a red flag?
    Don't know what to put here.

  15. #45
    Poet Laureate AiedailEclipsed's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    In my own realm...
    Blog Entries
    Follow AiedailEclipsed On Twitter Add AiedailEclipsed on Facebook

    Default Re: The Story of Fritz Westmyn: The Turning World

    Okay, because I'm a lazy whore I'm gonna keep this short and pretty much gloss over most of these two chapters (I still haven't forgiven you for not giving me enough time to review :<).

    2-5: No major mechanics errors that I could see. Content wise... D'awww. Fritz is such a gentleman. And who knew that Aporon would be the sensible one? *eyeroll* And not so sneaky, sneak away. Nice. Although, they're going to be found out sooner or later and the goon squad is going to get payback. Nifty new characters/coordinators. And more evidence of my awesomeness. Yay me (okay, I picked two Pokémon, big whoop). And a rivalry! How nice. RUN THATCHER, RUN! I swear, that boy needs a hug. Quick note, that last battle with the two coordinators was really nice. Great description and everything. And back to Thatcher. Who is found by the magical hobos. I'm canonizing that now, just saying. Essentially, the end. I'll admit, I'm wee disappointed. I kinda wanted to see the rest of the contest. Or at least find out the winner.

    2-6: Grammar looked good. Onto the content! Oh, hey travelling through the woods, this is okay. Awww, they all went on a pic-a-nic! [/Yogi Bear joke] Wait. They went on a picnic? Wut. Oh. Hey, they want them to do manual labor. How predictable. And how mature. That old song thing? Wow. There is a bit of a logical problem as to why Fritz simply didn't use Tangela to get the berries and stay secure, etc. But we can overlook that! :p Okay, small complaint. From "A great idea. I'd better..." to "...I'm pissed off." I'm completely lost. Like what even happened right there? I mean, I get that they fell but its just like a big blog of dialogue sans description. Oooh, hey! Vespiquen. I rather like her. And Eevee comes out of nowhere and goes crazy "I will cut you" bitch on her. Well. That escalated quickly. Poor Vespiquen. I hope it'll be okay! Also, I wants to know about the Pokés he has back at home! Gloss gloss gloss~! CRAY CRAY GURL HAY! I mean, seriously. Was not expecting political activist from random psychic chick. And she's still mysterious. Kissing him for no apparent reason and all that. Reika was tolerable for the smidgen bit she was in here.

    So yeah. Looking forward to seeing the next chapter!
    "Be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it."
    -- Narrator, Pokemon: Jirachi Wish Maker
    "You can't change the world without getting your hands dirty."
    -- Lelouch Lamperouge, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion
    "Do I have a stamp on my forehead that says, 'The National Spokesperson for the Plight of Black People'? How the hell should I know the black perspective on The Color Purple? That's it, if I don't change classes, I'm gonna hurt this fool. Teachers treat me like I'm some kind of Rosetta stone for African-Americans. What? Black people learn how to read, and we all miraculously come to the same conclusion?"
    -- Victoria, Freedom Writers
    "N's heart is pure and innocent. But there is nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence."
    -- Concordia, Pokémon Black/White 2

Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts