6th March 2009, 11:42 AM #1
This is based on Pokemon Ranger.
Episode One: School Lesson
Location: Floaroma Headquarters
“So, what are you waiting for? Why can’t you just pick it up, and slam it on the ground really quickly?” A mysterious black-cloaked man said, stamping his foot.
“Well, it is rather heavy, know. Oh, why don’t you pick it up? Obviously there’s no way I can. Come on, pick it up!!!” The blue- cloaked woman replied.
“Humph. I’ll pick it up then.” The man struggled to pick it up. “GAAGH! I can’t! Just too…”
“No. It’s just too big. two people need to pick it up. You were right. It’s also too…heavy.”
“Hah! So you admit it! It’s too heavy…”
Location: Twinleaf Town
“Come on, big bro! Time to get up! Otherwise you will be late for ranger school! Kell-”
“Gah! What was that for??? You didn’t have to tickle me to death, sis!” Kellyn shreiked, jumping out of bed. “I would’ve got out of bed if you would’ve simply told me!!!” Kellyn walked downstairs.
“All right, student! as you’re leaving home today, how about a great breakfast! A full english! Egg, sausages, bacon, fried bread… and extra bacon! Eat up!” His mum genorously said.
“Thanks, mum! Oh, yeh! Isn’t this great! The last time you cooked this up was when you got a bucketful of money from the lottery! Thanks again, mum!”
“Okay, it’s time to go to school. See you this time next week!”
“Wow. This school is big. I had no idea it was this big.” Kellyn said, walking over to the door. He saw a girl.
“Hi! I’m really new! Whats your name?”
“Kell. Short for Kellyn.”
“Mine’s Kate. Short for….oh. Nothing!”
“Oh, you must be the new students.” A teacher said. “I’m Miss Sweet. Please, follow me to your classroom!”
“I guess where in the same class, Kate.”
“Yup. I wonder what our first lesson will be.”
“Please, everybody, invite your new classmates, Kellyn and Kate. You may ask them questions.”
“I’m Rhythmi. How old are you?”
“We’re both 11, I think.” Kellyn answered.
“I’m Keith. Where did you come from?”
“Lilycove City. That’s the contest city.” Kate answered.
“Oh my, it’s break. Everybody dismissed!!!”
To be continued…
6th March 2009, 10:17 PM #2
A black and white world
Re: Shinou Shadows
Where the heck is all the description? It's almost entirely dialogue!
6th March 2009, 10:25 PM #3
I'm Fired Up!
Re: Shinou Shadows
Let me help you on this, it is entirely dialogue. I mean the only thing besides that its the few words you used after the quotes. In other words you have no punctuation or description about anything.