3rd February 2006, 01:50 PM
Badass office lady
Before I start, let me explain a few things, since this fic is... weird. I was at school in the video editing room yesterday, looking through some old Newsweeks, and I was reading an article on that art installation that was in NY a few years ago, the Gates. The whole way through the article, the artists kept mentioning that the cloth in the exhibition was saffron, not orange. Needless to say, I had to do something with this in a fic. Enjoy.
"They're sharing a drink they call loneliness, but it's better than drinking alone."- Billy Joel, "Piano Man"
It was late that night. Inside a smoky bar in Saffron City, two of Kanto's most brilliant, dangerous minds sat, talking.
"I'm telling you, Sebastian, it just isn't right, dammit."
"Oh, yes, I'm well aware of that, Gio, my dear, but unfortunately, some things are just like that."
Normally, the meeting of two such minds would be a highly ominous sign of things to come, and nothing good for humanity would be likely to come of such an encounter. This time, however, was different.
Giovanni and Sebastian were drunk out of their minds.
"Why can't a man find a woman anymore?" He put his hand on Sebastian's shoulder and looked into his eyes pleadingly. "Why, Professor?"
Sebastian searched his mind for an answers. Here he was, the head of Team Rocket's research division, a man who was accepted into one of Kanto's most prestigious universities based on his senior year term paper grade alone (and given a full ride, no less!) and he couldn't find the answer to this question, an almost painfully simple one, that had been posed to him.
"I'm afraid that despite my vast scientific knowledge, I have no expertise in matters of the heart."
"No... someone's got to know... Come on, Sebastian, don't you, of all people, know?" Giovanni ordered another cocktail from the bartender, and stared into it. Yes, Sebastian would know, wouldn't he? The two had been close friends since college, when he would pay Sebastian to do his homework for him (Can't you study for once instead of partying all night? he was often asked, though he doubted Sebastian minded the extra hundred bucks in his pocket), and the only person he truly trusted anymore... Sebastian knew everything, right?
"As much as I'd love to answer your question, we are unfortunately stuck in the same boat," Sebastian said, true empathy in his voice.
"Ah, yes, that's right, the Good Ship Loneliness. The reason we're drinking in this hellhole in the first place."
Cries of "Amen, brother!" were heard from around the bar in response.
"Just wait, my friend... one day, that woman will sit down next to one of us, and she'll start talking... just you wait."
"But when, Sebastian? When? How much longer must we wait?" Giovanni slammed the glass on the table, causing it to shatter. Noticing this, he absentmindedly pulled some money from his wallet and passed it to the bartender. "Keep the change," he muttered to him, and the bartender looked at the wad of cash, avarice in his eyes. "The two most eligible damn bachelors in Kanto, and no one has seemed to notice yet. Why? We've got money, intelligence, power..." -Sebastian glared at him- "okay, maybe just me, but still..."
Sebastian sat in thought, the most he could manage while he was this wasted, though it was still far beyond the capabilities of the average person.
"Hm... I may have a theory."
"Do you really? What is it?"
"Oh, no, you wouldn't want to hear it."
"Tell me, Sebastian!"
Sebastian laughed, then looked at his friend, his face serious.
"Honestly, you really do not want to hear this."
"I do. Sebastian, I am ordering you to tell me."
Sebastian couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was Giovanni actually this desperate, to actually order him to tell him? Never mind that half the orders he gave, he gave whilst drunk, or while on a nasty hangover at the very least, but over something as trivial as the female species? Either way, Sebastian had no choice now.
"If that's what you want... my dear friend, perhaps it is your taste in fashion that turns off the ladies."
"You seem to be under the constant delusion that orange is fashionable. That's hardly the case, you realize."
"What?" He stared at Sebastian in disbelief.
"Exactly like I said."
"That's the most idiotic, brainless thing I've ever heard!"
"It's not orange, anyone with half a brain could tell you that!"
Sebastian couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"Then what, Giovanni, is it, pray tell?"
"Saffron. There's a clear difference there, between orange and saffron. Any fool knows that."
The bartender turned from counting his newfound fortune and gave Giovanni the same blank stare that Sebastian was giving him. Sebastian sat in silence for a moment, then spoke up.
"Saffron. If there's a difference, what is it exactly, then?"
"Well, Sebastian, it's just that..." Damn. Giovanni had never expected this, being caught off guard, but he was drunk and he knew it. No reason to be so hard on himself. "...Saffron is saffron, and orange is orange. Like an apple and a pear. They look almost the same, but they're completely different fruits."
"Fruit. Interesting you should mention that, Gio." Sebastian snickered. "...Fruit. Yes, that says quite a bit."
Giovanni looked up at Sebastian, indignation written in his eyes. He wasn't going to lose any battle of wits to one of his scientists, friendship be damned. He fired back with the first thing that came to mind.
"Really, Sebastian?" he asked coldly. "You wear a lavender labcoat."
Sebastian smirked, not bothered in the least by the salvo.
"Please, Giovanni. I prefer the term periwinkle." Sebastian got up and left the bar, content in knowing that he had won yet again.
It didn't matter who they were, no one outwitted Professor Sebastian. No one.
3rd February 2006, 04:19 PM
Neku!!! It's Great!!! You know I love this. I like your take on the kind of relationship that Sebastian and Giovanni have....I really like it. I hope you'll write more Seb and Gio in the future. Even if it's just for Line Inspiration. That was great. Not to mention, I *LOVE* "Piano Man". Extra bonus points there ^_^
3rd February 2006, 05:33 PM
I cant wait to see where you go with this. This fic has some potential. Also, compliments on Piano Man. I love that song.
6th February 2006, 05:41 PM
Badass office lady
...Most stupid fic I write about Giovanni (and there's a lot of that) is one shot, Kater. If it's chapter, I'll tell you in the beginning.
And Evil Azurill, I KNEW you'd like this.