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  1. #76
    The Ace of Aces Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Sadly we won't get to see what happens during the peeping session xD well we might if I manage to get myself to write that mini chapter I've been planning but we'll have to see.

  2. #77
    My life is forbidden Zidar Ravencrypt's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    I really enjoyed reading this. I am very interested to see what happens next. ^^

  3. #78
    Registered User IVI's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Sorry I'm late. (Ihave a new book and test week is starting)

    This was a nice filler. I'm happy to see some dialog from Fin. He can be prety entertaiming. (He is my favourite character.)

    Lets just say this was a good chapter. Not that you whrite bad chapters.

  4. #79
    Can I have a snack? Kihote's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Sorry it took me so long to post up this review, but can you blame me? I excel in the art of procrastination XD

    But on to the review, I like it. Each chapter is its own unique 'episode' within a larger plot which is shown through small events. This is quite well executed since you can basically pick up any chapter and read with very little questions aside from the chapters which are part of an arc. The setting seems to be quite well thought out, and it reminds me of duel academy. Each character is unique, as always, I guess that's what flavor you add to your writing, the unique characters that stand out on their own, I honestly feel like you could make a whole spinoff series for each one. There are almost no major grammar issues, and the flow is kept quite well, I find myself having difficulty to read a chapter in more than one sitting since once I start I can't stop staring at the screen. Can you tag me? I must learn what happens next :O

    Also making them part of the newspaper club is a great way to make sure they show up where the action is :P

  5. #80
    The Ace of Aces Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    No I'm the master in the art of procrastinating xD

    Thanks for saying that I actually like it a lot when people talk about my characters I focus on trying to keep them unique that being said I understand my character's personalities aren't exactly original but I always try to add my own spice to them so as to separate them from the usual stereotype.

    Actually I was planning on doing spinoffs for a few of the characters to detail their beginnings better but that idea went dead.

  6. #81
    Just Marcat Marcat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Hmm, having read the first Pokemon Academy. I have to say I see a number of improvements.

    I like the setting that seemed episodic in a way, that (from what I read so far) doesn't reveal any obvious plot, which resembles the first one. A number of the new plot elements are welcomed, making them the newspaper club for one. But some of characters seem a bit off, I don't mean the intial cast, I mean the newer ones. Stacy is a bit stale for me, the sexy teacher is a common element in many a manga/anime, and judging from the interactions with other characters it doesn't seem like she's going to evolve into a major character. However, Claudia, I must say, is a real breath of fresh air, a new character that gives you that vulnerable human feel that balances out the others. (...Plus I have a thing for shy girls XP). Also, the character interaction is top notch.

    You also seemed to have improved with your description and grammar, just remember to proof-read and edit. You have alot of right in this sequel, keep it up. Personally, I usually prefer sequels.

  7. #82
    The Ace of Aces Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    I think the sexy teacher is something that has been done in everything that involves a school xD that's the thing about Stacy she's not someone that shows her true personality to people she's just met it's part of her character since we still haven't gotten to know her better.

  8. #83
    The Ace of Aces Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    @AetherX ; @Thundagere ; @Rob Anybody ; @Jinoga ; @Instrutilus ; @Lugion ; @BlueNostalgia ; @Gastly's Mama ; @Tsutarja ; @Cosmos ; @Karpi; @IVI; @Octy; @Chaosj2 @Dragoneye

    Sorry for the delay but now it's time for a new chapter so hopefully this makes up for this. One thing I want to clear out is that I remember one of you mentioning the fact that there aren't any specific female characters that are dedicated trainers so...I'm gonna make you sorry for saying that with this chapter xD

    Chapter 8: Girlfriend?


    “Things sure have been a little boring now that we’re the only ones excluded,” Fin scratched the back of his head with clear boredom as he and Jack made their way outside of the main building’s gym. “Ever since Reggie and Miko joined the Newspaper Club, I don’t have anyone to hang out with, not even Darren.”

    “So that’s why you wanted to come to the gym with me?” Jack inquired as he wiped sweat off his face. It had been around three weeks since Reggie, Valerie, Miko and Darren joined the Newspaper Club leaving Marie, Jack, and Fin out. Unfortunately, Marie was part of the gardening club and her obligations meant it was just Jack and Fin.

    “Wait, didn’t you join the calligraphy club, though?” Jack raised an eyebrow to show his confusion. Fin just gave a halfhearted chuckle before looking away from him.

    “I got kicked out, there weren’t any cute girls contrary to what I thought. The ones I saw when I checked out where just looking,” He answered with a defeated tone; it was evident that he didn’t really want to talk about it. “So it’s just the two of us.”

    “I guess that couldn’t hurt but don’t get too close. I don’t want your annoyance to rub off on me,” Jack grinned; he was somewhat happy Fin was with him. “I still feel left out though.”

    “Man, we don’t need them! We can do whatever we set out for!” Fin cheered as he threw his fist in the air. “We should do some cool stuff. Make them feel bad that they left us out.” Jack just sighed with exasperation; he knew that when Fin got hot blooded about something it was bound to turn out badly.

    Something caught Jack’s eye as they passed the local coffee house though. Darren was sitting down opposite to a girl that seemed to be from the same dorm him due to the two of them sharing the same black uniform. “Hey. Is that who I think it is?” Jack pointed towards the coffee house; causing Fin to try and find what he was pointing at.

    “Oh my god, you’re right,” Fin gasped in disbelief while trying to make out the girl’s features. She had long black hair that was long enough to pass her waist, which contrasted with his white hair. Deep hazel eyes framed a rather argumentative face. “Who’s that girl? She’s kind of cute,” Fin grinned slyly.

    “Forget the girl. What I’m wondering is why our resident bad boy and loner is hanging out with her,” Jack pointed out; brining Fin towards the hallway so that they could hide better. “I’m not saying Darren wouldn’t be able to find a girl but he’s not the type of guy that gets along with people he just met,” he explained suspiciously.

    “Well, maybe the girl was the one that asked him and he’s just being polite,” Fin shrugged absentmindedly. “Like you said it isn’t impossible for him to get a girl.” He glanced down to see Jack whipping out his glasses.

    “Yeah, but I still think that there’s much more than meets the eye,” Jack stated; putting on his glasses with vigor and pride, making Fin deadpan.

    “I’m all for following them if that’s what you’re suggesting,” Fin nodded his head in agreement.

    “Yeah. Let’s tail them and see what’s happening between them,” Jack suggested; noticing that Darren and the girl had walked out of the coffee house and were heading for the elevator. “Speaking of which, looks like we should get going,” he turned to Fin before the two tailed right after the couple; waiting for the elevator to head down before they took the one on the other side.

    ***

    “Damn it, we lost track of them,” Fin groaned while throwing some branches aside as he and Jack tried to make their way through the forest path.

    After they had gotten out of the main building they ended up following Darren and the mysterious girl to the forest. Unfortunately, they had lost track of the two before they themselves got lost amidst the trees. “Why do you think they went in the forest in the first plac—AH!” Fin let out a sudden yell as a branch whipped back and hit him in the face..

    “Maybe they noticed us and decided it would be better to try and lose us from their trail?” Jack inquired as he scratched his chin in thought. “That just leaves me to think that they really are dating and Darren just doesn’t want anyone to find out. But still smells fishy.”

    “I don’t care how it smells, my head hurts!” Fin whined, he was patting his forehead to try and get rid of the pain.

    “Look at the bright side, at least now you know there’s something in there, instead of an empty skull,” Jack shrugged, not really caring about his friend’s injury.

    “Touche,” Fin added with narrowed eyes as he rubbed his forehead.

    “Anyways, we should keep going, they have to be somewhere around here,” Jack looked around the forest once more; though it was becoming hard to see through the now rising darkness. “Damn it, the sun’s starting to set already.”

    However, before they could take another step a loud explosion ran through the forest, causing the Murkrows that were still sleeping in the trees to fly off in fear. Jack and Fin both gasped, mostly because of the large cloud of smoke that was now rising from the ground and into the sky. “That’s not good...you think it’s them?” Fin wondered.

    “I don’t know but we’ll just have to find out now won’t we?” Jack stated and raced off; leaving Fin behind and causing him to run even faster so that he could catch up.

    Finally, after what seemed like endless running through the maze of trees they finally passed through a large crater; which was still letting out smoke. “What’s with this. It looks like someone was having a battle,” Fin pointed out as he looked around the field; noticing that there were some broken trees as well. “Maybe it was two wild Pokemon battling each other.”

    “No, the range of the explosion is too large. If it were wild Pokemon they wouldn’t fire strong attacks since it could hurt their natural habitat,” Jack explained sagely. He was kneeling down on the ground so as to get a better view at the range and power in the explosion. “Judging by this I’d say it was Blast Burn and Hyper Beam, the latter was probably used for attack and the former to counter it.” He explained.

    “I forgot you were a strategy geek,” Fin rolled his head. There was something strange about some of the trees that had been toppled down, they seemed to have various cuts around their trunks. “Hey, what’s this?” Fin leaned closer to the trunk and pulled out a small metallic splinter from the wood. “Looks like a piece of steel.”

    “Well, thank you, Captain Obvious.” Jack grabbed the piece of still and began inspecting it. “It should be part of a piece of armor according to its structure, so it belongs to a steel type...that is indeed odd,” he scratched his chin in doubt while looking around. Elemental Academy had various islands with multiple types of Pokemon in each one but Steel types were something that was rarely seem due to their more suburban feel. “It was definitely a trainer’s Pokemon.”


    “You know what? Why don’t we just ask Darren straight out?” Jack turned around and raised an eyebrow towards Fin. “Think about it. If he finds out we’re sneaking around behind him he’ll kill us. If we ask him ourselves, however, the worst that could happen is that he doesn’t tell us.” Jack sighed at Fin’s explanation; mostly because it actually made sense and it would definitely save them a lot of trouble.

    “All right, then. We should go to the Houndoom Dark dorm,” Jack nodded his head in agreement.

    ***

    “Open up, you asshole, we have some things we want to talk to you about!” Fin screamed, banging on the door. His rather ostentatious actions were attracting quite a bit of attention.

    “Fin, calm down, you’re just making people look at us weirdly,” Jack grumbled in annoyance before pushing Fin aside. “Darren. It’s Fin and Jack, we want to talk to you about something you did today.”

    “...You’re not gonna leave if I just ignore you, will you?” Darren asked from the inside.

    “Do you want Fin to knock the door again?” Jack narrowed his eyes.

    About a second later the door shot open, surprising even Jack and Fin as they entered the room slowly. “See,” Jack grinned smugly as the two looked around the room.

    There wasn’t a single light on inside, giving it a really obscure and scary mood. “Hey Darren, where are you?”

    “Changing!” Darren exclaimed. He walked out of the bathroom wearing a simple white shirt along with a pair of grey shorts. “I was showering when you started knocking like a runaway Slaking.” He let out a simple groan before gesturing for the two to sit down. “So what is it you guys want?”

    “We saw you sitting in the coffee house with a girl today,” Fin interrupted; not even giving Jack a chance to speak. “So we started following you because we were curious if you were on a date or not. Long story short we got lost and then we heard thi...

    “I’m gonna stop you right there,” Darren countered, holding his hand up so that Fin would pay attention to him. “That girl I was with is not my girlfriend of anything, far from it,” he shook his head with annoyance before sitting down.

    “You see her name’s Allison and she’s a first year.” Fin and Jack both looked at each other before turning back and focusing on Darren. “She’s been stopping by my room every day in the hopes of challenging me to a battle because she says she wants to be the strongest or something. Anyway she came to me in school today and...

    ***


    “Come on, just fight me once,” Allison whined, slamming her fists on the table as she looked at Darren with a begging look; which elicited a sigh from his mouth. “You don’t like me bothering you, and I just want a battle, so why can’t you just do it, you meanie!” she exclaimed, waving her arms furiously.

    “Listen, can’t you just fight someone else? I’m not exactly the strongest,” Darren sighed in frustration as he rubbed his temples.

    “Yeah, but you’re the only one that looks strong. You defeated that Jack guy in the tournament and Fin lost to Reggie who doesn’t even look like he’ll be able to fight for long,” Allison explained with crossed arms. “I swear that if you give me one battle I’ll leave you alone.” She nodded her head.

    Darren looked to his sides as if to check that no one was listening. He then sighed with exasperation as a sign that he had given up. “All right. Follow me, I know a place where we can battle quietly.”

    “All right. See you, can be a nice guy when you want to,” Allison giggled in response as she followed Darren.

    ***

    Allison and Darren were now standing in the middle of a battlefield drawn in the forest, with Darren shuffling through his Pokéballs to decide what Pokemon he would be using for the battle. “So this is your training field. It’s really secluded,” Allison said curiously, looking around and detailing her surroundings in full.

    “That’s the point. If the place is outside of people’s reach then I can train as much as I like,” Darren answered bitterly, finally grabbing a Pokéball that he could use. “So are you ready? I wanna get this done with already.”

    “Yep,” Allison winked before grabbing one of the Pokéball strapped to her hip and assuming a pitching position. “Prepare yourself, Darren Schifer, because I’m going to beat you before you even know what hit you,” Allison chuckled to herself before she threw the ball in the middle of the field; releasing a large Swampert.

    “All right then. I’ll go with this!” Darren threw his own Pokéball onto the field releasing his Charizard. However, Darren’s Charizard was different from the norm; it was jet black all over except for its flame.

    “Awesome! How did you get one of those? I’ve heard of black Charizards before but this is completely different,” Allison’s mouth fell agape in wonder; her eyes riveted on the black dragon. She then put her arms together and grinned widely before smirking. “Well, that just makes it better because I still have the type advantage. Swampert, attack it with Water Gun!” Swampert let out a loud roar and began firing various jets of water towards Charizard.

    “To the skies!” Darren yelled, looking as his Charizard swiftly flew into the sky and avoided the torrents of water that were being fired its way. Allison gritted her teeth before her Swampert stepped back and fired a large sphere towards Charizard; the sphere letting out gushes of water as it flew higher.

    “Dodge it and counter with Flamethrower,” Darren ordered as he threw his hand forward. Charizard roared in return to the order before flying away from the Water Pulse and firing a Flamethrower towards Swampert.

    However, the flames completely missed Swampert, instead encircling it in a ring of fire. “What are you doing? That’s one of the worst screw ups I’ve ever seen,” Allison yelled with a serious look crossing her face. “Swampert, use Water Gun once more,”

    Swampert nodded its head. Unfortunately, before Swampert could obey the order attack its body had already began to sweat; the resulting blast of water was pitiful when compared to the original. “Wait, what?!”
    “Your Swampert is a water type and as such it needs oxygen and hydrogen to produce the water efficiently” Darren pointed out. “Because it’s surrounded by my Charizard’s flames most of the oxygen it needs has been diminished. and as thus it can’t fire an attack strong enough to reach Charizard. Furthermore, it’s water supplies are being decreased by the heat, which is why it’s sweating. After a while, to produce water it must rely on it’s own oxygen levels, which means if you continue to use Water Gun, Swampert will eventually faint from lack of oxygen.”

    Allison stood agape; only for a grin to cross her face shortly after. “Good strategy, I didn’t take that into account, but I just thought of something better,” she snickered before throwing her hand up in the air. “Use Rain Dance, Swampert!”

    “...bitch...” Darren groaned once he felt a raindrop hit his cheek. Suddenly the sky began thundering and more raindrops started to fall from the sky.

    “How about we make it a two on two just to be fair,” Allison grinned. She knew that she had just put Charizard out of commission due to the rain, since Darren retired it almost immediately from the battle.

    “Sneaky bitch,” Darren swept his hair back, which was now slick from the rain. He looked up at the sky, noticing that, true to its ability, Rain Dance was only in effect around them. “All right then, if I use Honchrow then the water might affect its wing and Houndoom is another fire type...” he trailed off before grabbing a Pokéball from his belt. “All right then, I’ll go with you, Pikachu!” Darren screamed as he sent out a blue Pokéball. “Wait, that’s not Pikachu!” he yelled in shock and fear as a Pachirisu materialized over the wet grass.

    “Aww...how sweet! I didn’t think you’ll have such a cute Pokemon,” Allison cooed at the squirrel Pokemon; which was now scratching its ear while trying to keep away from the rain. “...kick his ass Swampert, I don’t want to hurt it too much.”

    Swampert nodded its head before firing a powerful Hydro Pump from its mouth; the resulting blast sent Pachirisu flying, barely stirring.

    “Damn you Fin,” Darren gritted his teeth and clenched his fist in frustration. “I just wanted to give you my Gyarados; I didn’t want your crappy squirrel.”


    Unfortunately for Darren he had forgetten about the trade that he had done with Fin the year before right before they went off to face against Charles. While Darren was originally planning on just giving Fin his Gyarados the latter didn’t think it would be a fair trade; of course, giving Darren his weakest Pokemon wasn’t fair either. Darren, however, due to not viewing the Pokémon a worthwhile, had yet to train it, instead using it as a testing dummy.

    ***

    “...wait a second here! I gave you my Pachirisu and this is how you treat it!” Fin interrupted, resulting in a groan of exasperation from Darren. “You can’t be anymore of a loser.”

    “Shut up and let me tell the story...” Darren moaned, before returning to the story.
    ***


    “Okay, I guess I can work something out. Use Agility to avoid its next attack Pachirisu.” Pachirisu nodded its head before it turned towards Swampert’s Bubble Beam, which was quickly making its way towards it.

    The little critter sped off, barely avoiding the bubbles by jumping from place to place. Unfortunately, as soon as it reached Swampert it stepped on a puddle. Pachirisu slipped and landed directly in front of Swampert. “He’s mine, use Mud Shot and finish him off in one shot!”


    “Actually, that’s just what I was going for. Discharge!” Darren smirked and suddenly, the sky lit up with a a blast of blue electricity that shot up into the clouds and surrounded Swampert; causing it to scream in pain before falling to the ground. “Quiz Time. If a water type that has just been coated in even more water and standing in a floor completely soaked in water is attacked by an electric attack from a Pachirisu that’s also soaked what do you think will happen?” Darren grinned smugly towards Allison.

    “...asshole...” Allison muttered loudly.

    “Tell me something that’s new. Even a Ground-type affiliation won’t stop a discharge of that strength.” Darren smiled.

    Allison grabbed a second Pokéball from her belt after returning Swampert and proceeded to send a Skarmory onto the field. The large metallic bird released a metallic screech and took to the air. “This will be easy.”

    “Nope,” Darren shook his head before returning Pachirisu; much to Allison’s dismay. “Because the rain stopped and I still have another Pokemon in stock. Charizard, make your return!” His Charizard took into the skies once more as soon as it was released; making its way towards the Armor Bird Pokémon.

    “Skarmory. attack with Steel Wing!” Allison screamed at the top of her lungs, signaling for her Skarmory to dive down and strike.

    Charizard held its arms up, allowing the Skarmory to collide with it. However, after absorbing the attack, Charizard held on and pulled Sharmory into a savage bear hug. “Wait, what’s going on?”

    “Seismic Toss!” Darren commanded as his Charizard proceeded to throw the Skarmory down with all the strength it could muster, causing it crash against the ground. “Let’s finish this.”

    “I don’t think so. Use Hyper Beam...

    ***


    Before he could finish telling the story Darren was interrupted by a loud knock from the door, prompting him to turn around and walk over. “Yes?”

    “I want a rematch!” Allison screamed so loudly that Fin jumped off from his seat in fear of what it could be. “I...I had something in my eye so I couldn’t see right, it was a cheap victory, cheap I tell you!”

    Darren saw Fin and Jack from the corner of his eyes and proceeded to say. “Long story short, I countered her Hyper Beam with a Blast Burn, blasted her Skarmory into the trees, and won the battle.” he explained, his face devoice of any emotion.

    “Told you,” Jack muttered so that only Fin could hear. “Hello Allison, I’m Jack and this is Fin, Darren was just telling us abou...


    “Yeah, I don’t really care,” Allison spat before going back to Darren. “I want a rematch, you cheating asshole. I deserve it!”


    “You said that if I gave you a match you’d stop bothering me. Well, I did, so why are you here?” Darren asked.

    “That doesn’t count!” Allison screamed in frustration. “I demand another battle and I’ll keep battling you until I win.”


    “Why?”

    “Cause I’m going to be the strongest trainer in this school at any cost and no one’s going to get in my way!” she pumped her fist in confidence before placing it against her chest.

    “Ah, young love, it expresses itself in so many ways,” Fin teased.

    “Shut it,” Darren gritted his teeth before sighing. “Okay, I’ll battle you again,” he groaned.

    “No, I don’t want to fight right now.” Those words were enough to make Darren gasp in shock, only for Allison to give him a simple beam. “I’d rather get to know you first before we fight again, plus I know I’d just lose the way that I am now. I just wanted to let you know that we’ll be fighting again soon,” she gave him a thumbs up and a grin before turning around. “Bye Darren.” She waved.

    “...bitch...”

    ***


    “Hey, why didn’t we appear in this chapter!” Reggie whined in annoyance before turning to Chigon. “I’m the main character, I should at least have a cameo, but I barely got mentioned!” he frowned.

    “CHI!!” Chigon whined in agreement to its owner before jumping onto his shoulder.

    End of Chapter 8
    Next Time: First Stop at Milstraton.
    Last edited by Flaze; 30th January 2012 at 08:30 AM.

  9. #84
    Can I have a snack? Kihote's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    The few grammar mistakes I managed to remember to write down:



    I laughed at this:
    “...wait a second here! I gave you my Pachirisu and this is how you treat it!” Fin interrupted, resulting in a groan of exasperation from Darren. “You can’t be anymore of a loser.”

    “Shut up and let me tell the story...” Darren moaned, before returning to the story.
    Same with the last paragraph XD

    Anyway, by the look of it, Allison is a sore loser….and will no doubt be bugging Darren….and anybody who shows strength. It was a great chapter as always, can’t wait to see what happens next XD

  10. #85
    My life is forbidden Zidar Ravencrypt's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    That's a pretty good chapter. I laughed at the part where Darren expected Pikachu, but it ended up being a Pachirisu.

    Nice job.

  11. #86
    The Ace of Aces Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Well I'm glad you both liked the Pachirisu scene I'm still trying to figure out what I'll do with the little guy though.

    Also like always I forgot to put this in the chapter but this chapter was actually the finale of the introduction arc so be prepared for the next chapter as a new arc begins.

  12. #87
    ポケモン Tsutarja's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    LOL@ Darren getting a Pachirisu. :D

    Still waiting for the plot.


  13. #88
    The Ace of Aces Flaze's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Quote Originally Posted by Tsutarja View Post
    LOL@ Darren getting a Pachirisu. :D

    Still waiting for the plot.
    Would it help if I said you're going to be sorry for asking that xD

  14. #89
    ポケモン Tsutarja's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Quote Originally Posted by Stellar Haze View Post
    Would it help if I said you're going to be sorry for asking that xD
    Bring it on, dude! :D


  15. #90
    Registered User IVI's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pokemon Academy Year II: Second Year Rhapsody

    Oh, I just love this chapter.

    Pachirisu is just so clumsy. I wonder how Fin got that thing anyway.

    Allison just can't accept she isn't the strongest trainer can she? I'm seeing a possible love affaire here.

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