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  1. #91
    Vile Insect. RaccoonGoon's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 15 up now! Comments welcome!)

    To be honest, this is just a filler. Next chapter Looker returns to I.P. HQ to start missions, and the whole Team Spade thing picks up. Anyway, enjoy Chapter 16.


    Chapter 16, Saga 3

    The silver moon was replaced by it’s equal, the golden sun. The sun made it’s way above the horizon, it’s vibrant rays warming the air.

    A few panes of light shone in through the large apartment window, falling upon a sleeping Looker’s face.

    He opened his weary eyes, wincing at the light. His clothes were piled up on the floor. Johanna, his apparent girlfriend and lover, also without clothes, had her tender head resting on his chest, snoozing gently.

    Without a sound he placed her head on a pillow and pulled away from the covers. He pulled on his pair of pants and silently sneaked out of the room to the kitchen.

    A cold drink of soda helped wake the young man up, the fizzy bubbles making him alert. He quickly downed the soda and tossed the empty can in the trash. Sitting down on the couch he looked up at a calendar.

    He had a little less than a week until his job as an International Police Agent started. He ran his hand through his messy hair, uncombed brown hair. The memories of the previous night flooded his mind, the look in Johanna’s eyes, the luscious curves of her body, and the brilliant moonlight that guided them.

    A ruffling could be heard coming from the bedroom.

    He couldn’t believe it. He had made love to her, she had made love to him.

    The pleased Looker leaned back and yawned.

    The bedroom door opened and Johanna stepped out, having on all her clothes.

    She walked up to Looker and sat down by him.

    “Let’s not tell my grandmother.” she murmured, hugging Looker around the neck.

    “Yeah…want some breakfast? I have some cereal, some waffles….” he asked, giving her a peck on the cheek.

    “Sure, that would be good.”

    The two ate a few waffles together sitting on the couch as the sun raised higher in the air. They were both silent, the other not sure what to say. They still cared for each other, yes, they both loved each other yes, but things were different now. Very different.
    Finally, Looker broke the silence.

    “So, you’re going to stay in Twinleaf Town while I’m gone?”

    “Yeah… how long will you be gone at a time?”

    “After every mission I get time off, so depends.”


    They continued to eat, tired eyes looking back and forth between the plates and one another, content smiles on both of them.


    The men of Team Spade stood and looked at the Steel-Flying Types, metal, bladed wings sharp, reflecting the sun. The flock of Skarmory pecked at the ground, fierce eyes and pointed talons working together.

    “Well, have your men catch them.” Vick Hayden said, arms folded.

    “We’re not Trainers, I’m surprised they can hold Pokeballs correctly.” replied the sickly looking man known as Rex.

    Mel, another member of Team Spade stood beside his leader. He already had a Pokemon as well- Mightyena.

    “They just have to throw it at them. How hard is that?” Vick hastily said, walking up to a man and snatching the Pokeball out of his hand.

    With one swift motion the man in the black suit threw the sphere at a Skarmory. It bounced off of its steel hide, clicked open, and bathed the Pokemon in a red light, beaming the creature up into the Pokeball. It fell to the ground and began to wobble. It wobbled once, twice, three times before a soft clicking noise sounded from inside, confirming the catch.

    “There. Easy. Now get to it.”

    Vick scooped up the occupied Pokeball and handed it back to the man.

    The gang of men went to catching the Pokemon that would aid them in flying. Rex and Mel also picked up a Pokeball and caught a Skarmory. They would need to fly too.

    Soon the flock of wild Skarmory was gone and each man had one clipped at their waist.

    “Good. I set your uniforms back in the bar. Go in and change quickly.”

    Team spade entered the run down bar and grabbed a rightly sized gray uniform, along with a similar pair of boots, gloves, hats, and goggles. On the center of uniform was a bold, black spade design, contrasting the gray fabric.

    The men changed quickly, discarding their civilian clothes on the floor. They were dressed in the gray uniform, goggles either dangling around their necks or resting on the bill of the uniforms billed hats.

    Rex hopped up on a pool table and addressed the group.

    “Ok Team spade, just because this Vick guy is funding us doesn’t mean I don’t lead us, got it?”

    The burly and cold faced men agreed, nodding slowly.

    “And Mel here is second in command, understand?”

    Again, the Spade Grunts nodded like mindless drones.

    “Ok, now lets go.”

    The Team spade leader hopped from the pool table and led them out the door.

    As the men filed out, Vick handed each one a few spare Pokeballs.

    “Use these to catch other Pokemon along the way, one Skarmory can’t do much.”

    They took the capturing devices and stored them on their belts also.

    Vick handed Rex a few papers and a global map.

    “These are you’re instructions and plans. Once the task is complete you and you only come to my estate in Hoenn.”

    Rex took the bundle of papers and stuffed them in his pocket.

    “Roger that. We’re out.”

    He turned and faced the Spade Grunts.

    “Goggles on! We’re taking flight Team Spade!”

    The rallied men adjusted their goggles and pulled them on, giving them an insect-like look. The swarm of Skarmory were released and the grunts climbed up on their backs, feeling the steel hide with their leather gloves. The silver, metal feathers blended in with the gray thread of the uniforms, making twenty blobs of grayness, ready for flight.

    “Lets go!!! To Kanto!!”

    Team spade, led by Rex took to the skies, Skarmories screeching as they went, the clanking of metal feathers ringing through the air.

    Vick watched his little pawns disappear along the horizon, gray blobs getting smaller and smaller. The man with the green eyes sneered.

    “Just as planned.”


    Johanna had returned to Twinleaf Town. Celia had agreed to look after his apartment. The future rents had been paid.

    It was time to get to work.

    Looker mad sure he had everything: Croagunk and his Pokeball, coat, I.P. badge, wallet, suitcase. All accounted for.

    The day before he went down to the suit store and bought a brand new suit. It was dark brown, almost a chocolate color. It matched his shoes well. He also bought a brand new red tie. This new suit fitted him perfectly and was also comfortable to him.

    Looker placed his suitcase by the door and turned to look at his apartment. The plain, normal apartment wasn’t his true home, technically. But to him, it was the best home he knew. He had found it, he had paid for it, he had took care of it. It was his apartment, no one else’s.

    He thrust his hands in his coat pockets, feeling the soft, aged fabric. The black buttons were polished, the end section dangled about his lower legs. The interior of the coat was coated with a blue, warming fabric, accenting the leathery outside. This was his father’s old trench coat, yes, but to him this old trench coat was a part of him, an extension of himself. He had wore the coat since he decided to make a difference, when he chose his dream to make a better world through justice and law.

    His hand wrapped around something sharp and smooth. He pulled it out to inspect further. It was “Ding Bat’s”, the wild Golbats tooth that had snapped off while the wild beast attacked him when he first arrived in Sinnoh. His first memory of this Region. His first trial. His first challenge. He looked at the scar it had left. His first injury in Sinnoh. He placed the tooth on the table.

    These nostalgic feelings swept over him, making him feel a warmth deep inside him that only he could describe. These memories were precious to him. These memories were so much better than the ones he had before his running away. Those memories were long gone, a chapter in his life that was over. He never grieved over his fathers death, never shed an useless tear. His eyes were never meant for crying or weeping. His eyes, his bold, dark eyes had a better purpose- his eyes saw all the ways this world needed help and justice.

    It finally hit him fully why Sailor Luke had nick-named him Looker all those years ago. It hit him like a Giga-Impact attack from a well trained Tauros. He had an idea why, because he looked of course, but this full understanding was a nice surprise.

    He chuckled and patted down his dark hair, turned around, and exited the door.


    Later that day he entered Pastoria City to the sight of the S.S. Condria, the International Police’s ship.

    He casually walked up to the loading ramp, flashed his badge to the guard, and boarded the large ship. He let Croagunk out to enjoy the scenery as the ship departed and began to sail through the sapphire blue ocean.

    The ship didn’t have as many passengers as last time, just the staff, crew, and the returning I.P. members.


    The next day, around noon, the S.S. Condria pulled up to the HQ, lurching to a halt. Looker returned Croagunk and promptly exited the ship. He followed the concrete pathway to the main office building, the gleaming windows and metal reflecting the sunlight.

    He flashed his badge to the guards at the entrance and was pointed to an elevator. The main building was buzzing with life. Agents and Officers running around, trained Pokemon doing errands, multiple computers buzzing and an array of phones ringing. Men on hand-held radios barked orders while female Officers filed papers and tuned in to air frequency with head sets. It was truly like a normal local police station, only much, much larger. That, and it was ten stories high.

    He clicked a button reading “Deployment” on the button panel inside the elevator. Looker felt himself rising, the dial above the elevator door dinging at every level until level eight, where it stopped as the double elevator doors opened.

    The eight story was much like the first, only a lot less organized and with more new Deputies and the like running around.

    In the middle of the mess, Officer Stan Lyke stood, trying to walk through the crowd of busy people. Despite being inside, he still wore his shades and still had the same un-kept sideburns.

    “Looker!” he shouted, waving his arms. “Looker buddy! Over here!”

    Looker smiled at seeing his friend and navigated his way to the older gentlemen.

    “Ok man, follow me to my personal office….”

    The two walked to a small office. The room was full of movie posters, whacky toys, and comic books, things not associated with criminal justice. It looked more like a toy shop that had exploded, with action figures scattered everywhere and an array of video games stacked on a small table. An old metal filing cabinet was placed in a corner, the bottom portion having a tag stamped on it reading “pranks”.

    “Nice office.” Looker said, finding a chair and sitting in it.

    “It helps me think. As long as I do my job they let me bring anything in here.” Stan replied, clearing a space on his desk by placing box of random items on the floor, next to another clump of childish items.

    He then went over to a wire basket and picked up a thin manila folder and threw it down on the desk between them.

    “First case: Case #1413, sinnoh based.”

    He flipped open the folder, revealing an info sheet.

    “Sinnoh based Officers took note of a bar suddenly closing one day, out of the blue. Shady business is suspected, as no authorities were contacted about the structural damage….”

    “Structural damage?”

    “The door was ripped clean from its hinges, probably a Pokemon attack.“

    He flipped another page, showing a snapshot of a blurry black and white scene of a wrecked door.

    “This case is current, just opened a few days ago. Our job is to find the owner and interrogate him on what he knows. Think we can handle it?”

    Looker stroked his chin and chewed it over in his mind.

    “Lets get to work!”

    There it is, chapter 16!

    Thanks for reading, and if you did read, please leave a comment! They always help! Tips and criticism also welcome!

  2. #92
    I need beer money dammit! Rob Anybody's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 16 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Not bad for a filler.
    I don't calculate stat values, and I don't care about natures. I catch my Pokemon the way they are. I just play the game normally. If you agree copy & paste this in your sig.


    Garrus Vakarian Facts

    My Fic: Fabricati Diem, Pvnc Help a struggling writer! Read and review! Constructive criticism is much appreciated!

  3. #93
    Registered User NeoMiniTails's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 16 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Hehe, so I read part one and two... I'll go on to read the chapters later. I really liked it and it's a good thing that you chose to continue the story rather than just end it there...

    I really did like your "one-shot" although for extended purposes, I'll call it your "prologue" to the story. On the immortal... Looking part... I think a more effective word choice couldve been: Like an immortal, no, a god, he looked and with each moment, he judged the world around him, this cold, heartless world.

    I also enjoyed how you gave Looker the name, having a Sailor give him the name.

    I don't think Looker wouldve had any problem travelling seeing as it's normal in the pokemon world for a ten year old to start their journey...
    Can you hear me?

  4. #94
    Vile Insect. RaccoonGoon's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 16 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Quote Originally Posted by NeoMiniTails View Post
    Hehe, so I read part one and two... I'll go on to read the chapters later. I really liked it and it's a good thing that you chose to continue the story rather than just end it there...

    I really did like your "one-shot" although for extended purposes, I'll call it your "prologue" to the story. On the immortal... Looking part... I think a more effective word choice couldve been: Like an immortal, no, a god, he looked and with each moment, he judged the world around him, this cold, heartless world.

    I also enjoyed how you gave Looker the name, having a Sailor give him the name.

    I don't think Looker wouldve had any problem travelling seeing as it's normal in the pokemon world for a ten year old to start their journey...
    Why, thank you very much. Its always nice to gain a fan.

    Mikey Boy- thank you as well, this was one of my least favorite chapters to write.

  5. #95
    Vile Insect. RaccoonGoon's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 16 up now! Comments welcome!)

    After a (too) long break, and after I somehow got over my Writer’s Block, (and lazy butt), I finished a somewhat mediocre Chapter 17. After Chapter 16 I could not think of a good way to write the next few chapters. I have a long term story though out, but making it work is the tricky part. My deepest apologies for not updating in so long, school work has taken away a lot of time, (Ask Ultra Pidgeot and Lugion), which is why some other writers may be slow on updates. I’ve rambled on long enough I suppose.

    If you even remember this, haheh, here is Chapter 17 of “Look”. Enjoy.

    Chapter 17

    Officer Stan rose from the desk and walked towards a closet, kicking various items out of the way.

    “Ok, we’re almost ready to head out, but first……”

    He flung open the thin door, an avalanche of transforming robots and candy dispensers fell around his feet.

    “I..uh, can explain those…” he said sheepishly as he dug through the closet.

    Finally, he retrieved a small box from the depths of the closet. The cardboard container was bent and old, and the bottom was beginning to rip apart.

    He sat back down and pulled out a notepad and pen.

    “Here, put these in your pocket. You’ll need these to take notes, which will come in handy.”

    Looker took the items and placed them inside his trench coat, the left pocket to be exact.

    Stan pulled a pair of silver handcuffs. The metallic restraints looked brand new, light reflected off the metal chain.

    “Whenever you make an arrest, use these.”

    He slid the handcuffs to Looker, who placed them in his left coat pocket as well.

    The third item dug from the box was a slim, small card of some sort. It was dark blue and had a golden stripe running through it.

    “This is a credit card, a I.P. credit card. Use it for hotel, restaurants, anything you need while on a case. The HQ treasury up here will take care of it.”

    Looker placed the plastic card inside his wallet and slipped it in his back pocket.

    Stan again reached into the box, as if still searching for something.

    “Hm, Can’t find the radio….. I could have sworn it was in here the last time….”

    Stan placed the box upside down and began to shake it with little success.

    “Oh well, you won’t need one yet if you’re with me.”

    He threw the box aside and stood up.

    “Ok, lets go.”

    “Finally!” Looker exclaimed as he hopped up from the chair.

    The two stood up and exited the building.


    Looker and Stan boarded a small skimmer, named S.S. Thermal. The smaller vessel had a similar paint job to the S.S. Condria, only with lighter accents.

    “Looker buddy, this little dandy will get us to Sinnoh faster than a Ninjask on a sugar rush!”

    Stan adjusted his sunglasses and firmly gripped the metal railing of the boat.

    “Neat. So, how lo-”

    Before the I.P. Agent could finish his sentence, the skimmer hummed to life and instantly exploded from the dock, sending out a huge back wake. The boat cut through the vivid blue water like a mighty blade, and the motors churned with a great force.

    “Fast, eh?” Stan asked, grin on his face.

    Looker had to struggle to remain standing on the wooden deck, the velocity of the ship was amazing.

    “Heh, yeah. Real fast.”




    A large, calm shadow was cast over the grey town known as Pewter City.

    The town was wedged in between the lush Viridian Forest and Mt. Moon, the main mountain in the Kanto Region. Mt. Moon was the cause of the large shadow that blanketed the city, but to the residents of Pewter City, it was just part of the scenery.

    The two main attraction in Pewter were the Gym, led by a young man with spiky brown hair, a scruffy five o'clock shadow, and narrow eyes, the cause of this unknown. The second main sight in the town was the Museum, boasting in fossils and other rare oddities- Like the Pure Platinum Meowth Coin.

    The Museum had no security, mostly because absolutely NOTHING, let alone crime, happened in Pewter. It was for the most part, like one of the rocks it boasted in- dull.

    But that would soon change.


    The skies above Pewter City had nineteen Skarmory circling above it, each one holding a rider wearing a dark uniform. One Skarmory in the center of the group held a man with greasy hair and wicked eyes.

    “All right men!” Rex, the leader of Team Spade, called out.

    “ Mel and I will take care of the owner of the Museum. Tim, Tom!”

    Two identical twins broke from the ring of the flying creatures and veered over to their leader.

    “I want you two to find the Platinum Meowth Coin.”

    “Yes sir!” The twins said in unison.

    Tim and Tom flew back to the others and continued scanning the area below them.

    “Bob, Rod! You two will lead a group to make any citizens stay put until we leave, got it?”

    One man in the group, a dark skinned man with charcoal eyes and short hair nodded in agreement while another cackled madly and rubbed his hands together, a silly move considering how far away he is from the ground.

    “Ahhahah! Stupid citizens! Ahahah!” Jim started to bounce up and down on his Skarmory, much to the Pokemon’s dismay.

    “Will you shut up for one second?” Bob asked with a gruff voice.

    Rex called out another order.

    “Lou, you make sure nobody comes in the door!”

    “Yes sir!” A Team Spade Grunt with blonde hair sounded off.

    Rex now held out his right fist, fingers clenched.

    “Ok Team Spade! Lets go in, get the coin, and get out!”

    At this all twenty men cheered and yelled before they dove towards the Museum, Skarmory Screeching.

    The steel-skinned Pokemon landed, iron talons cracking the concrete around the building.

    Like clock work the men of Team Spade dismounted and withdrew the Skarmory into their Pokeballs and rushed into the building, pushing aside pedestrians outside the museum.

    Once inside Rex and Mel rushed towards the front desk and hopped over the counter. Mel threw out his Mightyena, who bared his sharp canine teeth.

    “You just stay right where you are, tootse.” He commanded the now frightful clerk.

    Rex threw open the door to the main office, where a man in a suit and glasses was seated behind.

    “Hey, you can’t be back here!”

    “Oh can’t I?” Rex chuckled as he released Sandslash.

    “Gads! What are you doing?” The Museum Manager asked the crook while backing away from the desk.

    “Nothing yet. Just keep quiet and still and my pal here won’t cut you to shreds, got it?”

    The manager gulped as beads of sweat formed on his forehead.


    Screams and gasps emitted from the main display room as Team Spade ransacked the place.

    They tipped over ornate glass display cases, smashed in glass cabinets, and threw picture frames off the wall.

    “Hey!” Bob called out to the group of thugs.

    “Boss just said to keep the people still, not destroy the place!”

    The yell was in vain as the men still continued to vandalize the once gorgeous showing room.

    Some people tried to run, but were blocked by Spade Grunts.

    One man managed to pass a few of them, but was kicked right in the ribs by Rod, twisted smile on his face at seeing the man writhe in pain.

    “Ahehehea! Oh glorious suffering!”

    “Rod, have I ever said you’re one messed up guy?” Bob asked his companion.


    Two identical twins ran down another hallway, peering high and low for the Platinum Meowth Coin.

    “It must be-” Tim started

    “-Around here somewhere!” Tom finished his brothers sentence, as if knowing what he would say.

    The two finally came upon a small glass case resting upon a metal stand. Inside was a bright, reflective pill shaped item. The Platinum Meowth Coin.

    “Aha! It looks like-”

    “-We found it!”

    The two brothers slapped hands and placed their arms around one another shoulders and pressed their faces against the glass, admiring the magnificent treasure.

    “It sure is-”

    “-Bright and shiny!”

    The coin seemed to gather the light around it and make it glow even brighter, giving it a pulsing aura around it’s metallic surface.

    Tim darted up and leaned back, balling his left hand into a fist.

    “A little help here, bro?”

    “Sure thing, bro!”

    Tom also reared back, but he clenched his right fist. Together the brothers punched the glass at the same time, shattering it, sending small pieces of glass flying around the room.

    “It looks like-”

    “-We finally made our ‘break through’!”

    The twins chuckled as Tom grabbed the Platinum Meowth Coin and ran back to the main showing room.


    There it is, Chapter 17! This wasn’t supposed to be the best chapter ever, mostly because I still have a little Writer’s Block going on, but if I get back into the habit of writing I should be fine.

    Um, to be fun- 20 points to whoever can pick up the pattern in the Team Spade Members. (Shouldn’t be hard)

    As always, my eternal thanks to all who read! You guys are great! Comments, tips, and criticism welcome!

    Oh, and the Gym Leader is Brock's dad, by the way.
    Last edited by RaccoonGoon; 27th November 2010 at 01:37 PM.

  6. #96
    Brock's Pikachu LightningTopaz's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 17 up now! Comments welcome!)

    The Transformers and PEZ dispensers made the episode, no question
    My URPG stats: Maya's status

    SuBuWriMo status: 28,103 words in all!

  7. #97
    CEO of the Monsters Lugion's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 17 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Good, but you still could work on expanding your thoughts.

    I don't mean to sound like Mrs. S, but there were some places that I felt could have used some more description, maybe a little longer dialogue.

  8. #98

    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 17 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Remind me to use the phrase "faster than a Ninjask on a sugar rush" when describing speed in Pokemon from now on.

    Good chapter, as always. Looking forward to 18.

    Thanks to ShinySandshrew of serebiiforums for the banner!

  9. #99
    Vile Insect. RaccoonGoon's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 17 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Chapter 18, Saga 3.

    Looker and Officer Stan exited the S.S. Thermal, which was docked at Pastoria City’s dock.

    “Ok Looker, it’s about 3 o’ clock now. We only have a few more hours of daylight, and we still have to get to the Solaceon Town bar….I say we start now, stay at the Pokemon Center there, and get to the case first thing tomorrow.”

    Looker placed his thumb and forefinger on his chin and thought it over. It would be nice if they had a full day to work on it, and it would take the rest of the day to get to Solaceon Town. Seemed like a good plan.

    “Sound good to me, Stan.”

    “Great, we’ll take route 212 up to Hearthome, then go along Route 209 to Solaceon.”


    The land west of Pastoria City was nothing but a stretch of wet grass and mud, almost like the Great Marsh.

    “Geh, I’m getting all muddy!” Looker exclaimed, raising his right foot and shaking mud off.

    “You’re muddy? Look at me!”

    Stan was waist deep in thick mud, stuck.

    “Here, let me and Croagunk help.”

    Looker released his Pokemon, which glided through the brown goop easily, and grabbed hold of the mans right arm. Looker grabbed his left arm.

    “Croa- Croa- gunk!”

    The two pulled up on the older man, freeing him from the mud. His pants were completely covered in mud, as well as the bottom half of his coat.

    “Ah! Damn it, of all the-”

    Stan adjusted his sunglasses and made sure his mutton chops were clean.

    “Let’s get out of here. I hear that sometimes this Route gets rained on, and I don’t want to-”

    Before he could finish a clap of mighty thunder sounded from the sky and tiny pellets of rain began to fall.

    Stan rambled off a string of obscenities that Looker had learned from the sailors. He chuckled, trying to hide it from his Senior Officer.

    Looker fastened his trench coat and returned Croagunk. Stan dug his hands into his pockets and began to walk through the mud, becoming more slippery and muddy as the rain softened it.


    The two walked past a large, brick mansion and turned north. At this point the rain stopped and the grey clouds dissipated, revealing the glowing sun.

    Looker had remembered this part of the Route, he had walked down it before cutting through the Great Marsh to get to Pastoria.

    They continued to walk, Stan whistling some classical song, hands dug in his muddy pockets.

    He seemed happy, even when he was half covered in mud. Sure, he had outbursts, like when it started to rain, like he was a little kid. His office back at HQ was full of toys and other childish items, and it seemed he didn’t have a care in the world. Was he just doing this for fun? Did he just do this as a joke, a gag?


    “What’s up Looker?” Stan asked his younger partner.

    “Nuh-nothing. Just thinking.”


    The two men in I.P. Uniforms entered Hearthome, made their way downtown, past the contest Hall, and took a right towards Route 209.

    Once out of the city and onto the route they took a rest at a small body of water, where Stan splashed some of the cool water on his pants, cleaning the mud off.

    After a 20 minute break they raised up and walked on, going North through tall grass, hills, and past tall, narrow, white marble tower.

    Finally, after using the rest of the day to travel, they walked into Solaceon Town. It was a small town, very small. It had the traditional Pokemon Center and Pokemart, as well as a Pokemon Day-Care. North, past the actual town, a small Café stood to aid travelers. To the East of town was a strange cave along with a few more small houses. The ground in solace on Town was dusty and dry, and it made a soft crunching noise whenever you step foot on it. The townspeople consisted of burly men in cowboy hats and overalls, young girls also wearing cowboy hats and western wear, and elderly people who enjoyed the moderate temperature. It was a quant little town, the last place to expect a criminal act. Or so Looker though until he saw the shoddy looking bar at the edge of town.

    The building itself looked like it could use an upgrade, and all the windows were boarded up with plywood, and a metal door was hinged at the entrance. The door looked alien and out of place with the plain looking walls. It had obviously been replaced with the crumpled, wooden door leaning against the side of the building.

    “This is the place.” Stan said while recording something on a note pad.

    “Hm, looks real friendly…” Looker replied, sarcasm obvious.

    “Yeah, get use to it kid. We’re not paid to go take care of the friendly stuff.”

    The two figures stood looking at the sad excuse for a bar as the sun set blow the horizon. A slight wind blew in from the south, bring with it a gush of warm air. This was what Looker’s first case would be: In a small little town solving what happened at a bar. That will lead to clues, which will lead to the criminals, which will lead to an arrest, which will lead to justice.

    Justice. The one thing Looker wanted most.

    “Lets get to the Pokemon Center for tonight, we’ll start tomorrow.”


    “Rex! Rex! We found-” Tim, the twin with blue eyes began.

    “-The Platinum Meowth Coin!” Tom, the brother with green eyes finished.

    The two ran into the small office, where the Team Spade leader, Rex, was making sure the Museum Manager wouldn’t move.

    “Good, good. Me and our ‘friend’ here were having a chat. Ahehehe….”

    Rex held out his hand and out-stretched his narrow fingers. Tom placed the treasure in his boss’s hand.

    The Manager, with nervous sweat running down his face spoke up.

    “Ple-please, not the Meowth Coin… you can’t…..”

    Rex plaved the Meowth Coin in a pouch attached to his belt and crouched down eye level to the be-speckled man.

    “Can’t. Can’t? You always say that word….”

    Sandslash, feeling his master’s aggression, puffed up it’s back spikes and flexed it’s claws.

    Rex continued, inching closer.

    “We’re Team Spade, we CAN do whatever we please! You understand, you fat sack of meat. We CAN steal, we CAN say whatever, and you CAN’T stop us, understand?”

    He was yelling now, vein in his neck bulging. The Manager now had his eyes closed, trying to block this sinister man out of his mind.

    “Look at me, you fat fuck.”

    The Manager refused to open his eyes.

    “I said LOOK AT ME!”

    He slapped the frightened man across the face, but still, the hostage refused to look.

    Tim and Tom looked at one another, at the scene going on, and nodded before stepping out of the office.

    “Fine, have it your way. Sandslash, cut this punk a new hole.”

    The vicious Ground-Type raised it’s mighty claws above it’s head, tightened it’s focus, and used a Slash Attack. Sandslash’s claws glowed for an instant as the man’s torso split open, cracking ribs, puncturing his chest cavity, and causing blood to explode from his body.


    The Manager clutched the bloody gash running down his chest and looked up at Rex and his Mouse Pokemon with sheer terror in his eyes. He let out a few heavy breathes and slowly closed his eyes. He was dead.

    “Feh. Idiot should of looked when I told him to. Sandslash, return.”

    The crook turned murderer shut the office door behind him. He wanted to leave the police a surprise.

    Mel withdrew his Mightyena, much to the relief of the pinned-down clerk, and followed his leader.

    Rex called out to the rest of Team Spade.

    “Ok, we’re moving out. Follow me once we take off! Lets go!”
    The twenty men scrambled out of the museum and instantly released their Skarmory. Once each member was on a flying beast, they ordered their Pokemon to take off. The sound of metal plates clanging together sounded as the steel-skinned Pokemon took to the skies and East away from Pewter City. The Pewter City Police force, hesitant to enter the Museum do to the civilian hostages, tried to order their Growlithes to shoot Ember Attacks at the thieves, hoping the Type Advantage would stop them. However, the Skarmory flew off fast enough to get out of range from the fire Type attacks, making the Police Force pointless.

    Pewter City, the dullest town in Kanto, suddenly became the main focus of the Region. The once plain, simple city was attacked and robbed.


    Vick Hayden dug the corkscrew deeper into the cork, until he finally he pulled up, and with a pop the small fizzy bubbles showered his hand.

    He say down next to the large, spotless window, overlooking the brilliant blue ocean Hoenn is known for, although it was darkening along with the sky. He poured the dark colored wine into the glass and took a sip. He let the liquid travel slowly down his tongue, making sure to make the flavor last. He was in no hurry, after all. He had all the time in the world.

    He set his drink down and walked over to a vintage record player, probably antique. Soon, the smooth sounds of classical music filled the large dining room.

    Vick went to go sit back down at the large wooden dinner table. He took another sip of his fine aged wine and continued to stare at the endless ocean as the orchestra played. In the distant he could see the faint outline of Ever Grande City to the south.

    He loved being on his private manor away from the rest of the Region.m he loved the rich luxury he lived in. He had money yes, but the main thing he yearned for was even more wealth. He knew that wealth brought power. Sweet, sweet power.

    Another drink.

    Suddenly, his small, compact cell phone began to vibrate. He flipped it open and held it up to his ear, wine still in one hand.

    “This is Hayden.”

    “We got your Meowth Coin.” the voice on the other end said. It was Rex. The sound of his voice with the occasional gust of wind. He must be flying as they speak.

    “Excellent. Follow my directions and bring it to me. You still have the map, correct.” Vick wanted to jump and shout, but kept his cool, and instead stood and began to pace back and forth in front of the window.

    “Yes, we’re on our way. We may have to stop, it’s getting dark and our Skarmory are getting tired.”

    “That’s fine, just do not bring any attention to yourselves.”

    “Yeah, yeah. Don’t worry.”

    Vick was beginning to grow annoyed of Rex’s disrespectful responses. He tightened his fingers around his glass.

    “Good. I’ll be expecting you tomorrow.”

    He slapped the phone shut and placed it back in his pocket.

    Another drink.

    “Perhaps…..” he began, talking out loud.

    “Once the coin is in my hands, I’ll…..’dismiss’ Rex and his little gang…..”

    Another, longer drink.

    The glass was now empty.

    Everything was going as planned, everything fell into place perfectly.

    The suave looking man refilled his glass with some more wine, sat down, and pulled his phone from his pocket once more. He scrolled through the contacts until he hit a name he wanted. He called it, told them something, bid them good evening, and hung up. The pattern continued until it was pitch black out. In between each call, he took a sip of wine. A call, a farewell, a drink. A call, a farewell, a drink. An hour later, Vick’s phone clacked shut and his empty glass clinked against the table.

    Everything was going just as planned.

    Vick Hayden cut off the record player and went to bed.


    No “after comment” this chapter.

  10. #100
    good cyberdaddy Ultra Pidgeot's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 18 up now! Comments welcome!)

    “Look at me, you fat fuck.”

    The Manager refused to open his eyes.

    “I said LOOK AT ME!”


  11. #101
    Vile Insect. RaccoonGoon's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 18 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Ultra Pidgeot View Post
    “Look at me, you fat fuck.”

    The Manager refused to open his eyes.

    “I said LOOK AT ME!”

    Whoa! Just noticed that! I was originally inspired by a scene in The Shawshank Redemption, but wow...that works!

  12. #102
    Fanfic Writer some colour no doubt's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 18 up now! Comments welcome!)

    He say down next to the large, spotless window
    I take it you mean sat down? haha

    anyways, onto the chapter. It was well written, though sometimes it was lacking description, leaving your paragraphs small. Just the odd part here and there would flesh it out a bit, without changing the core of the piece itself.
    I particularly liked the line
    Sandslash, feeling his master’s aggression, puffed up it’s back spikes and flexed it’s claws.
    It shows a great link between pokémon and trainer.
    Overall, very good! Grammatically sound, any mistakes in there took nothing away from reading it, i'll take a closer look at the rest in the next few days!

  13. #103
    Vile Insect. RaccoonGoon's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 18 up now! Comments welcome!)

    Chapter 19, Saga 3.

    “Find anything yet, Looker?”

    “Nope, this place is just a normal, seedy bar.”


    Looker, Stan, and Croagunk were searching the Solaceon Town bar for any clues leading to where the strange group of men had went. What was the purpose for taking residence at the bar? Where did they go? Why hadn’t the owner of the bar contacted local police?

    Stan was flipping tables, examining the bottom of the table. Looker picked through cabinets of bar mugs and bottles, and Croagunk dug through bowls of peanuts, occasionally eating a few.

    “Ok, you stay here. I’m going to the local police station to see if they have any information.”

    Stan jotted a few things down in a notebook and quickly exited the bar.

    Looker continued to investigate. Decks of playing cards were strewn on the tables, billiards were resting atop of pool tables, and empty mugs littered the bar area of the tavern.

    He was about to go into the backroom when something caught his eye. A small snip of paper or paper-like item was pressed under an empty glass. He raised it up, revealing a photograph, apparently left there on accident.

    The snapshot was of a brilliant, radiating item with a pill like shape. It looked like a Japanese oval charm, like the ones embedded in Meowths heads. Only this one, instead of a golden yellow, this seemed to be made of a shinier, more reflective material. Even when photographed it was almost blinding to look at, the memorizing treasure casting a reflective glare near the corner of the photo.

    Looker placed his thumb and forefinger on his chin and began to think. Why would a photo pf this be here? What did it have to do with this bar? He placed the photo in his pocket, Stan would surely want to see it right away.

    “Ok Croagunk, lets go find Stan! We found a clue!”

    Croagunk was beamed up into his Pokeball and placed inside Looker’s coat pocket. He made his way towards the door.

    Right as he extended his hand to turn the knob, the door was pulled open by Stan, wild look on his face.
    “Looker! The owner came clean!” Stan clasped Looker’s shoulders, shaking him with every word.

    “Huh? He gave us information?” He broke free from the older man and straightened his coat.

    “Yes! He says a gang, a group of thugs took over his bar! Then he says just a day ago he was on his way here to confront them, but they all flew off on Skarmory!”

    “Really? How many were there?” Looker reached for the photo, excitement growing inside him.

    “He said around twenty! And I just got a call from HQ! The museum in Pewter City, in Kanto, was just attacked by a group of men…..riding Skarmory!”

    Looker nearly exploded. He hurriedly retrieved the photo of the strange coin and held it up to Stan’s face.

    “Did that museum have anything like this in it?”

    Stan let his jaw hang lax as he examined the treasure.

    “Looker…….we have to get to Kanto.”

    “That’s at least a two day trip!”

    Looker wasn’t really sure of where Kanto was in relation to Sinnoh, but he knew it wasn’t anywhere close.

    “Arg…..I’m still prohibited from using that Pokemon…….”

    Stan began to place back and forth, teeth chattering in a worried fashion.

    “What Pokemon? You have Pokemon on you?”

    “Well…yes, but we…me and my Pokemon, kinda played a prank back at HQ…..”

    “So you can’t use it? It’s yours!”

    Looker couldn’t believe this. They had found a lead to a case and they were standing there.

    “Yeah…. I can’t use it unless it’s an emergency…..”

    “I’m pretty sure stopping this criminal gang from robbing a museum is an emergency!”

    He was getting annoyed at waiting there. Time was of an essence.
    “Fine, but if I get another refraction for this I’m blaming you….”

    And with that he threw down a Pokeball, releasing his Staraptor. The part Flying-type spread it’s formidable grey-feathered wings, cawed from it’s sharp beak, and stretched it’s mighty talons, tipped with black. Staraptor turned to face it’s master and looked to him, to Looker, and back to him.

    “Hey Staraptor, I’m bending the rules a little bit. Think you can carry two people to Kanto? Pewter, to be exact?”

    The athletic looking Staraptor simply nodded it’s head and puffed out it’s broad chest.

    “Great! Ok Looker, hop on and hold on tight.”

    Stan hopped on Staraptor’s back and helped Looker up. The two barely had enough room to fit.

    “Staraptor, Fly!”

    In a puff of grey feathers Staraptor threw it’s wings back, kicked off the ground, and started to fly higher and higher into the sky. Stan held onto Staraptor’s neck and Looker held onto Stan’s back while his brown trench coat blew in the wind

    This whole time they could of flown to solace on Town instead of wasting a day walking there. But, due to Stan’s pranks, they couldn’t. Looker wanted to face palm, but was afraid he would fall off, or wanted to complain, but decided against it. Staraptor leveled off and was beginning to flap it’s large wings at a steady pace. The outline of Mt. Coronet was already in view, and beyond that the faint skyline of Jubilife City was visible.

    The Sinnoh Region below him sped by, a mixture of green and brown melted into one another as one zipping past him. It was a strange feeling. Whenever he would look down, it seemed they were traveling by jet plane, but whenever he looked at the clouds he was flying by, it seemed like a much slower pace.

    “Pretty neat, eh? A Pokemon that knows Fly is a great, great thing!”

    Stan shouted, making his voice heard through the rushing wind.

    Looker shouted back. “Yeah! How long until we get there?”

    Stan nudged Staraptor to a higher elevation before responding.

    “Maybe two hours, depends on Staraptor!”

    “Oh…….What exactly did you do as a prank, anyway?”

    Stan burst into laughter and wiped a happy tear from his eye.

    “We put some Trainees into a net and flew ‘em around the island!”

    Looker couldn’t help but chuckle at imagining the scene.

    The two flew on, flying over Mt. Coronet and nearing Jubilife City, the center of media-life in Sinnoh. Tall buildings cut through the air, and a big domed-roofed building, sporting the orange PokeInternational logo stood to the west of the large town. They were running out of Sinnoh, about to soar above the ocean.


    The sun reflected down upon the blue ocean, casting tiny mirrors of light float on the small waves. Pelliper and Wingulls flew high in the sky and dipped towards the water, scooping up meals in their yellow beaks. A few wispy clouds high in the air lazily drifted by, not caring about a thing in the world.

    The tiny island, big enough only for a mansion and small beach, stood in the sea far North of Ever Grand City, Far enough away not to be bothered, but still close enough to the warm, tropical climate Hoenn is known for.

    Inside the large estate, a suave looking man with black hair, green eyes, and a content smug sat in a large living room, watching a news report on the flat screen TV.

    The scene was of a museum, bordered by yellow police tape as men and woman in local police uniforms scrambled about.

    “Late yesterday afternoon, “ The female correspondent began “A group of thieves wearing grey uniforms burst into the building, destroyed the main show room, and stole a rare item, the Platinum Meowth Coin….”

    The lady gulped before continuing.

    “All before killing the manager and curator.”

    The camera cut to a scene of a body bag being hauled away, then a gruesome scene of an office, blood splatter on the wall and red-stained carpet.

    “It is still unknown where the group came from or where they went. Moe information should be made available later today. This is Channel 8 news, ba-”

    The TV screen went black. Vick Hayden rose from the sofa, ran a hand through his slick hair, and cursed under his breath. Rex had brought too much attention to themselves.

    He walked to the large viewing window and pulled up a chair, wanting to admire the pristine day, but before he completely sat, something caught his eye. A shimmering, a gleam, came into view high in the sky. One, single, reflective sparkle soon became twenty as the shimmers shaped into Skarmory, men riding atop of them.

    He quickly walked, slipped on a pair of loafers, and walked outside to the concrete semi-circle in front of the mansion.

    Team Spade, as they were called, landed onto the ground and recalled the Pokemon and removed their goggles. The Team Spade “Commander”, a sickly, skinny man with greasy hair and beady eyes approached Vick, a stride in his step.

    “Rex, is the Coin ok? It isn’t damaged?”

    Rex scoffed, which almost sounded like a cough, and revealed the illuminating treasure from a belt pouch.

    “Fine as Poliwag hair.”

    “Good, give it here-”

    Vick held out his hand, awaiting his prize, but Rex pulled it closer to himself.

    “Not so fast, Vick.”

    The Spade Commander placed his hand behind his back and looked back at the Spade Grunts.

    “Now, we got your little toy, but we wanna know what’s going to happed to us now? Do we get a base? Funding? More Pokemon? This wasn’t just some errand or favor between old pals. We just don’t want clean records- We want more.”

    Rex smirked, his ego beamed. He had went from a lowly crook to a prideful punk.

    Vick chuckled as he shook his head.

    “Oh Rex, I paid your way out of rotting in a cell, basically cleaned your records, gave you Pokemon, gear, and yet you still want more…..”

    The dapper man stepped closer.

    “But, you see, I can reverse all of that with a snap of my fingers. I can send you and your scum back to rot, take away your Skarmory, and make you the same scum you were……”

    Another step closer. Rex didn’t budge, but slowly he began to shake.

    “I never did like dealing with filth, especially cocky, disrespectful filth such as you, but I had no choice. You’re rude, Rex. I can’t tolerate rudeness. Just hand me the Coin, and you can leave here with the Skarmory and uniforms. That, my friend, is a favor.”

    Again, Vick outstretched his hand, expecting the treasure.

    “N-no. We want more. Give us money, we risked our necks to get this.”

    “Hardly. You went to a small town, smashed a few cases, and flew to here.”

    Rex was beginning to sweat.

    “And I had to kill a guy!” he exploded, vein popping out of his scrawny neck.

    Vick clapped.

    “Ah yes, about that. That wasn’t necessary. You killed him just to look tough. You drew too much attention. That wasn’t part of the plan.”

    Another step, this time face to face with the other.

    “Now, I said I would let you leave here as a favor, but, like you said, what you did wasn’t a favor, right? So why should do you a favor?”

    Before anyone could react, Vick let out a high pitched whistle, and as soon as it exited his mouth, a pillar of water shot up to the right, startling Team Spade.

    The grey uniformed men turned to see what had burst through the water. Eyes widened, jaws dropped, and knees buckled at the sight of the large, atrocious looking beast. A Gyarados.

    “Gyarados, waste them all.”

    Some member of Team Spade tried to release their Skarmory to escape, but the fierce Water-Flying Type seemed to glide across the land, mighty tail toppling men, until a fleeing person was caught in its mouth.

    “Team Spade, retreat!!!!”

    Some men managed to get onto a back of a Skarmory, but as they took off, a blue, fiery beam shot from Gyarados’s mouth, hitting the smaller Pokemon, and almost roasting them and the men upon them.

    Some others tried to fight the raging beast with the Skarmory, but were soon chomped by it’s mighty teeth and thrown into the ocean, lifeless. Blood mixed with water.

    Vick stood back and admired the massacre. This was much better than just gazing at the ocean.
    “This shit-” Tom began.

    “-Is getting way too crazy!” Tim finished.

    The Spade twins ran side by side, narrowly dodging a Dragon Rage attack, and hopped into the water. Once they swam off a little bit, they released the Skarmory, clutched to the steel legs, and flew away.

    Gyarados continued to slaughter the men, Rex trying to stay alive, Coin still clutched in his hand. Bob, the grunt with large muscles and dark skin somehow managed to grab the powerful Pokemon around it’s serpentine neck and was holding on for dear life. Rod, was doing cartwheels amongst the frightened, scrambling men, laughing like a maniac. Mel had released his Mightyena and was doing the most damage to Gyarados. The canine looking Pokemon shot several Shadow Balls at the face of the blue Pokemon, then let out a foggy, black powder, which soon became a large screen of dense smoke. Smokescreen. Lou, another Grunt took the chance to release his ticket to living and Fly off, trying to alert the remaining few survivors. Rex dashed from the smoke, coughed, and reached for his Pokeball.

    Vick simply smiled and said “Gyarados, make sure not to let that one get away.”

    Gyarados suddenly sprung above the Smokescreen, Glared at the man, and leaned right towards him, fangs bared.

    Before the mighty beast could reach him, Mel’s Mightyena leapt through the air and used a Bite attack right on Gyarados’s neck, throwing it off course. Mel quickly withdrew his Pokemon. The enraged Pokemon raised back up to the sight of Rex and Mel running away, Rex flailing his arms in terror.

    In pure hate another Dragon Rage attack spilled from deep inside Gyarados, shot towards Rex, and connected with his arm, from his shoulder to about his forearm, toasting it. Raw chunks of flesh burned and smoldered.


    The sheer pain caused him to drop the Platinum Meowth Coin, letting it fall to the ground.

    Now clutching his injured arm, he released his Skarmory, as did Mel, Bob, and Rod, and flew off as fast as they could. Only them, along with the twins, had survived. Six out of twenty.

    Vick, no overly concerned with the ones that escaped, whistled again, signaling that Gyarados could slip back into the water. He knew most of them would be too terrified to come back and confront him or tell anyone of the incident in fear of going back to jail.

    He walked, scooped up the Meowth Coin, dusted it, and admired it’s beauty.

    “Success. Time to have a little…..’Auction’ with some friends…..”


    There we are folks, Chapter 19.

    As always, please feel free to write a comment or two, they are always read, and they really do help.

    I really like this chapter, and I hope you did as well. I feel like I’m getting back into the swing of things.

    Thank you all for reading, and tips or criticism always welcome!

    P.S.- So far, my favorite member(s) of Team Spade are Tom and Tim. Yours?

  14. #104
    Brock's Pikachu LightningTopaz's Avatar Moderator
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 19 up now! Comments welcome!)

    I'm wondering what that picture Looker found was of
    My URPG stats: Maya's status

    SuBuWriMo status: 28,103 words in all!

  15. #105
    Trainer Tobias's Avatar
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    Default Re: "Look" ( Chapter 19 up now! Comments welcome!)

    i'm really enjoying the direction the story is going, it was so innocent, and then looker, and his story, matured. probably one of my favourite fics:)
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