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  1. #106
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Thanks for the feedback. I don't enjoy straying too far from things, as I enjoy trying to stay true-ish to the games with this series. But (and trust me, I haven't just thought of this based on your comments) in the next story, Kris faces a different opponent who introduces combination attacks to her, if that is what you were implying. If you had some other idea, I wouldn't mind hearing it :)

    ^^^^ The GalacticVerse Bibliography (Thanks to Blazaking for Banner) ^^^^

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    Rocking the Lucario Thundagere's Avatar
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Quote Originally Posted by AceTrainer14 View Post
    Thanks for the feedback. I don't enjoy straying too far from things, as I enjoy trying to stay true-ish to the games with this series. But (and trust me, I haven't just thought of this based on your comments) in the next story, Kris faces a different opponent who introduces combination attacks to her, if that is what you were implying. If you had some other idea, I wouldn't mind hearing it :)
    Got it in one! I can't help wondering who this could be? And I have to wonder what Gold's next Pokemon will be. When's the next chapter?

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  3. #108
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    I'm not going to spoil anything, about either the new Pokemon or the new character. But if you look at what Gold said shortly after he arrived, you can work out what type the Pokemon will be ;)
    And hopefully soon: it is the last part of this chapter, so expect a dramatic battle

    ^^^^ The GalacticVerse Bibliography (Thanks to Blazaking for Banner) ^^^^

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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Oh, the wonders of Dex Holders! *plays creepy music*

    That and Hanoko coming around with Kris and being a cranky lady with a stick. Very nice. Gold should be very worried!

    I'm glad that you're giving a bit of variety to your battles - this "one on one" battle thingy is pretty neat. And Steven appearing was pretty cool. I always imagined them to be related in some way - I mean, they're both steel-users and they're actually quite similar if you think about it.

    I mentioned the battle, but I have to add that you're really trying hard with these battles! They're very well done and I love Gold's little comments - he kind of reminds me of Alfie sometimes!

    I can't wait to find out what this next Pokémon is - and, of course, who wins the battle!

    Wait a minute, he flew into the lighthouse... Hmm...
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  5. #110
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Creepy music, where? :O

    I'm glad everyone is liking Hanoko! :D *cough*BestSupportingCharacteratnextfanficawards*cough* Who said that ...

    And I'm glad you like Steven as well :D I don't really want him and Jasmine to be related, as I think it would be stereotypical. I think they are just good friends, like he knew her father or something

    I'm glad you think Gold is like Alfie :P Which reminds me, you inspired me to put Eusine into the next story

    You'll soon find out who the next Pokemon is, I just started writing the enw part

    ^^^^ The GalacticVerse Bibliography (Thanks to Blazaking for Banner) ^^^^

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    Rocking the Lucario Thundagere's Avatar
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Quote Originally Posted by AceTrainer14 View Post
    Creepy music, where? :O

    I'm glad everyone is liking Hanoko! :D *cough*BestSupportingCharacteratnextfanficawards*cough* Who said that ...

    And I'm glad you like Steven as well :D I don't really want him and Jasmine to be related, as I think it would be stereotypical. I think they are just good friends, like he knew her father or something

    I'm glad you think Gold is like Alfie :P Which reminds me, you inspired me to put Eusine into the next story

    You'll soon find out who the next Pokemon is, I just started writing the enw part
    Actually, I think I already know. Hmmm,

    Made by Blue Dragon!

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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    It's a Pomemon that doesnt evolve at all

    ^^^^ The GalacticVerse Bibliography (Thanks to Blazaking for Banner) ^^^^

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    At last, Kalos ghaskan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    It would be interesting if



    Lookin' good. I may give a little bit of review once this story is done. The story, not the entire fic, FYI. xD

  9. #114
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Ohh! Ohh!!! Ohhh!!!!
    Farfetch'd!
    Probably Aerodactyl, in hindsight.

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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    As I said above, Steven and Jasmine won't be related as it is too cliche/stereotypical

    EDIT: And Aerdocytal isn't a Johto Pokemon

    ^^^^ The GalacticVerse Bibliography (Thanks to Blazaking for Banner) ^^^^

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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Quote Originally Posted by AceTrainer14 View Post
    As I said above, Steven and Jasmine won't be related as it is too cliche/stereotypical

    EDIT: And Aerdocytal isn't a Johto Pokemon
    Oops, mean to spoiler that.

    I really have no clue. Enough with hyping the tension! I can't wait!

    Made by Blue Dragon!

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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    I decided to split the last scene in two, in order to quench your speculation about who Gold has :P


    The Great Ball hit the floor, and with blue light came the standard white energy. Instead of forming on the ground, the energy stayed in the air once it rose up, and began forming together. Small silver wings formed, with red bits attached, and they connected to a clunky metal body. On the end of a long, sectioned neck sat a long, pointed head, with a malicious smile, and the look was completed by metallic legs at the bottom and jagged tail.

    “SKAR-MORRRR-RY!” The Armor Bird squawked, and began flying around Gold’s head. Kris and Bayleef exchanged looks and came to the same conclusion: it was definitely the most metallic, loud, screechy and hideous thing they had ever come across.

    “A Skarmory, nice choice!” Jasmine complimented, and Gold beamed.

    “SKAAAAARRRR!” Skarmory cried, and Hanoko raised her stick angrily at Gold.

    “Ok Skarmory, you can calm down now! Let’s just focus on crushing her!” Gold said quickly, and pointed at Gold. Skarmory squawked, and began flying with a creak over the field. Kris was momentarily distracted by it’s hideous looks, but then held up her PokeBall.

    “I figured you’d have a flying type, after what you said about flying here earlier, so I have the perfect Pokemon!” Kris smiled. “Ok then Flaafy, out you come!” She called, and threw the ball into the battle. A few moments later, Flaafy formed on the field, with her cloud-like white hair and candyfloss coloured coat.

    “Flaaaaffffy!” She cried, and looked up at the strange looking Skarmory.

    “Electric vs Flying: a classic battle!” Steven said in a reminiscing fashion. “Let the final round begin!”

    “Skarmory, begin this with Steel Wing!” Gold yelled.

    “Alright then Flaafy, you use Fire Punch!” Kris commanded.

    “SKARMORRRRRYYY!” Skarmory screeched, and her two wings glowed a blinding silver. She dived down, looking like a harpoon that was about to impale Flaafy. The electric sheep bent her legs, ready to move at a moment’s notice. Her right fist became engulfed in fire, and Kris smiled, knowing this would be a quick battle.

    “SKAR!” Skarmory yelled, and turned sideways. Her left wing cut across Flaafy’s chest, causing her to stumble sideways.

    “Fire Punch, quickly!” Kris cried. Flaafy nodded, and managed to jump, punching Skarmory in the back before she flew off. However, Skarmory winced for a second, but didn’t look too badly damaged.

    “How… how come she isn’t in pain?” Kris asked, surprised.

    “Skarmory has a very high defence, Krystal.” Gold sneered, and Skarmory landed proudly along side him. Hanoko was twisting her walking stick angrily in her hands, and Kris felt a bit better as she stifled a laugh. But she had to keep this battle going, for the sake of her gym journey, the possible prize, and her for her own well
    being.

    “Bayleef Bay!” Bayleef shouited out in support, and Kris and Flaafy smiled.

    “Ready to continue?” Kris asked. “I hope the Steel Wing wasn’t too strong.”

    “Flaaafy Flaaaaf Feee.” Flaafy replied, and she stared determinedly at Skarmory.

    “Alright, go in with Air Cutter!” Gold shouted.

    “Thunderbolt, and blast that attack aside!” Kris yelled. Skarmory took up into the air again, and her wings glowed white. She began spinning around horizontally in the air, and sent out glowing white, crescent shaped shapes. They summoned up wind as they travelled towards Flaafy, creating a gust.

    “FLAAAAF!” Flaafy shouted, and she glowed yellow as she fired a powerful Thunderbolt. The Air Cutters were blasted to dust, and the yellow attack went threw and hit Skarmory in the neck.

    “MOOORRRYY!” She wailed, and spun backwards. A sharp feature on her head cut through the ceiling, covering dust and bits of plaster over Gold’s head, before Skarmory landed with a clang behind him.

    “Good job!” Kris said excitedly, and gave Flaafy a hug. The clang echoed inside the space, and there was a grunt from the direction of Jasmine. They all looked around, and saw Amphy was stirring.

    “Maybe we could make things a bit quieter…” Steven suggested, as Glaceon and Leafeon began stretching themselves as they woke behind him.

    “I can’t promise anything!” Gold snarled. “Skarmory, fly in with Brave Bird!”

    “That’s going to cause damage to you as well you know!” Kris pointed out.

    “Oh well, whatever it takes to defeat you!” Gold snapped back, and Kris’ eyes narrowed.

    “SKAAAR!” Skarmory shouted, and she took off again. She had only risen a few feet into the air when there was a light purple flash, nearly blinding everyone. Once they could see again, Skarmory appeared to be covered in light purple flames. Flaafy’s jaw dropped, and she suddenly looked rather nervous. Skarmory smiled, and tucked in her wings and dived down. Kris wasn’t sure what to do, but then she saw how low Skarmory would have to fly.

    “Jump up and Body Slam!” Kris yelled. Flaafy nodded, and she leapt up as Skarmory approached.

    “Aaaaafy!” The Wool Pokemon cried, and tried to make herself look bigger.

    “SWERVE!” Gold shouted. Kris gasped, and watched as Skarmory turned, pulling out of the dive. Flaafy screeched as she fell through the air, and landed painfully onto the tiles.

    “Now, complete the attack!” Gold instructed. Skarmory did a loop-de-loop, and went back on course towards Flaafy. The electric sheep was in pain from landing, and coulnd’t move in time. Skarmory hit her, and Flaafy wailed as they smashed through the tiles, breaking them into pieces. They came to a stop once they hit a thin wall section between two windows, and Skarmory collapsed onto a groaning Flaafy due to the recoil. A pile of broken tiles and dust was around the two, and they both looked very sore.

    “Air Cutter while your close!” Gold bellowed, as he tactlessly ignored the emotions of the Pokemon. Skarmory’s neck creaked like an aging steam engine as she tried to get up, and as she began to flap her wings, Kris was reminded of a scene in a movie where a suspension bridge had snapped. She felt bad for the hideous bird, but knew that she’d never win if she felt bad for Gold’s Pokemon.

    “Fire Punch before she gets away!” Kris shouted. Flaafy looked up, and suddenly jumped up, much to everyone’s surprise.

    “I didn’t think a flying type move could have done much damage to her!” Hanoko shouted in jubilee.

    “Flaaaf!” Flaafy chuckled, and punched Skarmory in the stomach with her fiery fist. Skarmory squawked and turned upside down, so her head faced the roof. But, she still began spinning, and suddenly multiple numbers of the glowing crescents blasted Flaafy backwards into the pile of tiles.

    “Phar.. Ampha…. Oos…” Everyone’s heads turned again, and they watched as Amphy suddenly sat up, rubbing her head and looking exhausted.

    “Oh Amphy darling, are you alright?” Jasmine asked, and moved closer to her.

    “Pharos Ampharos.” The Ampharos replied. She looked at the scene, and saw Skarmory fluttering lazily over the others, and then the Flaafy, slumped up in a pile of rubble.

    “Amph!” Amphy gasped, and pointed at Flaafy. The Wool Pokemon moaned, and slowly got up. She was staring unhappily at Skarmory: this metal bird was giving her a lot of grief, and Flaafy wasn’t enjoying getting beaten up something it should be strong against. Kris could see the hurt in her eyes, and just wanted to run onto the field and hug her, but knew it wasn’t allowed.

    “Both Pokemon are still able to fight, so I think we should continue this, yes?” Steven suggested.

    “Of course, we need to end this!” Gold boomed.

    “Skar!” Skarmory cried, though not quite as loudly as before.

    “That’s the spirit! Now use Steel Wing!”

    “We need your next Thunderbolt to be powerful, so use Charge!” Kris called to Flaafy. Flaafy nodded, and she faintly glowed yellow. Electricity flowed around her body, and she looked tougher, angrier, more ready to fight. Skarmory scoffed, and she flew towards her with her glowing silver wings.

    “Ampharos Amph!” Amphy was shouting, and she suddenly pushed past Jasmine, shocking everyone. Flaafy turned and looked at her evolved form, who was now standing behind Gold. The two looked at each other, their eyes seemingly fixed. Gold went to say something, but Hanoko whacked him, and Gold silently moaned. Neither Pokemon said anything, but Flaafy nodded. She now looked back at Skarmory, having gained some new found determination from her older counterpart.

    “MOOORRRRYYY!” Skarmory interrupted the silence, as she got closer to Flaafy. Amphy smiled, and Flaafy got down on her stomach. Skarmory flew over and hit the window, causing it to crack and making a metallic echo.

    “Brilliant!” Kris cried, and Flaafy and Amphy smiled. Gold’s eyes narrowed, and he clenched his fists. “Now Flaafy, put all of your power and energy into this attack and use Thunderbolt!” Amphy cheered, and Bayleef and Hanaoko tensed up. Gold just raised an eyebrow and smiled, making Kris’ heart drop: this can’t be good.

    “Spikes!” Kris, Bayleef, Hanoko, Jasmine and Steven all gasped, and Amphy put her hands over her mouth. Flaafy had already glowed a blinding yellow, just as Skarmory began spinning like a top, and small brown spikes formed.

    “FLAAAAAAAA,” Flaafy began. “FFFFFFYYYYY!” And she fired a powerful bolt of electricity.

    “Spikes is ground, and that’s immune to electricity, so-” Steven began, but Hanoko cut in.

    “DUCK!” She bellowed. Everyone jumped as the Thunderbolt hit the Spikes.

    The result was catastrophic.

    The small Spikes act liked mirrors: as the Thunderbolt hit, the arrow-head shaped objects deflected the attack. All of Flaafy’s electric energy had gone into the attack, and it was showing. The bolts became reflected as they hit each Spike, and soon a web of electricity had formed.

    But the bolts had to hit something.

    Nearly every single window in the vicinity got hit: the cracking of the huge panes of glass smashing simultaneously echoed in the room. Amphy dived onto Jasmine, Bayleef ran towards Kris, Glaceon and Leafeon sped towards Hanoko, and there was a flash of light as Steven threw a PokeBall. Huge shards of glass flew across the room, followed by miniature explosions as the lift control pad and the light bulbs all exploded as well. The door into the staircase was blasted off it’s hinges, and Kris and Jasmine both screamed, and Flaafy screamed out in pain.

    Than, almost as suddenly, the electricity stopped.

    Everyone waited a few moments, waiting as a few more shards of glass fell onto the floor. There was a loud thud, and the sound of footsteps running up the stairs. Kris opened an eye nervously, and saw a drop of blood in front of her. She felt her face, and found a tiny spot where some glass had nicked above her eyebrow.

    “Everyone alright?” Steven called.

    “Yes!” Three other people replied.

    “I’m fine, but I’ve got a small cut.” Kris replied.

    “Bayleef Leef!” Kris looked up, and found that Bayleef was standing over her, shaking glass out of her leaf. The preteen smiled and hugged Bayleef as she stood up.

    “Thanks for protecting me!”

    “Leef Bay!” Bayleef replied, and nuzzled her shoulder. But Bayleef suddenly stopped, her eyes wide in shock. Kris was surprised, and she turned around as well.

    There, lying on the ground, was Flaafy. The power of her own attack had drained all of her energy, and now the pink sheep was lying on the glass strewn floor, with wisps of smoke rising out of her.
    Ignoring the glass on the ground, Kris collapsed onto her knees, her jaw open in shock, and an empty sensation in her stomach. Skarmory was still standing, though more smoke was rising from her, and she
    was panting a lot.

    But she was still standing.

    Once again, Kris had lost to Gold.


    Look out for the final part tomorrow, with an unexpected twist and TWO Hoenn Pokemon!

    ^^^^ The GalacticVerse Bibliography (Thanks to Blazaking for Banner) ^^^^

  13. #118
    At last, Kalos ghaskan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    Quote Originally Posted by AceTrainer14 View Post
    As I said above, Steven and Jasmine won't be related as it is too cliche/stereotypical
    Steven needs to be related to someone. And you need an I'm your (grand)father moment I kid, I kid. Time to read the new part!

  14. #119
    Moderator AceTrainer14's Avatar Forum Head
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    I'll make people be related to who I want to be, it is my story after all :P

    ^^^^ The GalacticVerse Bibliography (Thanks to Blazaking for Banner) ^^^^

  15. #120
    Rocking the Lucario Thundagere's Avatar
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    Default Re: Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War

    YES!!! Gold for the win!
    By the way, it's not that bad an idea to make your character almost always lose to the rival, look at Rival's Story. It can build character development. May I suggest writing one chapter from Gold's point of view? I don't want to take too much from Rival's Story, but it seems to be that Skarmory's development would be an awesome thing to see. DOn't make Gold TOO callous towards his pokemon though; we don't need another Silver:)
    Overall, GREAT JOB!!!

    Made by Blue Dragon!

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