.:: HOENN MEMORIES ::. Win Event Pokemon by participating on the Hoenn Trivia
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Thread: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::. Win Event Pokemon by participating on the Hoenn Trivia

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    Azu Trainer RE-Hiro's Avatar
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    Default .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::. Win Event Pokemon by participating on the Hoenn Trivia

    More Information about the Event Pokemon Prizes at the end of Chapter 1
    ______________________________________




    ______________________________________


    This is the story about Hiro and Sakura, a pair of twins that started their journey on the Hoenn region in the hope of becoming Trainer and Coordinator respectively. Along with their beloved Azulmarill and Azu they met so many people while they were traveling. One of them was Jack who joins them on their adventure; he is a Pokemon breeder from Jhoto who loves Pokemon so much, even more that he likes humans.
    They all learned many things about Pokemon, friendship, strength, courage, kindness and even love.

    ______________________________________


    Index:

    Chapter 1 - Dawn of a new journey

    Chapter 2 - A new friend

    Chapter 3 - Getting started

    Chapter 4 - All things shine and beautiful

    Chapter 5 - Off-balanced

    Chapter 6 - Don't be afraid

    Chapter 7 - A stone's throw

    ______________________________________

    Main Characters:




    Pokemon:










    Recurring Characters:














    ______________________________________

    Chapter 1
    Dawn of a new journey




    It was a beautiful morning at Verdanturf town. The wind was blowing as always, and it was thanks to it that all of the ashes coming from Mt. Chimney’s crater were washed away, instead the breeze brought with it the fragrance from all the blooming flowers that surrounded the area.
    Up in the sky, were the Taillows take wing, the sun was shining bright; illuminating all the little houses in the town and telling everybody a new day has started. Pokémon and humans alike were all waking up, getting themselves ready for their daily activities.
    Right in the middle of the town, in an ordinary house, a pair of twins was sleeping, dreaming with all the Pokémon waiting for them to meet. They already turned 10, so it was time for them to start their journey and become Pokémon trainers.
    Inside that house in a bedroom, the boy, Hiroshi, was dreaming with a battle, and how his Azurill named Azulmarill was wining, getting them one step closer to become champions. In the bed next to his, the girl, Sakura, was dreaming that her shiny Azurill called Azu; used a perfect combination in a Pokémon contest, and soon she would be the greatest coordinator ever.
    The sunlight quickly came through the window and woke Hiro up; he stretched and turned around. He saw his sister and her Azurill were still sleeping. Hiro's Azurill was waking up.

    “Good morning Azulmarill” Hiro hugged him “Are you excited?? Today is the big day!!”

    “Zurill zu” Azulmarill answered while he and his trainer were getting out of the bed.

    “I can’t wait!” Hiro try to whisper but he couldn’t help his excitement “I wanna get my starter pokemon right now!”

    “Good Morning Hiro, good morning Azulmarill” Sakura stretched.

    “Sorry sis. Did I wake you?” The boy asked

    “Well, not really” she answered and get out of bed. the movement woke up the green Azurill “Sorry I awake you Azu.”

    “Zuzuzu” Azu said a little drowsy, but immediately jumped to the arms of her trainer.

    “It seems we are all eager to begin our journey” He smiled.

    “I can't believe is time. I’m a little nervous bro.”

    “Don’t worry; as long as we are together everything would be ok” Hiro said while both made up their beds.

    “We should get ready now” Sakura suggested. Her brother nodded.

    The twin got dressed; they knew they need everything they could take with them so they took some comfortable clothes, a small tent, some blankets, a couple of pillows and put them on their bag packs. Hiro and Sakura also took all of their savings just in case they needed to buy something. They look around just to make sure they wouldn’t need anything else.
    They walked to the bathroom and washed their teeth and then took their toothbrush into his bag. The girl brushed her cherry blossom-colored hair while the boy tried to get his cyan hair straight.
    They watched into the mirror to verify they were all set. The twins, along with their Pokémon, went to the kitchen where mom was making breakfast.
    Because Verdanturf is a small town, everyone knew Mrs. Tsukishiro and her famous cooking. They also adore Hiro and Sakura because they were so nice with everyone. That’s why they would miss them so much.
    Their mom even threw a “Bon Voyage” party. Almost everyone in town assisted. They also brought some presents like berries, and other useful items for their journey like the bag pack the siblings were bringing with them.
    Hiro and Sakura sat at the table, where pancakes and juice were waiting for be eaten. There were also two plates with Pokémon food.



    “It smells delicious“Hiro sniffed.

    “Thanks mom, we are gonna miss you” everyone started to eat.

    “I’m so proud of you! I can’t believe you’re already ten” their mom shed a tear.

    “Don’t be sad mom, we are gonna take good care of ourselves” Hiro smiled.

    “We also have Azu and Azulmarill. We are gonna be just fine” Sakura add.

    “I have something for you that should be very helpful” mom walked into her room and brought two devices. She gave the pink one to the girl and the blue one for the boy.

    “What is this?” Sakura asked holding her gadget.

    “Is a Pokenav, sis” Hiro was pretty happy, he immediately open it and start using it “It has a map of Hoenn, Pokémon condition checker, Trainer’s eye and Match call”

    “That’s right sweetie. It also has a GPS, so you will always know where you are and never get lost” Mrs. Tsukishiro sat on the table again.

    “Thanks mom” Sakura said.

    The little family finished their breakfast. Hiro and Sakura took their bag packs, some food and carried their azurills. Their mom walked with them until they were almost out of town. It was very difficult for her watch them leave, that’s why she tried to spend as many time as possible with them.



    The twins said goodbye to their mother and headed south to Littleroot town, where they would meet Professor Birch.
    He is considered an expert on Pokémon and he’s the responsible for distributing Pokedexes and giving their starter Pokémon to trainers that starts their journey on the Hoenn region.
    While they were traveling through the forest, the twins were thinking what Pokemon they would choose. They already saw a poster featuring the three starters.
    Sakura thought Mudkip seemed a good choice; a water pokemon should be especially beautiful at performing in a pokemon contest.
    Hiro imagined a Treecko battling and using all sorts of strong attacks, and then suddenly changed his mind. He thought maybe the fire attacks would be stronger.
    They both kept traveling changing their minds back and forth about what starter they would choose.
    Without noticing they reached Oldale town by noon. At this rate they would reach Littleroot town by tomorrow.
    Hiro and Sakura thought they could make a quick stop at the Pokémon Mart just to get a few things. Lucky for them the store was at the edge of the road so they wouldn’t have to travel all the way into town. The four of them rushed into the building.

    “Good afternoon” The girl attendant said. The twin just smiled and then headed to a shelf where different types of pokeballs were on display. Their Azurills follow them.



    “Wow!” Hiro said “I wanna buy some of them… but I don’t know which.”

    “They are made for various purposes” a boy attendant said “We have available regular Pokeballs” he pointed at them “the blue one is a Great Ball, and the black one is an Ultra Ball, each of them more effective than the last.”

    “So, it would be easier to catch Pokémon with an Ultra ball rather than a Pokeball?” Sakura asked.

    “Yes” the employee answered “That on the left, the one with gray and red is a Timer Ball. It works better if you’ve been battling a Pokémon for an extended period of time. The red with yellow and black patterns is a Repeat Ball; it is better on catching a species of Pokémon you caught before. ” He continued “A Net Ball is very useful if you happen to encounter a bug or water Pokémon.” He pointed the Teal-colored ball “Or if the Pokémon you found is low-leveled you should throw at it that Brown and Green ball. That’s called Nest Ball.” The Twins were fascinated. The attendant then picked a Poke ball that was Ultramarine, blue and white. “As you should know, Hoenn has a vast ocean and a lot of Pokémon who dwells in the depths. For those, a Dive Ball is very effective” the young men put the ball back. “And last but certainly not least, this is a Luxury Ball. It is very comfortable for Pokémon and makes them quickly grow friendly.” Hiro and Sakura were dazzled by that black Poke ball with golden designs on it.

    “Thanks” The twin boy said while he and his sister watched the tag prices. Immediately they calculated what they could buy. They both smiled like if they were thinking the same. “I think we are gonna…”

    “Buy two of each” Sakura continued.

    “Perfect” The employee said. He picked two of each and took them to the register. The twins and Azurills followed him. They paid them as the boy attendant went to help another costumer.

    “Because you bought so many Poke Balls, and you seem like nice kids, I’m gonna give you two Premier Balls as a gift” The cashier said and give each a silvered colored ball “These are as effective as a regular Poke ball but we only give them to special costumers”

    “Thank you” The twins said, smiled and put all the new things on a special pocket on their bag packs.

    They, Azulmarill and Azu got out of the store and continued their journey. They traveled deeper and deeper into the forest. The time flew away and by the evening they reached route 101. It was getting Dark so they decide to rest and have something to eat.
    Hiro extended a blanket on the grass and took some food out of his sack. Meanwhile, Sakura and the Polkadot Pokémon sited on the improvised picnic spot.

    “I’m happy we are together on this, bro.” They all picked a sandwich.

    “Me too” Hiro answered “I’m very excited, I wanna have my first Gym battle right now!!”

    “I understand completely, I can wait for enter my first Pokémon contest.”

    “I’m sure you’re Azu will make quite an impression; I mean, how often you see a green azurill?”

    “Thanks bro and I’m sure your Azulmarill is so strong that he will beat all the gyms in a blink.”

    “Azur zu” Hiro’s Azurill posed while Sakura’s laughed

    The Party continued eating while it got darker. The joy was suddenly interrupted by a strange sound. The twins immediately stand up and watch all around to try to know what was it.
    Sakura picked Azu and got a little closer to Hiro. On the other hand, Azulmarill took a step as if they were trying to protect them.
    From behind a tree, a pack of poochyenas came out. Telling by their groans and looks they weren’t happy.
    The twin stood still, while the bite Pokémon were getting closer and closer.



    “Are they friendly?” the girl asked.

    “I don’t think so”

    “What should we do now?” Sakura was really scared and hugged her Azu.

    “Don’t know” Hiro answered. One of the poochyenas took a step, getting it closer to the twins.

    “Do something!!” Sakura yelled.

    “Azulmarill use bubble” Hiro said and the Polkadot Pokémon started to attack the Poochyenas. He barely hurt them. Behind the pack of poochyenas, a Mightyena came out. It was furious, because they attack them. The twins knew they didn’t have a chance “ Sakura, run!”

    Hiro, Sakura and the Azurills started running; unfortunately, the poochyenas and mightyena started chasing them. They entered even deeper into the forest and don’t even paid attention to where they were going.
    While running they saw a cave but Hiro thought it wouldn’t be enough for losing the Pokémon, so he continued running. They passed a little river and a creek.
    They then turned left and continue running. Hiro fell into a gap. He crouched and hid; he heard the pack jumping the slit and soon all the barking was gone.
    He looked around to verify it was safe.

    “C’mon, they’re gone” He took his azurill out of the gap.

    “Azu azu” Azulmarill cried.

    “We were lucky to fell into that hole. Are you ok sakura?” He asked but no one answered. He looked around one more time and saw he and Azulmarill were all alone “Sakura!” He screamed but once again, nobody responded. Hiro was terribly scared, but for her sister not for him. He sat on the grass and stared at azurill.

    “Azur-a?” Azurill asked for Sakura. Hiro remembered the words of her mother: you will always know where you are and never get lost. He took his Pokenav out of the bagpack, for a second he thought of calling her mother, but he didn’t want to worry her. He called her sister instead. The gadget rang.

    “Please Sakura, answer” It rang once again and abruptly stopped. On the screen a message appeared: not available. Hiro was terrified, worry for Sakura’s safety.



    ______________________________________

    Win Event Pokemon participating on the Hoenn Trivia:

    Every weekend I'll be posting a new chapter and at the end of it I'll ask 3 simple question about the fanfic. To participate on the Hoenn Trivia you should follow these simple rules:

    -You must review the chapter and answer only one of the three question.
    -You can only participate on the latest Hoenn Memories Chapter Trivia.
    -The first three people who answers correctly will get the Event Pokemon.
    -The First Place will get 3 Event Pokemon, the Second 2 Event Pokemon & the Third Place will get 1 Event Pokemon.
    -The results will be announce as soon as possible.
    -The trades will be held on weekends only.
    -The winners have to PM me about which Pokemon they choose from the list as the prize.


    Event Pokemon Prizes:

    ¤ - Unlocks In-game Events
    * - Shiny Pokemon

    Japan
    Ageto Celebi
    Ana Pikachu
    Batoruyama Ho-oh
    Colosseum Pikachu
    E-Reader Mareep
    E-Reader Scizor
    E-Reader Togepi
    Festa Metang
    GW Pikachu
    Hadou Mew
    Hadou Regice
    Hadou Regirock
    Hadou Registeel
    Negaiboshi Jirachi
    Pokefesta Wobbuffet
    Pokemon Festival Pikachu
    Pokemon Jungle Celebi
    PokePark Cacnea
    PokePark Celebi
    PokePark Corphish
    PokePark Corsola
    PokePark Igglybuff
    PokePark Jirachi
    PokePark Meowth
    PokePark Mew
    PokePark Minun
    PokePark Pichu
    PokePark Plusle
    PokePark Psyduck
    PokePark Skitty*
    PokePark Spinda
    PokePark spoink
    PokePark Surskit
    PokePark Taillow
    PokePark Whismur
    PokePark Wynaut
    Ruby Zigzagoon *
    Sapphire Zigzagoon *
    Sapporo Pikachu
    Stamp Absol
    Stamp Pichu
    Tanabata Jirachi
    10th Deoxys
    7-Eleven Pikachu
    Akiyama Slaking
    Almia Darkrai
    Baba Flygon
    Birthday Charmander
    Birthday Chimchar
    Birthday Pikachu
    Concert Chatot
    Crown Entei ¤
    Crown Raikou ¤
    Crown Suicune ¤
    Daisuki Club Bidoof
    Daisuki Club Starly
    Eigakan Arceus ¤
    Eigakan Darkrai
    Eigakan Shaymin ¤
    Goon Scizor
    Gorugo Octillery
    GS 10th Anniversary Mew
    Hamamatu Octillery
    Kyoto Cross Media Expirience Pikachu
    McDonalds Pikachu
    Movie Celebi ¤
    NZ Jirachi ¤
    NZ Manaphy
    Oblivia Deoxys
    Oblivia Heatran
    Oblivia Shaymin ¤
    Osaka Meowth
    Pal City Lucario
    Pal City Manaphy
    Pal City Mew
    PokeFesta Electabuzz
    PokeFesta Magmortar
    Pokemon Center Eevee
    Pokemon Sunday Whiscash
    Poketopia Pikachu
    Red Metagross
    Satoshi (Ash’s) Pikachu
    Shokotan Tropius
    Shokotan Pichu ¤
    Strongest Dragonite
    Strongest Electivire
    Strongest Magmortar
    Strongest Salamence
    Tanabata Jirachi
    Tenimura Regigigas ¤
    WCS Eevee *
    World Hobby Fair Manaphy
    Yokohama Pikachu
    Yukina Meowth
    Pokemon Ranch Aerodactyl
    Pokemon Ranch Buneary
    Pokemon Ranch Combee
    Pokemon Ranch Croagunk
    Pokemon Ranch Eevee
    Pokemon Ranch Finneon
    Pokemon Ranch Lickitung
    Pokemon Ranch Mew
    Pokemon Ranch Miltank
    Pokemon Ranch Pachirisu
    Pokemon Ranch Phione
    Pokemon Ranch Pikachu
    Pokemon Ranch Ponyta
    Pokemon Ranch Shellos
    Pokemon Ranch Shroomish
    Pokemon Ranch Snover
    Pokemon Ranch Staravia
    Pokemon Ranch Tangela
    Pokemon Ranch Vulpix
    Pokemon Ranch Wailmer
    Pokemon Ranch Wynaut
    Pokemon Ranch Yanma


    USA/UK

    10th Anniversary Absol
    10th Anniversary Alakazam
    10th Anniversary Articuno
    10th Anniversary Blastoise
    10th Anniversary Blaziken
    10th Anniversary Bulbasaur
    10th Anniversary Celebi
    10th Anniversary Charizard
    10th Anniversary Dragonite
    10th Anniversary Entei
    10th Anniversary Espeon
    10th Anniversary Ho-oh
    10th Anniversary Latias
    10th Anniversary Latios
    10th Anniversary Lugia
    10th Anniversary Moltres
    10th Anniversary Pikachu
    10th Anniversary Raikou
    10th Anniversary Suicune
    10th Anniversary Thyplosion
    10th Anniversary Tyranitar
    10th Anniversary Umbreon
    10th Anniversary Zapdos
    Aura Mew
    Doel Deoxys
    Jeremy Ekans
    Jeremy Gengar
    Jeremy Growlithe
    Jeremy Machamp
    Jeremy Psyduck
    Jeremy Staryu
    Jeremy Tauros
    Jeremy Vulpix
    Mt. Battle Ho-oh
    Mystery Mew
    PCNY Absol
    PCNY Flygon
    PCNY Seviper
    PokeBox Pichu
    PokeBox Skitty
    PokeBox Swablu
    PokeBox Zigzagoon
    Pokemon Channel Jirachi
    Pokemon XD Articuno
    Pokemon XD Lugia
    Pokemon XD Moltres
    Pokemon XD Zapdos
    Rocks Metang
    Ruby Zigzagooon *
    Sapphire Zigzagoon *
    Space C Deoxys
    WishMaker Jirachi
    Alamos Darkrai
    Almia Darkrai
    E4ALL Manaphy
    EUSMR09 Regigigas ¤
    Gamestop Deoxys
    Gamestop Pichu ¤
    Gamestop Jirachi ¤
    JBHF Manaphy
    Kyle Riolu
    Michina Arceus ¤
    Movie11 Shaymin ¤
    NWS Manaphy
    Nzone Pikachu
    PKLATAM Jirachi
    Poketopia Electivire
    Poketopia Magmortar
    Poketopia Pikachu
    SPR2010 Pichu ¤
    TCGWC Pikachu
    TRU Arceus ¤
    TRU Dragonite
    TRU Manaphy
    TRU Regigigas ¤
    TRU Shaymin ¤
    VGC09 Milotic *
    VGC10 Eevee *
    World09 Weavile
    World Championship 2010 Crobat
    Pokemon Ranch Aerodactyl
    Pokemon Ranch Buneary
    Pokemon Ranch Combee
    Pokemon Ranch Croagunk
    Pokemon Ranch Eevee
    Pokemon Ranch Finneon
    Pokemon Ranch Lickitung
    Pokemon Ranch Mew
    Pokemon Ranch Miltank
    Pokemon Ranch Pachirisu
    Pokemon Ranch Phione
    Pokemon Ranch Pikachu
    Pokemon Ranch Ponyta
    Pokemon Ranch Shellos
    Pokemon Ranch Shroomish
    Pokemon Ranch Snover
    Pokemon Ranch Staravia
    Pokemon Ranch Tangela
    Pokemon Ranch Vulpix
    Pokemon Ranch Wailmer
    Pokemon Ranch Wynaut
    Pokemon Ranch Yanma

    Spanish
    10th Anniversary Articuno
    10th Anniversary Charizard
    10th Anniversary Entei
    10th Anniversary Ho-oh
    10th Anniversary Latias
    10th Anniversary Latios
    10th Anniversary Lugia
    10th Anniversary Pikachu
    10th Anniversary Raikou
    10th Anniversary Suicune
    Aura Mew
    PokeBox Pichu
    PokeBox Skitty
    PokeBox Swablu
    PokeBox Zigzagoon
    Pokemon Channel Jirachi
    Alamos Darkrai
    Almia Darkrai
    EUVER09 Regigigas ¤
    Kiko Riolu
    Michina Arceus ¤
    Pelicula11 Shaymin ¤
    Poketopia Electivire
    Poketopia Magmortar
    Poketopia Pikachu
    Pri2010 Pichu ¤
    Pokemon Ranch Phione
    Pokemon Ranch Mew
    Pokemon Ranch Aerodactyl
    Pokemon Ranch Buneary
    Pokemon Ranch Combee
    Pokemon Ranch Croagunk
    Pokemon Ranch Eevee
    Pokemon Ranch Finneon
    Pokemon Ranch Lickitung
    Pokemon Ranch Miltank
    Pokemon Ranch Pachirisu
    Pokemon Ranch Pikachu
    Pokemon Ranch Ponyta
    Pokemon Ranch Shellos
    Pokemon Ranch Shroomish
    Pokemon Ranch Snover
    Pokemon Ranch Staravia
    Pokemon Ranch Tangela
    Pokemon Ranch Vulpix
    Pokemon Ranch Wailmer
    Pokemon Ranch Wynaut
    Pokemon Ranch Yanma



    French
    10th Anniversary Articuno
    10th Anniversary Charizard
    10th Anniversary Entei
    10th Anniversary Ho-oh
    10th Anniversary Latias
    10th Anniversary Latios
    10th Anniversary Lugia
    10th Anniversary Pikachu
    10th Anniversary Raikou
    10th Anniversary Suicune
    Mt. Bata Ho-oh
    Pokemon Channel Jirachi
    PokeBox Pichu
    PokeBox Skitty
    PokeBox Swablu
    PokeBox Zigzagoon
    Michina Arceus ¤
    Alamos Darkrai
    Almia Darkrai
    EUETE09 Regigigas ¤
    Film11 Shaymin ¤
    Karel Riolu
    Poketopia Electivire
    Poketopia Magmortar
    Poketopia Pikachu
    Pri2010 Pichu ¤
    VGC09 Milotic *
    Pokemon Ranch Phione
    Pokemon Ranch Mew


    Italy

    10th Anniversary Articuno
    10th Anniversary Entei
    10th Anniversary Charizard
    10th Anniversary Ho-oh
    10th Anniversary Latias
    10th Anniversary Latios
    10th Anniversary Lugia
    10th Anniversary Pikachu
    10th Anniversary Raikou
    10th Anniversary Suicune
    Montel Ho-oh
    Pokemon Channel Jirachi
    Aura Mew
    PokeBox Pichu
    PokeBox Skitty
    PokeBox Swablu
    PokeBox Zigzagoon
    Alamos Darkrai
    Almia Darkrai
    Carlo Riolu
    ESTEU09 Regigigas ¤
    Film11 Shaymin ¤
    Michina Arceus ¤
    Poketopia Electivire
    Poketopia Magmortar
    Poketopia Pikachu
    Pri2010 Pichu ¤
    Pokemon Ranch Phione
    Pokemon Ranch Mew


    Germany
    10th Anniversary Articuno
    10th Anniversary Entei
    10th Anniversary Charizard
    10th Anniversary Ho-oh
    10th Anniversary Latias
    10th Anniversary Latios
    10th Anniversary Lugia
    10th Anniversary Pikachu
    10th Anniversary Raikou
    10th Anniversary Suicune
    Duellbe Ho-oh
    Pokemon Channel Jirachi
    Aura Mew
    PokeBox Pichu
    PokeBox Skitty
    PokeBox Swablu
    PokeBox Zigzagoon
    Alamos Darkrai
    Almia Darkrai
    EUSMR09 Regigigas ¤
    Film11 Shaymin ¤
    Fru2010 Pichu ¤
    Kyle Riolu
    Michina Arceus ¤
    Poketopia Electivire
    Poketopia Magmortar
    Poketopia Pikachu
    Pokemon Ranch Phione
    Pokemon Ranch Mew
    Last edited by RE-Hiro; 21st February 2011 at 10:47 PM.

  2. #2
    BF Author alster08's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    You seem to have a bit grammer issues like your dialouge should be in qutaisions and you have a little more room for discription. The idea is nice but you still have more room for improvment. Also its nice to see you again.

  3. #3
    追放されたバカ
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Es muy epico, mi amigo. One problemo, though. Where's the quotation marks?

  4. #4
    Azu Trainer RE-Hiro's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Sorry, is just that, in mexico we use (-) instead of (") for the diaalogues.

  5. #5
    追放されたバカ
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Meh. For some reason, quotations are easier to read.

    "One million dollars!" Dr. Evil said, a pinky held to his mouth.

    One million dollars! - Dr. Evil said, a pinky held to his mouth.

    Both sentences are the same thing, but the one with quotation marks denotes speech better than a hyphen.

  6. #6
    Rocking the Lucario Thundagere's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    The idea has merit, but like everyone else said, the quotations make it much easier to read. If I were you, I'd edit the first chapter and put in quotations.

    Made by Blue Dragon!

  7. #7
    Azu Trainer RE-Hiro's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Got it!!! I've already edit the first chapter!!!
    Last edited by RE-Hiro; 24th August 2010 at 07:39 AM.

  8. #8
    Rocking the Lucario Thundagere's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Alright, here goes.
    Here's the thing, you're alternating in tenses sometimes. It gets kind of confusing that way. However, for the actual story--
    You're doing well plot wise, but it seems a but rushed. Already, they've been attacked vy Poochyena and lost each other in the first chapter. Put a lot more description, and space out the chapters, and I'm sure this fic will go far!

    Made by Blue Dragon!

  9. #9
    Azu Trainer RE-Hiro's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    What do you mean with "you're alternating in tenses sometimes."? XD

    I thought it wasn't so rushed. I'll take your advice and space out a little more the chapters!! :)

  10. #10
    is obsessed with Noivern! Zekurom's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Quote Originally Posted by The_Noob View Post
    Meh. For some reason, quotations are easier to read.

    "One million dollars!" Dr. Evil said, a pinky held to his mouth.

    One million dollars! - Dr. Evil said, a pinky held to his mouth.

    Both sentences are the same thing, but the one with quotation marks denotes speech better than a hyphen.
    They do it even worse in French:

    - One million dollars! Dr. Evil said, a pinky held to his mouth.

    Is how they do dialogue in French. Not all speech, however. Some speech is still put into guillemets, but only speech that is not part of dialogue.

    Even then, they do open a block of dialogue with a left guillemet, like this:

    « Here's the plan, said Dr. Evil. We get the warlord, and we hold the world ransom for one million dollars!
    - Ahem...well, don't you think we should maybe ask for more than just a million dollars? asked his No.2. I mean, a million dollars really isn't much money these days.
    - Really? asked Dr. Evil.
    - Mm hmm, replied the No.2.
    - Okay then, declared Dr. Evil. We hold the world ransom for one hundred BILLION DOLLARS!!»

    In fact, that's a rule in my own dialogue - any dialogue that doesn't get its own quotes in French dialogue is single-spaced when I type it out.
    Last edited by Zekurom; 25th August 2010 at 01:38 PM.
    The word "quadragonal" is the only word with "dragon" in it where "dragon" is not a root word. That makes it awesome.

  11. #11
    Azu Trainer RE-Hiro's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Hey guys, i would also like to know what do you think of the pics??

  12. #12
    Rocking the Lucario Thundagere's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    The girl, Sakura, was dreaming that her Shiny azurill, Azu; used a perfect combination in a Pokémon contest, and how soon she will be the greatest coordinator ever.
    You use the future tense like it's being said in the present at the end but the past tense at the beginning. Little things like that, when all fixed, can greatly enhance the story!
    And I love the pictures! How did you make them, with TIlesets! They really give me a better idea of how it will play out. Just be careful not to spoil too much about the teams.

    Made by Blue Dragon!

  13. #13
    Azu Trainer RE-Hiro's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    They are teasers rather than spoilers. XD

  14. #14
    Azu Trainer RE-Hiro's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Chapter 2
    A new friend




    A poochyena pack passed right by a cave, running as fast as they can. As it was dark it was hard to spot them, but it was easy to hear them. A scared little girl waited until the barks sounded distant. She was breathing deeply, tired for trying escape from them. She stood up, hoping they were really far by now.



    “I think they are gone…” Sakura said holding tightly her shiny azurill “Are you ok Hiro?” She asked and looked around the cave. She saw nothing but rocks and a couple of Zubat hanging from the ceiling; she then let down her pokemon and ran out of the cave where they were hiding.

    Riru?! “Azu tried to call Hiro.

    “He’s not here” Sakura whispered, like her words weren’t able to come out. She looked around one more time, and all she saw were trees lighted by the moon. Everything was so quiet. She couldn’t believe it; they have never been apart since they were born. She fell on the ground terrified.

    “Azu Azu” the polka dot Pokémon tried to cheer her up.

    “I’m so scared Azu, I don’t know what to do” her pokemon got closer and rubbed itself on her lap. She imagined how worried her brother must be and that it wasn’t the time to give up. She tried to be brave and stood up “I guess we should look for Hiro and Azulmarill”

    Sakura and Azu started walking slowly. It was pretty dark so they weren’t sure which way to go. They both tried to listen to Hiro and Azulmarill’s voice, or anything else that would give them a clue of where they would be. Apart from the sound of the wind blowing, they couldn’t hear anything else. Then, they tried to follow the tracks of the poochyenas but they were very difficult to spot.
    She started walking despite not knowing where she was heading to. The little Azurill was following her closely. They passed a little creek where a bunch of lights were floating right above the clear image of the moon that was reflected on the water. It was pretty obvious they were pokemon dancing in the night. Sakura supposed they were Volbeat and Illumise, as she has already seen them. If she wasn’t be so scared she would stop and admire them. She continued walking getting deeper and deeper into the quiet forest.

    Suddenly, the silence was broken by the sound of a device ringing, smothered by clothes and other things. The girl was startled by the noise. She realized it was coming from her bag pack. A little smile appeared on her face. She knew it was her brother calling. Sakura opened her bag pack and quickly took out her Pokegear. She was so nervous that the gadget slipped through her fingers.

    Her heart almost stopped. The gadget rang once again and crashed on the ground. Sakura started shaking, watching how her only chance to contact her brother was gone. She kneeled and picked the pink Pokegear up. It was in one piece, but a clicking sound inside told her it was broken. She couldn’t help it and started crying.

    “Azuzu?” Azu asked if she was ok. Her little pokemon was crying too. In an effort to cheer it up Sakura whipped her tears and smiled, but the feeling couldn’t reach her eyes.

    “I’m ok Azu” she lied.

    “Azuu” the pokemon tried to smile back.

    “I think we should rest for now" She said and grab her bagpack, she then took the Pokegar in and a sleeping bag out. She walk to a big tree that was a few feet away. The girl extended the sleeping bag and opened the zipper. Sakura got into it. Azu cuddled right next to her.

    For more than an hour, both of them stayed awake; but because of how tired they were, Sakura and Azu couldn’t help it and fell asleep.

    Sakura dreamed with the poochyenas running after her and Hiro. The forest was pretty huge and they kept running but they couldn’t find an exit. Her brother then ran to a cliff and fell into the darkness.



    “Are you ok?” a voice said. Sakura opened her eyes, it was already daylight. She saw a young boy kneeled. He was wearing a green jacket, a green hat and a green bagpack. He was right around her age, probably one year older. The boy took his sunglasses out “Who’s Hiro?” Sakura stared at him “You were screaming Hiro” Sakura stretched and got out of her sleeping bag “My name is Jack. Are you really ok”

    “I’m fine thanks” she answered. Azu woke up. It seemed Jack was surprised by the strange coloration of the Pokémon.

    “This is your Azurill, right? She’s so cute” Jack petted her.

    “Yeah, her name is Azu” Sakura was surprised of how soon Jack knew the polkadot Pokémon was female. Usually she has to clarify the gender of her Pokémon to others.

    “Are you really ok?” Jack asked again “you have dirt on your clothes” The boy pointed that out “are you hurt”

    “No, I just got lost and separated from my brother Hiro”

    “Do you need help find him?” Jack stopped petting the polkadot Pokémon

    “That would be great” she and Azu smiled. The girl realized she didn’t introduce herself. “I’m Sakura” She said and took her sleeping bag and put it back.

    “How you got separate from your brother? “ Jack asked while they started walking.

    “A pack of poochyenas was chasing us. I hid on a cave but I guess my brother kept running” Sakura turned and saw Jack smiling like if something he heard was funny “Why you laugh?” Sakura asked a little mad.

    “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you, but I think the poochyenas are so cute. I can’t understand how you and your brother were scared” Sakura looked angry “I guess they were a bunch of them.”

    “Yeah they were. There was also a Mightyena” she added

    “Where were you going?” Jack asked

    “We are just starting our journey, we were heading to Littleroot town,”

    “I’m going there too” Jack said.

    “Are you going to get your pokemon?” for a moment she wondered what pokemon the boy would be picking for his starter.

    “No, I already have 6 pokemon with me. I’m going there to pick up my pokedex.”

    “You already have 6 pokemon?” Sakura was amazed. Azu smiled.

    “Yes, my mom and dad are Pokémon breeders back at home.” Jack answered “I’m starting a new journey on my own.”

    “Where are you from?” Sakura asked.

    “I’m from Ecruteak, Jhoto. I brought three pokemon with me and I’ve already caught three here” Jack smiled “I love pokemon so much, they are really cute!”

    “I can tell…” – Sakura said. Azu smiled at her coment.

    “Now tell me, where are you from?” Jack asked.

    “Me and my brother are from Verdanturf, a small town north from here” Sakura said, she looked a little sad.

    “Azuzu” she tried to cheer sakura.

    “Don’t worry, we’re gonna find your Brother” Jack smiled “He must be on his way to Littleroot town too”

    “I guess” She answered. She was really sad.

    “Do you have a way to contact him?” Jack asked trying to help her.

    “Well, I have a Pokenav… but it’s broken now.”

    “May I see it for a minute?” They stopped for a moment while she took out her Pokenav. She handed it to Jack; he opened and took out a little card with a chip.

    “This is the memory” the boy said “Here are all your contact numbers and data.”

    “So, can i buy another one and have all the same data?” Sakura smiled.

    “Well, yeah, but your Pokenav is not completely wrecked” Jack rolled up his left sleeve and revealed a green watch-like device. He took out from it a card like the one the Pokenav has. He put Sakura’s card into his widget and then dialed a number.

    “What is that?” Sakura asked. Jack’s gadget started ringing.

    “This is a Pokegear, basically, it has all the same features as your Pokenav” Jack said. Suddenly the ringing stopped. Hiro appeared on the screen.



    “Who are you? Is my sister ok?” The twin boy asked.

    “Yeah, she’s right here, I’m using my Pokegear because her Pokenav is broken” Sakura got a little closer so her brother could see her.

    “Hiro are you ok?” Sakura smiled. She was so happy.

    “Yes, I am ok. I’m glad you’re ok Sakura, you don’t know how worry I was” Hiro confessed.

    “I was really scared, but Jack found me.”

    “Thanks Jack for helping my sister” Hiro smiled.

    “No problem” Jack also smiled “Hey, according to the GPS you’re like 550 yards away. Just head southeast and we’ll meet.

    “Ok, I’m coming”

    “I’ll see you soon brother” The call ended. Sakura was really exicted “Thanks again Jack.”

    “Zu zu zu” Azurill was full of joy.

    “No problem” Jack returned the cards to their original places. “Now let’s go meet your brother.”

    The three headed northwest so they would meet halfway. While they were walking Sakura noticed how different from last night the forest looked. The trees were moving at the rhythm of the wind, and the leaves flew all around. The sunlight was strong but it was a warm day, not hot, it was because the summer was ending and the fall was coming soon. It was a beautiful view.
    Definitely, the forest was different. The girl even wondered if it was another route they took, but she then saw the little river that connected to the creek. At the edge there was a little blue Pokémon with leaves on it.



    “What Pokémon is that?” Sakura asked.

    “Just a moment” Jack said. He already new what it was, but he tried to show it to sakura. From his jacket took out a red gizmo.



    “Oddish. The weed Pokémon” a male robotic voice came from the gadget “This Pokémon is typically found roaming the forest, scattering pollen as it walks around”

    “That’s a Pokedex right?” Sakura asked. She then remember the boy said he was going to Littleroot town to get a pokedex “But… you said you’re getting one.”

    “Let me show you” Jack turned to his left. There was another Pokémon a few feet away, it was a small green Pokémon with yellow markings. The boy pointed his gadget to it.



    “Electrike. No more information available.”

    “This is a Jhoto Dex, it has no data about foreign Pokémon” Jack said and took the Pokedex back into his pocket. They continued walking.

    “Zuzu” The little green Azurill exclaimed.

    “It is pretty amazing, I can’t wait to have one” The girl said.

    From the distance, they spot Hiro and Azulmarill. Both Sakura and her Pokémon ran towards them. They hug and celebrated they were together again. Jack joined them immediately. The twins were jumping as the boy was smiling.
    Suddenly, something marvelous happened. While they were holding them, the Azurills’ bodies started to shine. The siblings were amazed.

    “What’s happening? Sakura said.

    “They are evolving” Jack answered but it seemed they didn’t hear him. The Pokémon stopped shinning. They were bigger than before.

    “Azulmarill? You evolved!!! You look awesome” Hiro said.

    “Riru!!!” The Pokémon answered.

    “And you look so adorable Azu” Sakura said, the green marill jumped and hug her.



    “Congratulations!!” Jack screamed. The twins were so excited that they forgot about him. Hiro and his evolved Pokémon walk to him “My name is Jack” he introduced himself, smiled and extended his hand.

    “I’m Hiro” They shook hands. He looked at him and smiled “Thank you so much for taking care of my sister.”

    “It was nothing” Jack was pretty happy for them. He let go Hiro’s hand.

    “I’m so glad we are together again” Sakura said and hugged his brother.

    “Me too” The boy answered “Now let’s go to Littleroot Town. Are you coming with us Jack”

    “Come on Jack, please come with us” The girl suggested.

    “Well…” Jack watched the aqua mouse Pókemon, he then saw Sakura and Hiro smiling “It would be nice if we stay together” The boy smiled back.

    “Alright! So what are we waiting? Let’s go!” Hiro said while the whole party headed south.
    Last edited by RE-Hiro; 30th September 2010 at 01:04 PM.

  15. #15
    BF Author alster08's Avatar
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    Default Re: .:: HOENN MEMORIES ::.

    Heres another lesson. When you are at the end of the dialouge qutations you put a comma inside of them if something follows.

    WRONG: "I was only trying to help!" cried Laura you burst into drowning tears.

    RIGHT: "I was only trying to help," cried Laura bursting into drowning tears.

    OR

    Wrong: "Nothing can stop me now,"

    Right: "Nothing can stop me now,"

    Ya you should follow thyese because once I wrote 18 Chapters on an abandoned Thread and finally then someone decided to tell me.

    Just trying to help out. Good LUck!

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