Pokemon Ranger: Shadows of Almia - Information Thread

Registeel · 11th November 2008, 02:11 PM

I've got my copy today and I know Hitomi's US name.

Hitomi is now called Kate.

~~Maxim Posthumus~~ · 11th November 2008, 02:26 PM

Originally Posted by Registeel

I've got my copy today and I know Hitomi's US name.

Hitomi is now called Kate.

Kate?

Oh no~~~~!

Anyway, thanks a lot for the information.

Here's the cookie!

To System Error: Please continue your Pokemon Ranger 2 impressions report. It's very nice to read.

System Error · 11th November 2008, 04:16 PM

Sure, I can do that.

Part 17: AND THAT'S WHAT LIGHTS MY FI-YA!

I lied. Not sleepy enough. I turned on the game again after not being able to sleep and found out something interesting - the status screen changes to either day or night (and probably more) depending on the time of day! The time of day based on the DS's clock, that is. I think it was that way in the original Ranger, too.

So after all that happened then, Vlad gets awoken to find there's a fire in Vien Forest. Lacking any sort of say, firefighters, he has to act in their stead in his position as a Ranger.

Barlow:
I just received word from Crawford, who
was out on a stroll.

So he was just strolling around when he suddenly noticed the fire? Didn't he notice all the smoke? And heat? And the flames?

Luana:
Someone burn some toast or something?
That smoky smell woke me up...

The stupidity of this question is only furthered by the fact that there is no toaster in the Ranger base.

Drew:
Um, I like Pokemon.
I'm two years old.
I'm three.
Um, bye-bye.

I can usually decipher things from broken or internet English, but god damn. I can't figure out what she's trying to say to save my life.

Mr. Woodward
The trees of the forest are screaming
in agony...

All right, I've heard of the theory of Gaia and all that crap. But this is ridiculous!

Little Tim:
I keep telling her it's not safe and we have
to go, but she's not hearing any of it...

Some man you are.

-Mission-
Fight the Vien Forest Fire!

Once I set foot in the forest, all the smoke becomes visible. For some reason, all of it is contained here, with none of it seeping out into town. No fire in sight yet...

Luana:
Oh my gosh, it's little Mimi from the house
next door to the Base!

Mimi seems fine to me. But she won't leave until she has all her Happiny! Now that's loyalty! Stupid and rash, but loyalty!

20. Cherubi
21. Shinx
22. Weedle
23. Happiny

Weedle had way more HP than it should have...still an easy catch. And apparantly, according to the game, the Happiny Mimi owns are all wild. The Miltank on the farm was called "The farm Miltank" or something to that extent, but it just says these are wild ones.

As I try to head south from there, a burning log dropped down, and four Budew attacked! I caught them all at once. :D

The Ditched Beach Boy:
I'm not a Ranger, so I can't get a Pokemon
to help me.

Beach Boy is now known as The Ditched Beach Boy, and is lamenting his loss of his girlfriend and being stuck in the woods. Now that's a deep subplot! Oh yeah, and he's helping fight the fire by throwing water from the stream on it, and somehow succeeding despite not having a bucket.

As I go deeper in, Luana gets hotter. In the heat sense, which is only understandable because there's fire everywhere deeper in the forest. And I see another destroyed nuke transmitter item!

24. Wartortle

The flames are too intense to go any farther, apparantly. Even though there are no more beyond there! I use Wartortle's Soak 2 to extinguish the burning log that dropped down earlier. This somehow makes the log vanish into thin air as well, avoiding the need to use a Tackle or Crush move to get rid of it.

I got the rest of the Happinys and sent Mimi on her merry way.

I tried my Munchlax' assist for the first time too. Didn't seem too helpful, and the concept and gain per loop seems nerfed since the original. But hey, fuckin' Munchlax man.

25. Beedrill

Damn, this was somewhat slightly annoying. It was fast. But I was faster!

Crawford:
I hate admiting this, but my Styler's
malfunctioning from this crazy heat.

Yeah. That's exactly the equipment a Ranger needs. The kind that goes haywire when you need it most.

I need to capture a Blastoise so it can use Rain Dance to put out a lot of fire at once. There's also a lot of those brain bomb machines around. All of which are destroyed.

26. Buizel
27. Roselia

And after nearly being fucking decapitated by the damn thing as it tried to rocket tackle me...

28. Blastoise

Holy shit, did it have a lot of HP, though. Its HP bar even showed it!

29. Grotle

So did this thing. I think it could've potentially tackled me too, but I got it from behind before it could do so.

And with one Rain Dance, everything is back to normal! On the way back though, I run into "Mysterious Guy", who runs off (into a dead end) before we have a chance to talk with him. Then he gets taken back to the Ranger Base for medical treatment and a good 'ol fashioned interogation.

30. Combee

And after the fire, the Combees came out to play.

Part 18: Side-Questing

Back in Chicole, I find a little girl who heard crying under the school bridge! She thinks it's a Pokemon, her friends think it's a ghost, and I think it's a troll.

So I go check it out, and a gang of kids comes up, led by Little Boy, who claims the cry is not of a Pokemon, but a ghost. Hey, there were those Gastlys, weren't there? They're close enough! But no! It's of a Floatzel! One that I don't even get to capture! The little girl makes friends because of it. I get Water Defense 3, though.

I return, and in true fashion, get promoted to Rank 2. Yay? Now I can use Fire and Fighting assists. Oh and Mysterious Guy? He's getting bound up tightly until he decides to talk. Personally, I'd attack the "weak point" for "massive damage" to get him to talk, but I guess this works too. And he has a new name: "Oil-reeking guy." And then it becomes "Oil-Stinker-Creep." Then "Ollie".

Barlow is such a dick.

Now I have to do more quests or some shit because I was told to patrol. For example, I help "Old Woman" get a glimpse of a Combee, which I happened to have with me at the time. Instant quest completion! She uses the honey to bake cookies for her granddaughter. I get Electric Defense 3 from it. I also help "Boy" solve his anger problem by smashing crates on the beach. I find a paper with this on it...

Giga---- ---Type 08--U
(PRO-OTY-E)

Bo-- c-lor: Re-
Ene-gy: F--e

...which means...god knows what.

The rest of the text is illegibly blurred by
seawater.

Like The Almia Times? OH SNAP! It just takes that one breaking of a box with a nearby Bidoof to save the beach! For it, I get Normal Defense.

For his helping save the forest, Beach Girl decided to get back together with The Ditched Beach Boy. Now "The Ditched" is the one who has been ditched, as he is simply known as "Beach Boy" again. I then help Mr. Woodward clear fallen logs in the forest by using Cut 2 with Roselia for the Long Line Power-Up. Finally, something useful! With that, that's all I find there really is to do at the moment, so I decided to call it quits for the day. In-game and in-real life.

On one final note, sometimes, the other Rangers call Barlow, "Leader", leading to awkward statements such as...

Elaine:
Leader told me to keep my hands off that
machine until Prof. Hastings sees it.

Part 19: I hate Escort Missions.

So Vlad takes a rest, and, apparantly, it's still the same day of the fire, as a "The next day..." screen didn't appear. My mission is to find Prof. Hastings and escort him through the forest so he can come to the Ranger Base and examine the machine. I hate escort missions, but on the bright side, at least this escort won't die. Nor will he require carrying on my back. Or hand-holding. Or swimming him through an underwater deathtrap filled with mines. I hope.

When I go outside, I don't initially realize it, but I still have a Wartortle and Grotle with me from before. Which is...not really helpful. There's nothing more to do now either, so I have no choice but to move on. But just as I try to enter the forest, the Professor shows up.

Prof.Hastings:
I don't know whose idea of a prank it was,

Yeah, fuck you Crawford.

but that silly barrier on Lookout Ridge...

Who knows what they'd hoped to achieve,
but a hopelessly flimsy thing it was.

Oh, hell yeah! Hastings just did what I always dreamed of doing in games: just going through a barrier even if it's in the way, and smashing it otherwise!

Prof.Hastings
But that dashed Wendy, suggesting she'd
fly me to Vientown on her Staraptor...

FUN FACT: The name "Wendy" actually came from Peter Pan. Until that book was published, there were no records of that name ever being used in history. There were similar yet less drastic influxes of such name use throughout history - like, there were a lot of "Luke"s around the time of Star Wars' release.

Prof.Hastings
Who might you be?
A Ranger, are you?

Apparantly, that whole conversation was just Hastings talking to himself, just standing there at the entrance to the forest, not even noticing me just chilling there with Munchlax. Again, I am forced to wa...well, jog in this case, to the Ranger Base.

Prof.Hastings
I've seen something like this somewhere.
It was recently too.

Yeah, it was the forest. That's not helping. Get to the point already; what is it?

Prof.Hastings
I've seen this same thing on the way over
here! In Pueltown!

Yes, it was in Pueltown where I saw some men
carrying some machines like this.

Oh, so I guess there's more of them? Pueltown seems like my next destination!

Prof.Hastings
We need to conduct an investigation in Pueltown
right away!

Prof.Hastings and everyone else forgets why he was asked to come here: to tell us what this thing is and not where it is. He thought it was a mailbox when he first saw it, apparantly. I get sent off with Luana to go to Pueltown.

Part 20: Through the Forest...again...

Part 21: <INSERT PUN HERE>

Sure enough, Pokemon everywhere are going nuts in Pueltown. Some guy called Brook somes up and talks to me as soon as I enter, saying something about the drawbridge and him being in charge of it.

- Mission -
Destroy the Strange Machines!

The first thing I do is go save in the Ranger Depot, which is surprisingly empty. Bibarel is a lot faster in destroying the machines than Wartortle, which takes its sweet time. For Bibarel, it only takes one bubble, but Wartortle takes like 12000 gallons of water.

Just as I destroy the first one, I see "Very Shady Guy" with his comrade "Terribly Shifty Guy", and surfer like theme. They're also talking about Gigaremo units or whatever. Since I have only one, I have to make multiple trips.

33. Growlithe
34. Magnemite
35. Rattata
36. Chatot
37. Tyrogue

I saw an Elekid too, but couldn't get it.

Brook:
I'll catch 'em, then truss 'em up a smidgeon
on the tight side.

With all these people promising to tie people up tight, you think all of Almia has an obsession with bondage.

After cleaing the first screen, there were more! The bottom left was blocked by a gate that needed Electrify 2, so I went to the bottom right instead.

38. Elekid

Now I got this. It has what I was looking for. Unfortunately, I needed to find one not being mind controlled. There was also a blue mini nuke machine that needed Electrify 2 to get by. Top left was all that remained...well, and north too, but that hardly counts now!

As I explore around some more, I find Pueltown strangely devoid of the things that make up a town - you know, houses. Unless everyone locked their doors and sealed themselves inside by destroying the pavement so that no one could walk there. Except Prof.Hastings.

Another bomb blaster turbine machine, this one green. Fire 2 was needed

Old Woman:
Did you see how the Pokemon were running
about outside?

We had to bring our plants in from outside
so they wouldn't get trampled.

The first house I find enterable has plants everywhere. Must've taken them forever to do something for an event that will likely only be lasting a few minutes longer. Okay, maybe longer, since I'm typing this as I play.

39. Magby
40. Voltorb

I also find a house in this west district that is somehow not being affected by the machine of doom, somehow. Maybe it has a bunch of lead paint on it? I don't know, this is too fucked up. It has a Growlithe in it, just what I need to destroy the green thingbombers. More lazy design disguised as a convinence!

A large-screen, flat-panel TV.
It's just a wall turned off.

IT'S JUST A WALL TURNED OFF.

I also find the Almia Times building in the same place. Again, for such a recent newspaper, it seems to have quite the startup, with labtops, bookshelves, swivle chairs, and the like. How did they afford it all again...?

So I trash the green machines with the help of the Growlithe in the building with lead paint, and am able to get the Electrify 2s I need to get rid of the blue bombers.

But suddenly, "Very Shady Guy" and "Terribly Shifty Guy" show up and let us know they're going to let their leader know. Thanks for the info, guys! The machines are called Gigaremo, apparantly, but I'll call them whatever I want. Pickles if I have to.

I use the Voltorbs to open the electric gates and get through the bottom right area. There, I find a little girl being danced around by Magbys and Elekids! Melody, in fact, who is Isaac's little sister. Where is he when she needs him, anyway? Brook's there, though...

Brook:
Super Brook Jump!

Unfortunately, he gets into the circle, and also needs to be rescued, because he completely forgot he can just use Super Brook Jump a second time to get out. But I can't just fight them: I need to shut off the machines with the Voltorbs. I find Melody and Issac's grandparents, named Old Man and Old Woman. And yet, Mimi's parents get properly named.

It's a wide-screen TV.
It's perfect for watching soccer.

Err...I don't get how a wide-screen TV is perfect for watching soccer any more than any other TV. Do they even broadcast it in HD?

Again, I find an Elekid in a building not far from the pickle of despair, which helps me clear the blue pickle of despair. Then I get Growlithe to clear the green potato, which was reasonably close and not stupidly close for once.

Boy:
Those funny guys carrying the heavy
things said something interesting.

"I hope the latest model is completed.
This old type is too stinking heavy!"

Just like computers and iPods, the rockets are becoming more and more compact, maybe even to the point of ridiculousness. Of course, there will be one big master one that is even bigger than the first ones.

Once I destroy the green, the game shows the Bibarels blocking the way go away. Apparantly, showing the Elekids and Magbys going away too was less important, because I don't see it happen.

I follow the "shady gang" to the harbor, and find even more of those fucking Bart Simpson dolls.

41. Wingull
42. Raticate

I went a little crazy on Raticate, and took some damage because of it. It's nothing major, though. Wingull tried to hurt me too, but the power-up I got made it do a whopping 0 damage.

I find "Pretty Sneaky Guy" talking with his gang and a Toxicroak alongside a Gold Machine. There's also "Seriously Sketchy Guy",

They received enough data from this experiment, apparantly, and are fine with letting us take over.

Luana:
Let's chance it and ask them.

Yeah, that's a good fucking idea. We all know how well that turned out with Ollie, right? But, since I have no choice...

Seriously Sketchy Guy:
Y-You vandals!

I was waiting for someone to call the Rangers vandals. Seriously, with all the fences and boxes they've destroyed, how could they not be? And I might mention I quite like these guys' names. Reminds me of Earthbound in a way.

They claim they are Team Dim Sun. One of the few (okay, only) names I remember from the Japanese version, Team Yamiyami, makes absolutely no goddamn sense to me. Only reason I remember it is because it sucked in my eyes. Yes, I rather like this name too.

Pretty Sneaky Guy:
We're a criminal syndicate with dreams of
world domination!

Yeah, what else is new?

Team Dim Sun Admin:
Whoa! Why'd you tell them anything!?

When you consider Dim Sun has surfer music, that out-of-character-for-a-world-dominating-person "whoa" kind of makes sense. What doesn't make sense, however, is why this guy just gets called "Team Dim Sun Admin" and they get specific, descriptive names.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Oh, no! I thought I was being helpful!
They took advantage of my kindness!

Scratch that. Pretty Sneaky Guy is now just "Team Dim Sun Minion"

Team Dim Sun Minion:
I'll make them forget what they heard with
a little unfriendly persuasion!

Sure thing.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Team Rattata, attack!

Jesus, how many teams are there in this game!?

I get all four at once, but take a little damage. No biggie, though. Finally, different battle music, too!

Team Dim Sun Minion:
I underestimated you, but this time, it's
for real!

Team Raticate?

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Go, Toxicroak!

Nope, just a Toxicroak. Strangely, the one that was called "Pretty Sneaky Guy" sicced Team Rattata on me, and now "Seriously Sketchy Guy" is acting like he was the one who did it.

I fucked it up the first time, so I instead went and got a bunch of Rattatas and a Tyrogue, and destroyed it. It had way too many annoying attacks. Seriously, I've already had enough of those stupid muck puddle moves.

43. Toxicroak

After I beat it, they all run off like the little bitches they are, taking the gold machine with them. Brook goes swimming after them like a maniac with his sandles in his mouth. Then comes back.

Part 22: King's Quest 2

Part 23: King's Quest 3

Vlad wakes up the next day and finds...the mammon machine completely dismantled by Elaine. Yeah, like that helped. They also got milk pudding from Big Bertha.

Apparantly, the haven't been feeding Ollie either. Yeah, that's a good way to get information. Starving the interrogee to death. BB feeds him it like he was a baby. And he finally talks:

Ollie:
I...I don't deserve this...

BUZZ!

Ollie:
The Vien Forest's fire...
That fire...

It's all my fault!

A confession! Ah-ha! I knew it. We're taking your ass to JAIL.

Ollie:
I'm clumsy, and I spilled Gigaremo's fuel...
It splashed all over, and then...
A spark plug went, and that lit the fuel,
and the fire spread wildly, and...

Okay, so he's explaining how he did it, but what he fails to mention is where the "spark plug" came from. There aren't any electric types or fire types in the forest to cause it. So what caused the spark?

Ollie:
I didn't even know those guys...
I just met one long ago.

"Hey, Ollie! It's me, Really Evil Guy! You remember, class of '83! How's it hanging you old...oily guy!"

Ollie:
He said I could make some easy money, so I
accepted.

When someone says "easy money", anyone with half a brain should know it's probably a scam. Then again, from what I've seen so far, I'd be surprised if they even had a tenth.

Ollie:
Y-Your milk pudding was d-delicious...

Compassion: 1
S&M: 0

Take that, bondage freaks!

After that I have to patrol again. But not before seeing another Almia Times issue. This one's Volume 5. Somehow, their reporters got pictures of Vlad and Luana running around and Team Dim Sun Admin without any of them noticing.

Ollie also asks me to escort him.

Ollie:
My mo--...friend lives in Chicole Village.

Strong Oedipus.

Ollie:
I'd like to see how she's doing, but I'm really
bad at things like this.

STRONG OEDIPUS. Probably can't do much better. It isn't even a Quest, so I get nothing out of it.

But as I'm doing so...

Little Sis:
Listen, listen, it's scary!
A hat ghost appeared at our Partner Farm!

Spooky the Tuff Little Ghost is here!?

I go check it out, and all I find is a hat that's moving.

Ollie:
Oh, my gosh, that hat is moving!
It is a hat ghost!

But that could be anything there - not just a ghost. Jesus, do I have to do all the bravery around here!? I find that it is actually just a Kricketot. One that I had to capture and had WAY more HP than it should've.

44. Kricketot

I then get it as a partner. But from what I've seen so far, Bug Assists suck. Also, Ollie seems to know quite a bit about Rangering, thanks to Elaine. People seem to enjoy telling a lot of information about themselves to their enemies in Almia.

So I drop Ollie off at his mommy friend's house. All she wanted to do is hear him say "I'm home." And apparantly, either his real name is Ollie by some sheer coincidence, or nobody's telling it to me.

More questing is about after that: I help Webster the sign guy by removing a rock that crushed the sign in Breeze Hill. Ya know, the one warning couples to watch out for falling rocks. They're conspiring against us all, I tells ya! They're out to kill us! Instead of just putting the sign somewhere else, Webster wants me to smash the rock so it can go back where it was.

Luckily, I didn't need to go searching for Crush 2, as I had a couple of Beedrill on hand, which...are somehow able to shatter a rock with a single fucking stinger. He quickly brings out the new sign and I get my bonus: Dark Defense. That'd be nice, except I haven't fought any dark types yet.

Young Guy:
Ranger! It's a crisis!

The last crisis I went to had no reward. Does this have a reward!?

Young Guy:
Nah...
"Crisis" is too over the top.
Earlier, I saw a Cranidos being chased by
a Wartortle in the Vien Forest

Well...maybe it deserved it for screwing with the thing? Can't we just let nature run its course for once? But, I have to nevertheless save the Cranidos to get my quest clearing. I grab a Cherubi to make it easier on me, since I know I'll probably be fighting the Wartortle. Even though it's easy enough to catch anyway.

I find them a short while away, playing ring around the tree. Then BOTH of them attack me! And I also learned that figure-8s do NOT work well at all.

45. Cranidos

Sadly, the Ranger Union forgets to send me the Power-Up Data. Instead, I have to settle for having Cranidos as a partner, Which is all right, I guess. Crandios is pretty damn dirty - I have a max attack of its evolution Rampardos on DP. But Rock Assist is not. I mean, why waste time flicking crap at your target when you can be circling them at Mach 2?

Well actually, I was wrong. You can make it like a machine gun, unlike Bug Assist. So I guess it's kind of all right. And through all this, no one questions them having supposed to be extinct!

Then I had back to Pueltown. I find some Arab from the "Haruba Desert" or whatever selling sand. The town also seems to have a problem with Pokemon chasing people...gee, I wonder why that might happen.

More weird shit I see includes...

It's an expensive bookshelf.
It left no money to buy books.

BUT THERE ARE BOOKS ON IT!

Man:
This condo building is the highest in all
Almia

This guy says this, yet, there are only two stories here and no accessable roof, and The Almia Times building also has two stories and an accesable roof! See what's wrong, there?

And there are rumors of Pueltown being taken over and redeveloped by Altru Imc...makes me wonder who the real bad guys are. Unfortunately, I find no quests there.

Also, they found a black stone or some shit in the machine.

Part 24: I Should Just Be Thankful I Didn't Have An Oxygen Meter.

It's a travesty! The bridge...the Norward Bridge...IS STUCK OPEN! Now, they need my help to clear this emergency. Barlow shows me the bridge, which looks pretty closed to me. Since the Prof. hates to fly, we need to find Brook and get his lazy ass back here to fix it, since he operates it and all.

Brook:
...the key for raising and lowering the
bridge is at the bottom of the see.

First question: how did it even get there? Second question: I'm not going to have to do an underwater dungeon, am I?

Barlow
This Micro Aqualung will let you breath
underwater.

FUCK!

Barlow
I... Uh...
I'll stay on shore.

On top of this, I can't bring land Pokemon into the sea, and I can't bring sea Pokemon onto the land. Wonderful. No partner for me. And there aren't even any Pokemon that can function both underwater and on land, like, say, Bibarel.

Brook:
There are fast-running currents, though.
Be careful down there.

God damn it. I hate those puzzles.

The graphics underwater are...really cartoony. I don't like it. The Micro Aqualung looks like the thing used on the show. Of course, neither this or that makes any sense, as all it seems to be is something you put in your mouth, with no actual source of air. The guy also really swims really weird: it sort of looks like he's walking with his feet at a weird angle or wading. Underwater.

Also, voicemail and the Styler works fine underwater.

46. Finneon
47. Chinchou
48. Mantyke

Mantyke's entry states its back patterns vary from region to region, but it's a happy face here, just like in DPP. Then a Sharpedo eats the key.

-Mission-
Recover a Key from Sharpedo!

49. Qwilfish
50. Corsola

I smash a rock and see Sharpedo swimming around in a crevice. Instead of, you know, swimming off the cliff and chasing it, I get forced to do it the hard way. Argh.

51. Staryu

Beyond that rock was a Staryu, which I needed to use to destroy a bunch of wood blocks that I can't swim over or anything.

52. Mantine

I needed this to cross the canyon. Because Vlad can't swim, and can only sink like a rock and wade around a few inches above the ground. Adding to the HP weirdness again, it had a big health bar, but low HP. Riding it is pretty cool in a way - it's not automatic, rather, you can control the Pokemon.

As I enter into the arena, I get told that Barlow was told Sharpedos swim very fast, so the solution is not to cut it off, but to catch currents. And what an annoying solution it is. Took me like 10 minutes to catch the bastard, and when I finally did, I went all-out and got hit a lot. But I got it!

The Sharpedo looks horribly ill.
Is the key it swallowed causing discomfort?

You know, most "horribly ill" things I know don't flee from anything it sees at breakneck speeds. They either violently lash out at anything it sees or acts as deadweight.

I teleport back to the ship afterwards. My Cranidos joins me here, despite not being on the ship when I got on. It also gets off the ship by just walking off - it has no need for jumping like Vlad or Brook.

Barlow
You could even open your eyes down there?

...it never occured to me until just now that I was down there without goggles, and yet still saw clearly. For doing so well under "salty conditions", I get promoted to Rank 3. Apparantly, that's more rewardable than saving a city. Ground and Steel assists open up too, despite, again, never seeing any yet. Oh, and I can now have four Friend Pokemon.

And the bridge goes down! Also, I meet a guy called Murph.

Murph:
I'm Murph, and I'm in charge of PR for the
Ranger Union.

PR? Press Release? Public Relations? Power Rangers?

Murph:
That means I get full access to all the
Union's Ranger databases.

I hope he doesn't know what I did in the lunch the other day.

Murph:
So of course I know who you are.
It's my job to know these things...

It's one thing to have access to the database. It's another to have memorized it out and about.

Murph:
Altru Park is north (^) of Pueltown
Let's go goof off...

Uh, no.

Rappak · 11th November 2008, 08:03 PM

They guy's name defaults to Kellyn. WTF name is that? Kelly is a girl's name and to stick an n at the end...

~~Nando~~ · 11th November 2008, 08:23 PM

I thumbed through the player's guide, so some random info...

-This game seems REALLY long. The condensed walkthrough took four pages in the front of the book.

-There's a Capture Arena in the postgame but it looks different than the old one. It looks like you have to progress through rooms.

-This seemed odd: I turned ahead to the very end of the book, to the Altru Tower section, hoping to find the English name of Team Dim Sun's boss. Instead I found this: "Finally, Team Dim Sun's boss reveals himself and announces his plan." His name isn't given in the book.

EDIT: I found out who it is...and yeah, they avoided naming him to avoid a massive spoiler.

-I noticed one of the Dim Sun Commanders is named Ice.

Rappak · 11th November 2008, 11:14 PM

Both Manaphy and Riolu missions are currently available.

System Error · 12th November 2008, 01:44 AM

They guy's name defaults to Kellyn. WTF name is that? Kelly is a girl's name and to stick an n at the end...

They do that a lot, I've noticed. Well, maybe not THAT much, but they still seem to like weird names that are very close to more common names of the opposite sex.

Part 25: All True, You!

Part 26: Union Path, or, The Confederacy Will Rise Again!

Part 27: Shakin' Things Up!

That special floor screen is broken! And research is being done to develop a Styler that can befriend Pokemon that the slinkees have hypontised.

Jocelyn:
Prof.Hastings is very impatient, even
rash at times.

Haste makes waste! Of course, slow and steady doesn't always win the race. The real moral of that story should've been: don't slack off. A real world application of this is business.

I leave back to Vientown with Barlow, only to have the trip back interrupted by earthquakes. There's a guy with a big Pokemon!

Lady:
He said it was for mountain-climbing training
and went to the Peril Cliffs behind our home.

A woman gives the 411.

Lady:
Every time there's a tremor, my jam
jars fall off the shelves.
My husand's holding them up now.

Or you could, like, just put them on the ground. What the fuck. There's no law that says you need to keep jars on shelves. At least not to my knowledge.

-Mission-
Seek the Origin of the Quake!

61. Staravia

I used Cranidos' assist. Doesn't do any good for capture rank though, much less when you're going machine gun.

62. Larvitar

Barlow:
I don't know who named it, but this is
Springy Grass!

It looks more like a Springy Leaf to me. Somehow, stepping on them makes one jump perfectly over to a predetermined location, without any fear of injury.

I also see the enemies causes the quakes: Rampardos ramming into a cliff! Hypnotised without a torpedo! I have to get over to them! But how...?

63. Pinsir
64. Numel
65. Mankey
66. Mawile
67. Gligar
68. Cherrim

Pinsir had a lot of HP, too. What's with that lack of balance! Not much to say about Numel, but Mankey knocked me off a fucking cliff when I tried to approach it! Then it hit me again! You can bet I made it pay when I finally went to capture it. Then a Gligar did the same. I caught the Mawile after getting back up, and went and got it. Strangely, as I ran into it, Vlad kept climbing in place as the encounter began. It paid too. Cherrim had its leaves open - strange because it's not sunny, but went down nonetheless. Call it whatever you want, but I daringly tried tight circles to avoid its attacks as I captured it. It worked, surprisingly.

Save point! The next area I come to is another one of those areas with hypnotised Pokemon! But these ones aren't like the Rampardos: they're being hypnotised like any other one I've seen before. By a gold laundry basket at that.

Barlow:
It's proof he's up to no good, whatever
it is.

Dude, Barlow. He's started making trouble in our neighbourhood.

Gold bookcases need Crush 2 to destroy. Like, from Mawile. I only had one at the time, and there were two, so I had to take two trips to get them all.

69. Aron

Easy stuff here.

Barlow:
But if you look closely, you'll see
it's only made of plastic.

This is in reference to the yellow electric fan. This presumably was designed this way to make it easier to move. What doesn't make sense, however, is that when the Dim Sun guys ran away in Bueltown, the yellow ironing board was heavy and took four of them to move. Unless this is really dense plastic we're talking about.

Before I go fight the Rampardos, Barlow suggests I get Poke Assists. I'm one step ahead of him: brought a Cherrim, Mankey, Gligar, and Mawile to the party.

Are you ready?

LET'S GET READY TO SUCK IT!

Barlow:
If you get into trouble, don't push your luck.
There's no shame in fleeing!

Last time I checked, you couldn't run from bosses...but do remember this is a citizen of Almia we're talking about. We go over and confront "Truly Shady Guy"

Truly Shady Guy:
Uh.. I'm a geologist!
I'm merely conducting soil analysis.

Oh come on. He could've used a more realistic explanation like "I'm having them break off rocks" or "I'm trying to find a cave".

Well? Do you believe this guy?

Yes. :D

Barlow:
Oh, you're going to believe this guy?

It's too bad, but that guy's lying through
his teeth.

Hey, now don't be hating on the geologist, now. He may indeed be conducting soil analysis! Of course, it may be for an evil, world-dominating cause but hey, it's true nonetheless! It's not the whole truth, but it's nothing but the truth!

Barlow:
I'm curious: what exactly is the soil
composition around these parts?

Truly Shady Guy:
Um, well, uh, let's see...
Uh, there's red clay, and, um, some calcium,
and a whole lot of dirt, and...

Does it look like a bitch!?

Truly Shady Guy:
Um, some water, yes, water, and uh...
A dash of salt and...

DOES...IT LOOK LIKE...A BITCH!?

Truly Shady Guy:
Aack, forget this!
You're good to see through my disguise!

70. Rampardos

I started off with Cherrim. Did a good amount of damage. Then when that ran out, I tried to use Mankey, but got stopped by the falling rocks. So instead, I used Mawile, and assaulted it with steel balls like machine guns until it surrerendered and let me get the final loop.

After the fight, Truly Shady Guy's computer explodes for no apparant reason.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Team Dim Sun will put your lights out!

DUMBEST. TAUNT. EVER.

I report back to the jam woman, and get promoted to Ranger Rank 4. Just for stopping some silly earthquakes! I get access to Poison, Psychic, Dark, and Ghost assists, but as usual, there's no way of seeing if this is true.

71. Doduo

These things appeared from nowhere as I was heading back, and I was taught how to ride them.

Barlow:
Don't go into any buildings while you're
riding a Pokemon.

One, it's not safe.
And two, it's just downright rude!

And yet, walking in normally without any notice is fine? And on that note, god I wish I could have one of those as a partner.

Part 28: My Little Pony...Bird...Thing...

I found out you can use the quests menu to find available quests, which helped greatly in finding them. No harm in doing them now, right? And I have a noble steed to let me get around faster, too!

I helped a Herbert guy find an Oddish for his research. Strangley, when I accepted it, Vlad automatically got off the Doduo I was riding just to do his pose and was able to use it again! I also visited Brook's mom for him, and end up hearing some story about an old king who made all the darkness in the world somehow.

I also help an old man get an Eevee back for his son and daughter-in-law.

Old Man:
They fight so much, our Eevee finally got
fed up and walked out on us.

I've heard of fighting supposedly being good for a relationship or a sign of love, much against my complete and utter disagreeing with it. But this is ridiculous!

Old Man:
There was a proverb, but it loses meaning
in translation, so how's this alliteration?

XFD. I actually cracked up at this. Ripping on direct translations!

Old Man:
Our Eevee deemed their domestic dispute
disgusting and departed our domicile!

I'm more of a limerick man myself. How about...

An Eevee from Bueltown; a city,
Had owners who fought stuff so itty,
When things got too rough,
It did had enough,
"I'm leaving, this place is too shitty."

So I go to the harbor after she tells me the Eevee likes the sea breeze, and find in near Little Girl and Old Man.

72. Eevee

I caught it before it got a chance to attack. Fast spinning for the win! I also find out that I can similarly get off a Doduo without using it up by ending a Quest. As long as I don't have to go indoors, of course. The couple still fights after the quest.

Then I get a Nosepass for Man. I have to go all the way back to the beach cave, ack. So I had to get off to get in, because it's rude to enter caves on a Doduo! Luckily, they're in more places now, and I had the sharpness to get a spare.

Man:
Wahahahaha! It's so funny!
That Nosepass looks hilarious!

If he asked for a Probopass, this would be worse. But out of fucking nowhere...

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Hey, I'm a bad guy. I'll admit that.

Least he's honest. But even he doesn't do anything that selfish or frievelous!

Team Dim Sun Minion:
You owe an apology to that Ranger.

Also, you laugh too much.
It's really rude to the Nosepass!

Then Man admits his mistake, after an evil guy scolds him, and says "Don't try this at home kids!" Then the Dim Sun guy leaves.

I wish I were kidding. He really did say "Don't try this at home kids!" Another person said that earlier, too. I then went back to the bottom of the Ocean to prove Lumineon's existence to a fisherman. With the help of Captain Puel Sea, I go out to the Puel Sea. I'm not kidding about that, either.

A Mantine and Corsola were waiting for me as I go back down. Now that's patience! I again have to do the chasing thing to get the Lumineon, which I find in the innermost part where I found the Sharpedo. It was slower, so catching up with it was easier. But it did not go down without a huge fight. The bubbles kept blocking my circling, just long enough for the bar to drop to 0, until I finally said "fuck it" and slowed it with bubbles. Finally, I catch a gluttoneous Ambipom for a guy who had his lunch stolen. It was easier to get than the Lumineon.

73. Lumineon
74. Ambipom

For all that, I got this.

- Fire Defense
- Flying Defense
- Steel Defense
- Ground Defense
- Rock Defense
- Power Plus

And in THAT order!

Part 29: Finally...The Vlad...Has Come Back...to School!

There's no more quests to do it seems, so I went back to HQ.

Barlow:
Hey, what took you so long?

Did you have trouble making your Doduo
go where you wanted?

Yes..;but no. That's not why it took so long.

Barlow:
Or did you set off on a Quest or two?

Or three. Or five. Or seven.

Vlad gets some more rest and the next day...Barlow has left for Boyleland. Wherever that is. Why, you ask? Well, all the Pokemon there just disppeared.

Crawford:
How is that even possible?

And for once, a character mirrors my sentiments exactly! And so, Crawford is Barlow for one day. And now I get to serve as the teacher for outdoor class in Ranger School! It'd be a bit hard for a mostly-silent protagonist to answer questions, though.

Ollie is working at the base, by the way.

But before I do that, I check my quests. And see another one! Apparantly, a Turtwig is in trouble at Breeze Hill. I like the Grass assist. It attacks me just as it falls off the cliff, and, it ignores all gravity during the fight.

75. Turtwig

Went a little crazy during this, and ended up getting hit for 0 damage a bunch of times halfway through the capturing. It joined as a partner after that. I might mention the join-up animation is really weird. It runs around you for a while, stops, your current partner walks up and talks to it all like "hey he's mine" but the one you just caught tells it to back off and it steps back. I don't take it now, though.

Before going to the school, I get a bunch of advanced Pokemon because...well, I wanted to see if impressions are made! But before I can reach the school, I have to save a Croagunk from being mind-controlled Team Dim Sun, like how the Rampardoses were.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Fly when you're asleep!

They basically screw around a lot and tell it to do all sorts of weird crap. The new machine, which looks like a laptop computer from the future with legs, is called Miniremo, which I will also call whatever I desire. With over a hundred Pokemon commands, it is the latest in Pokemon controlling technology! With great commands, such as...

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Pretend you're a sumo wrestler using only
yoga poses!

It interprets that by jumping over their heads, causing them to turn around and see Vlad. Now, I don't know much about yoga, but I'm pretty sure that was not a yoga pose, nor a sumo wrestler impression.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Here, try entering this command: attack
while laughing uncontrollably!

Yet another fine function of the tabletop machine. But they hit the wrong keys, and make it do...something. So instead they just push it over to me.

76. Croagunk

This was sort of like Toxicroak, but much easier because it had less HP. The Dim Sun Minions swim for it after that. And Croagunk joins as a partner? Well, I haven't tried Poison, yet. It just leaves for the farm without giving me a chance to say "no", though. At least for now.

-Mission-
Teach at Ranger School!

This place hasn't changed much, right down to the Bidoofs loitering in the halls. I meet up with Ms. April, and go to the staff room to meet Principal Lamont. And apparantly, Mr. Kincaid has taken a leave of absence. Gee, I wonder why that could be?

Ms. April:
We've always had nothing but sunny skies
for Outdoor Class. It's like magic!

We've always had sunny skies no matter what in Almia. Except for that one time with that Blastoise, but that was not Outdoor Class!

Vlad shows off "the Range pose" to the students, in lieu of not having a voice. The Question-&-Answer Session of Terror begins!

Male Student:
Did you get good grades at school?

I don't think the question of Vlad's grades were even mentioned...so I guess I'll go with yes?

Female Student:
Is your job busy?

From what I've seen so far.

Female Student:
It must be because of all the strange
incidents in the news...

Nothing escapes her.

Male Student:
Have you ever seen a real Gigaremo?

Yes.

Female Student:
Ehehe...

Is this going where I think it's going!?

Female Student:
Are you in love with someone?

Naw, Vlad's a silent protagonist, baby. He doesn't start love - he ends it.

Female Student:
I've got someone I like.

She gives no hint as to who.

Male Student:
Have you captured more than 100 Pokemon?

I'm not sure. I've got 76 unique ones...does he mean unique or different ones? Judging by Sven or whoever's article before, I'm guessing multiples count. Unless there are 10000-496 Pokemon I don't know about. So let's go with yes I guess.

Female Student:
Is something bad happening in the Almia region right now?

I'd lie here and say no like a media cover-up, but the articles about everything would say otherwise. So I take the other route - instilling panic!

Male Student:
Is it true that Rangers can't go home very often?

They can go home any time they have a spare moment. No.

Female Student:
May I touch your awesome Styler?

rockno.jpg

Female Student:
Oh. Are Rangers cheapskates?

No, but your mom is. ICE BURN!!!

Male Student:
Ranger, is your hairstyle just bed head?

Ms. April
Oh, no, we'll have none of that.

So she's fine with students asking to touch my Styler, which they aren't allowed to use, but asking a simple question about Vlad's hairstyle is not allowed? Huh?

There's one final question...

Team Dim Sun Minion
Dear Ranger, why did you have to mess with
us earlier?

Yes. I mean No! I mean, because it's my job, that's why! Somehow, they got their uniforms dry in just a few minutes, although it was very hard, and are here for revenge! The minions whip out their "new toy" for Ms. April. By which I mean Robolaptop. Then a Carnivine comes out of nowhere and attacks! Two of them!

77. Carnivine

Maybe I underestimated Bug Assist...it was really helpful here. They jobbed completely to it. Then their machine blew up for no reason. One last question by a kid: is it fun to be a Pokemon Ranger? Hells yeah! It's the best side-game in the series in a long time! Only other ones I personally like are Snap and Stadium...I tried Mystery Dungeon Crawler, but found it to be a bore. "New Teacher" approaches me afterwards, and says he hopes to raise Rangers like I do.

But it's not over yet! This really is the Question-&-Answer Session of Terror!

Principal Lamont:
Chairperson Erma of the Ranger Union.
Is she in good health?

Yeah, sure. For this, I gain unlimited access to the school! Squirtles seem to have taken up residence. I don't need to get the Bonsly anymore, but I can break a rock with Crush 2. I use an Ambipom for this. It picks up two rocks with its tails, winds back, and hurls forth one single rock to destroy the one big rock. All I find behind it is a Tangrowth, though. The former boss goes down with ease.

Female Student:
Oh, wow!
You're a real Ranger!
Can I feel your outfit?

The game wouldn't let me.

And finally, as this part closes up, I got to see The Almia Times Vol.07. It is again about Keith, who "[broke] up [a] team of no-goods", and fought some pink haired chick who had an Infernape. Bastard, stealing my fire! I've stopped earthquakes, shut down evil space missile mass hypnotising devices, fought forest fires, and even saved a school. And he goes and fights some bitch and gets on the front page of a newspaper not even in his region!? Where's VLAD'S article, you dicks!?

Part 30: This is Not a Tropical Island

"The next morning" is used again, even though text the previous day suggests it was morning as well. What's the difference between the two, and why use something else?

I get ordered by Crawford, aka Barlow-for-2-days-now, to go to Boyleland, because Barlow is missing. His location even disappeared from the tracker thing back at HQ!

Luana
If his Styler's functioning, it should be
putting out a constant location signal...

But it's not, so the obvious conclusion is...game over, man! Game over!

Crawford:
His location vanished in Boyle Volcano...

Hey, if Barlow's Styler is anything like the quality of Crawford's, maybe it's on the fritz too! ...just maybe.

As there are no quests to do at the moment, I have no other option but to move on. Well, or just screw around, but that's no fun! So I ride over to Bueltown so I can get a ride to Boyleland! I sail to Boyleland the fine vessel of Captain Boyle, the S.S. Boyle! I hope those are just like stage names...

Along the way, Cranidos freaks out over all the Drifloons flying around, migrating. Which is apparantly rare and a sign of good fortune. Wow, Vlad's a lucky bastard. He saw the president of Altru, and now this!

Boyleland has a weird, tropical island theme. Not really fitting for a volcanic island with no vegetation in sight! I meet Captain Puel, who could ferry back to Pueltown if I want. But I don't want.

As advertised, all the Pokemon in the village have gone away. And apparantly, a wild Wingull doesn't count as a Pokemon.

The display shows search results for the
world "magma."

"There is a Pokemon that can ford magma."

I don't know about you, but I'm not exactly comfortable with fording magma. I'd caulk the Pokemon and float.

Lady:
This kind of mystery I can live without.
This isn't a crime drama, is it?

Little Boy:
I saw what happened!
It was two nights ago.

All the Pokemon in town lined up like soldiers
and marched into the cave.

Danger!
I forbid you to enter!

Yeah, what's a sign gonna do to me? Give me slivers? HA!

It's an old iron door.
There is a padlock on it.

Well, shit. Guess I gotta go talk to Village Elder. He gives me permission to enter the cave from the left side. But not the right. Jerk. And I have to look out for some Mime Jr. too. So much to do, so little time...

Part 31: Hot Stuff

Explorer:
I'm searching for a stone that's said to
be found only here.

I could make a pendant out of it as a gift
for my lady friend.

Err...I thought this guy was an Explorer, not a jeweler.

78. Charmander
79. Slugma

Slugma's like Shellos, unfortunately. I find my solution in taking a hit, then just walking on it so I fight it without stepping in lava.

A Drifloon should be able to catch an
updraft and carry you aloft!

That's a steam vent, though...and it'd take a lot more than that to get me off the ground. But, as I mentioned earlier, Physics were damned a long time ago in the Pokemon world...

80. Drifloon

Luckilly, some conviently floated in and were caught without a fuss. They Airlift you by picking you up and just floating across, all while your character seemingly has a seizure.

Wait! These Drifloons weren't in here until recently. By which I mean just now. There's still no sign of Barlow anywhere, which brings up the question of how exactly he got far into the cave without getting one?

On the other side, I find Barlow's Styler. It's turned off, which you are able to do, apparantly. The game tells me the Anchor Clip is gone, but the Styler itself is fine, which means...I don't know.

The next room, my answer is given!

Team Dim Sun Minion:
It took eight of us to finally bind him with
ropes a smidgeon on the tight side.

THERE'S THAT PHRASE AGAIN! Even Team Dim Sun are into S&M! God damn. Oh yeah, Barlow beat the shit out of Team Dim Sun, but was taken down when eight of them tried to attack. He seems to have forgotten protection like say, his Makuhita partner. God, it's like this whole organization suddenly became incompetent as soon as I joined.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Pokemon Ranger, my foot.
He should call himself a Pokemon Wrestler.

"And from Vientown, Almia, weighing in at 279 pounds, B-Low Brown!"

81. Stunky

It stinks. Both in smell and not being caught.

82. Pikachu

5 seconds, Keith. 5 seconds.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Your kind of beating it gets my goat.

Your kind of dyslexia it gets my mind.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
But yeah, I'l beat it all right.

I bet you beat it every night! Team Dim Sun Minion shows off his being able to make any Pokemon do as he commands with the chair by ordering a Slugma and Magcargo to teleport in and attack. Yes, teleport.

83. Magcargo

The guy forgot to make them do the most important part: attack. Again, his television monitor explodes after the Pokemon being controlled are defeated. Didn't they iron that out in beta? I'd imagine every one I destroy costs them thousands of dollars.

84. Magmar
85. Kangaskhan

For the latter, another Team Dim Sun Minion comes up with another footrest. He punches some stuff in, and a Kangaskhan...that somehow got on the ceiling drops down to attack. Almian Kangaskhans seem to have adapted the ability to fire lasers from their mouths, too.

86. Shuppet
87. Lairon

Shuppet didn't really want to cooperate with me. Lairon went down reasonably fine, though.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
That's why we have a fallback plan!
I'll set off the dynamite we set earlier...

I think blowing me up with dynamite should've been the main plan. It is surprisingly quiet, meaning either it was a dud, or explosives come with silencers in Almia. Also, a rock falls and blocks the path. After arguing over their stupidity, I learn one Team Dim Sun Minion is called "Flash", and there's a hidden harbor!

Before I do that, I have a Shuppet open a weird door that looks like it was ripped straight from Twilight Princess with Psy Power 1. In the room, I find...a Muk! And a bunch of poison slime, but that's not important!

88. Rhyhorn
89. Muk

Muk wasn't as bad as it could've been. I couldn't loop it when it used its poison gas attack, though. For some reason, after that, my Cranidos started singing! I broke the rock with Muk, and as I tried to go through the door, three Numels attacked, which I took down with no fuss.

And now I have to sneak into the harbor! And there's a time limit! Since you can't just break through in times like this for whatever reason, I guess it's time to do this, Solid Snake style.

Part 32: This is a Sneaking Mission!

Actually, there wasn't much to say about this. I didn't get caught at all, and got through in about half a minute. XFD, Siren Unit sucks shit! The "ring around the giant metal box" strategy worked well. As I tried to get on, some guards tried to "knock me out" so I couldn't get on, by which I mean sicced some Beedrills and a Gloom on me. But they failed miserably.

90. Gloom

The Beedrills dropped way faster than it did, so I took care of them first. The ship then leaves, and Vlad pushes through the Minions like the big burly Russian he is.

-Mission!-
Look for Missing Barlow!

Another mission starts right here, with an amusing bit of Engrish/broken English in it.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
This is the Kingston Valve?
It looks like a gigantic drain plug if you ask
me. Not a valve.

Ya, Jamaican me crazy here!

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Yeah, that's what that is.

You yank that out, seawater will flood the
ship, and down she sinks.

Umm, excuse me for a minute. But why the HELL would you build a ship with what is essentially a self-destruct button on it? Moreso one that you wouldn't be able to escape from in time if activated? That's just fucking retarded! No wait, that's an insult to all things fucking retarded. This thing is in a class of its own.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
You'd need Machoke-level strength to
muscle it back down.

Incidently, they try to attack me with Machokes, and fail.

91. Machoke

Funnily, all while this was going on, a Houndour was jogging in place. Of course, I caught it...

92. Houndour

What I have never seen, though, is the attack where some dark energy rises from the ground that it tried to use.

93. Spinarak
94. Purugly
95. Mime Jr.

I find the Mime Jr. being controlled by a minion, and when I beat it, it tells me to follow it. It then somehow navigates a conveyor maze in five seconds flat.

96. Ralts
97. Luxio
98. Makuhita
99. Drowzee

When I finally reach Mime Jr., I find a room with a bunch of hypnotised Pokemon and a little blue cinnamon roll. Unfortunately, I didn't have a Luxio, so I had to go all the way back through the maze to get one! But when I finally do, the Mime Jr. comes in, runs around like an idiot for a few minutes, then all the Pokemon leave. Did I mention most of them are Fire-types who would have extreme difficulty returning home from A FUCKING CARGO SHIP!? Of course, it's not like the others would've fared much better, but still.

~~Maxim Posthumus~~ · 12th November 2008, 09:08 AM

Originally Posted by Commander_Saturn

-I noticed one of the Dim Sun Commanders is named Ice.

OH NO!

He was called Ice also in the Japanese version.

I HATE such names! I know that Japanese love English but such names in the English versions DON'T MAKE SENSE!

Snake Bandage · 12th November 2008, 09:14 AM

Originally Posted by Maxim Gwanjangnim

OH NO!

He was called Ice also in the Japanese version.

I HATE such names! I know that Japanese love English but such names in the English versions DON'T MAKE SENSE!

What the hell? When people change things from the original version of something, you're angry. When they don't, you're angry! Are you EVER pleased with ANYTHING?

So, hey, is this game like the first Pokemon Ranger but LONGER and COOLER? Sure sounds like it so far. I think I'll add that to my list of things I seriously need to order online for Christmas, since I loved Pokemon Ranger so much. (Though I still need another DS to get Manaphy, dang it)

~~Maxim Posthumus~~ · 12th November 2008, 09:49 AM

Originally Posted by Snake Bandage

What the hell? When people change things from the original version of something, you're angry. When they don't, you're angry! Are you EVER pleased with ANYTHING?

Eh... But did you ever seen someone named Ice?

They SHOULD NOT have kept that name!

Rappak · 12th November 2008, 09:51 AM

Originally Posted by Maxim Gwanjangnim

Eh... But did you ever seen someone named Ice?

They SHOULD NOT have kept that name!

American Gladiators. Enough said.

Snake Bandage · 12th November 2008, 12:29 PM

Originally Posted by Maxim Gwanjangnim

Eh... But did you ever seen someone named Ice?

They SHOULD NOT have kept that name!

...

Pokemon is hardly the franchise to seek normal names in. Get a grip.

Nekusagi · 12th November 2008, 01:05 PM

I OFFICIALLY NEED THIS GAME.

That said, keep the summaries coming, System Error. They're hilarious.

System Error · 12th November 2008, 06:14 PM

Thanks! And I will. :) Glad to see you're enjoying it. Thanks for the friending too, by the way.

Part 33: Set Sail For Fail

So last time, our hero saved a bunch of Pokemon from a cargo ship, who somehow left despite the ship being on the ocean and none being able to swim very efficiently. And now that I'm rested, I will resume going through this ship.

The room afterward that, I run straight into a Team Dim Sun Minion. He also has the uncanny ability to teleport through mazes, as he quickly runs over to a Giga Impact unit and turns it on. And I learned this...

Team Dim Sun Minion:
The dial's set to "LINE UP!"
Hold it, that's not right!

Lining up is an apparant feature of these things, as evident by the ones from before where Pokemon blocked the way. What doesn't make sense though, is how it is able to make just some line-up and others attack. It's not like you can just have two - the signals would conflict. And getting by all the other issues, destroying one would stop one group from receiving the orders they are ordered to do.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
It has to be set to "ATTACK!"
Spin that dial, clickety-clackety-boo!

I don't quite understand if the doomsday device needs to be set to "ATTACK!" to be turned on here, or if he just wanted it at that setting. Whatever the case, I had to go get a Makuhita to destroy it. Not before finding out Machoke doesn't have Crush 2 for some reason (it has Tackle 2 o_O) and fighting two meddling Drowzees back-to-back, though. Fortunately, I outran their aggressive Teleports the second time.

Speaking of Machoke, though, I had to use one to hit a switch. How Machoke uses Tackle is weird. It punches a couple times, then continues as a bunch of energy forms in front of it. What's even weirder is how the switch reacts to it. It just sort of shakes for a few moments before quickly...uhh...switching. Doing so moves a bunch of giant metal crates that were put on color coded conveyors.

100. Monferno

Seemed kind of out of place, actually. It was annoying to catch as well, until I just used Cranidos' assist.

I then had to open a door by getting a Voltorb to use Electrify. Now, I haven't mentioned this yet, but Voltorbs can attack you on the map like Slugma, Shellos, Blastoise, and they like. How, you ask? Oh, not much. Just by exploding. With enough force to take up half the screen. And char them afterwards. Then they go back to normal and can do it again! After getting it, I tried to go get a Pikachu to Recharge my Styler, but failed, because I leveled up as soon as I caught it. :/

Electric Door
A door with no keyhole, knob, or handle.
It will only open if it gets electricity.

The only problem with this is that there is nothing to open it with outside of a Pokemon. There's no panel, no retina scanner, or anything else to power it.

When I got through, I went into a room with...get this: an Electabuzz and Magmar on hamster wheels. Presumably powering a generator of some kind, but wouldn't a quadrapedal Pokemon work better there? After that, it was some kind of hallway maze. By which I mean a semi-symetrical arrangement of rooms. I found Barlow tied up in the left room. After some identity confusion, he states that it's too dark to see. Even though I can see perfectly fine!

Barlow:
There should be an Electabuzz on board
somewhere.

Electabuzz's Flash can light up this hold.
It should be easy to you!

Oh, there's an Electabuzz all right. There's only the relatively minor problem of it powering an essential part of the ship, but hey! What could possibly go wrong?

The door in this room is locked, so I couldn't move on. Instead, I tried the right room - and encountered a Team Dim Sun Minion.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
You stealthy scoundrel, you!

You evil egghead, you!

Team Dim Sun Minion:
I won't allow you to abscond with the
Pokemon we rounded up!

ab·scond (āb-skŏnd') Pronunciation Key
intr.v. ab·scond·ed, ab·scond·ing, ab·sconds
To leave quickly and secretly and hide oneself, often to avoid arrest or prosecution.

Well, given the number of Team Dim Sun Minions I've fought so far, I'm certainly not doing it very secretly. And since I'm writing this, I'm not going about it in any hurry, either. And arrest/prosecution? XD! Yeah, right. The guy battles me by taking out a computer desk, punching in a few things, and having Mareeps drop from the ceiling and attack. Seriously, what's wrong with the Vulpix and Purugly that were in the room? Why'd he have to drop some Pokemon painlessly from the roof like that? He's not a ninja...is he? They lined up nice and easy, but I was forced to ditch the all-three-at-once because one of them was attacking.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Oh, now you've gone and done it.
I'm in for a dressing down from Captain.

Uhh...I hope he doesn't mean dressing down as in dressing down like...that. Unless it's the Captain's a girl! Actually, on second thought, that makes it worse. Makes it seem as if he leans the other way. Or if that's not the case, he has a "small problem".

101. Vulpix

I went ahead and got these after that. The door in the back was unlocked this time, but all I found there were some Raticate. And more importantly...

A black outfit, black boots, and black hat
are in this locker.

Sadly, I am unable to do the smart thing and disguise myself as a Team Dim Sun member. Might only earn me a few seconds of extra time, but hey. It turned out I needed the Raticate, though. To Cut 2 apart a "wire fence". Because individually cutting apart each link is MUCH easier than just knocking the whole thing down in one shebang!

In fact, when I did use Cut on the fence, it was depicted as being cut clean in two. The top half slided on the bottom half for a while, like something out of a cartoon, then the whole thing exploded "into tiny fragments". This made the two Pokemon get off the wheels (despite the fact that they could've gotten off at any time, since the fence wasn't blocking them or anything), jump for joy, and just start wandering around like any other Pokemon. Fortunately, nothing exploded.

102. Electabuzz

I take to Barlow, and use Flash, which, just like any other flash, lasts forever and lights everything up permanently.

Barlow:
Ollie put up with it without a peep.
Tough guy.

dunt cry bralo

Barlow:
If anyone can snap this rope, I'd say it's
Big Bertha and no one else.

Yeah, about that...there's just the relatively minor problem of getting her here...but hey, if those Pokemon could get off, I don't see why she couldn't get on! But alas, there is no time for that, so I instead have to put a Raticate to work again. It cuts the rope into tiny fragments, without killing Barlow.

Surprisingly, after I do so, his Makuhita makes its first appearance since the picnic near the beginning of the game. It makes perfect sense, seeing as how I never saw it while he was tied up. It just sort of jumped out of him, as if it were a Body Snatcher.

Barlow:
Even in my wildest dreams, I never thought
you'd be rescuing me.

Barlow: "In my wildest dreams, Luana, Elaine, and I are all having fun together, if you catch my drift."

Barlow:
Hey, this is my Styler!

Yeah, nice job dropping it. And turning it off.

Barlow:
It tells me I need to be better.

Oh shi-! Is Crawford going to be Barlow-for-ever now?

Barlow:
There's a lot of new mail in the Inbox.
People were trying to get in touch with me...

Mechgirl1986 I DONT <3 U ANYMORE JERK
WillyJohnson257 SPECIAL OFFER: ENLARGE YOUR PENIS WITH ALL-NATURAL CREAM FOR JUST $19.95!!!!!!
GranHombre Hola, Barlow! Por último, son capaces de ofrecer correo electrónico, gracias a usted. Entonces, ¿qué pasa?
Mechgirl1986 THE RANGER BASE NEEDS U COME BACK TO THE BASE IMETITELY
Mechgirl1986 I NEED U COME BACK TO THE BASE IMETITELY
Bad2TheCubone1 where is your god now oh that's right, there is no god
Mechgirl1986 THIS ISNT FUNNY come back now
TheKingOfRockNRoll1 You disappeared like me, eh? Ya know, it helps if they can find a "corpse", B-Man.
VladimirOfRussia Why am I even sending this Your Styler, it turned off. There is no point to it.
LuanaBanana hi! are you there? you haven't been here since yesterday!
ElderSexyGal3 Ranger Barlow, report in! Will you bring back some tea from Boyletown? It reminds me of when...
Mechgirl1986 WHERE R U PLEASE COME BACK please please please please please...
BestRanger I'm taking over Oh and I hope you don't mind me sleeping in your bed. It's more...
AlmiaBondageClub Weekly Video! Lasso Laura shows off her sexy strapping skills in the latest ABC video! http://ww...
Mechgirl1986 where r u? uve been on that mission for a long time now where r u
letyoursungodownonme19 cut it out alreadythose gigaremo cost a lot of money we'll sue you into jail assh...
Opergirl251 I have a name, you know - Please refrain from calling me by my title. Call me by me give name,...
BestRanger About last night Yeah, we had too much to drink and, well, can we never speak of it ag...
StubbornMan Fuck You - Fuck you.

Barlow:
...Huh?
An incoming message already.

Mechgirl1986 UR ALIVE!!!!! O MY GOSH YES I MISSD U PLZ DONT LEAV AGAIN

Crawford:
Your Styler started transmitting again!
Vlad must have joined you.

Crawford: "This is no time for jokes!"

Crawford:
Leader, I'm glad your safe!

Crawford: "That machine you have that handles the missions stinks like hell! I'd ask Elaine to fix it, but she'd just take it apart."

And with that, Barlow is free, his Makuhita goes back into his body, and he starts following me! Apparantly, this isn't like Ranger 1, where your friends' partners would follow.

Part 34: Hostile Takeover

With Barlow's help, I am able to break down the locked door with a Target Clear. Which goes against my saying I'd have to find a key for such doors earlier! Guess I was wrong. He literally runs the door through, causing it to vanish into thin air, as well as another door behind it, leading to a mysterious room! Barlow also breaks Ranger rules by not leaving after the Target Clear, but in a time like this, who cares?

It turns out Barlow smashed right into the captain's quarters.

Barlow:
This looks like the captain's quarters.
It's got to be tha captain we're after.

Nah, he probably just drives this thing. We're really going to have to fight the Admiral of the Fleet.

Barlow:
...Sniff, sniff...
What is this sweet smell?

Well, when you're out at sea all the time, things can get lonely, and, well...

Barlow:
I think there was an extra-hold kind of
hairspray that smelled like this.

Barlow: "Back in the 80s, hairspray was the way of life."

"X month, XX day
We had a close call today.

Ah, yes, the month of X. The time of year where it's not quite summmer, far from spring, 3/8ths of the way to winter, and has trippier leaf colors than fall. I remember that.

A Ranger named Barlow came close to
disrupting our plan.

"He tried to call us out on our making up days."

It should be a good lesson to us.
We must be more cautious."

Seeing as how I'm here, I guess the lesson wasn't learned, huh?

It's Team Dim Sun's flag.
One is supplied upon enrolling.

No fair! I didn't get a flag for graduating in Ranger school, and these jackasses get one just for enrolling!

There are several books lined up.
"How to Earn Your Boss's Praise"
"The Surefire Way to Promotions"
"Preventing Running in Hallways"

Oh, come on! They were just screaming the captain's identity there.

It seems as though our old friend has a history of failure, as I don't recall him ever being promoted or praised back at his former job.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
The b-b-big Ranger's broken out!

And being big is a bad thing? As long as you're not too big...too much muscle hampers lateral movement.

Team Dim Sun Minion:
Help, someone! I need backup!

At this, another guy comes in from nowhere and they both set up their dressers. They attack Barlow with some Magmar, and me with three Magcargo. Which again, don't even put up a fight. I get all three at once. :D They both run off to get help.

When I leave out the door, the game shows a little cutscene of the ship, for some reason. It's actually very small on the outside. Like, the floor I was just on was twice as big smaller. Last time I checked, aren't boats supposed to be bigger towards the top in order to float? It doesn't seem like it's built in a weird way that would allow it without messing with buoyancy, either.

I go back and save at this point, because I felt a boss may be coming up soon. And I was right! Out comes...you guessed it:

???:
...Well, what a surprising guest we have.

???! Mr. Kincaid got a name change! Well, that or Vlad's forgotten him.

???:
If it isn't Vlad.

Vlad: "We have not met."

???:
You haven't been running in the ship's
hallways, have you?

When a teacher is saying not to run in the hallways, it sounds like a command. When an administrator in an evil organization is saying not to run in the hallways, it sounds like a sinister, yet stupid taunt.

???:
We haven't met since your graduation,
have we?

It was bound to happen sooner or later. I mean, you're evil, Vlad's a Ranger, and Rangers stop evil...and you worked at a school that stopped evil.

???:
Perhaps you don't even recall who I am.

I do, but Vlad doesn't. I mean, he even has the same shirt on!

???:
I was, after all, only teaching the class
next to yours.

I'd mention how I do remember the classes that were next to mine while I in school, but do remember this is Almia we're talking about, with its simple machineless, bondage loving ways.

???:
But I only played at being Mr. Kincaid,
the teacher.

It was all an act, sure. I could tell.

???:
My true identity is...

Damon Killian?

Team Dim Sun's guiding light!
Mr. Kincaid!

Oh. The only difference between Mr. Kincaid and Mr. Kincaid seems to be the outfit. The latter has a cape, weird glasses, and is dressed in black and purple.

Kincaid:
You've certainly come a long way to be
confronting me.

Yeah, but I still get beat out in the news by that douchebag Keith! I mean, I just saved my superior from a fucking evil organization by sneaking into a volcano and raiding a cargo ship, but that jackass shuts down one operation in an ocean of them, and everyone's worshipping him!

Kincaid:
I wouldn't have imagined it from an unruly
child like you.

Nobody imagined people as unruly as Stone Cold Steve Austin or Hannibal Lecter would be confronting the bad guys either, and look at how popular they got!

Kincaid:
Not from one who ran in hallways and
snuck around where you didn't belong.

Hey, Scooby-Doo did it, and look where it got him! ...an annoying nephew and a bunch of inferior spinoffs. Aw, fuck.

Kincaid:
But, your journey ends here.
Fufufu...

Fufufuck that!

With that, eight Team Dim Sun Minions suddenly appear from the doors! Four of which came out of a door that was just a dead end with a Makuhita in it! You can't seriously expect me to believe they were all hiding in that cramped room, Pokemon Ranger.

Kincaid:
You thought we wouldn't notice?

Well, no. I kind of was going a little berserk once I got on the Cargo Ship.

Kincaid:
Minions! Take care of them!

Yeah, like that's worked well before. Despite the fact that there are eight of them, they're only going to do that "attack in groups with increasing skill" kind of thing. They could pull out their desktop computers all at once and zerg Barlow and Vlad, but instead, they're doing this!

First up are four Rhyhorns, two each. And the Team Dim Sun boss music is playing, too. I think it's the boss music! It's so infrequent that I don't get to hear it much. They went down without a hitch, except for that weird pattern I used to get them. I tried to circle them both at once as much as possible, and was eventually forced to circle them both individually in quick succession when they broke apart.

When I beat them, they all sweat beads, say they're ashamed, and every last one of them runs off. What was the point of having them all there again...?

Kincaid:
Very well. Let those incompetents go.

Okay, go ahead. Leave anytime you want.

Kincaid:
Their absence will lighten the ship's load
and reduce its fuel consumption.

I may be wrong here, but I think that only applies to things on the ground. It causes more friction and whatnot. And even if not, the weight of 8 relatively slim minions on a huge cargo ship is negliable, and removing them wouldn't affect it much.

Kincaid:
...I must admit, you two are better than
I'd expected.

This seems awkward for some reason. Is it even grammatically correct to use "I'd" in that statement and not "I"?

Kincaid:
Perhaps you did glean something useful
from the Ranger School.

glean [gleen] Show IPA Pronunciation
–verb (used with object) 1. to gather slowly and laboriously, bit by bit.
2. to gather (grain or the like) after the reapers or regular gatherers.
3. to learn, discover, or find out, usually little by little or slowly.

–verb (used without object) 4. to collect or gather anything little by little or slowly.
5. to gather what is left by reapers.

Actually, you can oftentimes learn things out in the field or in business much faster than you can at home. Like, a business class in College might spend a couple days teaching you about tax, but you can learn it yourself from someone who knows it in 10-15 minutes! Guess that one hit a little closer home than you thought, eh?

Kincaid:
But, to everything, there is always a limit.

Emperor Palpatine disagrees. His power level makes Goku scream like a girl.

Barlow:
How many of these clowns are there?
It's like there's an unlimit supply!

Eight more of Dim Sun guys show up. Barlow says there's an unlimited supply not after hearing Kincaid's words. Hey, I don't blame him. I wouldn't listen to the guy either!

Barlow:
I'll go after Kincaid!
You deal with the small fry, Vlad!

Err...how about: you save your Styler from breaking and go after the small fry, and I'll go after Kincaid. I've got a score to settle.

Kincaid:
Get them!

Unfortunately, I can't make that happen.

Part 35: Hairspray Head

Barlow:
You're gonna get it, hairspray head!

Barlow's lines are so much cooler if you imagine them being spoken with an African-American accent. Barlow runs off to fight Kincaid and his cabinet controlled Drapion. Whereas I get stuck fighting Stunkys and the like.

Kincaid:
Hah! A mere Area Ranger is doing to defeat
this Drapion?

Hey, if I can defeat a bunch of Rampardos, I don't see why Barlow could defeat a Drapion.

Barlow:
I'm not going to defeat it!
I'm going to befriend it!

Barlow's taunt/stating of the obvious not only comes off as extreme passive-aggressiveness (in the bad way), but also stupidity, as hypnotised Pokemon cannot be befriended.

We both charge into battle! I catch the Stunkys, after a bit of struggling. This group of minions, again, swim home in shame. Man, I need to take swimming lessons from them. It'd save having to get Pokemon to do it.

Barlow:
Waaaah!

And, right on cue. Barlow comes flying back, with smoke coming from his body, as though he were an android.

Kincaid:
You deserve kudos for your bravado, but
clearly, you lack the ability.

Hey, I warned him. Note that there's no music during this part.

Barlow:
I'm useless...
My Styler's broken.

Kincaid:
So, where is your pumped-up bravado now?

Right here, bitch!

Kincaid:
The Miniremo is nothing like the crude and
infernally heavy Gigaremo!

Yeah, it's not like I never noticed or anything. Besides not being heavy. And affecting only a few at once.

Kincaid:
Not only is it compact and portable, but it
has over a hundred commands!

The way they're writing this, you'd think this was an advertisement. From the commands I've seen this thing do so far, it looks like most are useless.

Kincaid:
Vlad, you may be interested to
know who developed the Miniremo.

Altru!

Kincaid:
It was a youth, a boy really, about your
age.

Oh, Isaac? Close enough.

Kincaid:
That boy was, and is, a genius of the sort
that comes along once a cenury, if that.

Just because he's a genius doesn't mean he's any more skilled at doing something than someone else. Sure, he can help find formulae and stuff, but even the brightest mathametician is nothing without an imagination. And you need hand-eye coordination to put stuff together, too!

Kincaid:
To recruit that genius, I'd taken a position
at the Ranger School.

I'm not surprised. You need big bucks and big brains to get into Altru, but any old bum can work at Ranger School!

Kincaid:
Does that surprise you?

I actually wrote the above comment up before seeing this line.

Barlow:
You used the Ranger School for that!?
How low can you go?!

Well, he's already abused his underlings, locked little boys in rooms with himself, helped enslave Pokemon, and destroyed the ozone through massive hairspray abuse. The only things left to do now are rape and geocide.

Kincaid:
Fwahahaha! Say what you will.
Now, let us begin your final lesson.
Fufufu...

But you weren't my teacher.

Kincaid:
Go, Drapion!
Show them no mercy!

I'll be expecting constant attacks. :)

There's a nice intro before this fight. It showed the silouette of the Pokemon, there was a flash, and it revealed it in full light as well as its name. It was kind of Megaman-ish, except without any accompanying music. There is "real" boss battle music here, though. It sort of sounds like the Rocket Game Corner basement theme, strangely.

103. Drapion

This was actually pretty easy. I wasn't hit once. I don't see what the big deal is. I started of with some circling, then used Cranidos' assist to machine gun him up a little. When that ran out, I switched to a Fire Assist (Magmar) and continued circling him. Then I used a Blastoise. I'm not sure whether just tossing individual bubbles is faster than throwing big ones machine gun style. I tried individual big ones at first, then started machine gunning it towards the end. Then I used a Machoke. Drapion counted as a Poison type, so it was not very effective as it could've been, but it was better than nothing. By that time, Cranidos had charged up its assist again, so used it, which got the scorpion into capturing range. Easy stuff! I got ike 1350 EXP from it, too.

I guess you could say...

...he was the one...

...who got schooled.

YEEEEEEEEEEAH!

Part 36: The Volcano/Ship Saga Ends!

I defeat Kincaid's Drapion, and it runs off. Again, Cranidos starts singing.

Kincaid:
I seem to have underestimated you,
Vlad...

You already said you did.

Kincaid:
To all crew members!
This is your captain speaking!
This is an emergency!

Kincaid sends out an announcement to the whole ship, all without a microphone or anything. Now that's throwing your voice!

Kincaid:
The crew chief on C Deck is ordered to
pull out the Kingston Valve!

Kincaid: "Don't worry. This isn't a suicide mission or anything."

Kincaid:
All other crew members are to abandon
ship on their on initative!

Kincaid: "As for those on C Deck, your families will be offered our condolances."

Kincaid:
Rangers, do you understand the
significance of the Kingston Valve?

Yeah, your minions only told me like an hour ago.

Kincaid:
Its removal will flood the ship, taking all
evidence of our plan to a watery grave!

Oh no! Now we won't be able to prosecute them! When this ship goes down, there will be nothing we can do about it! I can't use that Mini Aqualung thing to go down there and find anything either we are DOOMED!! DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMED!!!!!

Kincaid:
This will be your final resting place!
And for the Pokemon on board, too!

Eh, can't be helped for the latter, but oh not I! I will survive! Barlow's screwed, though. But who cares? He's useless.

Kincaid:
Bon voyage, Pokemon Rangers!

While this cutscene is going on, Cranidos is still singing through all of it. The plug just got shot off the ship and it's sinking like a rock, and all it can think of doing is singing?! This isn't like the Titanic, you stupid dinosaur!

Kincaid escapes on a Gliscor, leaving two of his minions behind to swim for it.

Barlow:
Vlad, we're going to save the ship,
Pokemon and all!

Yeah, there's a problem with that. I'm not God, man.

Barlow:
I've never handled a ship this size before,
but we're out of options!

Barlow implies he's stopped other ships from sinking in the past; highly unlikely given his fear of water.

We head to the bridge, where Makuhita makes another appearance. All while Cranidos continues to sing.

Barlow:
The closest port is Pueltown, but I don't
think we can stay afloat long enough...

The navigation systems on this thing are still working, and Barlow knows how to use them, somehow.

Barlow:
Crawford, come in!
This is Barlow. Do you read me?

Barlow uses the ship's radio to contact Barlow, as his Styler is broken, completely forgetting I have a perfectly working one on my person.

Crawford somehow gets reached and advises to beach the ship, else abandon it and save ourselves.

Barlow:
I'm going to end this transmission.
My last words were only a joke!

But Barlow is determined to save all the Pokemon! A cutscene shows the plug, which is still gushing water, with no signs of filling up.

Barlow:
But the way this ship's taking on water,
your time limit's...four minutes!

Barlow demonstrates his immense knowledge of Physics by calculating just how much time I have to put the Kingston Valve back in.

Barlow:
Vlad, hurry!
Run through the hallways!

:D

A cutscene shows some Team Dim Sun guys running by me in attempt to abandon this slowly sinking ship. One of them blocks me as we try to run by each other, but fortunately, time doesn't pass during cutscenes.

It says "Undergoing Adjustments" on
the screen.

As I go to save, I get this message. Sure, it's so that I can't screw myself over by saving with a time limit too low, but why would a savecopter on a ship be randomly not working? Adjustments? There's no one here to maintain it in the first place!

Anyway, I continue through the ship, seeing evacuating Pokemon as I go along. The bottommost level is partially flooded, and I had to walk around on huge, heavy metal boxes to get around, some of which convienently floated over to each other so I could walk on them. The only one who hasn't left is a Machoke, just waiting to be caught nearby the valve so it can punch it a few times, knock it 20 feet in the air, to rest perfectly on the hatch.

All the Pokemon joined Barlow on the bridge. Barlow's Makuhita then spots an island with a small pier, and he turns the ship there.

Male Student:
Do you know why this place is called
Ascension Square?

For no reason, we get a cutscene of the Ranger School. Last time I checked, that wasn't an island. A male and female student are conversing about that stone, when Barlow crashes the ship into the pier, taking out half the land in the process.

Ms. April
What's going on here!?
What is that giant ship doing here?!

It's a party!

Vlad then walks out of a hole in the side of the ship, perfectly fine. The other Rangers show up, as well as the school staff. And Barlow poses on top of the ship, all while the horn somehow rings out.

Part 37: Reach the Top, Until You Gotta Learn...

As the Leader, I'd like to say a few words
to end this send-off party.
I always knew this day was coming.
You're not the sort to start and finish as
a Ranger in the sticks like this.
When I handed you your Styler, I already
had that feeling.
But I never expected this day to arrive
so soon...

Some screen with this on it after the last scene fades out.

Barlow:
Well, we can laugh or cry about it, but from
today, Vlad is a Top Ranger.

Fuck yeah! Sadly, now I must leave my friends for the union...

Crawford:
[Chairpersona Erma] said that you were absoutely needed
by the Union, Vlad.

They have ten Top Rangers already, though.

Luana:
Oh yes, Vlad, here's the latest
issue of the Almia Times.

It's got in-depth coverage of your
cargo-ship adventure.

HELL YEAH, MOTHERFUCKER! Suck it, Keith. Suck it long and hard.

It seems as though the photographic couldn't get a scene of me at the wreck, however. They had to settle for one with me posing around all the students. Well, the wreck is there, but none of my fellow Rangers are. Also, they somehow got a fucking picture of Kincaid, but it's all blurry.

Elaine:
When you joined, our team turned into a
really decent one...

I must be a god among Rangers to make up for it, then!

Barlow:
Come on, we'll have one last toast with
another glass of milk!

Looks like Barlow's breaking out the hard stuff! That stuff is homogenized!

I was half-expecting the Top Ranger article in my Glossary to be updated to include Vlad, seeing as how there are now 11 Top Rangers. But alas, it has not...at least not yet. Mom, Little Sis, and Ms. April are outside, waiting to congratulate Vlad. Hell, everyone in the town wants to buy me a beer. And all the Pokemon on the ship? They all got back to Boyleland! I don't know how.

Exploring around reveals pretty much everyone else wants to congratulate me.

Female Student:
You're Vlad, and you graduated
from here, didn't you?
You're even more dazzling than I imagined...

Some more than others.

Lady of the Ridge:
When I get a good look at you, I can see
you have grown up.

This was in a cutscene for some reason. It also showed that Altru's tower is a little bigger. I don't even get three feet before yet another one starts, where Wendy the Staraptor Rider carries me the rest of the way. As soon as I enter the conference room, a message pops up...

Effective immediately, the Ranger Union
certifies you to the position of Top
Ranger.
You are hereby recognized as the eleventh
and one of only twelve chosen Top Rangers
around th eworld.
The peace of the Almia region is under
growing threat. We must have your help.

Twelve, huh? I'm basing this on nothing at all, but it looks like Keith's a top Ranger too! And I was one before him! HA! Suck it Keith! Again! Suck it long and hard! Again!

And indeed, I am right! Number twelve comes right in the door, and it is Keith! Four are in Almia, incidently, meaning Keith may be coming back here.

Chairperson Erma:
Incidentally, haven't you two noticed?

Noticed what?

Chairperson Erma:
You should both be very familiar to each
other, dears.

Oh, right. That whole thing. Apparantly, we were chosen to punish Team Dim Sun. I don't see what this will accomplish, but hey.

Prof. Hastings:
You two are free to do as you wish without
restraint.

Fuck yeah, party at Hastings' house!

Prof. Hastings:
I present you with the symbol of Top
Rangers: the Fine Styler!

I don't get what's so fine about Fine Stylers, but Power Charge is now usable. Whatever that is.

Prof. Hastings:
The Fine Styler can charge up power for
making captures more easily.

And yet, it still can't "overkill" for more EXP like in Ranger 1...I think.

Prof. Hastings:
We've cleverly named this feature "Power
Charge."

That's not clever and you know it!

By holding down the stylus, the Styler will charge power. When "UP!" appears, I can circle for double the power. Of course, I have to watch I don't crash into anything...

Keith:
This Buizel's my Partner.
We met in the Fiore region.

I still think Wendy's Staraptor is the coolest partner so far. Even cooler than Cranidos! I'd personally prefer a Dodrio, though. Agility anywhere, anytime!

I head to the Operation Room in the Ranger Union, which sounds way too close to a hospital for my liking. I also learn about Top Operators. Linda, Marcus, and Rhythmi are the top operators. Apparantly, the unnamed one from before got kicked out so she could take his place. Bitch. Also, there are implications made that there's a teacher conspiracy to make dreams come true through the Pledge Stone.

Finally, I can assign Missions to myself! Which I won't be able to do, anyway. And just like that, I get a mission assigned: with Keith, go help Sven in the Chroma Ruins in the Chroma Highlands.

Linda:
The name may make you imagine a refreshing
mountain meadow, but it's nothing like that.

It made me imagine a crystal mountain.

Linda:
It's covered in a pitch-black mist.
It's not nice at all.

Doh! Looks like we have another annoying...well, overworld location.

~~Nando~~ · 12th November 2008, 08:13 PM

Yeah, thanks to Bulbapedia thinking he was the BOSS, I screwed everything up. HE is just the vice president of Dim Sun, the actual boss is not seen until the end of the game and I do not know his name.

The "Hell Trio" are now called the "Sinis Trio" and another of their members is named Heath.

Thread: Pokemon Ranger: Shadows of Almia - Information Thread

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