Where Do You Go When You Can't Turn To Your Family?
by, 5th November 2012 at 12:51 AM (444 Views)
It's not enough to fuck with my sisters, but my whole family now too?
*sigh* So for the past couple of weeks, I`ve noticed this one guy on my site who has been giving one of my members a hard time. He says he thinks everyone hates him, and he's trying really hard to live up to that it seems. He hogs all of the wilds, he criticizes his roleplaying partner's roleplaying style, he's overly affectionate, and he's incredibly clueless. Asks the n00biest things constantly, that are written down in a guide. -_-
But I`ve been trying to help his roleplaying partner, whom I love like a little sister, work with him by giving her advice and cheer her up when he takes her down. It's been okay for a little while, until today.
For the past week on VS, we had a Trick or Treating event going on. People were supposed to post at NPC's houses and they`d get a trick or a treat in return. The last couple of days, my big sister and the backbone of VS got on despite still being pretty sick, and helped me finish the event. Thanks to her, it got done approx. THREE DAYS earlier than expected. During this, she gave out some awesome stuff. She gave out ice-type pokemon of the receivers choice, a choice between an event rayquaza or a random legendary pokemon, and even unleashed a NEW event that I myself wasn't even considering. Yet she asked me for the sprite and tweaked it for use and gave it out.
This is the Varaia Dratini. A Dragon/Poison type pokemon exclusive to events. It was just released, specifically for this holiday solely by my big sister. Isn't it cute? <3
After the event ended she asked me, the second day in a row, for a pokemon contest. We haven't had one in MONTHS, and I haven't been totally feeling up to making a contest because I didn't feel like the site was ready for another one yet, but it's my big sister. She wants one and I love her to pieces, how could I say no? I went ahead and scheduled one and started prepping for it. I have a bit of trouble with my computer, but I get that resolved and opened signup. Cue the whining.
My sis has this coordinator named Azel who has 3 ribbons. He has those 3 ribbons because he was incredibly lucky with our battle code. Even though it's neither his fault nor his owners, everyone is terrified of him and some outright refuse to sign up when he is entered.
So as you can imagine, the fear of Azel is so great, it completely overwhelmed the fact that WE WERE HAVING A FUCKING CONTEST AFTER AN UNKNOWN AMOUNT OF MONTHS WITHOUT ONE. A couple people cracked "I know who is getting the Droughtenna Ribbon", though one said it in joking. The other? You guessed it. My little sisters bully. Thanks to all of that, big sissy pulled out of the contest.
I can forgive abusing a broken move. I can forgive picking on my little sister *because it was a GREAT opportunity for me to teach her how to deal with shit like that, annoying as it was to hear he was doing it*, but when you fuck with my big sister, who is already self-conscious because she thinks she is some sort of monstrous unlovable bitch, that's crossing the line. I am normally very calm and reserved, and prefer to deal with shit in private, but hurting my sisters so terribly is something I will not fucking tolerate.
I threw a MASSIVE tantrum unlike any tantrum I have ever thrown before. I can only count one other time where I was as angry as I was here, but this time it got worse, not better.
And yet, despite all of that, NO ONE had anything to say. My baby sister also threw an uncharacteristic tantrum in chat and the little turds STILL had nothing to say. One guy is sick and kinda meh, so I`m annoyed but understanding with him, and I found out another had gone and talked to my big sister, but the two people who started it all? I don't know if the one who made the joke said anything, but I have not heard about the bully.
I had left the site to keep myself from banning people left and right, but my baby sister kept an eye on the chat and let me know what was going on. No one said anything in chat until Bleach showed up like, an hour after it happened and asked what was going on. Instead of going in and ripping into everyone, I decided to retreat to my cyber-family, the Dragon Dogs, who I have been with for almost 4 years. I thought maybe if I played a little bit of the game we're all on and listen to their whimsy, I`d calm down. But I guess I can't keep two worlds apart. I can't even have THAT much can I?
My baby sister's bully as it turns out JOINED the Dragon Dogs. After hearing me talk about the game we were playing he started playing himself and, unbeknownst to me, got himself integrated into the family. I didn't know he was in DD until after I kicked him from the chat *for his own safety, because I would have gone apeshit on him*. people in the family have DD in their name but in my fury all I saw was his name. THAT is how pissed I was. So after finding that out I told him he could go back in and left the chat. I did other things to occupy my rage, and when I concluded he would not be in the DD chat, I headed on in to face the wrath of my Uncle. I figured that little stunt would cost me my mod status, but I didn't think it would cost me my family.
First he asked me if I played D&D, and started going into the "if your members piss you off don't let them know it, be subtle" but I KNOW all of that. I asked him to stop beating around the bush and get to the part where he takes my peg *my mod status*. He said that if he was going to do that he would have done it. But then started telling me about keeping VS shit in VS and leaving DD out of it, and again I KNOW this already. Then he asked me to do the unthinkable. He asked me to apologize to the new guy. I flatly told him "No. I won't do that." This douche greatly wronged me and my sister and I left VS to GET AWAY from it, and he followed me. I kicked him because I didn't want to start a huge fight in front of everyone, but I DID want to stay in so that I could watch the whimsy of the Dragon Dogs to cheer me up. My Uncle asked me one more time, and I told him an empty apology is worse than none at all. I was willing to apologize to DD for bringing them into it, but I am not going to apologize for something I don't regret. I was not the one who brought him to DD, I didn't even mean to bring him to the game I was on! I was just talking about it and he asked me about it! If I had KNOWN he was being considered as a DD I would have spoken out against it! I told my Uncle there was a reason not every Victory Seeker was a Dragon Dog and why not every Dragon Dog was a Victory Seeker.
I also told him that he has known me for almost 4 years. He has seen me be pissed with people. He's even seen all the pissing get worked out. But this was different. This guy had greatly wronged me and I am NOT going to apologize without any action on his part. Saying sorry to him for kicking him when he hasn't even acknowledged the reason of WHY is telling him that I was being unreasonable when I got angry on VS and that he really didn't do anything wrong. Well "sorry" to tell ya, but yes. He DID do something wrong. He DID deserve that kick. He DOES deserve my fury, and I am not going to take ANY of it back until he EARNS it. He hasn't EARNED my apology so I am not going to give it to him just because he managed to worm his way into my family without my knowing it.
And so Uncle said "then I have no choice, I`m sorry to do this" and took my mod status. Then he gave me the "if you can't act like a member of my staff then you won't BE a member of my staff" speech.
I don't care about the peg. I don't care about the modship. I didn't actually use it all that much because I was mainly a recruiter, my job was to take in apps and it kinda annoys me because I am afraid of forgetting my lines. I don't even care that the victory seeker who pissed me off is in the family. It's the fact that in 4 years, my Uncle doesn't know me well enough to ask me about potential members who happen to come from my site, and can't recognize the difference between me being annoyed with someone and me being genuinely upset and attacked by someone I called a comrade. I feel like he isn't looking out for me the way I thought he would, and that hurts more than any peg being taken away. I love the Dragon Dogs so much, and still do, I would do anything for them despite this little hiccup. I just thought maybe they`d do the same, if only in the form of getting my opinion on things....
I know it's not fair to him when I say my baby sister's bully is tearing me and my family apart, but it makes me feel a little bit better to. Tomorrow it will be the same old song and dance. I`ll head into VS and talk with everyone like normal, maybe even start to RP a bit since I don't have to worry about doing any plots or events for them for awhile. At the same time I`ll log into my cyber-family's game and grind my character a bit.
But right now, I need some chocolate and a warm dark space I can curl up in and hope that this is just a dream I will wake up from and laugh off with everyone.
I need a hug. :(
/end venting, thanks for putting up with my whiny shit Bulbagarden.
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