by, 27th May 2011 at 06:12 PM (371 Views)
Marilyn Monroe wasn’t talented or pretty. Big dogs are not cute. Life is not hard. People never need to grow up. No-one who has ever been involved in the X-Factor is talented. Text imposed over vintage looking photographs is not deep or artistic. Adele is un-imaginative, un-original and un-talented. Peter Kay is not very funny. Episode 1 was not that bad. Tacky pop music is inferior to every other genre. Life is entirely about being happy, and making other people happy, nothing else matters. Drugs are not cool. Nor is violence. The party starts before K$sha walks in. Seeming masculine is only important if you are confused about your sexuality. True love exists but it is not about emotional sentences and romantic moments, that is what films are about. Cats always win. So does Thom Yorke. Right wing politics are deceitful and manipulative. Pokemon silver is better than Pokemon gold. Macs are better. Christmas is the best time of year. Megan Fox is Fuck ugly. Scarlett Johansson isn’t. Being orange isn’t cool. Being size 0 isn’t either. Not everyone is beautiful, but life isn’t about being beautiful. Nor about being rich. Real men don’t buy women. Nor hit them. They also know that most women are in fact cleverer than them. If you don’t want to be judged as a slut, don’t wear unbelievably revealing clothes, it’s sluttish. Children do not need to be closed in and protected, there are the same amount of pedophiles now as there was in 1912. Space is more interesting than Soaps. As is everything else in the universe. Pizza is the best food. There is never any harm in being nice to people. Blur are better than oasis, and mods are better than rockers. It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness. The most important things in life can never be summed up in a paragraph on Tumblr.
Oh, and Charlie Sheen isn’t winning, he’s dying. Obi wan is winning, and he’ll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.
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