It finally happened...
by, 4th January 2014 at 10:31 PM (141 Views)
Rant blog ahead: you've been warned.
Well, it finally happened. Honestly, I'm surprised it took them this long. Someone at the business office must not be paying attention.
What happened, you ask? The university I go to put me on academic probation. The worst part? I'm can't even find it in me to care anymore.
Now before you go thinking I'm all depressed, it's not life that I don't care about. It's school. I don't even know what happened. Somewhere along the line I just... stopped caring about school. I stopped doing homework, started skipping classes more often, everything. I literally just stopped caring. My grades plummeted, I'm wasting money, and any sane person would get mad or upset, but I didn't.
I just can't take it anymore. I'm taking useless "general education" courses that serve no purpose in my life. Gee, I'm an English major, but I'm sure that paper I had to submit regarding the process of translating DNA to RNA in Biology will totally help me get a job! I'm sure that report I had to do on the philosophical implications of skepticism for my philosophy class will totally help me succeed in my career field! And that paper I had to submit regarding the ethics of torture in 15th century England will, without a doubt, totally pay off sometime in the near future! >_>
There's no reward for doing good either, besides the prestigious honor of continuing to go to the school. Whether I get an A or a C- in a class, I still pass, so what's the point in even trying hard? It's even harder to try and motivate myself to do anything when I have absolutely zero interest in the subject material. (See above: useless classes)
Before you go and say I'm being lazy, again, this is a school-only problem. With my job, I work hard, show up on time every day, and generally do my best. Why? Because there's a tangible reward in doing well. In working hard, I get paid, I impress the bosses, and I get closer to the possibility of a promotion. What do I get for getting an A+ on a paper? A pat on the back? I wish. I get nothing. I get the useless satisfaction of having written a useless paper that I'll never look at again for a class which I'll promptly forget about once it ends because it has absolutely no practical application whatsoever. Yay?
All of that to "graduate" and get a piece of f***ing paper with my name on it and my degree. A piece of paper that society mandates I get because obviously I'm an incompetent moron without it. It's bullshit. It's complete and total bullshit. Regardless of whether or not I'm actually good at what I do, nobody will even consider hiring me unless I have $25,000+ in debt and a piece of paper with my name on it. $25,000 in debt, three quarters of which was spent on f***ing useless classes that I won't even remember because they literally serve no purpose. All for a piece of paper; a piece of paper that is not even a guarantee of actually getting a job. A piece of paper that will make companies say "maybe we'll hire you. Maybe. Okay, no we won't really hire you, but we'll certainly get your hopes up anyways."
I know I probably sound like a lazy, whiny, entitled brat right now, but it's honestly how I feel at the moment. Maybe I can find some shrivel of motivation this semester and pull my grades up. Maybe. Of course, that's what I said the last two years. You can see how well that turned out... >_>
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