The Trainer's Log
by, 29th August 2011 at 05:10 PM (219 Views)
Alright, I just beat Lt. Surge in LeafGreen, and so now that accursed Snorlax is blocking my way. I figured, before I actually try to make it move, maybe I should try to catch a shiny Magikarp. I always thought it would be funny to catch a Magikarp, then exhaust all of its PP by spamming Splash (that's basically all it can do anyway), and then, 40 turns later, it learns Struggle and Magikarp actually attacks! Now, I know that it learns Tackle at level 15, but I just thought that would be funny.
So, why am I catching a Magikarp? For the lulz. That's why.
And so I thought, Why not make it a shiny Magikarp? So now I'm endlessly fishing all over the place, looking for a shiny Magikarp. For the lulz.
This... is The Trainer's Log.
I just began my attempt at catching a shiny Magikarp. I've got a crummy Old Rod and a backpack. I'm going in.
I'm now in the forest north of Vermillion City. Fishing in a freshwater lake.
I've reeled in about 50 Magikarps so far. I'm getting hungry, and this heat is bugging me. I think I'll eat a sandwich.
That's Magikarp number 60. Just over 8,000 more to go before I'm garunteed to get a shiny.
Ate my sandwhich. Fed the crumbs to the Magikarps.
Haven't been getting very many bites lately. None of them shiny, of course. Passing the time by skipping stones and playing the complete works of Billie Idol on my radio.
"Do the rebel yell... long, long, long... something something something... I don't know the words-- REBEL YELL!"
I'm starting to get hot. I'm tempted to get in the water, but I think these Magikarps have fangs. I see a cheeseburger to my right.
It tastes oddly like a rock, and it's REALLY hard to chew.
I finally ate that cheeseburger.
I don't feel so good.
There goes Magikarp number 90. Still no shinies. Currently passing the time by throwing rocks at passersby, them not seeing me from behind the tall grass.
This water looks safe to drink. I think I'll use it to wash down my cheeseburger.
I just threw up in the woods while taking a piss. I think it might have been that cheeseburger.
My rod is starting to splinter a bit. I'm tortured by this sea of red, nothing-special, non-shiny Magikarps.
I'm starting to get wierd perverted fantasies. I'm laying down in the grass in the hopes of looking up someone's skirt. Nobodie's gone very close to my spot though.
That reminds me, I need to take a bath.
I'm laying down on my back right now, fishing with my feet. No shinies yet.
I think I see some chocolate pudding in the woods. I could use a treat.
That wasn't chocolate pudding.
I just remembered that I brought a sandwhich with me. Yumm...
Some of these passersby are starting to look pretty tasty too.
I've been out here for two days and I'm starting to get tired. My legs are funcioning less and less under my control.
My crazy legs compelled me to run up to a female camper and lift up her skirt. I don't know what got into me.
Now I have this wierd red bruise on my cheek. I don't know how I got it.
That red bruise on my cheek is still throbbing.
That's Magikarp number eleventy-six.
This grass is starting to tickle me.
I thnk I need to get this bruise on my cheek looked at. I would if I could remember the way back to Maximillion City.
Some real nice kids came by and told me that if I ate this vine that was growing on a tree next to me, then I would feel better. I ate it.
Damn those kids. That vine they told me to eat was poison oak.
Now I have poison oak in my mouth and a throbbing bruise on my cheek. I've lost control of my legs and they're making me do things like run around singing "A Horse With No Name". Although, with my poison oak in the mouth and all, it sounds more like "A Horth Viff Do Dave".
The creatures of the night are starting to come out. Spearows stole my backpack and a chupacabra stole my liver. I think.
my mind iz startin 2 fale me
im gettin dumer an dumer to teh point were i rite lik a 12 yr old boy duz on facebook an youtub
i tink ill go 2 sleep now ill see if i git any bettr tomorw
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