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Karamazov

X and Y suck

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by , 21st October 2013 at 12:39 PM (1960 Views)
So here are my ideas on how they could correct their mistakes for the third version. Take note, Game Freak. This is how shit should be done.

1. The rivals are boring and lame. Here are some new proposed angles to their characters to give them depth.

a) Shauna: She'll speak in memes, representing those hyperactive kids on YouTube and 9Gag who are obsessed with memes. Her humor will rely on Internet references she can't explain. All her sentences will end with XD. This will help her become more identifiable with the target audience.

b) Tierno: It's never too early to teach kids about injustices. He's fat and proud, and a social justice warrior! When he's not yelling about the patriarchy, he's chastising people for fat-shaming. Sometimes in the game, you can access his blog about 'thin privilege,' where he celebrates every kind of body type but the ones society deems attractive.

c) Trevor: A pop star. You know how Justice Beaver and One Reflection or w/e. Pokemon catching by day, holding concerts by night. Like Hannah Montana, he has a secret identity, as Talos Kalos. His songs can be heard throughout the game as inserts.

d) Serena/Calem: Okay, they're just boring and there's no saving them. But at least make them interesting to look at. So, give them guns and bikinis to attract an older audience. Fans of GTA will love the Pokeball Factory robbing mini-games.

2. The other characters need depth too.

a) Diantha is boring. Angst and trauma always make characters deeper and more interesting. So let's make her a gothic fallen angel. And a real angel, to compliment AZ's immortality. And she's also the daughter of Red, to make her more powerful. Also, give her a legendary.

b) Sycamore needs to get involved with the plot. In addition to making him the leader of Team Fire, he also helps you and gives you more powerful Pokemon during the game. He gives you Mewtwo at level 100 after the third Gym, like in the demo. After the fourth Gym, Arceus. The fifth, Reshiram or Zekrom with Kyurem, along with the DNA splicers.

c) Lysandre's goal is stupid. He should be cooler, and fight you himself. He wants to fuse people with Pokemon to create Pokemorph anthros. He'll fuse with the opposite legendary to fight you, while you fuse with the legendary of your version to fight him.

d) Team Flare is now Team Fire, because it sounds cooler. Their suits are a dark gray and they have Xenoheart hair, so they look much more intimidating. They throw their Pokeballs out of bazookas, so it looks like they're shooting you when they're really not.

e) Your mom shouldn't be a Rhyhorn racer if there isn't an option for you to race in the game to race. So instead, she mugs taxi cab drivers in Lumiose City.

3. Make the locations more familiar.

Since Americans are the ones who play the games the most, we'll make Kalos less French in order to seem more familiar.

a) Lumiose City is like Detroit, with a lot of smog and fog to reduce visibility. It's also like the city in GTA V, with more car-jackings and a much higher crime rate. Instead of wasting your hard-earned money on expensive clothes, why not steal them? This will attract the older fans who play COD and the like. Since the city's under a blackout, now's your chance to rule over it!

b) Vaniville Town is also under criminal siege. You have to sneak out or attack the Team Flare grunts to get your starter in Aquacorde. Think Metal Gear Solid. This is why Serena/Calem has guns, as I mentioned earlier.

c) The areas between Gyms are just a boring chore to go through, so let's spice it up and add some atmosphere. The Routes will have a post-apocalyptic feel, like The Road Warrior. There will be pot-smoking teenagers, street gangs, and the option to drag race.

d) The lost hotel was mysterious and fun, but what if we had more of them? All the hotels are steaming ruins of doom and mystery.

4. Improving items and mechanics.

a) Your bike is now a motorcycle. You rob the bike shop owner in order to introduce you to the stealing mini-game mechanics.

b) You know get up close and more involved with Pokemon breeding. Use mon-Amie to force them together in order to mate.

c) The skates have rocket boosters so you can go faster and perform aerial tricks.

I hope you all enjoy my suggestions and that Game Freak uses them to improve the franchise for the better. Thank you.
Leggo, Pavell, L.L. and 5 others like this.

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Comments

  1. SharKing's Avatar
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    XD
  2. internetro's Avatar
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    cant tell if serious or troll tbh
  3. Karamazov's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spheal
    cant tell if serious or troll tbh
    I am very serious. If this franchise wants to stay afloat, it needs get with the times and follow these suggestions.
  4. Xita's Avatar
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    I agree with your complaints, but your suggestions are...well...
    Charles Dunois likes this.
  5. Karamazov's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xita
    I agree with your complaints, but your suggestions are...well...
    Brilliant. I know.
  6. Bubble Frog's Avatar
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    The rivals do suck thus far.
  7. Buoy's Avatar
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    these suggestions are completely wrong. all characters should be mudkip, all pokémon should be mudkip and the game should just be a huge 3d model of a mudkip. all dialogue is henceforth to be replaced with 'so i herd u liek mudkipz XDDDDD'. if this EXACT thing doesn't happen in the next game, then maybe game freak should think about stopping the production of anything to do with pokémon -- they're ruining the franchise. :/
  8. Spikeheila's Avatar
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    Haha, I like this blog XD

    Quote Originally Posted by Gotpika
    The rivals do suck thus far.
    I wouldn't really say they suck. They're just more like average folks who just want to make a name for themselves, with different goals than racing you to the badges and trying to beat up on you every step of the way there, that's Calem/Serena's job and, tbh, they aren't even 'rivals' because of that. For me they feel more natural though.

    They're literally just average joes, and somewhat elevated from the other folks in towns and other trainers. But I,myself, think that, that's what makes them special. Unfortunately, I kind of think they definitely realize that you're also better in every way than them, almost no matter what they do, which kinda makes me feel sorry for them.
    Scarlet Sky and Leggo like this.
  9. HumanDawn's Avatar
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    I'm so disappointed that this blog hasn't suggested that shiny Pokemon should have a 9.99% chance to show up.
  10. Karamazov's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HumanDawn
    I'm so disappointed that this blog hasn't suggested that shiny Pokemon should have a 9.99% chance to show up.
    Because I only come up with good ideas. :)
  11. CrackFox's Avatar
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    Personally I think the game is great. The characters are generic but who really cares about them anyway. As long as they stay outta the anime :B

    I'm not that keen on the starters though they aren't terrible. The graphics make up for everything I think and I love gliding around on my skates, even if the controls are a bit sloppy. The EXP share is great. The only thing I could really do without is Team Flare, I don't mind them in the game, whatever a battle is a battle but I just know they are gonna dominate the anime and it's gonna bore me to tears.

    If I could have improved the game it would be simple touches, more clothes, more hairstyles and slightly more demanding, walking with Pokemon and having a phone. HG/SS could teach X n Y a thing or two. I really miss being phoned by youngster Joey...not..but I do miss the phone.
  12. Jack Pschitt's Avatar
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    I have a better idea.

    1. Take Grand Theft Auto V. Not the engine, like, I mean the whole game. Just take it.
    2. Put all the budget into creating a highly detailed mod that adds all the Pokemon, moves, items, experience mechanics, etc., into Grand Theft Auto V. Hire a couple of Coke-addicted twenty-somethings, they're best at this modding crap.
    3. Allow the player to steal Pokemon when they faint.
    4. Release the finished product as Pokemon: Fuck This Version.
  13. Bubble Frog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikeheila
    I wouldn't really say they suck. They're just more like average folks who just want to make a name for themselves, with different goals than racing you to the badges and trying to beat up on you every step of the way there, that's Calem/Serena's job and, tbh, they aren't even 'rivals' because of that. For me they feel more natural though.

    They're literally just average joes, and somewhat elevated from the other folks in towns and other trainers. But I,myself, think that, that's what makes them special. Unfortunately, I kind of think they definitely realize that you're also better in every way than them, almost no matter what they do, which kinda makes me feel sorry for them.
    I really don't feel like they should be labeled rivals TBH anyway, they're striving for something different. They feel more like lovable losers who are your somewhat dorky, but very good natured companions. I'm just no caring heavily for them thus far, shame because I was really looking forward to Shauna and Tierno. But so far, with one badge, neither has heavily interested me aside from Shauna's personality at times.
  14. John Understands's Avatar
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    I read some of this as if it were in Gligar13vids's voice for some reason.
  15. speedingbulletbill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Nintendo
    I read some of this as if it were in Gligar13vids's voice for some reason.
    That's funny because I just finished watching his "Pokemon X/Y Review: Why it is a terrible game" video! XD

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