Black Playthrough Thingie: El Parte de Drei
by, 11th March 2012 at 05:30 PM (251 Views)
Long grass. For years, I was afraid to leave town because of it. Who knows what fearsome monsters lurked within? Cheren and Bianca didn't seem scared - Bianca even proposed we catch some!
I took a step into the grass. Nothing. I walked around for a while, making my way to Bianca and Cheren. Nothing. Finally I just ran around in circles until I ran into something.
Ohhh! It's one of those Yappy Things!I can always hear them outside, yipping and barking when I'm trying to sleep. I had Tagiru tackle it to death.
Tagiru grew to Lv. 7 and learned Water Gun!
I finally caught up with the others. Once there, Bianca asked me, "How many Pokemon did you catch? I got one, a Lillipup!"
"None," I said.
"You didn't even catch one?" Cheren scoffed. "Bianca and I both caught one. Wow, you're such a fail trainer, not even catching a Route 1 Pokemon or a Cut Slave-"
I socked Cheren in the jaw. Enraged, the little asshole jumped on me, pounding at my chest with his tiny girl fists. Bianca watched in horror as the two of us fought. Cheren and me just slammed intoto each other repeatedly. Bitch kept pounding on me.
After a while, we just sort of stopped and entered the next town over, Accumula Town. There, some cunt in a snuggie was making a speech about fucking Pokemon or whatever.
"My name is Ghetsis," the man in the snuggie said. "I am here representing Team Plasma."
I assumed he was one of those 'teams' related to that Twilight series. Damn public stunt shit.
"Today, ladies adn gentlemen, I would like to talk to you about Pokemon liberation."
"Huh?" came cried from the audience. "What?"
"I'm sure most of you believe that we humans and Pokemon are partners that have come to live together because we want and need each other."
"Yeah, he's a PokeFucker," I said to myself. "I know where this is going."
"However, is that really the truth?"
"Get off the staaaaaaaaaage!" I called out.
After a moment, Ghetsis continued: "Have you ever considered that perhaps we humans..."
"...only assume that this is the truth?"
A few people were looking at me, while many stared at Ghetsis. Assholes. Pay attention to what this man was saying!
"Pokemon are subject to the selfish commands of trainers-"
"Hurry up and get to the point, asshole!" I called out.
"Hey, shut up!" a green-haired guy in the audience hissed at me.
"Can anyone say in confidence that there is no truth to what I'm saying?" Ghetsis concluded.
I threw Tagiru at his face, getting Ghetsis right in the eye.
"I think I made my point," Ghetsis grumbled, and walked off the stage. The crowd followed his lead, slowly dispersing until only me, Cheren, and that green-haired kid from earlier remained.
"Your Pokemon...." the boy said to me, slowly walked towards me and Cheren.
"What about it?" I asked.
Tagiru lay broken on the stage.
"Just now, it was saying..." he continued.
"Hold on," Cheren said. "Slow down. You talk way too fast."
"No he isn't, Cheren," I said. "Shut up, retard."
"Okay....But Pokemon can't talk."
"So I'm guessing you didn't hear it," said Jolly Green-Haired Giant.
"I heard it slam against Ghetsis's face and slide down the stairs," I said.
"My name is N."
"I'm Jesus," I said sarcastically.
"My name is Cheren," Cheren said.
"Jesus, let me hear your Pokemon's voice again!" N screeched.
Oshawott grew to Lv. 8!
"I never expected to hear your Pokemon say such things," N said.
"What did it say, fruitcake?" I asked.
"It's the sound of one slowly dying."
"You suck as a Trainer," I said. "You should give up."
"I will never give up on my dream."
After a moment, N added, "Go on, ask me about my dream."
Next time: let's actually catch some Pokemon!
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