Updated 23rd December 2013 at 05:21 PM by scheisskopf
Hey! Don't give up, hun. :c It'll be okay, just try to stay positive. <3 Stress can really overwhelm someone, so you have to take a step back to relax.
That's awful :( I'm also finishing up my first semester in college, and I don't have very many good friends either. Most of them are just friends I talk to once in a while but nothing special. But all I have to say is just wait for next semester :) I just registered for my classes next semester on Friday and I am just anticipating it and I'm waiting for it :) if you just anticipate life and look forward to the next day, you'll be fine and graduation will seem faster, trust me!
Honestly, it doesn't sound like there's anything wrong with you as a person, it sounds like your college just isn't a good fit for you... no shame in that. If your friends are in your hometown, why not consider transferring to a college closer to you, even a local community college? No education is worth going through what you're describing, and it sounds like you'd be much happier elsewhere.
I didn't have many friends either in college and the one person who hung out with me in college was always unintentionally or not, ruining my self esteem. But joining a club or an organization will really help out. I know you might have a problem speaking to other people but just try to open up and don't give up. It sucks being alone. You could even go Greek if you're bold but if not Hey a club can be just as or even more fun. I've been a lot happier after joining a club and I don't feel so bitter anymore.
thanks for the support and responses, everyone. i think this is part of a larger problem that i’ve been going through for a while but have been ignoring or at least refusing to recognize as a problem. lysandre, i think you’re right in that this university isn’t a good fit for me (i’m planning on transferring to columbia u if all goes well these next few quarters), but i think the alienation and the unhappiness i’m experiencing are allogeneic and have to do with me as a person. i don’t know. i think i’ve just become disillusioned with college and i’m too embarrassed to talk to people and i’m just watching myself fail which is a problem, naturally. i'm having a bit of a meltdown but i feel like i'll be alright. i guess. incidentally, i ended up with a 95 on my calculus midterm despite not studying, so that was cool. i think i’m eventually going to go seek counseling while i’m here – i probably can’t continue going on like this without any form of recourse. i've joined a few clubs and whatnot, but everything is just getting a little frustrating. i'll keep going.