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My spoon is too big, could you help me?

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by , 20th January 2010 at 10:33 PM (289 Views)
SHABAM.

I watch this every morning and it makes my day a little brighter...My morning routine is automatically badass.

In other news, I am insane, and, I found a picture from when I was 10, LOL COMPETING at the WORLDWIDE POKEMANZ TOURNAMENT:



Such a wee lass.

Can we talk about how epically fail-tastic relationships are? Giving your trust, body and love to someone who could stab you in the back literally at any moment, and yet you still take the plunge. Isn't that completely against human intuition? Yet we do it. Over. And. Over. Fascinating.

Excerpt from writing:

I am well beyond positive you’ve done well for yourself. After all, you left that lady-tramp of yours. The one with the banshee-like overtones to her voice, the birds nest of an excuse she’d like to call hair, and her never-ending bouts of despair. Naturally, you left me for greener pastures (and, more attractive ones). Guilt-smitten, you encase yourself in college friends, who will sit there and comfort you. They’ll pat you on the back, reassuring you of your decision. They’ll remind you of my repulsive habits, my lack of social skills, and my instability. They’ll reminisce of the times when I would have temper tantrums and those ill-fated nights when you’d get enraged about my emotionally hostile behavior. As you fuck your new prospects, you casually drop our memories to the memory attic where they go for safe-keeping and a good riddance. Penetrating her, you make a note to yourself to shit-talk me to your friends about how I’d never have sex with you. I was never quite sexual enough for your manly needs and desires, so you were more than glad to be rid of the baggage. Frat parties will now return to their previous social function, one at which you can drink to your hearts content and woo beautiful, mysterious women. All of your brothers will crowd around you and welcome you back to the pick-up game-

you’ve been sorely missed.

but one day, I won't miss you.



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Comments

  1. DCM's Avatar
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    I take it you're recieving pressure concerning relationships?
  2. Eliana Rampage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DCM
    I take it you're recieving pressure concerning relationships?
    Nope. Got cheated on/dumped a while ago and I've been in bent up shape. I shall message you abouts it so I don't sound like a weeaboo. :)
  3. DCM's Avatar
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    That was my second guess, and ok dokey
  4. Sublime's Avatar
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    FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, MY ANUS IS BLEEDING!
    YAY!
    WHAAAAAAAAA!

    :)
  5. Eliana Rampage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ιиsσмиιαc
    FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, MY ANUS IS BLEEDING!
    YAY!
    WHAAAAAAAAA!

    :)
    I AM THE QUEEN OF FRANCEEEEEEE

    DOYOOOOO
  6. Nekusagi's Avatar
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    I AM A BANANA!!!!
  7. Eliana Rampage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nekusagi
    I AM A BANANA!!!!
    I LIVE IN A GIANT BUCKET
  8. Stranger's Avatar
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    I remember watching those cartoons ages ago. Those were awesome. :D

    YAY, I'M A CONSUMER WHORE!
  9. Nelly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stranger
    I'M A CONSUMER WHORE!
    And how...

    Rejected deserved an Oscar... at least it got nominated...
  10. Eliana Rampage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by YeOldeJacob
    And how...

    Rejected deserved an Oscar... at least it got nominated...
    Didn't it win an award though? I could have sworn it won an Academy?

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