I Pretty-Much Hate My Life Right-Now
by, 27th January 2013 at 11:12 AM (2309 Views)
My mom and I live with her parents, and my youngers cousins get sent-over a lot, because my mom's brother and sister seem to think we don't have lives and exist to watch their children when they have better things to do.
I'm the oldest grandchild. And so my grandparents expect me to be happy and smiley and accomidating all the time. Basically, they want me to do whatever they think I should do whenever they want it done, without any sort of sign that I don't want to.
Just yesterday, my bed got taken-apart to sell and I had to sleep with my mom.
Two of my cousins (Emarah, 9, and Bradley, 4) stayed the night, and are still here. They have strewn dollhouse stuff all over my room. I told them they had to clean-up before they went home, they start mouthing me, and somehow I'm the bad-guy.
Then, I was going to audition for a local musical, but my mom forgot to get music, and forgot to tell me when auditions were, and Nana starts critiquing that, and running her mouth (she and Papa run their mouths constantly, like badmouthing my mom and me are their God-given right).
She was just going on and on about how we never fucking prepare for anything, and how stupid it is, and how she was making a real easy decision for everyone, give-up. And how she hasta do everything around here.
Who has the gigantic list of chores? Me!
I can't even go to my room to escape her bitching, because Gid forbid someone disturb the precious babies' playtime in someone-else's room with someone-else's stuff.
And last week, I tried to get into my school play (8-person cast) and the girls they picked were three seniors who get everything, and one sophomore who gets everything, because her mom is a teacher.
I'm also part of a dance-company (with singing, which is my main thing). I've never had a lead in one of our story-shows. I always sing before the show starts so people don't get bored and leave.
When we did our own version of Sleeping Beauty recently, the program didn't even list me as being part of the cast. My name was under "Crew." I've been part of the company for 7 years, since it started. Longer than most of the ones with roles. But my specialty isn't dancing. So, you know, apparently I don't count.
No-matter what it is or who it is, I'm never good-enough or important-enough.
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