CommanderPigg

"He's really nice. I can't believe he still wants to hang out with you after seeing how dorky you are."
Yeah, but he's nice to anyone. The person sitting next to him in class, the stranger on the bus, the old lady crossing the street. It's no wonder he's so popular. I'm probably just a nuisance.

"Yeah, but I think he sees you as a good friend, even compared to all the High School friends he has attending the college!"
What are you talking about...? Haven't you made good friends already as well? And he's just that...a friend.

"But, I really want to try to get to know him better! He's so similar to you...both mathematically challenged, both amv connoisseurs/creators, both anime fanatics, both having the same brand of dirty humor...yet he compliments you so well with his subdued nature and his kindred ways."
And that's exactly why I can't be with him.

"Why? Because he's too good for you?"
Yeah, not only that, but he's kinda taken, remember?

"...I know."
By someone who also outclasses you in the "history" department...these two were in the IB program together since freshman year of High School. Who are you to compete with that?

"But she might be boring, or fake, or...or..."
You know none of those things are true. They're perfect for each other. Even you like this girl, she's a cool person. You can't find any flaws against her, can you?

"No..."
And the most important thing is that he's happy, right?

"Yes..."
Good. Just remember that. Plus, rejection hurts, right?

"I wouldn't know, I never confessed."
Maybe it's better that way then. You can never get hurt if you don't risk anything.



But if this is for the best, why does it still hurt?



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Conversations with myself; a personal journal I wrote this January. I'm over it now, but it's still relevant.