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Transfinite

A coming out

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by , 17th March 2011 at 08:54 AM (733 Views)
Since I wound up still posting here, somehow? I figure I should let people here know.

Back in November, I came out as female-to-[url=http://neutrois.com/]neutrois[/url] transgendered. This means my gender is neither male nor female nor anywhere in between the two. If you refer to me in the third person, I'd prefer the pronoun "it", or if you absolutely can't bring yourself to say that, then "they/them".

I'm saying this here because (A) Most people here know me as female, so by not saying it I'm implicitly lying, and (B) Bulbagarden is the first place I actually came out as transgendered, back when I was a teenager, but a certain cisgendered person told me I was making it up for attention and bullied me back into the closet (I was younger, more cowardly, and less resilient then than I am now). It's probably for the best, since I didn't know the proper terminology back then and thought I was bigender, which is actually the exact opposite of what I really am.

If all you're going to say is "Why are you telling us this" or "But there's only 2 genders lolol", don't bother commenting.

/ducks out

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  1. Karamazov's Avatar
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    Cool. :P Good to see you're not hiding yourself, unlike a lot of people.

    Off-topic: Love the avatar; what are those, summer colours?
  2. Transfinite's Avatar
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    Thank you :)

    It's actually the wood-grain pattern GIMP comes installed with. I stuck it on this avatar with a semi-transparency to see how it'd look, and I loved the result.
  3. Karamazov's Avatar
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    I love it too.
  4. $aturn¥oshi's Avatar
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    I know it can be hard to portray yourself as you really are, but you have proved to be a courageous, strong-willed individual over the time I've know you, so props are to be given.
  5. Bikini Miltank's Avatar
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    More power to you. "It" can be a problematic pronoun for a lot of people... I feel kind of weird using it, to be honest, since I've known enough transgender people who balk at it, having had it used as a derogatory manner against them. But good for you. I wish I had half of your fortitude.

    You're very much missed, by the way >.>
  6. Zekurom's Avatar
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    Would you prefer I use "e" or "em"?

    I somehow remember that Astinus from PokéCommunity is in the same situation as you. Do you know "em"?

    Anyway, nice to see you back - I think... ...you're kind of like Nekusagi in that regard, methinks.
  7. Evil Figment's Avatar
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    Hey, a query resulting from a little incident over in the staff forums.

    I'll admit outright, I'm extremely uncomfortable with using it to refer to a person. It is a thing to me, and using it for a person make me feel like I'm automatically categorizing them as less-than-human.

    What I've been trying to do is simply avoid refering to you by third-person pronouns, and instead refer to you by name. But there's been some doubt whether that was acceptable from your point of view, so I figured I'd put the question before you.
  8. Transfinite's Avatar
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    [quote]Would you prefer I use "e" or "em"?

    I somehow remember that Astinus from PokéCommunity is in the same situation as you. Do you know "em"?
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    I don't really like e/em, but I'll live if you use them for me. My preference is basically, in order, [i]it > they > anything made-up[/i].

    And no, I haven't met em. I don't go to Pokecommunity :(

    [quote]I'll admit outright, I'm extremely uncomfortable with using it to refer to a person. It is a thing to me, and using it for a person make me feel like I'm automatically categorizing them as less-than-human.

    What I've been trying to do is simply avoid refering to you by third-person pronouns, and instead refer to you by name. But there's been some doubt whether that was acceptable from your point of view, so I figured I'd put the question before you.[/quote]
    So sorry for not replying until now, I was [i]mysteriously banned[/i]. Like I said upwards in this post I'm cool with "they" also, but just my name is all right if that's what you're comfortable with.

    I also want to express my gratitude for respecting my wishes even in places where I can't see it. That means a lot to me.

    (Edit:) Would it help if you thought of "it" as referring to a Pokemon? :D I mean I'm not a furry or anything, but we call Alakazam "it" and they have IQs of like a million or something.