"Hello, is this the General Hospital?...It is?...Yes, I wonder can you connect me with the person who gives out information about patients please?...Oh, the person's name in this case is Mr. John Fitzgerald in room 302 please...Yes I'll wait...I have to be connected to the nursing station?...Could you do that for me please?...Yes I'll wait...Yes Nurse, can you give me the condition of Mr. John Fitzgerald in room 302 please?...Yes I'll wait...Yes nurse...He's doing very well? He's had three full
A burglar broke into a house one night and began placing any valuables he could find into his duffel bag. Suddenly, from out of the darkness, a voice said:
"Jesus is watching."
The startled burglar froze, but when nothing else happened, he concluded that he had just been hearing things. He continued to look for valuables and was about to disconnect the stereo when he heard the voice again:
"Jesus is watching."
This time he decided the voice must
Updated 1st December 2009 at 07:54 PM by Geodude
True Baseball Injuries
These are true injuries suffered by baseball players.
Infielder Chris Brown missed a game because he "slept on his eye funny".
Pitcher Adam Eaton stabbed himself in the stomach as he was using a knife to open a DVD wrapper.
Sammy Sosa was disabled after a violent sneeze.
Pitcher Jeff Juden missed a start because a tattoo he got prior to the season opener got infected.
Reliever Randy Flores was
Bob was an unskilled laborer who decided to take some general university courses to sharpen his mind and hopefully improve his job prospects. One day he met with a professor at the university.
"Well," said the professor, once they had met, "I've looked over your file, and I suggest you take three courses: Mathematics, Physics, and Logic."
"Logic...what's that?" asked Bob.
"Well, let me explain by way of example," said the professor. "Do you own a lawn
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.
However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their